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I put it in the hunting thread, but earlier this year I had a fuckup out hunting the involved me rolling down a hill into a glacial river with a goat tied to my back. Had to get out of the pack and goat while submerged, then dive back in to get my gear. While I had a PLB the general rule of thumb is to allow anywhere up to a day for help to arrive and at that point it was about 4pm and 2°c so I made a splint for my buggered ankle, changed my top clothes (no way was my pants coming off, because of said ankle) crawled up the hill and walked back to the car. The thought of just sitting there and waiting a night never even crossed my mind. Not gonna lie though, I've had a few dreams about hitting that water and going down. I was also out a few years ago with a guy who slipped on a wooden step in the back country, put his hand out to save himself and caught his arm on the corner. Rolled the skin of his arm up from mid forearm to his elbow. We duct taped a spare shirt over it and walked back a hour or so. To keep it vaguely idiot related I went to take a poo poo in the woods and got bitten on the balls by a sandfly. By the time I admitted defeat and went to the dr my ballsack was like an orange stuck under my dick and they weren't sure if I'd ever have children.
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Aug 9, 2023 09:15
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| # ? Jun 8, 2024 14:39 |
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carrionman posted:I put it in the hunting thread, but earlier this year I had a fuckup out hunting the involved me rolling down a hill into a glacial river with a goat tied to my back. username doesn't track
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Aug 9, 2023 10:35
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The forecast calls for a trio of 100 degree days coming up. We haven't had real rain but maybe one or two days this entire past month and a half. This is one of the worst summers we've ever had. You've got to go back to 1980 to find something nearly as miserable in NOLA. I want to live somewhere cold.
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Aug 9, 2023 12:15
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Kitfox88 posted:And here I felt like an idiot for not realizing an ingrown hair had abscessed Ow
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Aug 9, 2023 12:43
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Only time I've blacked out from pain in my life was the debriding, do not recommend!
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Aug 9, 2023 13:21
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A.o.D. posted:The forecast calls for a trio of 100 degree days coming up. We haven't had real rain but maybe one or two days this entire past month and a half. This is one of the worst summers we've ever had. You've got to go back to 1980 to find something nearly as miserable in NOLA. I want to live somewhere cold. Sup 30 degree latitude buddy. I grew up in the NOLA area and live in Houston now.  It has been like this constantly since mid June. It last rained on July 8th. I keep swearing to anyone that will listen that it was just NOT. THIS. HOT. when I was a kid in the 90s.
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Aug 9, 2023 14:17
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Meanwhile the Texas energy companies are desperately trying to figure out how to trick people into accepting 90+ degrees is room temperature.
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Aug 9, 2023 15:08
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i'm a lurker, but i hadn't seen this posted here: https://twitter.com/Iron_Man_Actual/status/1689233744513691648
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Aug 10, 2023 01:42
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carrionman posted:I put it in the hunting thread, but earlier this year I had a fuckup out hunting the involved me rolling down a hill into a glacial river with a goat tied to my back. Was it user The Rat (?), who went on a hiking date where she rolled her ankle, he carried her down the mountain, and he never got a call back?
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Aug 10, 2023 07:37
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carrionman posted:I put it in the hunting thread, but earlier this year I had a fuckup out hunting the involved me rolling down a hill into a glacial river with a goat tied to my back. Was the goat ok???
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Aug 10, 2023 11:34
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Fragrag posted:Was the goat ok??? He was simply gutted by the whole experience
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Aug 10, 2023 12:43
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JPrime posted:i'm a lurker, but i hadn't seen this posted here: https://twitter.com/Iron_Man_Actual/status/1689233744513691648 https://i.imgur.com/4YKYuzw.mp4
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Aug 10, 2023 20:22
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Saw this and thought of here. https://www.tavour.com/b/drinking-crayons-b255080
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Aug 11, 2023 08:08
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Promote ahead of peers.
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Aug 11, 2023 08:13
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https://twitter.com/bigdaddyofnine/status/1643223889936277506 probably a thread classic but came up again and had a chuckle
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Aug 11, 2023 08:44
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On the internet nobody knows you're a dog.
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Aug 15, 2023 09:45
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Git sum debil dawg
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Aug 15, 2023 12:40
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At first I actually thought it was a seal, and was going to quip that I thought they were Navy
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Aug 15, 2023 13:25
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The face you get when you find a NOD unsecured on the ground and ask your privates for a SI check. Edit: If you don't speak US Army: NOD- Night Observation Device SI- Seriously, if you lose ANY of this equipment, *I* will loving murder you and your entire goddamn family. Gorilla Radio fucked around with this message at 14:43 on Aug 15, 2023 |
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Aug 15, 2023 14:07
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Are there any tactical milsims that model military stupidity, like by having percentile rolls for equipped gear to just vanish?
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Aug 15, 2023 16:31
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XCOM does. No other way to explain missing point-blank shots. 
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Aug 15, 2023 16:36
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Tunicate posted:Are there any tactical milsims that model military stupidity, like by having percentile rolls for equipped gear to just vanish? Aliens: Dark Descent has certain dudes steal recovered supplies post-mission. E: most marines have some kind of trait (clumsy, klepto, etc) and the klepto-marines will literally steal supplies needed for your ship to take back off and avoid the inbound nuclear cleansing 
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Aug 15, 2023 16:51
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Jagged Alliance 2 had a guy you needed to bribe to prevent portions of your deliveries from being stolen. If you kill him, he gets replaced with another guy who's so incompetent he can lose ENTIRE shipments. And if you kill that guy, you can't get any more supply shipments. There were also some characters that would get drunk/high if they were left in an area with alcohol/drugs/meds. They could also steal money or items. Some characters hated each other so much they'd kill each other or quit if they were in the same area. A lot of them were just really, really dumb.
