Recast Classic Movies

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BiggerBoat: Sep 26, 2007; Don't you tell me my business again.

Been listening to some podcasts on The RInger website

https://www.theringer.com/the-rewatchables/archives

That I've been enjoying

They've been having some fun with updating old movies with a modern cast here and there as a part of their episodes and I know there's a lot of movie nerds here. One bit in particular they do is muddle over the idea of recasting classic films, either with actors during the time or with an imaginary remake that casts current actors in the famous role(s).

I thought it might be fun to kick that around so I'll start with a film that has arguably the greatest cast of actors ever assembled in one movie.

Glengarry Glen Ross

Ricky Roma (Pacino): Brad Pitt
Shelly Levine: (Jack Lemmon) Paul Giamatti
Blake: (Alec Baldwin) Leo Dicaprio
George Aranow: (Alan Arkin) Jason Alexander
John Williamson (Kevin Spacey): Steve Buscemi
Dave Moss (Ed Harris): Idris Elba

Not saying they should remake these films at all so much as imagining a different movie and playing games in my head. I dunno. The podcast talks about original casting choices (like Marie Osmond and Linda Ronstadt for Sandy in Grease) for movies that actually got made and poo poo like that so maybe we can have some fun with it. I'm just loving around a little bit here.

JAWS

Brody (Roy Scheider) : Denzel Washington
Quint (Robert Shaw): Billy Bob Thornton
Hooper (Richard Dreyfuss): Jesse Eisenberg

I'm thinking bonus points if we can come with something truly weird.

# ? Mar 20, 2023 00:48

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# ? May 14, 2024 15:55

Timeless Appeal: May 28, 2006

STAR WARS

Luke Skywalker--Caleb McLaughlin
Han Solo--Pedro Pascal
Princess Leia-- Kristen Stewart
Grand Moff Tarkin--Tilda Swinton
C-3PO--James Acaster
Obi-Wan Kenobi--Sean Bean
Darth Vader voiced by Phil LaMarr
Uncle Owen--Brian Tyree Henry

# ? Mar 20, 2023 01:19

banned from Starbucks: Jul 18, 2004

ghostbusters
Peter Venkman (Bill Murray) - Ryan Reynolds or Dane Cook
Egon Spengler (Harold Ramis) - Clive Owen
Ray Stanz (Dan Aykroyd) - Pacey from dawsons creek
Winston Zeddemore (Ernie Hudson) - Cedric the Entertainer
Louis Tully (Rick Moranis) - The McLovin kid
Janine (Annie Potts) - Sarah Silverman

banned from Starbucks fucked around with this message at 07:00 on Mar 20, 2023

# ? Mar 20, 2023 06:35

Robot Style: Jul 5, 2009

I've kind of wondered what might have happened if George Lucas had gone straight from Return of the Jedi to doing the prequels, and Episode I came out in the late 80s. In order to keep the casting to people who might realistically be on Lucas' radar, I'm primarily picking people who were in Lucasfilm productions around that time.

