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Eat My Fuc
May 29, 2007

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.

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forkboy84
Jun 13, 2012

Corgis love bread. And Puro


oh but seriously I posted:

I love Tilda, despite my better judgement.



My closest brush with fame is Tilda is good friends with one of the few of my dad's school friends he keeps in contact with and she's extremely nice as well as being very talented. And she has that real star quality, she'd met my dad one time, he and my mam got invited to some movie screening at her house and she was all "Kenny, it's lovely to see you again" and that sort of thing. Just a way for making everyone seem important even when they are my old man.

She isn't from this part of the world but she's done a lot with bringing a mobile cinema around this rural part of Scotland and so on. Also a socialist.

Dangerous Person
Apr 4, 2011

Not dead yet

Eat My Fuc posted:

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.


I think you're good with the first Raid movie

WatermelonGun
May 7, 2009

Eat My Fuc posted:

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.

the raid
dredd
die hard (there’s like one second of titty but it’s not in a bikini or a strip club so it fits your stipulation)
meals on wheels
police story
predator

there’s more but that’s six movies right there watch those first then you can have additional movies

Dimebags Brain
Feb 18, 2013





Eat My Fuc posted:

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.

The Raid and Police Story

Trying
Sep 26, 2019

forkboy84 posted:

My closest brush with fame is Tilda is good friends with one of the few of my dad's school friends he keeps in contact with and she's extremely nice as well as being very talented. And she has that real star quality, she'd met my dad one time, he and my mam got invited to some movie screening at her house and she was all "Kenny, it's lovely to see you again" and that sort of thing. Just a way for making everyone seem important even when they are my old man.

She isn't from this part of the world but she's done a lot with bringing a mobile cinema around this rural part of Scotland and so on. Also a socialist.

I worry she's a bit bougie but I cannot help it she is extremely my poo poo. Julia might be my favourite movie of all time.

Bluedeanie
Jul 20, 2008

It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?



I don't recall any fuckin in Sudden Death, the greatest hockey film of all time

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Was it Tilda Swinton who did a roving art installation piece where she'd just climb into a big clear box and go to sleep, and you could come to the gallery and watch her sleep? Because if so I love (even more) Tilda Swinton.

CarlCX
Dec 14, 2003

WatermelonGun posted:

the raid
dredd
die hard (there’s like one second of titty but it’s not in a bikini or a strip club so it fits your stipulation)
meals on wheels
police story
predator

there’s more but that’s six movies right there watch those first then you can have additional movies

Dredd has that whole psychic rape thing so while I love Dredd I dunno that it counts

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

KISS ME KRIS

Lamuella posted:

Best Punisher is Jon Bernthal in season 2 of Daredevil only. They kind of screw the pooch with the Punisher standalone series but he absolutely captures the "this is a war that ends when I die" concept super hard in Darevevil.

I liked the standalone Punisher stuff because it did exactly what Punisher's supposed to do: war is terrible and what it does to people ought to be a crime.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Predator is all about Bill Duke and Jesse Ventura's smoldering love for each other and needs to be recognized as a great love story of our time. :colbert:

Trying
Sep 26, 2019

Jerusalem posted:

Was it Tilda Swinton who did a roving art installation piece where she'd just climb into a big clear box and go to sleep, and you could come to the gallery and watch her sleep? Because if so I love (even more) Tilda Swinton.

Yes, she is extremely good.

Eat My Fuc
May 29, 2007

Appreciate the recommendations. How's the John Wick series in terms of sex/nudity? I'm interested in the films but gotta be considerate of my party.

Trying
Sep 26, 2019

Eat My Fuc posted:

Appreciate the recommendations. How's the John Wick series in terms of sex/nudity? I'm interested in the films but gotta be considerate of my party.

Violent as poo poo but Keanu has strong vocel energy.

