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Harold Fjord
Jan 3, 2004

buffalo all day posted:

Why not try blackout / allclear instead :getin:

Was that good? To say nothing of the dog was so great it made Doomsday book extra disappointing

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CommonShore
Jun 6, 2014

A true renaissance man


tokenbrownguy posted:

Can anyone recommend any nautical/piratical fantasy or sci-fi? I’ve read the Aubery-Maturin and Bone Ships series, and of the two I preferred the latter.

Also, a minimum of sexual assault would be great.

Gene Wolfe Pirate Freedom was ok. I'm not an expert on the period but it felt pretty crunchy for using ship words and stuff. I can't remember if it was 100% sexual assault free or not unfortunately.

Ccs
Feb 25, 2011


Wondering if anyone had any recommendations for good fantasy heist stories. I’ve read Mistborn and Lies of Locke Lamora.

A cursory search online reveals that “Six of Crows” and “Steal the Sky” might be the kind of thing I’m looking for, anybody ready either of those?

Stupid_Sexy_Flander
Mar 14, 2007

Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?
Grimey Drawer
Palace job was pretty good.

fritz
Jul 26, 2003

tokenbrownguy posted:

Can anyone recommend any nautical/piratical fantasy or sci-fi? I’ve read the Aubery-Maturin and Bone Ships series, and of the two I preferred the latter.

Also, a minimum of sexual assault would be great.

There's these: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chathrand_Novels which I enjoyed. There is sexual assault against a supporting character but I don't remember how much was on-screen. (I don't recall other incidents but that doesn't mean they weren't there)

showbiz_liz
Jun 2, 2008

tokenbrownguy posted:

Can anyone recommend any nautical/piratical fantasy or sci-fi? I’ve read the Aubery-Maturin and Bone Ships series, and of the two I preferred the latter.

Also, a minimum of sexual assault would be great.

I like the Temeraire series which is essentially "what if Napoleonic Wars but dragons exist." They were the first published work of Naomi Novik who went on to win a bunch of awards for her later work.

cptn_dr
Sep 7, 2011

Seven for beauty that blossoms and dies


I enjoyed the first few Temeraire novels, but I think it's like Dune — stop reading once you finish one and say "yeah I don't need any more of that", because the returns are strictly diminishing.

branedotorg
Jun 19, 2009

mewse posted:

Respectfully disagree, it felt like the most hackish novel I've read in at least 2 years. It's like "what if michael crichton were stupider" or "what if dan brown thought he wrote sci-fi"

Amazon keeps recommending that one to me and everytime I see the page I'm put off by the amount of promotion and author quotes on the page.

If it was good it wouldn't need so much gilding.

branedotorg
Jun 19, 2009

Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:

Palace job was pretty good.

Sequels too, very much more of the same - lightweight fantasy oceans eleven.

Lot of fun.

buffalo all day
Mar 13, 2019

Harold Fjord posted:

Was that good? To say nothing of the dog was so great it made Doomsday book extra disappointing

No they’re absolutely dire. Struggling to think of a worse modern Hugo winner.

tokenbrownguy
Apr 1, 2010

Thanks folks! I'll check 'em all out.

AngusPodgorny
Jun 3, 2004

Please to be restful, it is only a puffin that has from the puffin place outbroken.

tokenbrownguy posted:

Can anyone recommend any nautical/piratical fantasy or sci-fi? I’ve read the Aubery-Maturin and Bone Ships series, and of the two I preferred the latter.

Also, a minimum of sexual assault would be great.
If you want to go non-fiction, you can go Batavia's Graveyard by Mike Dash (which I just recommended in the book of the month thread, about a bloody mutiny) or If A Pirate I Must Be by Richard Sanders (a biography of Bartholemew Roberts). Although I have to caution that because they're real stories of some brutal people, there is some rape, especially in Batavia's Graveyard.

For fiction, Red Seas under Red Skies by Scott Lynch comes to mind. It's the second or third novel in the series, but I think you could jump straight to it because it's really just repeated characters with a backstory rather than part of a continuing story. However, at 36% of the way in, I've only just now gotten to the nautical part, and prior to this it's been a heist story, but he seems to have put decent effort into getting it right.

