"we gonna ignore the fact that i've GOT A HUGE BOOTY,"

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > "we gonna ignore the fact that i've GOT A HUGE BOOTY,"

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WetNightmare: by sebmojo

bootyus maximus

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 05:19

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 09:17

Escape From Noise

WetNightmare posted:

bootyus maximus

Are you not ignoring the fact that I've got a HUGE BOOTY?! :hist101:

Escape From Noise fucked around with this message at 04:30 on Aug 27, 2019

# ? Aug 25, 2019 07:11

Heather Papps: hello friend

friends, romans, contrymen, lend me your eyes. lay them upon MINE HUGE BOOTY

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 12:47

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

Et tu, booty?

# ? Aug 25, 2019 14:56

Stoner Sloth

sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut, Heather Papps,Prof Crocodile, knuthgrush, Ohtori Akio, Teapot, Saosyhant, Dumb Sex Parrot, w4ddl3d33, and nesamdoom!! - ty friends!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 14:57

Heather Papps: hello friend

beware the twerks of march

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 14:58

nut

pop, lock, stop, drop, roll and open up shop

# ? Aug 25, 2019 14:59

Heather Papps: hello friend

drat that butcher is a thick slice of meat you know what i mean? wanna take a bite outta that rump roast!

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 15:01

Stoner Sloth

Friends, Romans, countrymen, give me your attention.
I have come here to ignore Caesar's HUGE BOOTY, not to praise it.
The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft ignored with their BOOTY.

# ? Aug 25, 2019 15:04

Heather Papps: hello friend

From my grandfather Verus I learned good morals and the government of my temper.

From the reputation and remembrance of my father, modesty and a manly character.

From my mother, piety and beneficence, and abstinence, not only from evil deeds, but even from evil thoughts; and further, simplicity in my way of living, far removed from the habits of the rich. also, my HUGE BOOTY.

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 15:08

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

Let me have men about me that have a HUGE BOOTY;
Sleek-headed men and such as sleep o' nights:
Yond Cassius has a lean and hungry BOOTY;
He thinks too much: such men are dangerous.

# ? Aug 25, 2019 15:12

Heather Papps: hello friend

DIONYSUS
O, dear! O, dear! now I declare
I've got a bump upon my rump,

FROGS
Bre-klapklapklap, kl-ap, kl-ap.

DIONYSUS
But you, perchance, don't care.

FROGS
Bre-klapklapklap, kl-ap, kl-ap.

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 15:17

Stoner Sloth

This is the law of the BOOTYukon, and ever she makes it plain:
'Send not your weak and your foolish; send me your strong and your sane;
Strong for the HUGE rage of BOOTY; sane, for I harry them sore;
Send me me men girt for the combat, men who HUGE BOOTY ignore;

# ? Aug 25, 2019 15:21

Heather Papps: hello friend

4 Lo, thou [art] fair, my friend, lo, thou [art] fair, Thine eyes [are] doves behind thy veil, Thy hair as a row of the goats That have shone from mount Gilead,

2 Thy teeth as a row of the shorn ones That have come up from the washing, For all of them are forming twins, And a bereaved one is not among them.

3 As a thread of scarlet [are] thy lips, And thy speech [is] comely, As the work of the pomegranate [is] thy temple behind thy veil,

4 As the tower of David [is] thy neck, built for an armoury, The chief of the shields are hung on it, All shields of the mighty.

5 Thy two breasts [are] as two fawns, Twins of a roe, that are feeding among lilies.

6 Thy booty is huge, like the hill of Jorsala, and I can not ignore it.

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 15:37

Stoner Sloth

My mistress' HUGE BOOTY is nothing like the moon;

# ? Aug 25, 2019 16:11

Escape From Noise

Barking Gecko posted:

Et tu, booty?

# ? Aug 25, 2019 16:20

nut

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

# ? Aug 25, 2019 16:41

Escape From Noise

bee eater posted:

Jeeze. Sorry

# ? Aug 25, 2019 16:52

Heather Papps: hello friend

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Jeeze. Sorry

never apologize, i love you and your HUGE BOOTY

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 17:09

Escape From Noise

Heather Papps posted:

never apologize, i love you and your HUGE BOOTY

It's okay. I know I suck.

# ? Aug 25, 2019 17:11

nut

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Jeeze. Sorry

i was emptyquoting in agreement w ur good emptyquote!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 17:52

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

Can God create a BOOTY so HUGE even he cannot ignore it?

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Aug 25, 2019 18:31

Escape From Noise

bee eater posted:

i was emptyquoting in agreement w ur good emptyquote!

Ohhhhhh.

I'm slow

# ? Aug 26, 2019 05:45

Escape From Noise

magic cactus posted:

Can God create a BOOTY so HUGE even he cannot ignore it?