Anakin - River Phoenix would probably be a bit too old for Kid Anakin and a bit too young for Adult Anakin, but could be a good choice if they wanted to cast someone who was somewhere in the middle so the character wouldn't have to become a completely different person between movies.
Padme - Jennifer Connelly would actually be an age-appropriate match for River Phoenix as Anakin.
Obi-Wan - Ralph Fiennes likely wouldn't be on Lucas' radar until after Spielberg cast him in Schindler's List, but Ian McDiarmid was cast as Palpatine after the film's casting director saw him in a play as Howard Hughes, so a young stage actor like Fiennes could conceivably end up in the running. Despite how unlikely it seems that he might get the role, some concept art for the character in Episode I actually used Fiennes' face, so it definitely seems like he would have at least been considered if Lucas was aware of him.
Qui-Gon Jinn - Jeff Bridges. Bridges is only a few years older than Liam Neeson, but Lucas originally wanted an American actor for the role, and Bridges could definitely play a slightly-disgruntled renegade Jedi. He could make an interesting pairing with Fiennes as well, and might make the contrast between the stuck-up Obi-Wan and the more loose Qui-Gon more apparent than what actually ended up in the film.
Jar Jar Binks - Michael Jackson. In the real world, Jackson specifically asked Lucas if he could play the role, and if it were the 80's and Jackson were unrecognizable under heavy makeup, he might have let him.
Mace Windu - Toshiro Mifune. Lucas originally asked Mifune to play Obi-Wan in A New Hope, but was turned down because Mifune didn't want to tarnish the image of a samurai by being in (what he assumed would be) a cheap looking sci-fi movie. With the rest of the trilogy under his belt, Lucas could probably get Mifune to appear in a small role as Windu.
Nute Gunray - The Neimoidians might skew closer to the Skeksis from The Dark Crystal in an 80's version of the movie, so Gunray might be played by another Muppet alumni like Jerry Nelson.
Darth Maul - Lucas originally cast Benicio Del Toro in the role, but Del Toro left the movie after Maul's dialogue was cut down - so then the role went to stunt performer Ray Park, with his voice being dubbed over by Peter Serafinowicz. Nick Gillard, who was the stunt coordinator and fight choreographer for the prequels, was in several Lucasfilm movies in the 80's so might have ended up playing Maul himself. He doesn't have a very threatening voice though, so they'd still probably find someone to dub him. Since it's unlikely they'd go for someone super famous for 5 lines of dialogue, I'll put in Richard McGonagle, who has a Lucasfilm connection through Howard the Duck, and also voiced General Grievous in the 2D Clone Wars cartoon. Or maybe since it is such a small role, an uncredited David Bowie might come in to do the voice as a favor after Labyrinth.

The other prequels don't have a ton of other casting opportunities. Dooku could still be played by Christopher Lee, and Grievous would have to be altered so much to work in a pre-Jurassic Park world that he'd basically be a new character.

Bail Organa becomes important later on, and Val Kilmer could be an interesting choice, especially if there's story changes to give him a bigger role. Maybe he could be more of a Han-like mentor to Padme, which could make Anakin jealous, but it would probably be waste to just put him in the series as-written.

Jango Fett would be an interesting one - Lucas' original plan was for Lando to be a clone from the Clone Wars instead of Boba Fett, and was even thinking that Return of the Jedi might have a bunch of Lando clones in it. Since Billy Dee Williams would still be fairly young, I could see Lucas going forward with that idea and making the "original" Lando the donor for the clones. I don't know if he would have also been Boba Fett's dad as well, but Lucas probably would have introduced a young Lando instead of young Boba.

# ? Mar 21, 2023 01:35

ruddiger: Jun 3, 2004

Reservoir Dogs

Mr Pink - Anthony Mackie
Mr White - Lawrence Fishburne
Mr Orange - Cuba Gooding Jr
Mr Brown - Common
Mr Blonde - Terrence Howard
Nice Guy Eddie - Anthony Anderson
Joe - Chi McBride
Holdaway - Patton Oswalt

I�m cheating though because this was the cast for the live reading back in 2012.

# ? Mar 21, 2023 03:15

BiggerBoat: Sep 26, 2007; Don't you tell me my business again.

SOmeone said Travolta was up for the part of Josh in BIG, and even though It real's hard to really imagine anyone than Tom Hanks there, I can almost kind of see it working.

ruddiger posted:

Reservoir Dogs

Mr Pink - Anthony Mackie
Mr White - Lawrence Fishburne
Mr Orange - Cuba Gooding Jr
Mr Brown - Common
Mr Blonde - Terrence Howard
Nice Guy Eddie - Anthony Anderson
Joe - Chi McBride
Holdaway - Patton Oswalt

I�m cheating though because this was the cast for the live reading back in 2012.

^^^This is pretty inspired.^^^

I was gonna try Reservoir Dogs myself. It's one of the movies I want to try that are already so perfectly cast it's next to impossible

I've been kickin around comedy options in my head and thought of My DInner With Andre starring Peter Dinklage and Lawrence Tierney. ABout 20 years ago during an acid trip me and my friends were recasting the most absurd leads for Dracula and we bounced around Ned Beatty, John Goodman and Ernest Borgnine where we had a good laugh.