Amniotic
Jan 23, 2008

Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.

mewse posted:

Respectfully disagree, it felt like the most hackish novel I've read in at least 2 years. It's like "what if michael crichton were stupider" or "what if dan brown thought he wrote sci-fi"

I gave a couple of his books a chance. Like Recursion was a more interesting idea than his execution of it. "What if Dan Brown wrote sci-fi" is pretty accurate.

Stupid_Sexy_Flander
Mar 14, 2007

Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?
Grimey Drawer
Honestly if you like Blake Crouch's stuff but find it a little bit kinda like... Dan Brownish? I'd suggest Peter Clines. Similar sort of ideas on some things, but the writing is better. I enjoyed his superhero zombie novels but stuff like 14 and The Fold were pretty great by themselves.

mewse
May 2, 2006

I have no quarrel with you if you enjoyed Dark Matter by Blake Crouch, it's just for me personally the plot drove me up the wall. I'm going to spoiler what I remember about the plot and the ending so BIG SPOILER WARNING

I don't remember how long the intro is but the plot kicks off with the protagonist being abducted and I think thrown into a different universe. He discovers he was abducted BY HIMSELF because in the alternate universe he actually pursued his QUANTUM SCIENCE career and built a universe traveling machine (the infinite universe trope is basically the same as from rick and morty). He finds the machine but can't figure out how to get home so through plot magic he figures out how to get home, he finds his wife, but now because of the infinite number of branches in infinite universes there are now an infinite number of copies of him who have also returned home to find his wife. At this point in the novel I figured the author had written themselves into a corner and the only way to resolve it was to have the protagonist+wife abandon their own universe, and that's what ends up happening. He loving flees the infinite copies of himself by using the timey wimey quantum universe hopping machine to go somewhere else. The end.

I went on a rant similar to what I just wrote to my family and they said "actually that book sounds fun" and I'm like NO! IT'S STUPID!

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993

Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:

Honestly if you like Blake Crouch's stuff but find it a little bit kinda like... Dan Brownish? I'd suggest Peter Clines. Similar sort of ideas on some things, but the writing is better. I enjoyed his superhero zombie novels but stuff like 14 and The Fold were pretty great by themselves.

I often forget that Crouch and Clines aren't the same person tbqh

General Battuta
Feb 7, 2011

This is how you communicate with a fellow intelligence: you hurt it, you keep on hurting it, until you can distinguish the posts from the screams.
I started Dark Matter and I detest how every sentence is a new paragraph but at the same time it's extremely readable. Like maybe it's actually a very good call and I just detest it because I'm prissy and naive.

Stupid_Sexy_Flander
Mar 14, 2007

Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?
Grimey Drawer

Aardvark! posted:

I often forget that Crouch and Clines aren't the same person tbqh

I've been a fan of both for years and I still get their books mixed up when I'm recommending em to people.

pradmer
Mar 31, 2009

Follow me for more books on special!
The Madness Season by CS Friedman - $4.99
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0032FZDU2/

Cardiac
Aug 28, 2012

fritz posted:

There's these: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chathrand_Novels which I enjoyed. There is sexual assault against a supporting character but I don't remember how much was on-screen. (I don't recall other incidents but that doesn't mean they weren't there)

Seconding this one. Pretty great and not often mentioned.
There is also The Liveship series by Robin Hobb.

StrixNebulosa
Feb 14, 2012

You cheated not only the game, but yourself.
But most of all, you cheated BABA

General Battuta posted:

I started Dark Matter and I detest how every sentence is a new paragraph but at the same time it's extremely readable. Like maybe it's actually a very good call and I just detest it because I'm prissy and naive.

I went through a long period where I couldn't read anything with a first person POV because it was too juvenile for me, as I associated it with only YA fiction. Now I'm over that and I've gotten to read more cool things (and YA, you can't be too old to read YA!) and it's good.

That said, what? A whole new paragraph? That sounds bizarre!

freebooter
Jul 7, 2009

mewse posted:

I don't remember how long the intro is but the plot kicks off with the protagonist being abducted and I think thrown into a different universe. He discovers he was abducted BY HIMSELF because in the alternate universe he actually pursued his QUANTUM SCIENCE career and built a universe traveling machine (the infinite universe trope is basically the same as from rick and morty). He finds the machine but can't figure out how to get home so through plot magic he figures out how to get home, he finds his wife, but now because of the infinite number of branches in infinite universes there are now an infinite number of copies of him who have also returned home to find his wife. At this point in the novel I figured the author had written themselves into a corner and the only way to resolve it was to have the protagonist+wife abandon their own universe, and that's what ends up happening. He loving flees the infinite copies of himself by using the timey wimey quantum universe hopping machine to go somewhere else. The end.

