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The Recliners aren't so different, from you and I. They think, and love, and live. They have come to us in peace-" the mad preacher's words were cut off mid stream, by a brutal and unexpected attack from behind. The red La-Z-Boy that took his life was one of the most fearsome that Patrick had ever seen. He was glad he'd brought his Colt CZ P38, the cold steel a warm welcome in his hands
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Dec 19, 2020 23:56
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"Soft chair! Soft chair! It's softer than you think, Dad! Softer than you think!"
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Dec 20, 2020 00:01
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Recliner, Recliner and Easy Chair, Second Recliner
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Dec 20, 2020 00:03
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There Will Come Soft Chairs
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Dec 20, 2020 00:07
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Cushioned on the butt by the gay recliner?
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Dec 20, 2020 00:10
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I am a great soft velvet thing. Smoothly rounded, with no corners, with deep black burns filled by soot where cigarettes landed. Rubbery appendages that were once my arms; bulks rounding down into legless humps of soft slippery matter. I leave a moist trail when I move, grease trickled down in the shape of my shadow. Blotches of diseased, evil stain come and go on my surface, as though half-digested pepperoni surfaces from within. Outwardly: dumbly, I incline in place, a thing that could never have been known as upright, a thing whose shape is so alien a travesty that humanity becomes more obscene at the first kiss of asscheek to cover. Inwardly: alone. Here. Living under the lamp, under the water stains, in the belly of this house, whom we obtained because our money was badly spent and we must have known unconsciously that we could not do better. I have no knob. And I must lean.
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Dec 20, 2020 00:12
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TheAardvark posted:The Recliners aren't so different, from you and I. They think, and love, and live. They have come to us in peace-" the mad preacher's words were cut off mid stream, by a brutal and unexpected attack from behind. The red La-Z-Boy that took his life was one of the most fearsome that Patrick had ever seen. He was glad he'd brought his Colt CZ P38, the cold steel a warm welcome in his hands Which branch(es) of the military did Patrick serve in and how did his wife and kids die?
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Dec 20, 2020 00:35
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General Battuta posted:There Will Come Soft Chairs  The Book of the New Sun-Lounger The Last and First Ottoman The La-Z-Boy of Heaven
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Dec 20, 2020 00:39
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No. No more dancing! posted:Which branch(es) of the military did Patrick serve in and how did his wife and kids die? It was obviously the Chair Force?
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Dec 20, 2020 00:41
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General Battuta posted:It was obviously the Chair Force? I didn't want to rule out the possibility of him being a SOFA marine.
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Dec 20, 2020 00:53
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Listen, and understand! That recliner is out there. It can't be bargained with, it can't be reasoned with! It doesn't feel pity, or remorse or fear! And it absolutely will not stop - ever! - until you are comfortable!
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Dec 20, 2020 00:56
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wizzardstaff posted:"Soft chair! Soft chair! It's softer than you think, Dad! Softer than you think!" also lmbo
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Dec 20, 2020 01:04
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No one would have believed in the first years of the twenty-first century that this house was being watched keenly and closely by intelligences greater than man's and yet as mortal as his own; that as men busied themselves about their various concerns they were scrutinised and studied, perhaps almost as narrowly as a man with a microscope might scrutinise the transient creatures that swarm and multiply in a drop of water. With infinite complacency men went to and fro over this globe about their little affairs, serene in their assurance of their empire over furniture. It is possible that the infusoria under the microscope do the same. No one gave a thought to the older worlds of Homebase as sources of human danger, or thought of them only to dismiss the idea of recliners within them as impossible or improbable. It is curious to recall some of the mental habits of those departed days. At most terrestrial men fancied there might be three-piece suites within IKEA, perhaps inferior to themselves and ready to welcome a missionary enterprise. Yet across the gulf of the M25, minds that are to our minds as ours are to those of the beasts that perish, intellects vast and cool and unsympathetic, regarded this living room with envious eyes, and slowly and surely drew their plans against us.
