alnilam posted:

ATTENTION PEOPLE WHO DON'T THINK YOU LIKE EGG NOG
you might like this nog, i didn't ever like it, but this recipe is really good, and i also think nog that is "made with booze" is way better than nog that is mixed with booze, after the fact.

code:

1.5 cups melk - boil, then cool
   ^^^ carefully, dble-boiler or stir frequently so it doesn't scorch

5 egg yolks, beat
1 c powd sug, stir into egg yolks

3/4 tsp vanilla XXXtrakt
1/2 tsp cinnamon

1 cup vodka
1 cup brandy

combine all ingredes in a 1 L jar (make sure milk is cool! don't wanna cook them yolks)
put in frig and shake up every day for 4 days, ideally, before drinking. I've jumped the gun before at 1 or 2 days and itwas still good, but it does improve with age.

if you do the math you will see that this is roughly 50% liquor, meaning it's about 20% ABV or 40 proof.

in these pictures i amdoubling the recipe, and slightly downing the amount of booze from - i'm so sorry but i'm with my old parents and grandma so ya know


melk in double boiler


egg yokes and whites- save the whites in a fridge for tomorrow's breakfast!
how to separate them? crack an egge carefully and pour the yolk between each half until the white is nearly all gone, you can probably look this technique up on youtube idk it's not that hard tho imo


sugar lol


brandy and (not pictured) wodka


put in frig and shake every day! for 4 days. then drink.

alnilam posted:

quote:

Now, some of you are thinking "I don't even like eggnog!"  This isn't storebought eggnog.  This is an ancient ancestor of the eggnog you know; it's the great granddaddy of your store's eggnog, ranting and raving on the stoop about how the youth of the eggnog family have no respect for traditional values.  Think of it as custard for alcoholics.  I've never met a man or a goon who "didn't like eggnog" or didn't drink who didn't think Fuckin' Nog was the bee's knees:


The Fuckin' Nog recipe dates back to an issue of The Joy of Cooking from like the '50s, before people knew about cholesterol and science and poo poo.  Here's the recipe (brace yourself, this poo poo is gonna blow your mind):

quote:

Ingredients
    12 egg yolks
    1 pound confectioner’s sugar
    4-6 cups dark rum brandy
    8 cups heavy cream
    8 to 12 egg whites
    fresh grated nutmeg
    cinnamon

Directions

1.  Beat egg yolks until light in color. Gradually beat in the confectioner’s sugar. Add 2 cups rum very slowly, beating constantly. Let mixture stand covered for 1 hour to dispel the “eggy” taste.
    
2.  Add remaining rum and whipping cream, beating constantly.

3.  Refrigerate covered for 3 hours.
    
4.  Beat egg whites until stiff but not dry. Fold egg whites lightly into the other ingredients. Serve sprinkled with fresh nutmeg and cinnamon to taste.

I've tried dark rum, spiced rum, bourbon (make sure it's not sour mash), soco, brandy, and various blends of rum/bourbon, etc. and brandy takes the cake by far at my ~$25/handle midshelf pricepoint.  I use Paul Masson VS, an American brandy aged 3 years in wood (this is what sets it apart, I think).  There's no real payoff in spending more than that but don't get cheap, either.

First, you'll need to go to the store.  I'm making a 5x batch, to cover thanksgiving, christmas, me, my grandma, and some christmas gifts so I bought a lot of poo poo:

Some of you are probably mad about salmonella or something.  Well, shut the gently caress up.  If you're a big gay babby, or you want to serve it to your grandparents, you can buy pasteurized eggs in the shells that work just fine.  That link has a store locator.  Around here every kroger and harris teeter has them.  Also, I'm replacing half of the heavy cream with half and half this year.  To make it "healthier," for science.  I doubt anyone will know the difference.

Next, you're going to need to separate the yolks from the whites:

If you've never done this before, there are a few easy ways to do it.  Search for it on youtube.  I use the shell transfer method:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynsagWBXwC8
but there are some other nifty ways to do it.

Enjoy a cold beer while it spins in your stand-up mixer:

They need to blend until light in color, as the recipe says, to do some magic to the proteins.  If you rush this step you might end up with lumps of protein in your finished product.  Note that the yolks have doubled in volume already.

Since I'm making a huge batch we're going to need a bigger bowl:


(good help is invaluable)

Add the sugar a little at a time.  It'll be pretty thick at this point:


Now add 2 cups of booze a little at a time, blending constantly, then cover it with plastic to keep out the god damned fruit flies.  Pour another beer and retire to your study for one hour to reflect the excellent choices you are making tonight in the kitchen.


After an hour, add all of the dairy and then remaining booze (again, add the booze slowly, while stirring).  Use the full 6 cups of booze- trust me.  In my case, I needed a bigger bowl, again.  This time I upgraded to a turkey fryer:

It's almost full now.  Tomorrow it gets bottled

The last step, with the egg whites, is completely optional.  I normally just use the whites for macaroons and omelettes and whatnot, but if you want to age the nog and fold in the egg whites before serving you can just freeze them until it's time.

Ideally, age it at least 1-2 weeks in closed bottles in the refrigerator.  The first 1-2 weeks of aging smooth it out tremendously.  At first, you'll be questioning your judgement in using the maximum allowable booze but at two weeks you'll wish you'd used more.  I've used 6 cups of 100 proof liquor and this still held true.  Some people make their christmas nog a full year+ in advance but I generally start a few weeks before thanksgiving (since I break out a bottle at thanksgiving too).  For the first week be sure to give it a good shake once or twice a day.  This recipe with 6 cups of booze will fill two 1.75L bottles, with a bit extra for quality control.  Leave some air in the top of the bottle so it has some room to move when you shake it.

This is now a family tradition.  The first year I made a single batch.  The second year I doubled it, and the third year I doubled it again.  Last year, I started with a quadruple batch and had to make more.  I have a few friends and family who just want Fuckin' Nog for christmas, every year, but at thanksgiving so they can enjoy it through the holidays.  It's now expected at thanksgiving dinner and christmas brunch and my grandmother drinks it instead of wine for her nightcap until it's gone.  It's even better in coffee, and with the right kind of logic you can pass it off as breakfast.  As far as I know, every goon who's followed my lead is now tumbling down this same slippery slope.  I know one goon who drank a whole batch by himself the first time he made it and then had to make more for christmas.  Disgusting, right?  But once you try it, you'll understand.
 
 
fakeedit:


op success: the beer fridge is now the nog fridge

beer is now food, in the food fridge

Siluvayne posted:

that sounds good. we tried making it a few years ago but the recipe called for whipping the egg whites and adding them and it was kinda horrible so we haven't tried homemade nog again. sounds like aged egg nog is more my speed.

A LOVELY LAD posted:

ive never had nog but id be interested in trying it, drinking ales at the mo.

A LOVELY LAD posted:

Yeah i went to the fucken 24 hour shop to buy ingredients and it was fucken closed - what is this treachery