That's right. It slaps. :colbert:

I personally thought the consequences that crop up in the third act were clever and what elevated it above a typical dimension-hopping story. Also I get why you'd use Rick & Morty as a contemporary example but that trope has been around for ages..)


General Battuta posted:

I started Dark Matter and I detest how every sentence is a new paragraph but at the same time it's extremely readable. Like maybe it's actually a very good call and I just detest it because I'm prissy and naive.

Yeah that's what I meant about the writing style, it's very, very airport fictiony. But airport fiction can be good. It has its place. Sometimes I want to read something fun, engaging, inconsequential and easy, which includes but is not limited to times when I'm on an intercontinental flight and have no idea what timezone I'm in and my eyes feel like glue. Dark Matter is by no means literature, it's just a good, fun, turn-your-brain-off read that I enjoyed all the way to the end and was never bored with.

buffalo all day
Mar 13, 2019

StrixNebulosa posted:

I went through a long period where I couldn't read anything with a first person POV because it was too juvenile for me, as I associated it with only YA fiction. Now I'm over that and I've gotten to read more cool things (and YA, you can't be too old to read YA!) and it's good.

Call me Ishmael. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coffin warehouses, and bringing up the rear of every funeral I meet; and especially whenever my hypos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street, and methodically knocking people’s hats off—then, I account it high time to get to sea as soon as I can. This is my substitute for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato throws himself upon his sword; I quietly take to the ship. There is nothing surprising in this. If they but knew it, almost all men in their degree, some time or other, cherish very nearly the same feelings towards the ocean with me.

There now is your insular city of the Manhattoes, belted round by wharves as Indian isles by coral reefs—commerce surrounds it with her surf. Right and left, the streets take you waterward. Its extreme downtown is the battery, where that noble mole is washed by waves, and cooled by breezes, which a few hours previous were out of sight of land. Look at the crowds of water-gazers there.

Circumambulate the city of a dreamy Sabbath afternoon. Go from Corlears Hook to Coenties Slip, and from thence, by Whitehall, northward. What do you see?—Posted like silent sentinels all around the town, stand thousands upon thousands of mortal men fixed in ocean reveries. Some leaning against the spiles; some seated upon the pier-heads; some looking over the bulwarks of ships from China; some high aloft in the rigging, as if striving to get a still better seaward peep. But these are all landsmen; of week days pent up in lath and plaster—tied to counters, nailed to benches, clinched to desks. How then is this? Are the green fields gone? What do they here?

But look! here come more crowds, pacing straight for the water, and seemingly bound for a dive. Strange! Nothing will content them but the extremest limit of the land; loitering under the shady lee of yonder warehouses will not suffice. No. They must get just as nigh the water as they possibly can without falling in. And there they stand—miles of them—leagues. Inlanders all, they come from lanes and alleys, streets and avenues—north, east, south, and west. Yet here they all unite. Tell me, does the magnetic virtue of the needles of the compasses of all those ships attract them thither?

Once more. Say you are in the country; in some high land of lakes. Take almost any path you please, and ten to one it carries you down in a dale, and leaves you there by a pool in the stream. There is magic in it. Let the most absent-minded of men be plunged in his deepest reveries—stand that man on his legs, set his feet a-going, and he will infallibly lead you to water, if water there be in all that region. Should you ever be athirst in the great American desert, try this experiment, if your caravan happen to be supplied with a metaphysical professor. Yes, as every one knows, meditation and water are wedded for ever.

