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FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Hello, GBS! These are the general SA forums rules. These are also the rules for GBS. Please read them.

Welcome to the Something Awful Forums!

We here on the Something Awful Forums are very elitist and strict assholes. We pride ourselves on running one of the most entertaining and troll-free forums on the internet. In fact, it’s so elite it has almost no users.
These forums are for discussion and comedy. Not every interesting or informative post is funny, and not every funny post has to be high-effort, but posts should do one of those things. These forums are great because the users here put a lot of work into making good posts, and if you’re here it’s probably because you want to be a part of that.

We charge a $10 fee to filter out folks not serious about adhering to the rules, and banning those who manage to slip through and break them. That $10 also keeps our servers running and the forums up, and you can help by buying Platinum membership for private messaging and more, archives access, or custom titles for yourself or others.

We are very serious about keeping our forums good, so please consider your account an investment and treat it accordingly. Read the rules, use common sense, and help keep the SA Forums the best – and soon-to-be last - message board on the internet!

How the Forums Work

Something Awful uses the classic discussion-board format. It’s divided into subforums (and sub-subforums), and in those are threads for discussing different topics. Any poster can post a new thread or respond to one. Threads are arranged chronologically, not based on which posts are upvoted. In fact, there is no up or down voting system.

Take the time to look around. There are a lot of forums, and odds are good that there’s a special forum for discussing in-depth whatever you want to talk about.

Good threads can be sent to the Comedy Goldmine to be preserved for all (note: not all) time. So don’t be afraid to post new threads you think will be funny or lead to good discussion. But bad threads will be sent to the Gas Chamber, and everyone will judge you.

Every forum has its own moderators, who work together with the admin team. If you post badly you will temporarily lose your ability to post, or be banned outright. But if you post well, you can be rewarded with free custom titles and other neat things. So please do the latter and not the former!

General Conduct

Lurk before posting! We cannot stress this enough. Each forum pretty much makes it clear from its name and description what is acceptable in there or not. Be sure you have the appropriate forum before posting. Take the time to get to know the forums and their cultures.

The Something Awful Golden Rule: Before you post, please ask yourself the following question: "Am I making a post which is either funny, informative, or interesting on any level?"

If you can answer "yes" to this, then please post. If you cannot, then refrain from posting. If you post anyway, the mods will probably punish you.

Forums are work-safe by default. With the exception of FYAD, forums are work-safe. If you want to post a not-work-safe image, link it and use the handy NWS tags. Text probably isn’t work-safe, so if your boss doesn’t want you to be reading about balls and the gently caress word, you probably should go do your job.

Posting Rules

Low Content Posts: Please do not make posts containing no content (ie, "first post," "hello, I'm new here," etc.). These just litter up the forums and with over 100,000 registered users, we need to eliminate these as much as possible. Some forums are more flexible than others for this. Basically, ask yourself: does this enhance the discussion, like emptyquoting a funny post to show you appreciate it, or does it detract from discussion, like drive-by posting a stupid catchphrase?

Worthless Posts: We do not care if you are drunk or high; please do not inform us of either. Please do not register gimmick accounts and make posts as a gimmick, unless they’re really, really funny (they aren’t). Please do not post crap asking us to vote for you on some website, give you referrals for free iPods / flatscreens / spare tires, or any other semi-spam things. We will not do your homework. Threads asking for donations to a charity are very rarely allowed, so contact a mod first.

Forum Fuckery: Don't gently caress up the forums or any user on the forums. If you post a malicious link (any URL with spyware or code designed to annoy people) you will be banned. Do not make plans to annoy / destroy other forums. Don’t talk about how much cooler you are than posters from another forum. We probably won’t ban you for it, but it makes you look like a chump.

Stay On Target: Try to use the appropriate thread tag for your post. This helps people find your thread and makes the forums more user friendly. Do not use the mod-only tags or you will be autobanned by the server. Those are the Hot, Attention, and Ban Me tags. We cannot stop you from being banned if you do that. We can’t remove or change the code. The machine will not let us. Please help.

Contained Conflict: Keep all flamewars and other arguments in FYAD. Don’t post your stupid offsite drama. We don’t care about who’s banned from your MMO guild, your Discord, or your forums spinoff IRC.

Respect the Mods and Writers: The moderators are here to keep the forums safe, sane, and secure. If they ask you to do something, please do it. Please do not harass or intentionally annoy the mods or insult the front page writers. If you do not like the mods or the moderation, feel free to not post here. That said, there is a forum for posting about moderation issues or suggestions, and that is the Questions, Comments, and Suggestions forum. The mods are users just like you, and they want to make the forums good. Don’t be an rear end in a top hat and they’re more than happy to hear you out.

Harass and Sass: Getting flamed in a thread because you’re being an idiot is not harassment. If you feel a poster or group of posters are being unfair to you, you can contact a mod, but they’ll probably laugh at you. Do not post others' personal information (phone number, addresses, emails, etc.). We will ban you. Try to stay out of other peoples' personal lives as well. Keep in mind there's a good distinction between the Internet and real life.

