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OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc
Jazz Jackrabbit

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Rasta_Al
Jul 14, 2001

she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.
Fun Shoe
Johnny Quantum - corrupt police chief of delta quadrant galaxy 7

Blood Shart
Sep 23, 2010

Ai'hm Ghey - Rugged nomad from a theocratic desert planet looking to gently caress his way across the stars.

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc
Jan Nike

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Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc
Reginald P. Linux XLIV

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc
Buzzfeed Hamilton Slack

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Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc
Coca-Cola Cohen

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc
Trib Sappho

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer

Nigmaetcetera posted:

Ortho Bogglin

Ortho is the foppish, 6" tall, down-on-his-luck merchant prince of the Aylmer Empire. He complains constantly, emits a foul odor, and is constantly attempting to betray his comrades, but they keep him around anyway because he's funny and smoking his blood crystals acts as both a euphoriant and a truth serum, very useful for interrogating prisoners, and for just passing the time during long space voyages. Please note that he is kept restricted to his quarters (the captain's sock drawer) whenever representatives of the Kovvar Alliance are onboard, because the Kovvari can't help but laugh when they see the Aylmer due to a passing resemblance they have to Kovvari genitalia. Ortho eats only feces. This is not a normal diet for his species, he's just sick in the head.

How you know so much about the Kovvar Alliance? Are you a spy?

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post
Sappho Scissorix: Leader of an elite special forces unit/softball team from the planet Amazonia. Six foot five, muscled, covered in leather. Travels with her team and their band of adopted pit bull sidekicks.

Elan Mask: Head of a mysterious tech cult that praises a deity know as "the disruptor." All acolytes must spend hours at their terminals "disrupting" all services in the known universe.

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins

JiveHonky posted:

How you know so much about the Kovvar Alliance? Are you a spy?

I spent several years I'd rather not describe in detail as a prostitute on Kovvar Prime.

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Dave_Indeed
Feb 22, 2004

by FactsAreUseless
Phillip Shamrock.

He could have a green irish clover space suit and talk poo poo about loving up aliens from his job in the mechanic bay of the ship, knowing god drat well enough that noones taking him on any drat scouting mission to the surface.

Shut the gently caress up Phillip.

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