But here is an artist. He desires to paint you the dreamiest, shadiest, quietest, most enchanting bit of romantic landscape in all the valley of the Saco. What is the chief element he employs? There stand his trees, each with a hollow trunk, as if a hermit and a crucifix were within; and here sleeps his meadow, and there sleep his cattle; and up from yonder cottage goes a sleepy smoke. Deep into distant woodlands winds a mazy way, reaching to overlapping spurs of mountains bathed in their hill-side blue. But though the picture lies thus tranced, and though this pine-tree shakes down its sighs like leaves upon this shepherd’s head, yet all were vain, unless the shepherd’s eye were fixed upon the magic stream before him. Go visit the Prairies in June, when for scores on scores of miles you wade knee-deep among Tiger-lilies—what is the one charm wanting?—Water—there is not a drop of water there! Were Niagara but a cataract of sand, would you travel your thousand miles to see it? Why did the poor poet of Tennessee, upon suddenly receiving two handfuls of silver, deliberate whether to buy him a coat, which he sadly needed, or invest his money in a pedestrian trip to Rockaway Beach? Why is almost every robust healthy boy with a robust healthy soul in him, at some time or other crazy to go to sea? Why upon your first voyage as a passenger, did you yourself feel such a mystical vibration, when first told that you and your ship were now out of sight of land? Why did the old Persians hold the sea holy? Why did the Greeks give it a separate deity, and own brother of Jove? Surely all this is not without meaning. And still deeper the meaning of that story of Narcissus, who because he could not grasp the tormenting, mild image he saw in the fountain, plunged into it and was drowned. But that same image, we ourselves see in all rivers and oceans. It is the image of the ungraspable phantom of life; and this is the key to it all.

Now, when I say that I am in the habit of going to sea whenever I begin to grow hazy about the eyes, and begin to be over conscious of my lungs, I do not mean to have it inferred that I ever go to sea as a passenger. For to go as a passenger you must needs have a purse, and a purse is but a rag unless you have something in it. Besides, passengers get sea-sick—grow quarrelsome—don’t sleep of nights—do not enjoy themselves much, as a general thing;—no, I never go as a passenger; nor, though I am something of a salt, do I ever go to sea as a Commodore, or a Captain, or a Cook. I abandon the glory and distinction of such offices to those who like them. For my part, I abominate all honorable respectable toils, trials, and tribulations of every kind whatsoever. It is quite as much as I can do to take care of myself, without taking care of ships, barques, brigs, schooners, and what not. And as for going as cook,—though I confess there is considerable glory in that, a cook being a sort of officer on ship-board—yet, somehow, I never fancied broiling fowls;—though once broiled, judiciously buttered, and judgmatically salted and peppered, there is no one who will speak more respectfully, not to say reverentially, of a broiled fowl than I will. It is out of the idolatrous dotings of the old Egyptians upon broiled ibis and roasted river horse, that you see the mummies of those creatures in their huge bake-houses the pyramids.

No, when I go to sea, I go as a simple sailor, right before the mast, plumb down into the forecastle, aloft there to the royal mast-head. True, they rather order me about some, and make me jump from spar to spar, like a grasshopper in a May meadow. And at first, this sort of thing is unpleasant enough. It touches one’s sense of honor, particularly if you come of an old established family in the land, the Van Rensselaers, or Randolphs, or Hardicanutes. And more than all, if just previous to putting your hand into the tar-pot, you have been lording it as a country schoolmaster, making the tallest boys stand in awe of you. The transition is a keen one, I assure you, from a schoolmaster to a sailor, and requires a strong decoction of Seneca and the Stoics to enable you to grin and bear it. But even this wears off in time.

What of it, if some old hunks of a sea-captain orders me to get a broom and sweep down the decks? What does that indignity amount to, weighed, I mean, in the scales of the New Testament? Do you think the archangel Gabriel thinks anything the less of me, because I promptly and respectfully obey that old hunks in that particular instance? Who ain’t a slave? Tell me that. Well, then, however the old sea-captains may order me about—however they may thump and punch me about, I have the satisfaction of knowing that it is all right; that everybody else is one way or other served in much the same way—either in a physical or metaphysical point of view, that is; and so the universal thump is passed round, and all hands should rub each other’s shoulder-blades, and be content.

Again, I always go to sea as a sailor, because they make a point of paying me for my trouble, whereas they never pay passengers a single penny that I ever heard of. On the contrary, passengers themselves must pay. And there is all the difference in the world between paying and being paid. The act of paying is perhaps the most uncomfortable infliction that the two orchard thieves entailed upon us. But being paid,—what will compare with it? The urbane activity with which a man receives money is really marvellous, considering that we so earnestly believe money to be the root of all earthly ills, and that on no account can a monied man enter heaven. Ah! how cheerfully we consign ourselves to perdition!