TTBF
Sep 14, 2005



Does The Dog Die (dot com) contains a list of basically everything objectionable for each movie, and you can scroll down and see yourself. It looks like part 2 has an upper half of a butt in one scene but that's it for anything resembling sexual content.

e: Try BKO: Bangkok Knock Out. It's a Thai martial arts film made by a stuntment about a team of Thai stuntmen who get put in a Dangerous Game situation. There's no sex or titillation. Just some good old fashioned ultra violence and lax safety laws.

TTBF fucked around with this message at 02:09 on Apr 8, 2020

Jiro
Jan 13, 2004

Eat My Fuc posted:

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.

The first 3 Rambo movies, no Steven Segal movie ever, Kickboxer, Bloodsport, Chocolate, Ong Bak, the Boyka movies of Undisputed, all the John Wick movies, Hard Boiled, Pray for Death, Kill Crazy, Sudden Death, Fast and Furious 4-7

You're totally right J-ru neeeeeever mind on that.

Jiro fucked around with this message at 02:09 on Apr 8, 2020

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

The Fast and Furious movies are absolutely packed with male gaze bullshit though, a metric shitton of slow-mo footage of girls in miniskirts and thongs walking or women in bikinis emerging out of water in slow-mo.

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010
Fist of Legend.

Eat My Fuc
May 29, 2007

Jerusalem posted:

The Fast and Furious movies are absolutely packed with male gaze bullshit though, a metric shitton of slow-mo footage of girls in miniskirts and thongs walking or women in bikinis emerging out of water in slow-mo.

Yea even that would be a little over the line in this situation but that does the dog die website was a great suggestion thanks TTBF.

Awesome suggestions everyone thanks, this is a great place for movie suggestions oddly enough, some diverse and good tastes.

Eat My Fuc fucked around with this message at 02:18 on Apr 8, 2020

Jiro
Jan 13, 2004

El Gallinero Gros posted:

Fist of Legend.

OOOH, Tai Chi Zero, Tai Chi Hero, Kung Fu Hustle, Shaolin Soccer, Legend of Drunken Master II, The Legend I - II, Iron Monkey, The Grandmaster, Ip Man 1-3

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

KungFu Hustle is so loving great :hai:

Shard
Jul 30, 2005

Eat My Fuc posted:

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.

John Wick 2 and 3. Matrix 1 and 3. Hot fuzz. 13 assassins

Jiro
Jan 13, 2004

Shard posted:

John Wick 2 and 3. Matrix 1 and 3. Hot fuzz. 13 assassins

I thought 13 Assassins would be a no go due to the whole mutilation reveal scene.

Can't believe I forgot about Hot Fuzz, and The Matrix. OHHHH Gross Pointe Blank!

Trying
Sep 26, 2019

Jiro posted:

OHHHH Gross Pointe Blank!

This person gets it.

Shard
Jul 30, 2005

Jiro posted:

I thought 13 Assassins would be a no go due to the whole mutilation reveal scene.

Can't believe I forgot about Hot Fuzz, and The Matrix. OHHHH Gross Pointe Blank!

Darn forgot about that part. Then what about captain America winter soldier. Mad max fury road or Logan. Shin godzilla and godzilla future wars

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Jiro posted:

OHHHH Gross Pointe Blank!

gently caress I haven't watched this movie in years, yeah it's really good.

Captain Magic
Apr 4, 2005

Yes, we have feathers--but the muscles of men.

Eat My Fuc posted:

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.

Indiana Jones (first 3)
Star Trek (follow the Evens Good/Odds bad rule and include Galaxy Quest)
Jaws
3:10 to Yuma
Batman (1989)
Big Trouble in Little China
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Clash of the Titans (either one is good)
Dirty Dozen
Duel
Fifth Element (? I don’t think has boobs; idk what your bikini standard is and if Jovavich in her thing counts)
Forbidden Kingdom (shut up I like it okay)
Kung Fu Panda
Men in Black
Mission Impossible 1, 3, GP, and Fallout
The Princess Bride
First Blood
Reign of Fire
Stardust
Terminator 2 (? I don’t think there’s boobs)
True Lies
The Warriors (though I guess there is a brothel scene but I don’t think there’s nudity)

Okay that’s it that’s my list

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Captain Magic posted:

Terminator 2 (? I don’t think there’s boobs)

During the climax (no pun intended) the T1000 runs through a series of previous identities and there's a flash of nudity, though you'd have to be pretty hard up to find it arousing.