Bram Stokers Dracula:

Dracula: WIllam Defoe (I know this is cheating but god drat)
John Harker: Benedict Cumberbatch
Van Helsing: Donald Pleasence
Mina: Jen Fischer
Renfield: Joaquin Phoenix

Also, serious talk: I always wanted to see a WIlly Wonka remake with Prince in the lead role since he practically WAS WIlly Wonka, only with music as his primary vessel. Instead of the chocolate factory, he had Paisley Park. He gave out purple tickets once in his CD's and folks who won one and attended said he played "Pure Imagination" in the lobby. His unique brand of weirdness and inherent reclusiveness wouldn't have been half as off putting as what Johnny Depp did either. And god drat, how good would the music have been?

I want to do The Rocky Horror Picture Show next but I need to give that one careful consideration.

BiggerBoat fucked around with this message at 22:55 on Mar 21, 2023

# ? Mar 21, 2023 22:53

Magic Hate Ball: May 6, 2007; ha ha ha!
you've already paid for this

Thinking about a cursed remake of A Woman Under The Influence that reunites Jennifer Lawrence and Bradley Cooper under the direction of David O Russell.

# ? Mar 22, 2023 00:13

caligulamprey: Jan 23, 2007; It never stops.

It's not a classic nor am I gonna do the whole thing, but after watching it for the first time last week, man I want a remake of Falling Down starring Andy Daly.

# ? Mar 22, 2023 02:08

Torquemada: Oct 21, 2010; Drei GlÃ¤ser

North By Northwest, with George Clooney as Thornhill and David Dastmalchian as Leonard. Maybe Hugh Laurie in the James Mason part, maybe Anna Kendrick in the Eve Marie Saint role.

# ? Mar 22, 2023 20:45

MacheteZombie: Feb 4, 2007

caligulamprey posted:

It's not a classic nor am I gonna do the whole thing, but after watching it for the first time last week, man I want a remake of Falling Down starring Andy Daly.

Lol

# ? Mar 22, 2023 22:31

ruddiger: Jun 3, 2004

Falling Down is absolutely a classic, and I was heartbroken when the Army Surplus Store in the movie was sold to land developers a few years back.

# ? Mar 22, 2023 22:33

BiggerBoat: Sep 26, 2007; Don't you tell me my business again.

Some really cool gender/race swap ideas so far.

I started thinking about courtroom dramas and now I want to see the cast of Better Call Saul rolled into A Few Good Men

Tom Cruise (Lt. Daniel Kaffee) - Rhea Seehorn
Jack Nicholson (Col. Nathan R. Jessep) - Brian Cranston
Demi Moore (Lt. Cdr. JoAnne Galloway) - Bob Odenkirk or Patrick Fabian
Kevin Bacon (Capt. Jack Ross) - Patrick Fabian or Bob Odenkirk
Kiefer Sutherland (Jonathan Kendrick) - Giancarlo Esposito
Kevin Pollak (Lt. Sam Weinberg) - Michael Mando
J.A. Preston (Judge Julius Alexander Randolph) - Jonathan Banks

You'd have to de-age a few of these actors. Or just imagine them at the right age.

BiggerBoat fucked around with this message at 12:14 on Mar 23, 2023

# ? Mar 22, 2023 23:19

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your mother!

BiggerBoat posted:

Alan Cranston

Uh...

# ? Mar 22, 2023 23:25

Adrianics: Aug 15, 2006; Affirmative. Yes. Yo. Right on. My man.

I've always wondered what the cast of a modern remake of 12 Angry Men would be. Quick ideas off the top of my head:

Juror 1: Don Cheadle

Juror 2: Nick Mohammed

Juror 3: JK Simmons

Juror 4: Giancarlo Esposito

Juror 5: Steven Yeun

Juror 6: John Cusack

Juror 7: Robert Downey Jr

Juror 8: Tim Robbins

Juror 9: Christopher Plummer

Juror 10: Dean Norris

Juror 11: Christoph Waltz

Juror 12: Jason Sudeikis

# ? Mar 23, 2023 08:55

BiggerBoat: Sep 26, 2007; Don't you tell me my business again.