Finally, I always go to sea as a sailor, because of the wholesome exercise and pure air of the fore-castle deck. For as in this world, head winds are far more prevalent than winds from astern (that is, if you never violate the Pythagorean maxim), so for the most part the Commodore on the quarter-deck gets his atmosphere at second hand from the sailors on the forecastle. He thinks he breathes it first; but not so. In much the same way do the commonalty lead their leaders in many other things, at the same time that the leaders little suspect it. But wherefore it was that after having repeatedly smelt the sea as a merchant sailor, I should now take it into my head to go on a whaling voyage; this the invisible police officer of the Fates, who has the constant surveillance of me, and secretly dogs me, and influences me in some unaccountable way—he can better answer than any one else. And, doubtless, my going on this whaling voyage, formed part of the grand programme of Providence that was drawn up a long time ago. It came in as a sort of brief interlude and solo between more extensive performances. I take it that this part of the bill must have run something like this:
“Grand Contested Election for the Presidency of the United States. “WHALING VOYAGE BY ONE ISHMAEL. “BLOODY BATTLE IN AFFGHANISTAN.”

Though I cannot tell why it was exactly that those stage managers, the Fates, put me down for this shabby part of a whaling voyage, when others were set down for magnificent parts in high tragedies, and short and easy parts in genteel comedies, and jolly parts in farces—though I cannot tell why this was exactly; yet, now that I recall all the circumstances, I think I can see a little into the springs and motives which being cunningly presented to me under various disguises, induced me to set about performing the part I did, besides cajoling me into the delusion that it was a choice resulting from my own unbiased freewill and discriminating judgment.
Chief among these motives was the overwhelming idea of the great whale himself. Such a portentous and mysterious monster roused all my curiosity. Then the wild and distant seas where he rolled his island bulk; the undeliverable, nameless perils of the whale; these, with all the attending marvels of a thousand Patagonian sights and sounds, helped to sway me to my wish. With other men, perhaps, such things would not have been inducements; but as for me, I am tormented with an everlasting itch for things remote. I love to sail forbidden seas, and land on barbarous coasts. Not ignoring what is good, I am quick to perceive a horror, and could still be social with it—would they let me—since it is but well to be on friendly terms with all the inmates of the place one lodges in.

By reason of these things, then, the whaling voyage was welcome; the great flood-gates of the wonder-world swung open, and in the wild conceits that swayed me to my purpose, two and two there floated into my inmost soul, endless processions of the whale, and, mid most of them all, one grand hooded phantom, like a snow hill in the air.

Uncle Lloyd
Sep 2, 2019

freebooter
Jul 7, 2009

Moby Dick is the oldest book I've read which, while it often bored me, I felt glad and satisfied to have read and appreciate why it's great literature.

The War of the Worlds, I think, is the oldest book I've read that I just genuinely enjoyed.

navyjack
Jul 15, 2006



buffalo all day posted:

Call me Ishmael. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coffin warehouses, and bringing up the rear of every funeral I meet; and especially whenever my hypos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street, and methodically knocking people’s hats off—then, I account it high time to get to sea as soon as I can. This is my substitute for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato throws himself upon his sword; I quietly take to the ship. There is nothing surprising in this. If they but knew it, almost all men in their degree, some time or other, cherish very nearly the same feelings towards the ocean with me.

There now is your insular city of the Manhattoes, belted round by wharves as Indian isles by coral reefs—commerce surrounds it with her surf. Right and left, the streets take you waterward. Its extreme downtown is the battery, where that noble mole is washed by waves, and cooled by breezes, which a few hours previous were out of sight of land. Look at the crowds of water-gazers there.

Circumambulate the city of a dreamy Sabbath afternoon. Go from Corlears Hook to Coenties Slip, and from thence, by Whitehall, northward. What do you see?—Posted like silent sentinels all around the town, stand thousands upon thousands of mortal men fixed in ocean reveries. Some leaning against the spiles; some seated upon the pier-heads; some looking over the bulwarks of ships from China; some high aloft in the rigging, as if striving to get a still better seaward peep. But these are all landsmen; of week days pent up in lath and plaster—tied to counters, nailed to benches, clinched to desks. How then is this? Are the green fields gone? What do they here?