Account Ability: Only one person may use a forum account. Account sharing is a bannable offense, so please keep your password secure. If you’re having password problems, contact an administrator. Probation evasion is also bannable, so if you're on probation, don't try to post on another account.

Crazy Catchall: Please do not try to cleverly circumvent some rule listed here. These rules are general guidelines and are very flexible. Yes, moderation decisions are subjective. No, the rules are not always applied equally. We want to encourage good posts and discourage bad ones, and sometimes good posts break rules and bad posts don’t. If you get probated and didn’t break a rule, take the time to ask yourself if the post was bad.

FYAD Freedoms: You cannot post illegal material, harass others by posting their personal information or nude photos, spam thread subject lines to break the forum tables, harass any admins or mods, or start forum invasions in FYAD.

I Hate Speech: Offensive terms such as "human being" or "friend of the family" may or may not be bannable based on context. They are, in general, discouraged. These forums are not a safe space for racists and idiots. If you want someplace to post about how much you hate [minority group X], perhaps you can try the rest of the internet. This rule is completely, 100% subjective and is based on the mod reading the post at the time. Use at your own peril.

Image / File Rules

Keep all images work-safe. If you feel the need to post any pornographic or disgusting images, do it in FYAD. Please do not post any illegal (child porn, bestiality) images or else you will be banned. Do not post naked pictures of yourself. As a general rule, ask yourself "would my mother and boss be comfortable viewing this image?" when posting outside of FYAD.

Image size and linking. Try not to break tables. Obviously this can be tough, as many people now view the forums on many monitors and devices. There are two kinds of image tags: [img] and [timg]. [timg] creates a thumbnail that can be expanded, so if you’re not sure about the size of an image, use the [timg] tag. As a courtesy, consider linking giant gifs — especially if you're posting more than one at a time. Don’t leech images. The SA Forums have an image attachment function, but it’s not commonly used. Most images posted here are hosted on Imgur, but other image hosting sites are acceptable, as long as they’re designed to share images on other websites (for example tumblr or Twitter). Images hosted on other random sites can be slow to load, and could be deleted at any time, spoiling your wonderful posts. If you know of a particularly good or bad image host that should or should not be used, contact the admins.

No warez. No warez, no cracks, no CD codes, no illegal programs that are used to either crack software or perform any malicious activity. Don't post links, ask for links to download, or otherwise discuss illegal copies of copyrighted works, including movies, books, software, etc. You may find threads to discuss game emulation, do not post links to ROMs or ISOs or similar in those threads.

Your posting signature. Keep in mind that everybody on the forums has to see your sig file over and over every time you post. Don’t be obnoxious with it. Most forums have sigs off by default, but some allow them. You always have the option to turn off seeing others’ signatures.

What If I Get Banned?

If you break a semi-minor rule, you will be put on probation and temporarily lose posting ability. If you are banned, you will have to pay $10 again to re-register, and will lose your custom title and Platinum status. Very serious offenders may be perma-banned and be unable to re-register. If you are perma-banned and register another account, we will find it and ban you again.

I Don't Agree With a Mod or Admin Decision!

If you would like to inquire about a particular mod or admin action, we welcome any questions in the Questions, Comments, and Suggestions forum. Please be civil, explain your point, and detail your opinion on it. We encourage questions and criticism of any mod or admin you like as long as you’re not a dick.

This Place Sounds Like a Ripoff!

It isn’t. These are the best forums on the internet. We are very serious about this. They provide a level of discussion and comedy you cannot find anywhere else. Other sites may be more popular, but few maintain Something Awful’s consistently high quality. It is very much worth the money. We want you to be a part of our community, and we are always looking for new people with something to contribute. You should post here.

If you do not agree with these rules, please do not register an account. If you are not sure about buying an account, please do not purchase one. The only people we want to register accounts are those who really want to be here and will respect the rules and other forum members.

Current GBS Mods:

Smythe - smythe@somethingawful.com
genesplicer
Mega64
Jeffrey of YOSPOS

fau was here

FactsAreUseless fucked around with this message at 07:55 on Apr 1, 2020

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Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Dec 22, 2005

GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS
no loitering

Genesplicer
Oct 19, 2002

I give your invention the worst grade imaginable: An A-minus-minus!

Total Clam
As I said before, Don't Be A Dick.

Mega64
May 23, 2008

I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.
Just because the President of the United States says it doesn't mean you should. Racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, and the like will still be punished harshly! If you see this happen, report it!

Mega64
May 23, 2008

I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.
You guys have run "OP's mom" jokes into the ground to the point they're not funny anymore. Gonna start throwing 6ers for them now.

Mega64
May 23, 2008

I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.
The mods and admins feel serious political threads are better suited for Debate & Discussion or C-SPAM. Any serious political thread in GBS from now on will be gassed or moved to C-SPAM on mod discretion. We still encourage people to post goofy political poo poo, though.

Mega64
May 23, 2008

I took the octopath less travelered,

And it made one-eighth the difference.
I'm banning all negative talk about hexagons for the rest of 2016.

Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Dec 22, 2005

GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS
Obviously our new president is on the forefront of everyone's mind, but I think everyone would be better off here if trump threads did not make up, say, a third of all active threads. I'm going to gas some of them - my intent is not to shut down discussion, merely corral it.

Genesplicer
Oct 19, 2002

I give your invention the worst grade imaginable: An A-minus-minus!

Total Clam
A quick notice: if you choose to report someone, that is great, however, there is a space titled: User Comments / Explanation: Please fill it out. We are far less likely to act on a report if you don't explain why you reported it.

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
PM me if you see something particularly bad that you think I might miss which could be a lot

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer
Like Jose said, if you guys see anything, PM me and I'll check it out. You'll probably be wrong because I'm smarter than you but I'll at least look at it and let you know

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
If you complain about a 6 hour probation I hate you and will take it into account for future punishment

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
Blockbuster video needs more traffic so I'll be moving movie threads there

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer
I will probate anyone who dislikes Norm Macdonald for 6hrs maximum, and I have an itchy trigger finger for this

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
Emptyquoting stuff is fine and if you quote something with "not an emptyquote" or similar after i'll probate you if i see it because its obnoxious

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer
Anyone who says Skylark isn't a girl is going straight to hell (I will probate them for a day)

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
I've seen a couple of posts recently with people claiming they were called a nazi or racist or whatever for something and if i see it and you can't link an example when i ask when I'll choose a probation length at random for it. This goes for any sub forum you post in

Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Dec 22, 2005

GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS
Please don't hesitate to PM me if you ever have any questions or comments about the forums or GBS! I care a lot and will be happy to respond to concerns that take up more space than the tiny report box.

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer
please dont hesitate to jump up my rear end

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Don't be a gross creep. "But I'm not a gross creep!" you say. Great, then you don't have to care about this rule.

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo
While the current Washington administration is insanely entertaining, political threads that involve the Dotard in chief, his lackies, and other fascinating poo poo belong in CSPAM. They’re good people, go post there!

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer

Burt Sexual posted:

While the current Washington administration is insanely entertaining, political threads that involve the Dotard in chief, his lackies, and other fascinating poo poo belong in CSPAM. They’re good people, go post there!
I heard that Trump guy is a real clown, if you catch my drift !!!

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO
Feb 28, 1985


Low Content Posts in photoshop threads suck, please don't make them. Thank you citizens.

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo
Reports that have a blank reason field are at an extreme high risk of being ignored. Please complete the prompt with the rules being violated. Thanks for your non lazy participation.

Kawasaki Nun
Jul 16, 2001

by Reene
I'm in charge.

Top Hats Monthly
Jun 22, 2011


People are people so why should it be, that you and I should get along so awfully blink blink recall STOP IT YOU POSH LITTLE SHIT

Kawasaki Nun posted:

I'm in charge.

hell yeah dude...whats the rules?

Shadow0
Jun 16, 2008


If to live in this style is to be eccentric, it must be confessed that there is something good in eccentricity.

Grimey Drawer
All posters are required to wear goofy hats while posting. We'll know if you're breaking this rule.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

I can still close and open this thread, that rocks.

e: I'm not the person who opened it, I just wanted to see if I could do it once it was open. Permabanned for forums fuckery.

precision
May 7, 2006

by VideoGames
Ich bin ein moderater

HOTLANTA MAN
Jul 4, 2010

by Hand Knit
Lipstick Apathy
lol im a mod

Resting Lich Face
Feb 21, 2019


This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.
oo whats this

Catpain Slack
Apr 1, 2014

BAAAAAAH
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1jZi7OmRsA

Fur20
Nov 14, 2007

すご▞い!
君は働か░い
フ▙▓ズなんだね!
new gbs rule:

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010
I cant keep track of all these new rules

Aaronicon
Oct 2, 2010

A BLOO BLOO ANYONE I DISAGREE WITH IS A "BAD PERSON" WHO DESERVES TO DIE PLEEEASE DONT FALL ALL OVER YOURSELF WHITEWASHING THEM A BLOO BLOO
Not like this

Zeta Acosta
Dec 16, 2019

#essereFerrari
1.- The remaining mods must immediately hand over their powers to Lowtax

2.- The remaining iks and mods are united to initiate the historic and responsible mission of fighting for the liberation of the Homeland and preventing our forum from continuing under the the old mods yoke; and the restoration of order and institutionality;

3.- Posters and shitposters can be sure that the economic and social achievements they have achieved to date will not undergo fundamental changes;

4.- The press, broadcasting radios and television channels addicted to the old mods must suspend their informative activities as of this moment. Otherwise they will receive aerial and ground punishment;

5.- The people of SA must stop posting in order to avoid innocent victims.

McSpanky
Jan 16, 2005






6.-LIVE FROM NEW YORK IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT!!

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GRINDCORE MEGGIDO
Feb 28, 1985


Casting reduce balls in GBS is prohibited.

Memo: don't forget to relock the GBS rules thread this time

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