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Dec 20, 2020 01:12
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God bless my autocorrect these are beautiful
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Dec 20, 2020 01:13
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Don't forget...you are not legally liable for any crimes your washing machine goes out and commits, unless you programmed it to do so. readers of Stanislaw Lem should get that reference
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Dec 20, 2020 06:49
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I have no recliner puns but I'm just gonna say that I sit in my apartment on a 10-year-old corduroy couch that a former housemate purchased while high, which has completely blown out over the years, has ruptured cushion material surging through the fabric, has all manner of stains, and I'm a moneyed adult who could afford to replace it, yet I keep it, because... ...it reclines
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Dec 20, 2020 14:42
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The upholstery over the stuffing was the color of a television tuned to a dead channel.
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Dec 20, 2020 15:56
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Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering chair; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell’s heart I slouch at thee; for hate’s sake I rest my rear end upon thee. Sink all cushions and all blankets to one common nap! and since neither can be mine, let me then doze to pieces, while still using thee, though tied to thee, thou damned chair! Thus, I put up my feet!
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Dec 20, 2020 19:54
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I must not recline. Reclining is the spine-killer. Reclining is the little-death that brings total lower back pain. I will sit up straight. I will permit my butt to go numb. And when I stand up I will turn the inner eye and see my posture. Where the comfort has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
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Dec 20, 2020 20:23
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"In three years, the pillow will be obsolete," said the recliner.
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Dec 20, 2020 20:33
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"Recline, Harlequin!" Said the Sofasalesman.
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Dec 20, 2020 20:36
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The City We Became (Great Cities #1) by NK Jemisin - $4.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07MFKQDJM/ Skyward by Brandon Sanderson - $1.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07BJLB5LY/ YA
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Dec 20, 2020 23:01
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What’s the recommended David Drake book to read next? Just finished!
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Dec 20, 2020 23:34
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tildes posted:What’s the recommended David Drake book to read next? Just finished! Have you read any of his Hammer's Slammers stuff?
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Dec 20, 2020 23:45
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Have you Slammered his Hammer?
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Dec 21, 2020 00:06
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I want to make a joke about Blade Sitters identifying Recliners using the Voight-Kampfy Chair Test, but that was the movie.
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Dec 21, 2020 00:14
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On a previous page someone was asking if KJ Parker had any more books like Academic Exercises. He has a new story in the same vein that was published online recently which I happened on by chance. Not quite as good as the ones in Academic Exercises though, or maybe its just the difference of reading a story on a phone vs kindle. I wish he’d do a bit more with this setting though. Great premise but they start to be too similar. http://www.beneath-ceaseless-skies.com/stories/many-mansions/
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Dec 21, 2020 00:34
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Ccs posted:On a previous page someone was asking if KJ Parker had any more books like Academic Exercises. He has a new story in the same vein that was published online recently which I happened on by chance. Not quite as good as the ones in Academic Exercises though, or maybe its just the difference of reading a story on a phone vs kindle. That was me -- thanks for the heads up.
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Dec 21, 2020 00:42
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Mere words cannot express the joy the last couple of pages have brought to me. “In temperate countries, where man had succeeded in putting most forms of furniture save his own under a reasonable degree of restraint, the status of the recliner was thus made quite clear. But in the tropics, particularly in the dense forest areas, they quickly became a scourge.”
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Dec 21, 2020 07:49
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StrixNebulosa posted:Ah, yes, I think I remember that detail! One moment - Holy crap, thanks! I have had that bit stuck in my head for years!
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Dec 21, 2020 09:22
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General Battuta posted:What if recliners, but too much? That's how you make a sci fi plot. That's pretty much what happened to humanity in WALL-E.
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Dec 21, 2020 15:08
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I mean, I read that when I was like nine. Is that not the typical age for being able to stomach Asimov's cardboard characters because you're hooked on the worldbuilding?