Timby posted:

Uh...

Whoops. Fixed

# ? Mar 23, 2023 12:14

Das Boo: Jun 9, 2011; There was a GHOST here.
It's gone now.

I haven't given thought to the rest of the cast, but I desperately want John C. Reilly to play Mitch in A Streetcar Named Desire.

# ? Mar 23, 2023 15:46

Narzack: Sep 15, 2008

Robot Style posted:

I've kind of wondered what might have happened if George Lucas had gone straight from Return of the Jedi to doing the prequels, and Episode I came out in the late 80s. In order to keep the casting to people who might realistically be on Lucas' radar, I'm primarily picking people who were in Lucasfilm productions around that time.

Anakin - River Phoenix would probably be a bit too old for Kid Anakin and a bit too young for Adult Anakin, but could be a good choice if they wanted to cast someone who was somewhere in the middle so the character wouldn't have to become a completely different person between movies.

Padme - Jennifer Connelly would actually be an age-appropriate match for River Phoenix as Anakin.

Obi-Wan - Ralph Fiennes likely wouldn't be on Lucas' radar until after Spielberg cast him in Schindler's List, but Ian McDiarmid was cast as Palpatine after the film's casting director saw him in a play as Howard Hughes, so a young stage actor like Fiennes could conceivably end up in the running. Despite how unlikely it seems that he might get the role, some concept art for the character in Episode I actually used Fiennes' face, so it definitely seems like he would have at least been considered if Lucas was aware of him.

Qui-Gon Jinn - Jeff Bridges. Bridges is only a few years older than Liam Neeson, but Lucas originally wanted an American actor for the role, and Bridges could definitely play a slightly-disgruntled renegade Jedi. He could make an interesting pairing with Fiennes as well, and might make the contrast between the stuck-up Obi-Wan and the more loose Qui-Gon more apparent than what actually ended up in the film.

Jar Jar Binks - Michael Jackson. In the real world, Jackson specifically asked Lucas if he could play the role, and if it were the 80's and Jackson were unrecognizable under heavy makeup, he might have let him.

Mace Windu - Toshiro Mifune. Lucas originally asked Mifune to play Obi-Wan in A New Hope, but was turned down because Mifune didn't want to tarnish the image of a samurai by being in (what he assumed would be) a cheap looking sci-fi movie. With the rest of the trilogy under his belt, Lucas could probably get Mifune to appear in a small role as Windu.

Nute Gunray - The Neimoidians might skew closer to the Skeksis from The Dark Crystal in an 80's version of the movie, so Gunray might be played by another Muppet alumni like Jerry Nelson.

Darth Maul - Lucas originally cast Benicio Del Toro in the role, but Del Toro left the movie after Maul's dialogue was cut down - so then the role went to stunt performer Ray Park, with his voice being dubbed over by Peter Serafinowicz. Nick Gillard, who was the stunt coordinator and fight choreographer for the prequels, was in several Lucasfilm movies in the 80's so might have ended up playing Maul himself. He doesn't have a very threatening voice though, so they'd still probably find someone to dub him. Since it's unlikely they'd go for someone super famous for 5 lines of dialogue, I'll put in Richard McGonagle, who has a Lucasfilm connection through Howard the Duck, and also voiced General Grievous in the 2D Clone Wars cartoon. Or maybe since it is such a small role, an uncredited David Bowie might come in to do the voice as a favor after Labyrinth.

The other prequels don't have a ton of other casting opportunities. Dooku could still be played by Christopher Lee, and Grievous would have to be altered so much to work in a pre-Jurassic Park world that he'd basically be a new character.

Bail Organa becomes important later on, and Val Kilmer could be an interesting choice, especially if there's story changes to give him a bigger role. Maybe he could be more of a Han-like mentor to Padme, which could make Anakin jealous, but it would probably be waste to just put him in the series as-written.

