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BonoMan posted:Oh man speaking of all of that. At 3 and a half we're now firmly beginning the "why?" phase. Before you have kids you always think "oh that's gonna be amazing I'M GOING TO TEACH THEM SO MANY THINGS!" Yeah man, when he was little and could only cry I couldn't wait for him to start talking and asking questions. I always felt sorry for kids whose parents seemed to ignore their questions when I saw them in supermarkets etc. Now I'm the one worn down after 50 variations of the same basically unanswerable question that day.
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Feb 23, 2018 23:18
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Reminds me of an interaction with my 3 year old daughter the other day that stumped me. Me: Don't take toys away from your brother when he's playing with them. Her: Why? Me: Because you need to share. Her: Why? Me: Because sharing is the nice thing to do. Her: ...but I'm mean.
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Feb 23, 2018 23:28
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I love looking at "When you tell your kids to hurry" memes
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Feb 24, 2018 00:30
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BonoMan posted:Oh man speaking of all of that. At 3 and a half we're now firmly beginning the "why?" phase. Before you have kids you always think "oh that's gonna be amazing I'M GOING TO TEACH THEM SO MANY THINGS!" My son is soon to be 2 and a half and is starting that phase way early (he's a huge talker... That's all he does really) He's not old enough to go into an endless spiral of whys, but he will ask the same "why" 10 times a day for a week straight
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Feb 24, 2018 01:43
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Doc told us a couple of hours ago that our little guy likely has a GI virus. Any hot tips for the next couple of days? I'm basically  at this point.
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Feb 24, 2018 04:41
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CerealCrunch posted:Reminds me of an interaction with my 3 year old daughter the other day that stumped me. Hey kiddo, when you did x you made mam and me sad. But I'm happy! You're happy because you made us sad? Yep  Kids are awful.
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Feb 24, 2018 09:24
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Alterian posted:I love looking at "When you tell your kids to hurry" memes I love the Mary poppins/batman voice one. It’s so apt
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Feb 24, 2018 14:14
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Whoever cursed me in their head when reading that we were six months in with no sleep issues .... congratulations! We are two nights in a row of 2 hour wake n' cry intervals! As an added bonus my back has been acting up this week so yay! The extra bend and lifts are really helping 
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Feb 25, 2018 02:38
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It's ok, just breathe and remember: This too shall pass (And thou shalt experience it again in the form of the eight month sleep regression) Which too shall pass
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Feb 25, 2018 03:25
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Leng posted:It's ok, just breathe and remember: I'm not worried or stressed I just thought it was funny on the timing I know it'll go by in a blink and we'll be on to some other challenge (like getting her to drink enough now that she's also on solids).
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Feb 25, 2018 04:37
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The first rule of Good Kid Sleep Club: Don't Talk About Good Kid Sleep.
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Feb 25, 2018 16:41
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and the first rule of Bad Kid Sleep Club: it’ll only last as long as it takes to break your spirit.
