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also a 40+ reply thread about how badly a crab spider (that half the town was completely convinced was a brown recluse despite looking nothing at all like a brown recluse other than being a brown spider) was going to kill them and their children in their sleep
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Apr 3, 2022 08:55
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Rockman Reserve posted:i opened Nextdoor a few days ago and one of the top posts was some loving brain donor openly wondering what kind of minority would break into their fenced backyard to steal their bird feeders, as if raccoons didn’t exist My personal fave is when they say "im a HOMEOWNER" as if that makes them somehow superior/more important than the various renters that might be posting
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Apr 3, 2022 09:12
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Rockman Reserve posted:i opened Nextdoor a few days ago and one of the top posts was some loving brain donor openly wondering what kind of minority would break into their fenced backyard to steal their bird feeders, as if raccoons didn’t exist Goddamn, dark teenaged islamics kicking back in their thieves' den deep in the ghetto, munching handfuls of purloined songbird seed mix and laughing, laughing, laughing
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Apr 4, 2022 03:37
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Bismuth posted:My personal fave is when they say "im a HOMEOWNER" as if that makes them somehow superior/more important than the various renters that might be posting 
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Apr 4, 2022 03:47
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me walking down the street in a cardboard box with a door and windows drawn on it after our rent goes up another $50
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Apr 4, 2022 04:03
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Depending on the area, I kind of get the home owner thing. When EaDo in Houston first started taking off and they were tearing everything down to throw up townhouse, there was alot of friction between the old married couples that thought they bought their retirement home and the people that bought them just to Air BNB them for sporting events or rent them to college kids. Although to be fair to the homeowners, the block I lived on had alot of really loud random parties at 4 am on a Wednesday ending in literal gunfights in the street. I feel like most people clamoring to tell you that they are a homeowner are not in that sort of situation.
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Apr 4, 2022 10:11
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Hi my wife is in intensive care with covid, so know any good cleaning services?
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Apr 4, 2022 13:28
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Pragmatic!
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Apr 4, 2022 13:31
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Brawnfire posted:Pragmatic! She's busy enough as an admin, please don't bother her to go clean some boomer's house.
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Apr 4, 2022 13:32
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i put the homo in homeowner and i
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Apr 4, 2022 13:34
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Eh I think putting all that in the ad is unnecessary but after my dad died one of the most surreal aspects was that you still have to, like, wash dishes and take out the rubbish and feed the cat and clean the bathroom. If I could have hired someone to deal with all that for a week or two while we sat around in shock I would have.
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Apr 4, 2022 14:22
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Also please be fit and under 40 as my wife may have been dead for hours and well, I’m a bit lonely and miss the company of a woman
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Apr 4, 2022 14:29
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MarxCarl posted:Hi my wife is in intensive care with covid, so know any good cleaning services?  I swear, some people are anti-vax/anti-mask because they’re trying to kill someone close to them.
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Apr 4, 2022 15:03
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HopperUK posted:Eh I think putting all that in the ad is unnecessary but after my dad died one of the most surreal aspects was that you still have to, like, wash dishes and take out the rubbish and feed the cat and clean the bathroom. If I could have hired someone to deal with all that for a week or two while we sat around in shock I would have. Maybe it's a bunch of lies for the purpose of trying for a cheap, pity-based house cleaning quote.
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Apr 4, 2022 17:31
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Pfft, everyone knows weddings and funerals are when you triple your prices
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Apr 4, 2022 17:42
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Ironhead posted:Depending on the area, I kind of get the home owner thing. When EaDo in Houston first started taking off and they were tearing everything down to throw up townhouse, there was alot of friction between the old married couples that thought they bought their retirement home and the people that bought them just to Air BNB them for sporting events or rent them to college kids. Although to be fair to the homeowners, the block I lived on had alot of really loud random parties at 4 am on a Wednesday ending in literal gunfights in the street. My home was built in 2014 and only has 90,000 miles on it!
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Apr 4, 2022 17:58
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MarxCarl posted:Hi my wife is in intensive care with covid, so know any good cleaning services? God drat, that's pretty grim. Anticipating what I assume is relatives and friends coming over when she dies.
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Apr 4, 2022 20:34
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Chief McHeath posted:People around me are really loving mad about kids playing ding-dong-ditch, the "game" where you knock on someone's door/ring the doorbell and run out of sight before they can get to the door. Why? I remember when I was a kid I thought this was serious business. Any time I’ve caught kids in my adult life I thought it was adorable. I remember one time I sent my brother around the back and I came out the front and chased them over to my bro. Lol they were screaming their heads off as they ran off wherever. I wouldn’t have done anything to them. I just didn’t want to deny them the thrill of narrowly escaping imagined prison/death. They’ll remember that adventure forever.
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Apr 4, 2022 20:53
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Internet Old One posted:Why? I remember when I was a kid I thought this was serious business. Tresspass = death
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Apr 4, 2022 21:15
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New Vancouver Island Nextdoor Updates: Someone is selling old planter boxes. Keith the "handyman carpenter" moved in. Also Raiel the "Spiritual Investigator" (seriously wtf is that?) People complaining about a beaver dam. Well, that's all for today, what a boring island.