Jango Fett would be an interesting one - Lucas' original plan was for Lando to be a clone from the Clone Wars instead of Boba Fett, and was even thinking that Return of the Jedi might have a bunch of Lando clones in it. Since Billy Dee Williams would still be fairly young, I could see Lucas going forward with that idea and making the "original" Lando the donor for the clones. I don't know if he would have also been Boba Fett's dad as well, but Lucas probably would have introduced a young Lando instead of young Boba.

I can see all these working, pretty cool

# ? Apr 9, 2023 19:00

Charlz Guybon: Nov 16, 2010

Narzack posted:

I can see all these working, pretty cool

Is Lucas actually going to direct it? Then no, none of those will work.

# ? Apr 12, 2023 10:35

Pillowpants: Aug 5, 2006

Adrianics posted:

I've always wondered what the cast of a modern remake of 12 Angry Men would be. Quick ideas off the top of my head:

Juror 1: Don Cheadle

Juror 2: Nick Mohammed

Juror 3: JK Simmons

Juror 4: Giancarlo Esposito

Juror 5: Steven Yeun

Juror 6: John Cusack

Juror 7: Robert Downey Jr

Juror 8: Tim Robbins

Juror 9: Christopher Plummer

Juror 10: Dean Norris

Juror 11: Christoph Waltz

Juror 12: Jason Sudeikis

A modern remake would be renamed 12 Angry jurors and be half women.

Juror 1: Giancarlo Esposito

Juror 2: Jesse Eisenberg

Juror 3: Sandra Bullock

Juror 4: Eugene Levy

Juror 5: Jenna Ortega

Juror 6: Joan Cusack

Juror 7: Robert Downey Jr

Juror 8: Batista

Juror 9: Jane Fonda

Juror 10: Vince Vaughn

Juror 11: Christoph Waltz

Juror 12: Jason Sudeikis

# ? Apr 28, 2023 21:19

Steve Yun: Aug 7, 2003; I'm a parasitic landlord that needs to get a job instead of stealing worker's money. Make sure to remind me when I post.; Soiled Meat

This might not be in the scope of the OP since I�m shoehorning a classic actor into modern movies but this motherfucker really should have been Charles Xavier

# ? May 2, 2023 08:40

Breetai: Nov 6, 2005; 🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

Sorry for thread Necro but gently caress me, 12 Angry Men is perhaps the one instance in movie history where there is a solid argument for the main cast of jurors to be exclusively white dudes. Like, now maybe more than ever, it is so undeniably relevant to the plot and to the theming. If you take away the threat of it turning into a prejudicial mob then you've turned it into a different movie and defanged it entirely.

# ? Aug 7, 2023 08:40

TrixRabbi: Aug 20, 2010; Time for a little robot chauvinism!

What are some classic movies where the cast actually isn't that strong? Full Metal Jacket comes to mind where, aside from R. Lee Ermey and D'Onofrio, who rightfully are the two everyone remembers, the rest of the cast is pretty bland and forgettable (part of why people always knock the second half of the film). If the rest of the soldiers had been angrier and more charged maybe things could have played better.

Modine is okay, but you can absolutely drop him and the rest of the cast, keeping Ermey and D'onofrio.

A younger Tom Cruise, particularly given his performance in Taps could have been great here as Pvt. Joker. Denzel Washington was reportedly trying to get a role in the film too but for some unknown reason Kubrick never considered him, which is absurd. Matt Dillon could have done a good Animal Mother, or a younger Willem Dafoe (really sub in a lot of the cast of Platoon, a bad movie, here and I think you turn Full Metal Jacket from a weaker Kubrick to one of the all time greats).

# ? Aug 7, 2023 18:55

El Gallinero Gros: Mar 17, 2010

Matrix made in the 70s

Bruce Lee-Neo
Sidney Poitier-Morpheus
Peter Sellers-Agent Smith
Bette Davis-The Oracle

This is swiped from a great photoshop on the web. Not sure who you have as Cypher

# ? Aug 7, 2023 22:48

Colonel Whitey: May 22, 2004; This shit's about to go off.

El Gallinero Gros posted:

Not sure who you have as Cypher

John Cazale? Or maybe that�s too on the nose

E: you also forgot Trinity, but I�m having a hard time coming up with a good one. Maybe Sigourney Weaver

Colonel Whitey fucked around with this message at 05:58 on Aug 8, 2023

# ? Aug 8, 2023 05:51

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your mother!

