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Gyshall posted:<same people proceed to print out pages and pages of emails> Yes, thank you for bringing me a copy of the email you just sent me that I have pulled up on the screen to read. I love clutter. Let me just put this in my document receptacle so that it can be taken to my document repository after I leave for the day thank you.
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Feb 24, 2015 16:22
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User submits ticket in all caps. User submits followup ticket in all caps. User replies to each ticket chain in all caps looking for update. User is belligerent and angry because of a lack of understanding of the system, but happily blames technician answering tickets. User, after being kindly reminded that all caps e-mails come across as hostile, says "Oh sorry, my caps lock was stuck on." User follows up with all caps e-mail and caps in subject line, causing new ticket to be created. Issue is finally closed out, user files survey response lambasting technician by questioning competence and stating that the proposed answer was actually wrong. It wasn't. I honestly don't think I would have a job still if I were the one to have taken on that ticket, and my colleague is a saint for not snapping.
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Feb 24, 2015 16:28
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Bob Morales posted:I don't get why people get a desktop + laptop. Use the laptop to remote into their desktop at work. What's the point? Let's buy multiple computers for everyone! Leave the work laptop at home and only use it 3 days a year! Remoting in to your desktop at work is kind of silly, but what I ended up doing at my last job was to set up my desktop as a git remote for my laptop, so that I could just pull my local changes before I went home and could do some work on the train if the urge so struck me. Typically, at least for development, the idea is that you'll use the more powerful desktop to actually develop on, but the laptop can be used as a fallback and/or remote connection mechanism when out of the office.
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Feb 24, 2015 17:17
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Volmarias posted:Typically, at least for development, the idea is that you'll use the more powerful desktop to actually develop on, but the laptop can be used as a fallback and/or remote connection mechanism when out of the office. These are just chucklefucks using Word/Excel. Get on VPN. Retrieve your files from the M: and U: drive. I cringe when people go laptop only because I know it's just a matter of time before they show up to work without their laptop and ask if I have a spare they can use. No! If you realized you forgot it right after you left the house why didn't you turn the gently caress around?
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Feb 24, 2015 17:27
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Eldercain posted:Yes, thank you for bringing me a copy of the email you just sent me that I have pulled up on the screen to read. I love clutter. Let me just put this in my document receptacle so that it can be taken to my document repository after I leave for the day thank you. My boss does this... Except he goes a lot further. The second he hits send; will then immediately call the recipient and proceed to discuss with them everything in the email. These calls sometimes last 15+ minutes. If its really important he will also print the email out and bring it to your desk. Often the recipient gets the phone call and printed copy before the original email arrives. He also gives WAY too much information. Instead of just saying "do this" in a email, he will also include a complete analysis of the task to be completed, such as the different methods to accomplish it, the pros/cons of each method, which method might be better overall, etc... Every email is a 1,000 word essay.
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Feb 24, 2015 17:51
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Going to SoCal tomorrow for a possible job!  Fingers crossed!
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Feb 24, 2015 18:15
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^ Grits. A DBA is asking me to copy files out to a server for him and also wants to know the IP of that server. What?
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Feb 24, 2015 18:25
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MC Fruit Stripe posted:A DBA is asking me to copy files out to a server for him and also wants to know the IP of that server. What?  I need to access server123, could you give me its IP? Why, is our DNS broken? No but I need the IP for remote desktop! edit2: This usually comes from the people who insist that everything (including workstations) need manually configured static IPs because "it's more secure!" edit: Good luck ratbert!
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Feb 24, 2015 18:32
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MC Fruit Stripe posted:^ Grits. It's Kevin Mitnick!
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Feb 24, 2015 18:35
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Client emails my work email directly for a request, rather than submitting it to our general queue. Client has a history of this, and has been told that direct emails may not be answered, and for prompt replies email our support email which everyone can access. I'll get him the info, but I'm working on another ticket, so he can wait 10 minutes. Client calls in. I gather info, and send it. As I'm sending it (less than 5 minutes after the phone conversation), he emails me directly, again, with "PLEASE SEND THIS INFO I NEED IT ASAP I DONT UNDERSTAND WHATS TAKING SO LONG". Less than a minute after that, his boss submits a ticket "WEVE BEEN WAITING ON THIS INFO FOR OVER TWO HOURS PLEASE GET IT TO US IMMEDIATELY" Client calls in right after that demanding that the info be sent. He actually has not checked his email. Where the info is. His response "Well you shouldn't have taken so long to send it"...okay loving people. Christ.
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Feb 24, 2015 18:40
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Collateral Damage posted:
DHCP, new and untested.
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Feb 24, 2015 18:43
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Going on hour 3 today of sitting in a Safeway waiting for a CenturyLink tech to show up to look at a DSL line. CenturyLink gave me a 4 hour window in which a tech would show up, which seems crazy for the amount of money we pay them a month.