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Feb 25, 2018 17:57
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Sleep regression is one thing, right now we're dealing with our first stomach bug for our 8 month old. Puke and diarrhea everywhere! Also, no sleep, and constant cuddles or you have a meltdown! So much for the weekend. I took off last week to de-stress from work overload, and the last three days have pretty much wiped that out. I guess, good news is I'll have to take another day off if he's still sick tomorrow... Edit: also, I'm like 60% I'm now coming down with whatever he has. LogisticEarth fucked around with this message at 01:31 on Feb 26, 2018 |
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Feb 26, 2018 01:28
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Thwomp posted:and the first rule of Bad Kid Sleep Club: it’ll only last as long as it takes to break your spirit. that's my secret, Cap
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Feb 26, 2018 16:50
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Alright, I've been lurking this thread long enough, it's time to face reality: I'm going to be a dad soon. We're expecting a girl in May and I can't recall a time in my life where I've been happier, but of course, I'm terrified. It's been awesome... and of course, terrifying reading this thread. I look forward to turning to goons, as I have through most of my adulthood, for advice on the most important parts of my life. Until then, though, I do have a question. I saw some cursory book recommendations floating around in the first few pages but that was nearly six years ago. Is there any sort of consensus here on good books for first-time parents? I'm guessing some of the older books are good, but if anything new/groundbreaking has caught anyone's eye, I'd like to hear about it. We do have a baby signing book because I'm super interested in getting in on that. So, I'm mostly interested in a "things I wish I'd known" type of book. I know that nothing can really prepare me for this, but if for no other reason than build up my courage a little, I'd like to read some stuff. Chili fucked around with this message at 07:22 on Feb 27, 2018 |
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Feb 27, 2018 07:10
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I don't know that I've seen much of a consensus here on any book recommendations. Books are as various as parenting styles and none fit all. I'm personally a fan of Armin A. Brott's New Father series. It does a good job breaking down a child's growth month to month and "typical" fatherhood concerns. The one issue I have is that he focuses a bit on the leading edge of developmental milestones (mostly to get you mentally prepared for something coming soon), which at first made me worry that my daughter was behind when she really wasn't. His Expectant Father book is pretty good at helping a dad understand what his partner is going through during pregnancy, too.
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Feb 27, 2018 14:23
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sebzilla posted:Hey kiddo, when you did x you made mam and me sad. Got another one today: Me: *singing* Someone's in the kitchen with Dinah, Someo- Her: Stop! I don't like that! Me: You don't like what? Her: ...I don't like you
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Feb 27, 2018 15:23
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Chili posted:Alright, I've been lurking this thread long enough, it's time to face reality: I'm going to be a dad soon. We're expecting a girl in May and I can't recall a time in my life where I've been happier, but of course, I'm terrified. "Everyone has a plan 'till they get punched in the mouth." I'm going to let the hive mind jump in here. Only book I actively recommend is "happiest baby on the block", but someone will buy that for you and give it to you. Its terribly written, but just DO WHAT IT SAYS. DO NOT THINK. Go on Youtube if you need examples on the swinging and shushing. It'll keep your family alive for the first few months. Other people in this thread are going to recommend a ton of books, my advice is to remember a few things: One, people have been having babies for a long time, including very bad terrible dumb parents and their kids turn out fine. You're probably not going to gently caress it up that bad, books or not, just because you're trying. Two, they're only babies for what feels like, in the moment, forever, but in retrospect for like one year. Those stages and whatnot go by so very quickly, but the way many books are written act like you have 3 months to work with a baby on how to do X or Y, when they only are in that window for a week or two at most. Then it is figured out and they're on to the next thing. Third, for some loving reason when you're having a kid everyone wants to tell you about birth and not taking care of kids. I suspect from a time-before when everyone had little kids around all the time but nobody knew about child birth. Guess what, you only do that ONCE with a kid, and you don't really have that much control over it. Focus on learning how to deal with a child, that'll be the reality of 18 years vs. the activity of at most 18 hours. (My stupid hospital offered two new parent classes, a 4 week birth class and a 1 week child care class. gently caress them, that is very, very backwards.). Forth, accept all help and food. Adopt an improv mindset of "Yes, and?" when people offer you poo poo. Make in-laws help with cleaning, cooking, and yes, child care. If they're offering then TAKE IT. Nobody wins an award for killing themselves trying to do everything themselves. Plus, most of those people will disappear after the third month, so use them while they're around. And finally, try to be somewhat rational about what you spend funds on. A bajillion dollar crib sleeps the same as a cheap one. An expensive bottle cleaner or set won't get used past the first year. However, a nice diaper pail will pay dividends for at least 2 years. They grow out of clothing before it is worn, so DO NOT buy a bunch of clothing "ahead of time", you'll be off season and size without them ever putting it on. Think Just-in-time inventory management.
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Feb 27, 2018 15:42
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I honestly didn't read any of the few books I bought.