# ? Aug 26, 2019 05:55

Heather Papps: hello friend

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

For the purposes of discussion, Richard Dawkins described seven "milestones" on his spectrum of booty believability:[5]

1 Strong theist. 100% probability that the booty exists. In the words of C.G. Jung: "I do not believe, I know."
2 De facto theist. Very high probability but short of 100%. "I don't know for certain, but I strongly believe in the huge booty and live my life on the assumption that itis there."
3 Leaning towards theism. Higher than 50% but not very high. "I am very uncertain, but I am inclined to believe in you have a huge booty."
4 Completely impartial. Exactly 50%. "your bootys largeness or smallness are exactly equiprobable."
5 Leaning towards atheism. Lower than 50% but not very low. "I do not know whether your booty is huge but I'm inclined to be skeptical."
6 De facto atheist. Very low probability, but short of zero. "I don't know for certain but I think your booty is very improbable, and I live my life on the assumption that it is not huge."
7 Strong atheist. "I know there is no huge booty, with the same conviction as Jung knows there is one."

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 26, 2019 12:25

google THIS

Heather Papps posted:

For the purposes of discussion, Richard Dawkins described seven "milestones" on his spectrum of booty believability:[5]

1 Strong theist. 100% probability that the booty exists. In the words of C.G. Jung: "I do not believe, I know."
2 De facto theist. Very high probability but short of 100%. "I don't know for certain, but I strongly believe in the huge booty and live my life on the assumption that itis there."
3 Leaning towards theism. Higher than 50% but not very high. "I am very uncertain, but I am inclined to believe in you have a huge booty."
4 Completely impartial. Exactly 50%. "your bootys largeness or smallness are exactly equiprobable."
5 Leaning towards atheism. Lower than 50% but not very low. "I do not know whether your booty is huge but I'm inclined to be skeptical."
6 De facto atheist. Very low probability, but short of zero. "I don't know for certain but I think your booty is very improbable, and I live my life on the assumption that it is not huge."
7 Strong atheist. "I know there is no huge booty, with the same conviction as Jung knows there is one."

Richard Badonkadawkins

# ? Aug 26, 2019 12:28

Heather Papps: hello friend

google THIS posted:

Richard Badonkadawkins

you're telling me you... checks notes... you actually believe that i've got a huge booty? preposterous fairy tales.

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 26, 2019 12:43

Escape From Noise

Heather Papps posted:

For the purposes of discussion, Richard Dawkins described seven "milestones" on his spectrum of booty believability:[5]

1 Strong theist. 100% probability that the booty exists. In the words of C.G. Jung: "I do not believe, I know."
2 De facto theist. Very high probability but short of 100%. "I don't know for certain, but I strongly believe in the huge booty and live my life on the assumption that itis there."
3 Leaning towards theism. Higher than 50% but not very high. "I am very uncertain, but I am inclined to believe in you have a huge booty."
4 Completely impartial. Exactly 50%. "your bootys largeness or smallness are exactly equiprobable."
5 Leaning towards atheism. Lower than 50% but not very low. "I do not know whether your booty is huge but I'm inclined to be skeptical."
6 De facto atheist. Very low probability, but short of zero. "I don't know for certain but I think your booty is very improbable, and I live my life on the assumption that it is not huge."
7 Strong atheist. "I know there is no huge booty, with the same conviction as Jung knows there is one."

google THIS posted:

Richard Badonkadawkins

# ? Aug 26, 2019 13:31

Heather Papps: hello friend

"but john, i have fabulous tits! and yet you ignore them, for my HUGE BOOTY! i am a complete being , john, please, i need you to love all of me"

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 27, 2019 16:02

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

Heather Papps posted:

spectrum of booty believability:[5]

Taking notes for my next paper: Do I know She Has A Big Booty? Or Am I Just Ignoring Her: An Epistemic Disjunctivist Account of Mixalot-Backside Cases In Booty Science

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Aug 28, 2019 16:13

The Klowner: by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Arrr, he be a scurvy sea dog who ignores me booty

# ? Aug 28, 2019 18:34

Heather Papps: hello friend

"we gonna ignore the fact that i've GOT A HUGE BUTT," every day she screams this phase into the ether. her voice emanating from this house only to get lost in the void. knick knacks knocked off of shelves, umbrella stand tumbles onto the floor and I say nothing. I do not even look in her direction. "we gonna ignore the fact that i've GOT A HUGE BUTT," she screams again and again. the bookshelf has fallen over. Books are everywhere. I cannot acknowledge it. I MUST ignore the fact that she GOT A HUGE BUTT. Such is the Orphean deal that I have made with the gods. We no longer share a bed, There is no longer any room for me, but I can never utter why. I MUSE ignore the fact that SHE GOT A BIG BUTT else all i will be lost. Is a life where all I can do is ignore the face that she GOT A BIG BUTT even worth living? But the question is moot, as I am bound by duty and divine contract and I am a man of honor.

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:12