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ITT we speculate about Donald Trump's daily morning routine as President of the United States on an average day in Spring 2017 in the style below  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46-WNPlCYsg I will begin... Scene: 4:30am EST Monday May 1st 2017 * Washington D.C. - The White House, President's Bedroom (Donald Trump lies awake in bed, the phone rings)  4:35am: Wake up call from Kellyanne
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Jan 17, 2017 16:31
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| # ? May 13, 2024 14:07 |
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3:20am: the swarm of hive minded insects begin pouring into Trump's room from every crack and crevice in the walls, ceiling and floor. They scurry to the Trump skin suit hanging from a metal hook in the corner, filling it in with their bodies. Per instruction, Melania stands in the corner, eyes closed, until the process is completed. 3:25am: Trump, now reconstituted, puts on suit, hair, false eyes and teeth. 3:30am-2:20am next day: Resumes Tweeting.
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Jan 17, 2017 16:46
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11:00 AM: Snort YUGEST line of coke off of the Resolute Desk 11:30 AM: Daily piss drinking session 12:00 PM: Fantasize about daughter 1:00: Lunch 2:00: Tweet 6:00: Jerk off to Putin's official portrait
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Jan 17, 2017 17:33
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5:00am - call Paul Ryan into the office and watch him do curls for 2 hours
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Jan 17, 2017 17:42
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10:20am: Calls emergency meeting regarding the production of a Presidential golf cart *tweets about  playing golf in Palm Springs whenever other people speak during the meeting*
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Jan 17, 2017 17:43
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7:00 PM: Goes down into White House basement where Chris Christie is being held down on a metal table, his limbs spread apart, strapped down, doped up from an IV drip flowing down into his jugular. His left arm and right leg have been completely amputated and lay exposed, with corruption evident. Trump walks over, picks up a hand saw and cuts another millimeter of flesh from the stump of Christie's left leg, popping the boned out of the slice with his index finger, then putting it between two slices of rye with mustard, consumes it voraciously and licks his fingers, saying "see you tomorrow, Chrissie  ".
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Jan 17, 2017 17:53
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From the desk of President Donald J. Trump: EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A URL INTO THE BROWSER. ITS RT.COM AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, VLADIMIR PUTIN. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME UKRAINIAN BASTARDS OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY HACKED THE DNC. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN THE WHITE HOUSE AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE PEOPLE IN POLITICS CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JEKRS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE LINES AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND THE RESIDENCE LESS LONELY BY TWEETING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNING
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Jan 17, 2017 18:07
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| # ? May 13, 2024 14:07 |
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No doubt there will be an hour briefing every day where his assistants just tell him everything that was written about him in since their previous meeting, 4 hours ago.
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Jan 17, 2017 18:09
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