But look! here come more crowds, pacing straight for the water, and seemingly bound for a dive. Strange! Nothing will content them but the extremest limit of the land; loitering under the shady lee of yonder warehouses will not suffice. No. They must get just as nigh the water as they possibly can without falling in. And there they stand—miles of them—leagues. Inlanders all, they come from lanes and alleys, streets and avenues—north, east, south, and west. Yet here they all unite. Tell me, does the magnetic virtue of the needles of the compasses of all those ships attract them thither?

Once more. Say you are in the country; in some high land of lakes. Take almost any path you please, and ten to one it carries you down in a dale, and leaves you there by a pool in the stream. There is magic in it. Let the most absent-minded of men be plunged in his deepest reveries—stand that man on his legs, set his feet a-going, and he will infallibly lead you to water, if water there be in all that region. Should you ever be athirst in the great American desert, try this experiment, if your caravan happen to be supplied with a metaphysical professor. Yes, as every one knows, meditation and water are wedded for ever.

But here is an artist. He desires to paint you the dreamiest, shadiest, quietest, most enchanting bit of romantic landscape in all the valley of the Saco. What is the chief element he employs? There stand his trees, each with a hollow trunk, as if a hermit and a crucifix were within; and here sleeps his meadow, and there sleep his cattle; and up from yonder cottage goes a sleepy smoke. Deep into distant woodlands winds a mazy way, reaching to overlapping spurs of mountains bathed in their hill-side blue. But though the picture lies thus tranced, and though this pine-tree shakes down its sighs like leaves upon this shepherd’s head, yet all were vain, unless the shepherd’s eye were fixed upon the magic stream before him. Go visit the Prairies in June, when for scores on scores of miles you wade knee-deep among Tiger-lilies—what is the one charm wanting?—Water—there is not a drop of water there! Were Niagara but a cataract of sand, would you travel your thousand miles to see it? Why did the poor poet of Tennessee, upon suddenly receiving two handfuls of silver, deliberate whether to buy him a coat, which he sadly needed, or invest his money in a pedestrian trip to Rockaway Beach? Why is almost every robust healthy boy with a robust healthy soul in him, at some time or other crazy to go to sea? Why upon your first voyage as a passenger, did you yourself feel such a mystical vibration, when first told that you and your ship were now out of sight of land? Why did the old Persians hold the sea holy? Why did the Greeks give it a separate deity, and own brother of Jove? Surely all this is not without meaning. And still deeper the meaning of that story of Narcissus, who because he could not grasp the tormenting, mild image he saw in the fountain, plunged into it and was drowned. But that same image, we ourselves see in all rivers and oceans. It is the image of the ungraspable phantom of life; and this is the key to it all.

Now, when I say that I am in the habit of going to sea whenever I begin to grow hazy about the eyes, and begin to be over conscious of my lungs, I do not mean to have it inferred that I ever go to sea as a passenger. For to go as a passenger you must needs have a purse, and a purse is but a rag unless you have something in it. Besides, passengers get sea-sick—grow quarrelsome—don’t sleep of nights—do not enjoy themselves much, as a general thing;—no, I never go as a passenger; nor, though I am something of a salt, do I ever go to sea as a Commodore, or a Captain, or a Cook. I abandon the glory and distinction of such offices to those who like them. For my part, I abominate all honorable respectable toils, trials, and tribulations of every kind whatsoever. It is quite as much as I can do to take care of myself, without taking care of ships, barques, brigs, schooners, and what not. And as for going as cook,—though I confess there is considerable glory in that, a cook being a sort of officer on ship-board—yet, somehow, I never fancied broiling fowls;—though once broiled, judiciously buttered, and judgmatically salted and peppered, there is no one who will speak more respectfully, not to say reverentially, of a broiled fowl than I will. It is out of the idolatrous dotings of the old Egyptians upon broiled ibis and roasted river horse, that you see the mummies of those creatures in their huge bake-houses the pyramids.