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Apr 4, 2022 21:23
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Pennywise the Frown posted:
When I was in high school my friend and I were walking through a neighborhood full of boring McMansions and he straightened out his hat. “Oh man I almost got caught with my hat to the left in this hood”. This is in a neighborhood where you can leave your bike unlocked for years before it gets stolen.
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Apr 4, 2022 21:33
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Internet Old One posted:When I was in high school my friend and I were walking through a neighborhood full of boring McMansions and he straightened out his hat. “Oh man I almost got caught with my hat to the left in this hood”. This is in a neighborhood where you can leave your bike unlocked for years before it gets stolen. White kids pretending how "hood" they are, and how tough their suburban, white-ish collar, both parents, low end land rover, bmw and mercedes driving neighborhood is has been going on since the early 80s. "bro its like compton, I saw the cops driving down my street the other day".
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Apr 5, 2022 02:35
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HopperUK posted:Eh I think putting all that in the ad is unnecessary but after my dad died one of the most surreal aspects was that you still have to, like, wash dishes and take out the rubbish and feed the cat and clean the bathroom. If I could have hired someone to deal with all that for a week or two while we sat around in shock I would have. Yeah, especially given he'll have good reason to be just mentally destroyed and exhausted, as well as dealing with relatives and assorted bullshit. Having a clean house he doesn't have to worry about for a bit is probably one of the most sensible reactions.
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Apr 5, 2022 11:57
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Isn't the "nextdoor" part of this a boomer giving waaaay too much information in a classified for simple labor?
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Apr 5, 2022 12:52
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Soul Dentist posted:Isn't the "nextdoor" part of this a boomer giving waaaay too much information in a classified for simple labor? Yeah, that's part of what we're talking about. I just find it interesting sometimes to reflect on what grief can be like and how totally weird it is that the world continues being normal in other ways. Like - I got my period during my dad's funeral. Went to the bathroom to wash my face because I'd been crying and welp, there it is, mundanity just loving crashing in and a new logistical issue to worry about despite everything else I needed to handle that day. It's overused since Four Weddings and a Funeral but that poem about 'stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone' speaks to that feeling, I think. Like, what the gently caress do you mean I need to find sanitary products right now, my loving dad is dead, what the gently caress. ...anyway how about them HOAs
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Apr 5, 2022 13:24
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Any time I see HOA written I pronounce it like a rimy old Mainer yelling "whore!"
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Apr 5, 2022 13:32
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Soul Dentist posted:Isn't the "nextdoor" part of this a boomer giving waaaay too much information in a classified for simple labor? Pretty much. Another important thing to remember is that this guy’s been with his wife through eleven years of very touch-and-go health issues. That kind of long term caretaking tends to make you off-puttingly frank about death. I get the impression he’s trying to prepare for the worst before it happens, so in the event he has to deal with the emotional apocalypse of all the various things put into motion when your partner dies, he will at least not have to worry about keeping house on top of it. More old goblins confusing the end results of raccoons pillaging their poo poo for phantom hoodlums, please.
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Apr 5, 2022 13:34
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Mellow_ posted:New Vancouver Island Nextdoor Updates: I feel the presence of spirits... many, many, many malignant spirits. Dozens of them. (Coughs) This isn't going to be cheap, I'm afraid.
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Apr 5, 2022 14:40
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That island attracts some real mystics. Can't go 2 feet without tripping over a tarot reading or a seance. Every child has a ouija board.
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Apr 5, 2022 16:09
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I end every date who asks for my sign.
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Apr 5, 2022 16:14
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No. 6 posted:I end every date who asks for my sign. Yeah, if someone asks my birthday and then they're like "oh, you're a gemini!" I know to dumb things down for them.
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Apr 5, 2022 16:32
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If you want to test them, insist you're a "cusp" I've done that on twitter, gets 'em frothy
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Apr 5, 2022 16:39
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what's a cusp
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Apr 5, 2022 16:41
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A cusple of deez nuts lol got em
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Apr 5, 2022 16:42
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It's like "between" two signs, like a Libra-Scorpio cusp. Lots of people angrily insist it doesn't exist, you can only be one or the other. Many others angrily insist it does. It doesn't, but boy will they talk about it. When they get out charts...
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Apr 5, 2022 16:43
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Haha yeah, spiritualism is stupid, take that strawmen!
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Apr 5, 2022 17:26
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Fashionable Jorts posted:Haha yeah, spiritualism is stupid, take that strawmen! I don't need strawmen. I know people into Human Design.
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Apr 5, 2022 18:29
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Indolent Bastard posted:I don't need strawmen. I know people into Human Design. I've met those people too.
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Apr 5, 2022 18:44
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Spiritualist stuff is pointless
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Apr 5, 2022 19:14
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I fed 20,000 Nextdoor posts into an AI script and I got the following: quote:I asked an urban man to fix my house and he said it would be 600 dollars. Can anyone do it for 30? Also he was looking at my begonias like he was thinking about stealing them. Did anyone hear that shooting? Did anyone see a coyote? Why don't kids work hard anymore and why don't kids go outside and why don't kids salute me when I hassle the grocery store clerk when I try to redeem my very slightly expired coupons???
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Apr 6, 2022 02:51
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