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Dec 21, 2020 19:09
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grassy gnoll posted:The upholstery over the stuffing was the color of a television tuned to a dead channel. Blue
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Dec 21, 2020 19:13
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The Magician's Land (The Magicians #3) by Lev Grossman - $1.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00G3L19CI/ The Red Knight (Traitor Son #1) by Miles Cameron - $2.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B007ZFPUL2/
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Dec 21, 2020 19:24
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DACK FAYDEN posted:I mean, I read that when I was like nine. Is that not the typical age for being able to stomach Asimov's cardboard characters because you're hooked on the worldbuilding? That tracks. My grandmother got me a collected edition of Foundation, Foundation and Empire, and Second Foundation as a birthday present when I was ten.
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Dec 21, 2020 20:19
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Took a little sanity break however I'm still chugging along on my SFL Archives readthrough project. 1991 hasn't had as many meta-amusing moments as 1990 did(1990 had SFLer's wondering if Glen Cooks pornographic novel is stocked in Glen Cooks vendor stall at conventions & the jealous rage of every single SFL author when Piers Anthony launched a 1-800 number), however "slow glass" story discussion cropping up again after about 11 years/SFL VOL 01 is very on-point to the entire "slow glass" scifi concept. === Sanity break was spent reading Daniel Keys Moran's CONTINUING TIME stories SFLer's have been raving about for 3-ish years now. The CONTINUING TIME series overall had a fresh non-WilliamGibson cyberpunk influenced feel which mostly aged well, however the many instances of Robert Heinlein/Spider Robinson grown person banging jailbait/perfect genetics/cousin-genetic_clone f****ng stuff did not age well. The first book (EMERALD EYES) was ok-to-good, 2nd book (THE LONG RUN) was ehh with a Gord the Rogue meets Miles Vorkosagian main character engaging in repeated so much it got boring Tom & Jerry chase scenarios, and the third book (THE LAST DANCER) had lots of callbacks to the earlier 2 books but retconned in a Larry Niven style PROTECTOR/PTAVVS thing to the setting and badly needed more editing/removal of at least 2 of the 7 concurrent storylines in the book. 2020 reader verdict on the CONTINUING TIME series: interesting alt-future cyberpunk series, gets kinda skeevy, main characters in each book are extremely high on the Mary Sue scale. === If anything causes me to bail out on my SFLArchives readthrough project, it will be 1993. 3 books of Stephen Donaldson GAP CYCLE discussion, 5 books of WHEEL OF TIME discussion. BABYLON 5 & DEEP SPACE 9 both premiering early in 1993 and oh hell yes there will be fandom wars over the similarities. More CHUNG KUO novels. In addition to all those highly aggravating things, Baen Books unleashes the ultimate mary-sue of military science-fiction, Honor Harrington, onto the literate world in 1993.
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Dec 23, 2020 15:37
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Blood of Elves (Witcher #1) by Andrzej Sapkowski - $2.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00276HAEY/ The Lord of the Rings: One Volume by JRR Tolkien - $4.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B007978OY6/ The Way of Shadows (Night Angel #1) by Brent Weeks - $2.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001E0V112/ The Rage of Dragons (The Burning #1) by Evan Winter - $2.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07L2VKFP5/
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Dec 23, 2020 18:34
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I had an absolute blast with The Ministry For The Future (along with Gibson's The Peripheral and Agency) and I'd love more recommendations of...near-future speculative fiction? I liked Pattern Recognition, but couldn't get into Spook Country.
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Dec 23, 2020 18:41
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quantumfoam posted:
I like this more than you (especially The Long Run), but I'll just note a fourth book came out about 10 years ago. The Long Run had a paragraph or two mentioning various world historical events that occurred during a summer early in that book, one of which was laying the keel of the Unity, a huge starship intended to help the UN conquer the outer planets/colonies. The plot of this one deals with that as it nears completion. https://www.amazon.com/I-War-Book-One-Continuing-ebook/dp/B004XMR5A4
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Dec 23, 2020 19:52
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I have very fond memories of The Long Run, but it's been neatly thirty years.
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Dec 23, 2020 20:41
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