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Feb 27, 2018 16:17
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I never bought or read any books, but I did (and still do!) a whole lot of googling
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Feb 27, 2018 16:41
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Four month mark. Nap time is suddenly hell, in red faced baby form. Any tips for a tired dad?
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Feb 27, 2018 17:05
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Bardeh posted:I never bought or read any books, but I did (and still do!) a whole lot of googling virinvictus posted:Four month mark. Nap time is suddenly hell, in red faced baby form. Any tips for a tired dad? I read a few books, maybe some of it stuck, maybe it didn't. I don't remember - it was a blur of 4 months for me. We winged half of it, made do with the rest. You don't think straight with little sleep, just don't blame the little guy/girl for it. I can see how people get angry when they are running on very very little sleep - if you get angry/walk away/swap out/support each other. It does get better!
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Feb 27, 2018 17:22
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Thanks for the advice and recommendations so far. I'm not silly. I know that pretty much whatever I do/read before all of this gets going will pretty much take a backseat really loving quickly once she arrives. This will most likely benefit me most right now, while I'm feeling anxious about what's to come. The New Father book does indeed look up my alley, so I'm grabbing it and will have it handy just in case. In the meantime, my wife is pregnant as hell and is dealing with so many awful symptoms. She's tiny, and our baby decided that being in the 98th percentile for size would be a swell idea. So between supporting her and just doing all that I can to prepare, I've got my hands plenty full. Putting together a nursery is loving fun as hell though, so at least I'm enjoying that.
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Feb 27, 2018 19:07
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Now practice using baby carriers with Butterscotch as the practice baby
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Feb 27, 2018 19:37
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Good luck new dad. If you’ve lurked here long enough you’ll have realised we’re all just getting by, we’re learning every day and that you’ll get things wrong. Enjoy the tiny baby stage. Don’t wish your life away to when they can walk or talk. The first 3 months are the hardest, then it starts getting better. I hear it’s great when they move out.
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Feb 27, 2018 20:07
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JustAurora posted:Now practice using baby carriers with Butterscotch as the practice baby Haha I was worried my butterscotch history would follow me here. Keeping him from smothering her is probably one of the things I'm most anxious about. Gonna have to be super vigilant. It'll be worth it though, cos it'll be cute when she's wrestling around with him when she's a toddler. But yes, he would love that.
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Feb 27, 2018 21:01
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These are more applicable to toddlers but I really enjoyed How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen, and No Bad Kids. They're less about burping/sleeping/feeding and more about getting into a baby's mindset and how to treat them like real people. Some of it is a little hokey but I've found that Acknowledging Feelings is strangely powerful with my 2 year old.
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Feb 27, 2018 21:09
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Usually animals avoid infants until they are able to drop delicious people food on the floor. I had these awful dreams of my dog turning my baby's face into hamburger meat, but in reality he kept a safe distance until she started feeding him her snacks.
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Feb 27, 2018 21:18
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JustAurora posted:Usually animals avoid infants until they are able to drop delicious people food on the floor. I had these awful dreams of my dog turning my baby's face into hamburger meat, but in reality he kept a safe distance until she started feeding him her snacks. Our orange rear end in a top hat (read: Cat) will tolerate our 2 year old and has been generally good around him. We've had a couple of incidents when our boy was younger but nothing too terrible.
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Feb 27, 2018 21:28
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In general, How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (maybe reverse that?) is a good book with lots of good advice. Not just for parents, to be honest. The skills from that book will help in all of your interactions.
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Feb 27, 2018 21:52
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JustAurora posted:Usually animals avoid infants until they are able to drop delicious people food on the floor. I had these awful dreams of my dog turning my baby's face into hamburger meat, but in reality he kept a safe distance until she started feeding him her snacks. Problem with this is that butterscotch superglues himself to heat sources. Could totally see him thinking that a baby is his new bed. Also I've heard that milky, baby mouths can attract cattention.
