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Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮

quote:

HUGE NEWS: ImpactWrestling.com has learned that Eric Young has informed TNA officials that he plans to defend his World Heavyweight Championship on Thursday's huge IMPACT broadcast on SpikeTV at 9/8c! After retaining the gold in a war against Magnus at Sacrifice, Eric Young wants to be a true fighting champion and will put the gold on the line on Thursday!

Preview Thursday's IMPACT WRESTLING broadcast on SpikeTV at 9/8c! If you can't watch it Thursday, make sure to set your DVR so you don't miss any of the action!

- Thursday's broadcast will feature the aftermath from Sunday's "Sacrifice" Pay-Per-View event! Tune in for all the latest news and updates after Sacrifice! Plus, the road begins to the annual June "Slammiversary" epic event!

- Overcoming all odds, Eric Young is STILL the reigning World Heavyweight Champion after Sacrifice! However, it won't get any easier for the champ as he has already promised that he will defend his World Championship again this coming Thursday! Who will Eric defend the gold against this Thursday on Impact?

- Also, what will happen on Thursday between Bully Ray and TNA President Dixie Carter after she cost him the Tables Match against Bobby Roode at Sacrifice? According to sources, Bully Ray is hellbent on delivering payback to Dixie this Thursday on IMPACT! What will happen with this potentially explosive situation? Will all hell break loose if Dixie shows up? Don't miss it this Thursday!

- Also on Thursday: The mysterious alter ego of Jeff Hardy, WILLOW, will be in action against "Cowboy" James Storm

- New TNA World Champions were crowned at Sunday's "Sacrifice" as The Wolves beat The BroMans and DJ Z to finally reclaim the Tag Team Championship, while Angelina Love defeated Madison Rayne to bring the Knockouts Championship back to the Beautiful People! The new champs will be on Thursday's huge broadcast, and The Beautiful People have promised a celebration to remember!

- Also: What's next for Gunner after he defeated James Storm in the "I-Quit" match at Sacrifice? Have we seen the last of Samuel Shaw after he was committed to the mental hospital? Plus, the war between Kurt Angle and Ethan Carter III continues on Thursday - will Angle finally get his payback on EC3?

All this and much more on Thursday's can't-miss iMPACT broadcast as the road to the annual June "Slammiversary" epic event kicks off!

I'm a bit rusty with making IW GDTs, so I haven't got any bon mots to put here. Sorry to disappoint you.

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SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
Good to have you back, Capt.
And god help the rest of us.

skaboomizzy
Nov 12, 2003

There is nothing I want to be. There is nothing I want to do.
I don't even have an image of what I want to be. I have nothing. All that exists is zero.
I'm in the self-loathing groove: cheap bourbon at night, 2000 WCW PPVs by day, 2:30 lunch at Golden Corral, etc. I am so ready for TNA.

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
are you sure your heart, not to mention your psyche, can handle all that?

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
who reads any document standing with one leg propped on a coffee table. why was he not sitting? I know I'm nit-picking but I really want to know.

a.lo
Sep 12, 2009

Eric Young is the wrestler I believe in

jscolon2.0
Jul 9, 2001

With great payroll, comes great disappointment.
Cards? It's the triumphant return of Aces & Eights!

Ninja PD
Jul 21, 2006
I like that opening card segment, but it was obviously fixed with the camera zoom. It would have been way cooler if they actually gambled it because it's TNA so it's not like it matters.

Ninja PD
Jul 21, 2006
HOLY poo poo HOW THE HELL DID I MISS DISGUISED DIXIE

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


"Is that all we get?" You want more?!?

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

dixie carter belongs in that garbage bag

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


oatgan posted:

dixie carter belongs in that garbage bag

Has no one smartened you up?

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
I'm glad they're committing a good chunk of their budget to Spud's increasingly awesome suits.

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

ahahaha he missed the mic

Commissar Ken posted:

Has no one smartened you up?
i'm highly intelligent

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
so if he had somehow kept his job in the WWE, how far do people think he would've gotten?

was he meant for big things?

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


SylvainMustach posted:

so if he had somehow kept his job in the WWE, how far do people think he would've gotten?

was he meant for big things?