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Aug 15, 2023 19:21
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Icon Of Sin posted:Aliens: Dark Descent has certain dudes steal recovered supplies post-mission. There's also the addict trait which means an extra medkit mysteriously vanishes whenever you rest 
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Aug 15, 2023 19:56
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Gorilla Radio posted:The face you get when you find a NOD unsecured on the ground and ask your privates for a SI check. was it this thread where someone told the story of opening the units mystery random crap conex and finding it full of undocumented crypto gear
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Aug 15, 2023 20:00
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The poor guy who took over the armory without going through everything in there first? Just signed off on it and waved to the previous dude as he sped off into the sunset. There was a box of undocumented crypto, a box of receivers (I think that's what they're called anyways. The thing that is considered the gun out of all the parts that go into making one) with their serial numbers filed off and two more boxes of equally insane poo poo. Goon consensus ended up somewhere between "get the commander down there ASAP if you think he can be trusted not to throw you under the bus", "get a shovel and a truck and then bury them all in the desert" and "get the commander, then get two shovels and a truck and help the commander bury that poo poo in the desert". I've never seen so many goons agree on something so fast before.
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Aug 15, 2023 20:24
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Icon Of Sin posted:Aliens: Dark Descent has certain dudes steal recovered supplies post-mission. I endorse that game, it really captures the feel of Aliens
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Aug 15, 2023 20:35
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ARMA fits into that niche for me, I tried it once after a bunch of people in my unit talked it up and told me about their SUPER COOL GUILD. During my first game I wasn't allowed to ride in the APC as the FNG, so I had to virtually hump a mile by myself. Privates don't get GPS units so after trying to dead-reckon through a forest I wind up in an empty village. The roadsigns are written in a completely different alphabet than my map so I can't easily figure out where I am. Eventually I see some flak bursts over the horizon so I steal a car and drive in that general direction. I am shot by a sniper and die in the car before reaching the front lines. Now I have to wait for some fukken LT to allow me to respawn. gently caress ARMA. Guest2553 fucked around with this message at 22:18 on Aug 15, 2023 |
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Aug 15, 2023 20:38
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SerthVarnee posted:The poor guy who took over the armory without going through everything in there first? There's a real process but no one likes you afterwards, because Uncle Sam is out there blowing up a lot of backroom deals as collateral.
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Aug 15, 2023 21:00
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Wasabi the J posted:There's a real process but no one likes you afterwards, because Uncle Sam is out there blowing up a lot of backroom deals as collateral. I'd rather no one like me at the unit than have them not give a poo poo about me in Leavenworth.
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Aug 15, 2023 21:11
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I know ARMA has a salute button, isn't there also a push-up button?
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Aug 15, 2023 21:16
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My company did the Official US Army Arma Simulator© once. They gave me 2 javelin missle systems, then got mad when my stamina immediately tanked and I couldn't keep up on the movement. Javelin missle= ~50 lbs (20 kg)
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Aug 15, 2023 21:34
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I popped a trailer open when I was in the reserves back in the early/mid 90s and found a bunch of unsecured and undocumented crypto devices, thrn promptly cried in anguish. It wouldn't surprise me if it happened in other places.
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Aug 15, 2023 22:52
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Syrian Lannister posted:I popped a trailer open when I was in the reserves back in the early/mid 90s and found a bunch of unsecured and undocumented crypto devices, thrn promptly cried in anguish. For a brief second I thought you were talking about bitcoin poo poo. And frankly it wouldn't surprise me if some troop was trying to be a superbrain and run a bunch of crypto poo poo on DOD hardware.
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Aug 16, 2023 00:41
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I would love to read a declassified report in 25 years about somebody doing just that on a classified network and what's why JWICS was so janky to use in 202X.
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Aug 16, 2023 00:59
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Wasabi the J posted:There's a real process but no one likes you afterwards, because Uncle Sam is out there blowing up a lot of backroom deals as collateral. Chickenhawks has a story about a Huey going down in Vietnam, and when the army declared it lost the inventory of gear on the helicopter amounted to something like fifteen or twenty tons.
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Aug 16, 2023 01:13
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My battalion had our mystery weapons armory. It was an old ammo bunker on Lewis where all the random poo poo that got scoured up wound up for 'foreign weapons familiarization' training. It had the weirdest assortment of gear, including a goddamn Vickers that had been 'recovered' in Vietnam back in the 60s and been mounted on what looked like an old wheelbarrow frame.
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Aug 16, 2023 02:23
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That crazy guy in NK might still be alive. NK officially acknowledged that he crossed the border.
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Aug 16, 2023 03:18
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I'm so glad that he's not one of my troops, RIP his chain.
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Aug 16, 2023 03:38
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Jimmy Smuts posted:I'm so glad that he's not one of my troops, RIP his chain. Why would his chain be in the firing line? After all it was the MPs that hosed up and he had already done a stint in Korean prison I thought.
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Aug 16, 2023 04:21
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