No, when I go to sea, I go as a simple sailor, right before the mast, plumb down into the forecastle, aloft there to the royal mast-head. True, they rather order me about some, and make me jump from spar to spar, like a grasshopper in a May meadow. And at first, this sort of thing is unpleasant enough. It touches one’s sense of honor, particularly if you come of an old established family in the land, the Van Rensselaers, or Randolphs, or Hardicanutes. And more than all, if just previous to putting your hand into the tar-pot, you have been lording it as a country schoolmaster, making the tallest boys stand in awe of you. The transition is a keen one, I assure you, from a schoolmaster to a sailor, and requires a strong decoction of Seneca and the Stoics to enable you to grin and bear it. But even this wears off in time.

What of it, if some old hunks of a sea-captain orders me to get a broom and sweep down the decks? What does that indignity amount to, weighed, I mean, in the scales of the New Testament? Do you think the archangel Gabriel thinks anything the less of me, because I promptly and respectfully obey that old hunks in that particular instance? Who ain’t a slave? Tell me that. Well, then, however the old sea-captains may order me about—however they may thump and punch me about, I have the satisfaction of knowing that it is all right; that everybody else is one way or other served in much the same way—either in a physical or metaphysical point of view, that is; and so the universal thump is passed round, and all hands should rub each other’s shoulder-blades, and be content.

Again, I always go to sea as a sailor, because they make a point of paying me for my trouble, whereas they never pay passengers a single penny that I ever heard of. On the contrary, passengers themselves must pay. And there is all the difference in the world between paying and being paid. The act of paying is perhaps the most uncomfortable infliction that the two orchard thieves entailed upon us. But being paid,—what will compare with it? The urbane activity with which a man receives money is really marvellous, considering that we so earnestly believe money to be the root of all earthly ills, and that on no account can a monied man enter heaven. Ah! how cheerfully we consign ourselves to perdition!

Finally, I always go to sea as a sailor, because of the wholesome exercise and pure air of the fore-castle deck. For as in this world, head winds are far more prevalent than winds from astern (that is, if you never violate the Pythagorean maxim), so for the most part the Commodore on the quarter-deck gets his atmosphere at second hand from the sailors on the forecastle. He thinks he breathes it first; but not so. In much the same way do the commonalty lead their leaders in many other things, at the same time that the leaders little suspect it. But wherefore it was that after having repeatedly smelt the sea as a merchant sailor, I should now take it into my head to go on a whaling voyage; this the invisible police officer of the Fates, who has the constant surveillance of me, and secretly dogs me, and influences me in some unaccountable way—he can better answer than any one else. And, doubtless, my going on this whaling voyage, formed part of the grand programme of Providence that was drawn up a long time ago. It came in as a sort of brief interlude and solo between more extensive performances. I take it that this part of the bill must have run something like this:
“Grand Contested Election for the Presidency of the United States. “WHALING VOYAGE BY ONE ISHMAEL. “BLOODY BATTLE IN AFFGHANISTAN.”

Though I cannot tell why it was exactly that those stage managers, the Fates, put me down for this shabby part of a whaling voyage, when others were set down for magnificent parts in high tragedies, and short and easy parts in genteel comedies, and jolly parts in farces—though I cannot tell why this was exactly; yet, now that I recall all the circumstances, I think I can see a little into the springs and motives which being cunningly presented to me under various disguises, induced me to set about performing the part I did, besides cajoling me into the delusion that it was a choice resulting from my own unbiased freewill and discriminating judgment.
Chief among these motives was the overwhelming idea of the great whale himself. Such a portentous and mysterious monster roused all my curiosity. Then the wild and distant seas where he rolled his island bulk; the undeliverable, nameless perils of the whale; these, with all the attending marvels of a thousand Patagonian sights and sounds, helped to sway me to my wish. With other men, perhaps, such things would not have been inducements; but as for me, I am tormented with an everlasting itch for things remote. I love to sail forbidden seas, and land on barbarous coasts. Not ignoring what is good, I am quick to perceive a horror, and could still be social with it—would they let me—since it is but well to be on friendly terms with all the inmates of the place one lodges in.

By reason of these things, then, the whaling voyage was welcome; the great flood-gates of the wonder-world swung open, and in the wild conceits that swayed me to my purpose, two and two there floated into my inmost soul, endless processions of the whale, and, mid most of them all, one grand hooded phantom, like a snow hill in the air.

quantumfoam
Dec 25, 2003

James E. Gunn died last month of natural causes(old age). He was 97 years old, and was the final link between silver-age SF&F genre fiction and modern SF&F genre fiction.
May no versions of Tom Gavin haunt James E. Gunn in his next life.