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Feb 27, 2018 22:07
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The other main thing to what people are saying is also to just try and be adaptable. You'll hear stories of other people's great babies who slept through the night starting at week 4 through six months. You'll hear stories of nightmare children who never got past the colicky phase and were awful through 12 months. You'll be told driving/rocking/singing/biking/harnessing/skydiving is the best way to get your child to sleep. You'll be told all of these things and more, not just about sleep but about food, clothing, treating illness, and a million other things. But it doesn't matter. Your child is yours and, just like everyone else, is an individual. You'll ride rocky waves and experience bliss. Do what works for your family, drat whatever the outside world says. It'll all be okay and no matter what your family does/your baby puts you through, they'll turn out alright 18 years later as slightly damaged adults just like everyone else.
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Feb 27, 2018 22:13
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Hi_Bears posted:These are more applicable to toddlers but I really enjoyed How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen, and No Bad Kids. They're less about burping/sleeping/feeding and more about getting into a baby's mindset and how to treat them like real people. Some of it is a little hokey but I've found that Acknowledging Feelings is strangely powerful with my 2 year old. Axiem posted:In general, How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (maybe reverse that?) is a good book with lots of good advice. Yeah, I'm sure books like that are helpful. Fortunately, I'm a shrink, and the majority of my education was focused on stuff like that. Not saying that I think I'M ALL READY TO GO, or that I'm above books like that, but, my main concern is more on the technical, nuts and bolts of things that might happen. Like learning about the 4 month sleep regression. I'm so glad that I now know that's even a thing that can happen with some regularity. Like, hey, what if she takes a massive purple poo poo? No worries, that just means ..... That kind of stuff. And sure, the internet is definitely ripe for quick checks but prepping ahead of time can bring in some reduction of stress. But of course, I know that: Thwomp posted:The other main thing to what people are saying is also to just try and be adaptable. Holds true, and that I shouldn't expect every single thing that I read about to happen exactly when it should and all that. So yeah, maybe I don't need a book. v  v
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Feb 28, 2018 04:09
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For nuts and bolts, if you know other parents, just find the pediatrician who gets wide-eyed recommendations from people, and use them and their staff. They're really the only people who see hojillions of newborns (and stressed-out parents), so they really have seen it all. You'll be seeing them at a pretty regular cadence in the first year, so you get plenty of Q&A time. It needs to be a provider that "gets" you, though, from a mindset standpoint.
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Feb 28, 2018 13:18
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My kids hate minions, they like watching music videos and whenever the one with the minions and despicable me stuff comes on they scream at me to change it. Thank god.
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Feb 28, 2018 14:09
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virinvictus posted:Four month mark. Nap time is suddenly hell, in red faced baby form. Any tips for a tired dad? Lots of snuggling. White noise. My son responded to music videos really well. I feel it coming and Starboy by the weekend, Shape of you by Ed Sheehan, Bruno mars....
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Feb 28, 2018 16:29
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Amazon is running a car seat sale including normals, convertibles, and base+carrier from Britax here. If that helps anyone. Picking up how to talk so kids won't listen based on this thread. Had an hour long 2 year old tantrum about getting dressed and brushing teeth. Something we do every single morning.
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Feb 28, 2018 16:30
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Both my son and I are home sick today. Tangentially, we just watched an hour of Bruder toy videos.
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Feb 28, 2018 18:45
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The Fool posted:Both my son and I are home sick today. That sounds dope as hell. I love Bruder.
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Feb 28, 2018 19:10
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umbrage posted:For nuts and bolts, if you know other parents, just find the pediatrician who gets wide-eyed recommendations from people, and use them and their staff. They're really the only people who see hojillions of newborns (and stressed-out parents), so they really have seen it all. You'll be seeing them at a pretty regular cadence in the first year, so you get plenty of Q&A time. It needs to be a provider that "gets" you, though, from a mindset standpoint. In addition to this, ours has a 24 hour nurse line where you can call whenever and speak to a nurse. I'd highly recommend something similar.
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Feb 28, 2018 19:27
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