That said, the scene where the orderly thinks Sarah Connor is comatose is super loving creepy and uncomfortable to watch.

Captain Magic
Apr 4, 2005

Yes, we have feathers--but the muscles of men.

Jerusalem posted:

During the climax (no pun intended) the T1000 runs through a series of previous identities and there's a flash of nudity, though you'd have to be pretty hard up to find it arousing.

That said, the scene where the orderly thinks Sarah Connor is comatose is super loving creepy and uncomfortable to watch.

I forgot about both of those!

Kvantum
Feb 5, 2006
Skee-entist

Captain Magic posted:


Fifth Element (? I don’t think has boobs; idk what your bikini standard is and if Jovavich in her thing counts)


Mila is nude initially before they apply the bandages to her. It's brief, but if the audience is going to flip out over any nudity then it's a no-go.

Beef Jerky Robot
Sep 20, 2009

"And the DICK?"

Arnold punches through a guys torso in Terminator but you can see his wangus so it’s an evil film

CobiWann
Oct 21, 2009

Have fun!
Red is also a good pick.

mariooncrack
Dec 27, 2008

Eat My Fuc posted:

Can anyone recommend some good action movies without sex scenes, or bikini’s/strip clubs in them.

The 36th Chamber of Shaolin
Five Deadly Venoms

Jiro posted:

The first 3 Rambo movies, no Steven Segal movie ever, Kickboxer, Bloodsport, Chocolate, Ong Bak, the Boyka movies of Undisputed, all the John Wick movies, Hard Boiled, Pray for Death, Kill Crazy, Sudden Death, Fast and Furious 4-7

You're totally right J-ru neeeeeever mind on that.

Doesn't Bloodsport have an odd sex scene between Van Damme and the reporter?

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

mariooncrack posted:

The 36th Chamber of Shaolin

Hell yes, this movie is loving awesome.

Artelier
Jan 23, 2015


Mad Max Fury Road definitely has scantily clad people but it's shot in a very not-male gaze-y way and the women have a lot of agency, maybe it counts? Excellent action film all round really.

EDIT: Someone already said Mad Max! Still great. Also I saw True Lies in the list but iirc there's a scene where Arnold coerces his wife to do a striptease or something for him? I might be thinking of the wrong Arnold film...

Artelier fucked around with this message at 04:09 on Apr 8, 2020

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Yeah, in True Lies he tricks his wife into thinking she's been tasked to plant a listening device in the room of a bad guy (himself in the shadows, using a tape recorded voice) and he makes her dance in her underwear for him.

TV Zombie
Sep 6, 2011

Burying all the trauma from past nights
Burying my anger in the past


Karl Urban's version did have something like a sex scene in it.

Man, I love Urban as Judge Dredd. I wish they made another one with him in it.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

It makes me so sad that movie was a financial bomb, it was so loving good.

Orange Carlisle
Jul 14, 2007

Jerusalem posted:

KungFu Hustle is so loving great :hai:

One of the best movies ever

I usually rewatch that and Shaolin Soccer about once a year. It's sad that the rumored Kung Fu Hustle 2 never got made. As of January 2020 Stephen Chow is still saying the sequel will be a thing but he's been saying that since the first one came out.

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Captain Magic
Apr 4, 2005

Yes, we have feathers--but the muscles of men.
Listen apparently I just zone out during a lot of the nudity or stripping times in movies, what can I say

Watch True Lies if you’re not restrained by puritans, it’s good

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