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Feb 24, 2015 18:59
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Bob Morales posted:These are just chucklefucks using Word/Excel. These are invariably the people who save all their files to the hard disk and then wonder why they can't get to them later. You have a network share for a reason fffffffffffffffffffffff CitizenKain posted:Going on hour 3 today of sitting in a Safeway waiting for a CenturyLink tech to show up to look at a DSL line. CenturyLink gave me a 4 hour window in which a tech would show up, which seems crazy for the amount of money we pay them a month. What is with ISP companies doing this? You really can't give me a half hour timeslot? Why the gently caress do I have to take a half day of PTO so you can loving jimmy some equipment around for 10 minutes? Seriously, is there someone who's worked this field that can explain the 4 hour window?
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Feb 24, 2015 19:13
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Eldercain posted:Seriously, is there someone who's worked this field that can explain the 4 hour window? Working for an ISP you generally have an idea of when you can be out there HOWEVER there are times where you show up to an old ladies house to set up a digital box and it suddenly turns into a program entire system and teach a 90 year old how digital tv works and oh how can I still use my vcr.... Or a misreported problem. You go out for a tiling digital box to find out the entire drop needs to be replaced.
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Feb 24, 2015 19:16
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m.hache posted:Working for an ISP you generally have an idea of when you can be out there HOWEVER there are times where you show up to an old ladies house to set up a digital box and it suddenly turns into a program entire system and teach a 90 year old how digital tv works and oh how can I still use my vcr.... As a guy who still has to go to on-site calls constantly, the appeal of an appointment window is huge. I think the issue is that an ISP says "They'll be there at some point within a 4-hour window" and then that's it, they're a black box. They can't tell you if the tech is on their way, if they're late, where they are, why they've missed the 4-hour window, etc.
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Feb 24, 2015 19:22
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Eldercain posted:These are invariably the people who save all their files to the hard disk and then wonder why they can't get to them later. You have a network share for a reason fffffffffffffffffffffff At this point I'm not even sure I'm going to see this guy, or he's going to do the work at the DSLAM and never show up here. Right now I'm waiting on the security company to get here to re-open the machine. It would be nice if they at least called so I had an idea, I'm not far from the deli and I'm getting hungry.
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Feb 24, 2015 19:25
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Eldercain posted:Seriously, is there someone who's worked this field that can explain the 4 hour window?
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Feb 24, 2015 19:26
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CitizenKain posted:At this point I'm not even sure I'm going to see this guy, or he's going to do the work at the DSLAM and never show up here. I've been through this a couple of times where I was waiting somewhere like the IDF where I expect a circuit to be terminated and he'd go to the MPOE and do something and then bugger off. At least with some vendors I can get contact info for the tech to make sure this doesn't happen but with the big boys like Telepacific good luck.
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Feb 24, 2015 19:55
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Erwin posted:Imagine you are a faceless ISP and your customer has zero recourse due to your practical monopoly and contract terms. You have zero upside and slight downside to providing smaller windows. Why would you? This is why comcast is getting spanked right the hell out of town by our local fiber internet/tv provided by our municipal electric company. Every time I see one of their salespeople they're practically begging some apartment manager to put up fliers and we will give you a free package + HBO etc etc  It would be pretty neat to get a window and have the tech call when they think they're 30 minutes out or something instead of sitting around dick in hand like Kain here.
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Feb 24, 2015 19:59
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Eldercain posted:Why the gently caress do I have to take a half day of PTO so you can loving jimmy some equipment around for 10 minutes? Why the gently caress do you have to take a half day PTO to be onsite for work related activity. Hell, you should be getting mileage reimbursement as well if you used your own car.
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Feb 24, 2015 20:39
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Eldercain posted:What is with ISP companies doing this? You really can't give me a half hour timeslot? Why the gently caress do I have to take a half day of PTO so you can loving jimmy some equipment around for 10 minutes? It's a long running thing, cable companies used to be notorious for this in the 80s and 90s. There was a phenomenal Seinfeld episode about it. Guess who turned into major ISPs?
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Feb 24, 2015 20:48
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flosofl posted:Why the gently caress do you have to take a half day PTO to be onsite for work related activity. Hell, you should be getting mileage reimbursement as well if you used your own car. Oh this is bitching about personal home stuff. I don't ever take time off if I'm doing anything related to work ever. Driving included. I'm no chump 
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Feb 24, 2015 21:55
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Let the merger BEGIN! Well, not until next week, but still. Had my first phone call with the other companies "IT" manager, it went... well. They are 95% cloud based. We are 90% physical hardware based. Looks like everyone gets dual email accounts for now as we assess everything. It was fun until I mentioned certain security requirements we are supposed (key word) to be following. Now I get to have a nice long meeting going over security, vulnerabilities, and outside threats. Best part, during our phone call I got a followup from the HR director that phone screened me a few weeks back. They want to chat again this week and go from there. I can't wait to get out of this mess  .