Taking a break from my SFL Archives 1993 readthrough attempt (my loathing of everything/everyone in it is extremely strong right now), ended up reading Michael Swanwick's 1987 novel Vacuum Flowers and it was better cyberpunk than William Gibson. Planning on reading Swanwick's Station of the Tide next. Also been going back and time and creating standalone posts for the unicorn-goat meltdown of 1981 including the actual goat-horn surgery patent*, and the possible inspirations for some of Philip K Dick stories.


Nobody answered my question about Matt Ruff's Lovecraft Country so I'm guessing the Catfishing element is extremely high in it.


* https://patentimages.storage.googleapis.com/pdfs/US4429685.pdf

quantumfoam fucked around with this message at 04:38 on Jan 24, 2021

buffalo all day
Mar 13, 2019


Imagine tl:dr’ing moby dick. Incredible.

navyjack
Jul 15, 2006



buffalo all day posted:

Imagine tl:dr’ing moby dick. Incredible.

Worked in high school, I don’t see why I should change now.

shelley
Nov 8, 2010

quantumfoam posted:

Nobody answered my question about Matt Ruff's Lovecraft Country so I'm guessing the Catfishing element is extremely high in it.

It’s been a few years since I read it but I... did not get that vibe at all :shrug:

Stupid_Sexy_Flander
Mar 14, 2007

Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?
Grimey Drawer
I think I made it about 75% of the way through and I can't recall any sort of catfishing style plot. There's a bit of "damsel in distress" style plots, but that's about the only close thing I can remember that'd be similar.

Groke
Jul 27, 2007
New Adventures In Mom Strength

freebooter posted:

Moby Dick is the oldest book I've read which, while it often bored me, I felt glad and satisfied to have read and appreciate why it's great literature.

The War of the Worlds, I think, is the oldest book I've read that I just genuinely enjoyed.

Try Xenophon's Anabasis. It's like 2400 years old and the plot is still getting ripped off by almost every milSF author.

Strom Cuzewon
Jul 1, 2010

quote:

For as in this world, head winds are far more prevalent than winds from astern (that is, if you never violate the Pythagorean maxim), so for the most part the Commodore on the quarter-deck gets his atmosphere at second hand from the sailors on the forecastle. He thinks he breathes it first; but not so.

PeterWeller
Apr 21, 2003

I told you that story so I could tell you this one.

quantumfoam posted:

Nobody answered my question about Matt Ruff's Lovecraft Country so I'm guessing the Catfishing element is extremely high in it.

Nah, not really. If you're thinking about the part from the show that has a catfishing element, it's different in the novel.

cptn_dr
Sep 7, 2011

Seven for beauty that blossoms and dies


https://twitter.com/torbooks/status/1353455031891189764?s=19

I appreciate that she chose the best character to write a spin-off about.

Ccs
Feb 25, 2011


Looking forward to that book.

Also the first Baru is on sale again today
https://www.amazon.com/Traitor-Baru-Cormorant-Masquerade-Book-ebook/dp/B00V351EOM

pradmer
Mar 31, 2009

Follow me for more books on special!
Some KJ Parker books on sale again - $1.99 each
Folding Knife - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0035IICZO/
Pattern (Scavenger #2) - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00B3VX3Y0/
Memory (Scavenger #3) - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00B3VX3T0/

BlackHattingMachine
Mar 24, 2006
Choking, quick with the Heimlich!
Can anyone comment on the Corporation Wars trilogy by Ken MacLeod? Specifically if it manages to avoid strong libertarian vibes, life is too short to read Ayn Rand knock-offs.

Urcher
Jun 16, 2006


BlackHattingMachine posted:

Can anyone comment on the Corporation Wars trilogy by Ken MacLeod? Specifically if it manages to avoid strong libertarian vibes, life is too short to read Ayn Rand knock-offs.

I've only read his Fall Revolution books. Based on then I would be very surprised if his later writing was libertarian. His earlier stuff is very socialist.

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quantumfoam
Dec 25, 2003

BlackHattingMachine posted:

Can anyone comment on the Corporation Wars trilogy by Ken MacLeod? Specifically if it manages to avoid strong libertarian vibes, life is too short to read Ayn Rand knock-offs.

They are terrible and can safely be skipped.

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