Colonel Whitey posted:

E: you also forgot Trinity, but I�m having a hard time coming up with a good one. Maybe Sigourney Weaver

Lynda Carter?

# ? Aug 8, 2023 06:11

FunkyAl: Mar 28, 2010; Your vitals soar.

TrixRabbi posted:

What are some classic movies where the cast actually isn't that strong? Full Metal Jacket comes to mind where, aside from R. Lee Ermey and D'Onofrio, who rightfully are the two everyone remembers, the rest of the cast is pretty bland and forgettable (part of why people always knock the second half of the film). If the rest of the soldiers had been angrier and more charged maybe things could have played better.

Modine is okay, but you can absolutely drop him and the rest of the cast, keeping Ermey and D'onofrio.

A younger Tom Cruise, particularly given his performance in Taps could have been great here as Pvt. Joker. Denzel Washington was reportedly trying to get a role in the film too but for some unknown reason Kubrick never considered him, which is absurd. Matt Dillon could have done a good Animal Mother, or a younger Willem Dafoe (really sub in a lot of the cast of Platoon, a bad movie, here and I think you turn Full Metal Jacket from a weaker Kubrick to one of the all time greats).

When he was trying to get Eyes Wide Shut made on the 1980s, Steve Martin was his choice for the Tom Cruise role. This changed my perception of the film.

# ? Aug 8, 2023 07:59

FunkyAl: Mar 28, 2010; Your vitals soar.

Here is the ideal Star Trek Next Generation recast. You could call it the Next Next Generation.

Captain Picard - Tom Hardy
Beverly Crusher - Elizabeth Olson
Commander Riker - Benicio Del Toro
Miles O' Brien - Danny McBride
Geordi LaForge - Eric Andre
Commander Worf - Morgan Freeman
Lieutenant Data - Timothy Chalamet
The Boy Wesley - Christopher Mintz-Plasse
Counselor Troi - Amanda Seyfried
Tasha Yar - Amy Schumer

# ? Aug 8, 2023 08:11

feedmyleg: Dec 25, 2004

I adore Streets of Fire, but it would be a vastly better movie had Swayze been the lead.

# ? Aug 8, 2023 14:28

1: Feb 28, 2007; 1️⃣
Just another number.

FunkyAl posted:

Here is the ideal Star Trek Next Generation recast. You could call it the Next Next Generation.

I find your choice of an 86-year-old Worf highly appealing. But given your choice for Wesley and since Star Trek did pretty well with Chris Pine as Kirk, I think adding more Chrisses could work quite well:

Captain Picard - Chris Elliott
Beverly Crusher - Christina Applegate
Commander Riker - Chris Hemsworth
Miles O' Brien - Chris O'Dowd
Geordi LaForge - Chris Tucker
Commander Worf - Chris Williams
Lieutenant Data - Christopher Eccleston
The Boy Wesley - gently caress it, I can't think of anyone so I'm copying Christopher Mintz-Plasse
Counselor Troi - Christina Hendricks
Tasha Yar - Christina Ricci
Q - Christoph Waltz

# ? Aug 8, 2023 19:20

Neo Rasa: Mar 8, 2007; Everyone should play DUKE games.

El Gallinero Gros posted:

Matrix made in the 70s

Bruce Lee-Neo
Sidney Poitier-Morpheus
Peter Sellers-Agent Smith
Bette Davis-The Oracle

This is swiped from a great photoshop on the web. Not sure who you have as Cypher

Cypher - John Saxon EASILY

# ? Aug 8, 2023 19:31

Breetai: Nov 6, 2005; 🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

If it was made in the '70's Agent Smith would 10,000% be played by Yul Brynner and y'all know it.

# ? Aug 8, 2023 22:18

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# ? May 14, 2024 15:55

Clipperton: Dec 20, 2011; Grimey Drawer

FunkyAl posted:

Captain Picard - Tom Hardy

# ? Aug 9, 2023 19:06

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Cinema Discusso > Recast Classic Movies