Kennedy? I didn't out and out hate him but when it became real obvious he was hurting people because he was being dumb it's time for that jabroni to go. If they hadn't fired him and kept him in the spot he was Taker or someone would have bit the bullet and dropped him on his head.

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

SylvainMustach posted:

so if he had somehow kept his job in the WWE, how far do people think he would've gotten?

was he meant for big things?

well he was the original plan for Vince McMahon's bastard child

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
I had no idea he was that dangerous.

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


To be fair, he's probably still getting paid about 40 quid a night.

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
is that a "Where's your boyfriend" chant?

oh my god. :smith:
oh god

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


He's right there, why are you still chanting?

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


Get it! Get it! Wrestling is gay! ....wait.

Kurt, please just call Vince. He'd totally make you GM of Smackdown or some poo poo that comes with a nice paycheck.

Commissar Ken fucked around with this message at 02:36 on May 2, 2014

skaboomizzy
Nov 12, 2003

There is nothing I want to be. There is nothing I want to do.
I don't even have an image of what I want to be. I have nothing. All that exists is zero.
Didn't Bobby Lashley come out of nowhere to attack EC3 at Lockdown? They never did anything with that, right?

Daniel Bryan
May 23, 2006

GOAT
The most pathetic thing:

https://twitter.com/TNADixie/status/462042708467781632

https://twitter.com/TNADixie/status/462042833013448704

https://twitter.com/TNADixie/status/462043161591029760

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!



Did she just try to take a shot at JR? One of THE most beloved guys in all of wrestling?

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!

wow.

also, who else is really excited for the Menagerie?

EDIT:
Did JR turn down a job there or something? If so, is she honestly surprised?

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

SylvainMustach posted:

wow.

also, who else is really excited for the Menagerie?

EDIT:
Did JR turn down a job there or something? If so, is she honestly surprised?

JR was recently very critical of TNA ripping off WWE angles on his podcast so this is Dixie saying "yeah look at all this great original content we have, IDIOT"

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


Dear Angelina Love,

Now that you are representing TNA as the new Knockouts champion we expect you to take a paycut.

P.S. Tell Velvet she's fired, thanks.

- Dixie 'Big Dix' Carter

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
got it. She does realize that he also brings positive attention to some of their product, right?

He gave props to the Gunner Vs. Storm match (which I didn't really like all too much). He said he thought it was a great match with a rough crowd. He did this on twitter and I'm not sure if he mentioned that on his podcast, but that's seriously some positive feedback coming from a very respected source. More than I think they deserve.

Ah, hell, who am I to try to figure out what's going on in her head.

Pariah Rex
May 31, 2011

If I help you now it sets a bad example to my fans.
Master of the Table! is not an impressive moniker.

Pariah Rex
May 31, 2011

If I help you now it sets a bad example to my fans.
I think there are more fake security guards than wrestlers on the roster.

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

Pariah Rex posted:

I think there are more fake security guards than wrestlers on the roster.

bring back Black Shirt Security

Commissar Ken
Dec 9, 2006

Children STILL love me, dammit!


If they wanted to rip off anything they should have ripped off Cape Fear here and had him beat those security guards with a bike chain. THAT would have been neat at least.

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
those three will return as their Shield rip off soon enough.

Pariah Rex
May 31, 2011

If I help you now it sets a bad example to my fans.

SylvainMustach posted:

those three will return as their Shield rip off soon enough.

Will they be called SWAT, GUARD, or RIOT?

skaboomizzy
Nov 12, 2003

There is nothing I want to be. There is nothing I want to do.
I don't even have an image of what I want to be. I have nothing. All that exists is zero.
Willow vs James Storm makes you see how terribly thin this roster is. There is absolutely no reason at all for these two to be having a match.

SylvainMustach
Dec 12, 2007

Superior Trash Talk!
DJZ rules

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

sanada wasn't sure what to do with his hands there

Fat Lowtax
Nov 9, 2008


"I'm willing to pay up to $1200 for a big anime titty"


:siren: Potential good match alert :siren:

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Ganso Bomb
Oct 24, 2005

turn it all around

I love the Bro Mans. So much. Getting upset because they had a three-on-two advantage and the numbers threw them off? That's awesome.

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