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Feb 24, 2015 22:21
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Eldercain posted:This is why comcast is getting spanked right the hell out of town by our local fiber internet/tv provided by our municipal electric company. Every time I see one of their salespeople they're practically begging some apartment manager to put up fliers and we will give you a free package + HBO etc etc Sounds like a certain town is about to get educated on why municipal-run ISPs are evil, inefficient, job-destroying, freedom-hating, unconstitutional enemies of the free market!Paid for by the Koch Brothers Coalition for the Concerned Freedom-Interested Citizens of A Proud America
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Feb 24, 2015 22:26
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Spazz posted:User submits ticket in all caps. Heh, I sent out an e-mail etiquette "Tech Tip" a while back to the whole company that basically stated using all caps all the time made you look like an incompetent dullard that can't use a keyboard. I wrote it up in flowery language of course.
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Feb 24, 2015 22:35
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Spazz posted:User submits ticket in all caps. Do you guys have a means by which to review / back-up your teammates?
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Feb 25, 2015 01:41
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The joke was on me! Turns out the shithead in the call center never actually submitted a dispatch order, so I sat around all morning for nothing. I love life and everything in it. I called their support, got someone who sounded like their soul hadn't left their body, they arranged a "high priority dispatch", but no time was selected so I just left. 3 hours later I get a call saying our VPN is up, so I guess while I was driving home and out of cell service someone showed up. gently caress it don't care. CenturyLink support 
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Feb 25, 2015 02:10
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skooma512 posted:I had a user email me on Saturday that he needs his reimaged laptop "FIRST THING" Monday morning. "Requests need to be given 2 business days in advance. Therefore, your laptop will be ready first thing Monday morning. Next Monday.
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Feb 25, 2015 02:47
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CitizenKain posted:The joke was on me! Turns out the shithead in the call center never actually submitted a dispatch order, so I sat around all morning for nothing. I love life and everything in it. Something a coworker made after the Savvis/CenturyLink TCAM exhaustion that basically left us invisible to half the internet for over a day with no communication: 
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Feb 25, 2015 05:30
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Storysmith posted:Something a coworker made after the Savvis/CenturyLink TCAM exhaustion that basically left us invisible to half the internet for over a day with no communication: A buddy of mine worked for Savvis back in the early eighties and tried to get me in as a consultant. Apparently using a bash script to format DNS records was some kind of scary voodoo evil magic. I got a nice coffee mug out of the pitch meeting though.
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Feb 25, 2015 06:15
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KillHour posted:"Requests need to be given 2 business days in advance. Therefore, your laptop will be ready first thing Monday morning. Next Monday. Yeah stop caving to unreasonable poo poo.
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Feb 25, 2015 07:01
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CitizenKain posted:The joke was on me! Turns out the shithead in the call center never actually submitted a dispatch order, so I sat around all morning for nothing. I love life and everything in it. This is why I hated working for ISP support. You'd get a customer who got hosed, then we'd write a ticket to dispatch, and dispatch is basically "lol gently caress you no". Then we'd escalate, and their "manager" is like "lol gently caress you now we're busy fuckoff". Then you get to get screamed at by a customer about how you're a terrible person because you can't unfuck the poo poo this soulless corporation has hosed with it's politics. Then they run the techs ragged, then wonder why busy places like NYC and Raleigh are two to three weeks out on tech support. Business class was only slightly less hosed.
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Feb 25, 2015 14:43
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Potato Salad posted:Do you guys have a means by which to review / back-up your teammates? Our manager selectively filters ticket survey responses when we do our yearly review to remove ones like this. He isn't going to let a response like this, in which they gave all 1's and flat out said that the technician was incompetent, impact our rating that gets reported to upper management. I went through the ticket chain and every thing he said was correct, too. She just was so belligerent and angry that it didn't matter -- we are the vendor, therefore we should magically fix it. These kinds of tickets are very rare and I think this is one of the few times we've encountered a true "End User". Most of the time the IT department coordinates us working with them, or the person we've trained on the product.
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Feb 25, 2015 16:49
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I had a long conversation with a user today that kept referring to the Ctrl and Alt keys as "central" and "alta". I tried to drop the words "control" and "alt" into the conversation as much as possible to see if she would catch on, but she just kept saying it. This is the same woman who always says "Crisco" instead of "Cisco". It's almost like she's just messing with me, but I know she's not.
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Feb 25, 2015 20:13
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wa27 posted:I had a long conversation with a user today that kept referring to the Ctrl and Alt keys as "central" and "alta". I tried to drop the words "control" and "alt" into the conversation as much as possible to see if she would catch on, but she just kept saying it. I have one of those. Instead of "Fiscal," it's "Physical." There was a guy that worked in our department named Geraldo, who was always "Gerardo." In a trait seemingly shared by literally everyone over 40, "Firefox" became "Foxfire". The first one annoyed my boss so much that she (boss) actually sat her (serial english murderer) down and tried to get her to actually say fiscal. It was like talking to a small child.
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Feb 25, 2015 20:50
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Linskys.
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Feb 25, 2015 20:57
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Inspector_666 posted:Linskys. Linkybits
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Feb 25, 2015 21:01
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Anti-Norton Virus Nantando The Google (pronounced Jew-gol, my personal favorite comedy mispronunciation)
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Feb 25, 2015 21:20
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UBS ports
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Feb 25, 2015 21:23
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Inspector_666 posted:Linskys. Linksky - the Polish networking company
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Feb 25, 2015 21:41
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