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GoodyTwoShoes
Oct 26, 2013
I am possibly alone in my opinion that action movies are a funnier than most intentional comedy (plus there's no laugh track). However, this movies is hilarious. Stunts that defy gravity, physics, and the very laws of plumbing. You should watch it.

Okay, something about the plot: Bad person has invented a gadget that can take control of satellites, and decides the best use of this is to crash them one by one to blackmail the world into dismantling their spy agencies. He starts by crashing one right next to Gibbons' current recruitment diner, resulting in a huge fireball.

The CIA acquired the gadget, but it gets stolen in a lovely sequence with Donny Yen as the terrorist, Xiang. Xander Cage is then hunted down and recruited to retrieve the gadget for the CIA as revenge for Gibbons' death. Many stunts ensue. Smart remarks were made, but I honestly don't remember any lines, and I just watched it today. No "Xander zone" references or catch phrases.

Plenty of gratuitous semi-nude-lady-parts, but approximately squat for man-parts to ogle. Multiple international action heros and athletes, and all we get is Diesel shirtless for 30 seconds. Gee.

Overall, lots of fun. Diesel is goofy, Yen is amazing, Tony Jaa was underutilized, and the zero-g fights were wonderful. 4 stars from me.

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Tiny Brontosaurus
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax
The best part is when Xander Cage invents dirt-surfing. Or maybe the sea motorcycles. Or the Ice Cube cameo, which I'm not putting in spoilers because you and I are the only people to have ever seen this movie, OP.

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