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I was thinking this morning about which WWE wrestlers I might be able to beat in a fight. The answer is probably none but I thought I could maybe get in a super-lucky punch on one of the slighly smaller guys like Chris Jericho or Cody Rhodes and then knee them in the side of the head when they stumbled. And then just keep kicking him in the head so he can't grab me and pull my legs out of their sockets. Or a bigger guy like Roman Reigns if I could sneak attack from behind and land a totally unprotected sideways knee-kick or if I had a baseball bat or a sword. But I couldn't think of any scenario where I'd be able to beat Brock Lesnar unless maybe I had a gun. But even then I feel like I'd possibly cause a couple flesh wounds but nothing serious enough to stop him from charging at me and beating me to death. Question two: how many 5 year-old Brock Lesnars do you think you could fend off before eventually being overrun? but not like Brock Lesnar when he was a 5 year-old. I just mean he's the size of an average 5 year-old boy but he's been shrunken down with the same proportions and stuff. So he's way more ripped than an average 5 year-old and he has all of Brock Lesnar's experience but he's only about 43lbs/19kg. I think I could maybe defend myself from 3 or 4 if I got some lucky breaks in the fight. Your thoughts? I can clarify the specifics if it it seems overly ambiguous.
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Nov 29, 2014 11:14
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I don't have an opinion about this currently
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Nov 29, 2014 12:18
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just punch him right in the diverticulitis
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Nov 29, 2014 12:41
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Kick em in the nuts
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Nov 29, 2014 12:43
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I Before E posted:PUNCH 'EM IN THE BAAAAALLS!
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Nov 29, 2014 13:30
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Hijo Del Helmsley posted:just punch him right in the diverticulitis this was triple h's winning strategy after all
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Nov 29, 2014 13:34
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General rule of thumb seems to be "Give him a shitload of money" and he'll happily pretend to let you beat him up.
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Nov 29, 2014 13:46
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I think first you would need to train your flabby man body to fight a burly baby body. Baby Brock benches lots so you need to bench more. Bench a car. Bench a man. Bench a baby Brock and bench him too high. Bench him into the sun.
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Nov 29, 2014 15:18
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What sort of environment are we fighting in? A wrestling ring? The octagon? I think that with access to a raised platform, the fight drastically changes.
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Nov 29, 2014 17:10
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Striking Yak posted:What sort of environment are we fighting in? A wrestling ring? The octagon? I think that with access to a raised platform, the fight drastically changes. A Jimmy John's where he is midmeal
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Nov 29, 2014 17:27
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The correct plural of 'Brock Lesnar' is 'Brocks Lesnar'. This has been established.
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Nov 29, 2014 17:32
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i doubt the tiny body of a 5 year old could handle the diverticulitis. just poking them in the belly like the pillsbury dough boy would render them all combat ineffective or dead, so I could probably fend off like infinity 5 year old brock lesnars
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Nov 29, 2014 17:54
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You just need an equivalent number of 5 year old Overeems.
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Nov 29, 2014 18:19
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the fact that the OP isn't just a picture of broccoli has soured me on this topic
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Nov 29, 2014 18:29
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-Atom- posted:the fact that the OP isn't just a picture of broccoli has soured me on this topic Ironically this is also the way to beat the undertaker.
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Nov 29, 2014 18:35
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A bunch of wrestlers are basically extremely crippled 45 year olds with pain pill addictions so they'd probably be much easier to beat up than you might expect, op.
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Nov 29, 2014 18:42
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broccoli lesnar defeated by broccoli
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Nov 29, 2014 18:49
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Skinty McEdger posted:Ironically this is also the way to beat the undertaker. it's cucumbers taker is supposedly afraid of, and I sorta hate that I knew that off the top of my head
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Nov 29, 2014 19:10
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Keven. Just. Keven posted:A bunch of wrestlers are basically extremely crippled 45 year olds with pain pill addictions so they'd probably be much easier to beat up than you might expect, op. "Go right for the quad" applies to at least three wrestlers I can think of off the top of my head, so you're right.
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Nov 29, 2014 19:29
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How much prep time and/or horse meat do I have in this hypothetical, OP
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Nov 29, 2014 19:44
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A thumb in the eye hurts no matter how big you are, Gorilla.
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Nov 29, 2014 20:10
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i got a bork laser it will amaze ya my gizzat is phizzat so won't you just step back check it out y'all check it, check it out
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Nov 29, 2014 20:41
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Solomonic posted:How much prep time and/or horse meat do I have in this hypothetical, OP What sort of horse meat are we talking about? Rump steaks? T-bones?
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Nov 30, 2014 00:51
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Jim Cornette threatened to shoot him once but I think that would just make him itchy.
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Nov 30, 2014 00:56
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I would probably climb a tree and wait for the Baby Borks to turn purple and get tired. But they would probably just F5 the tree and beat me up anyway.
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Nov 30, 2014 01:06
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Gonzo McFee posted:Jim Cornette threatened to shoot him once but I think that would just make him itchy. also purple
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Nov 30, 2014 01:07
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You don't fight Brock Lesnars. The only way to beat them is with kisses.
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Nov 30, 2014 04:41
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Nov 30, 2014 04:49
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Rob Liefeld's "The Incredible Brock"
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Nov 30, 2014 07:02
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That's a fine lookin coat you got there.
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Nov 30, 2014 07:14
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Has Brock showed up in that WWE Superstars comic yet?
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Nov 30, 2014 07:30
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TheJoker138 posted:Has Brock showed up in that WWE Superstars comic yet? Yep.  
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Nov 30, 2014 09:47
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oh cool, theyre wrestling in a laser tag arena
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Nov 30, 2014 09:53
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So it looks like we have Cesaro swining Hornswoggle and Goldust kicking Brock in the dick? This is the best comic.
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Nov 30, 2014 09:58
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Jack Swagger's just hanging out high as gently caress.
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Nov 30, 2014 10:18
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I hope Goku makes it back in time from Snake way. 
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Nov 30, 2014 11:05
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i honestly wonder how much the main superstars artist is paid
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Nov 30, 2014 13:34
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Really digging Brock's fishnets in the second panel.
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Nov 30, 2014 15:11
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Cardboard Box posted:i honestly wonder how much the main superstars artist is paid Supposedly very, very little. From what I hear, the publisher Papercutz pays virtually nothing by the page, so that's pretty much what you'd get.
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Nov 30, 2014 17:14
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yeah that would totally explain what looks like a complete lack of effort
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Nov 30, 2014 17:16
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