Why did the programmer quit his job?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > Why did the programmer quit his job?

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Crime on a Dime: Nov 28, 2006

# ? Jul 8, 2017 07:32

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# ? May 3, 2024 12:43

Agile Vector: May 21, 2007; scrum bored

he quit by mistake
the accounting app he wrote?
broke. off by one

# ? Jul 8, 2017 13:18

ADINSX: Sep 9, 2003; Wanna run with my crew huh? Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?

Three programmers walk into a bar. The bartender addresses the group: "Y'all want a a drink?". The first programmer says "I don't know", the second programmer says "I don't know" the third programmer says "yes"

# ? Jul 8, 2017 16:48

OldAlias: Nov 2, 2013

ADINSX posted:

Three programmers walk into a bar. The bartender addresses the group: "Y'all want a a drink?". The first programmer says "I don't know", the second programmer says "I don't know" the third programmer says "yes"

"explain this joke" was a question for a logic assignment

OldAlias fucked around with this message at 19:36 on Jul 8, 2017

# ? Jul 8, 2017 19:29

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

how many programmers does it take to tell a joke?

two. one to deliver and one to add a comment to the punchline

# ? Jul 8, 2017 19:35

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

OldAlias posted:

"explain this joke" was a question for a logic assignment

It's AND? or am I missing something

# ? Jul 8, 2017 19:56

Poopernickel: Oct 28, 2005; electricity bad; Fun Shoe

Captain Foo posted:

I can tell you a tcp joke, if you're ready

he might hear the punchline first

# ? Jul 8, 2017 20:59

OldAlias: Nov 2, 2013

Captain Foo posted:

It's AND? or am I missing something

that's p much it. there's only two answers to the question "do you all want a drink" so "I don't know" could be parsed as "Yes or No." so in boolean logic ((yes or no) and (yes or no) and (yes)) = yes

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:05

Sweevo: Nov 8, 2007; i sometimes throw cables away

i mean straight into the bin without spending 10+ years in the box of might-come-in-handy-someday first

im a fucking monster

i thought it was about exceptions. if you can't handle an exception then you just keep throwing it up the chain

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:07

OldAlias: Nov 2, 2013

i suppose there multiple, equally unfunny interpretations

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:12

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

OldAlias posted:

i suppose there multiple, equally unfunny interpretations

yospos, bithc

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:22

StinkBeard: Aug 26, 2003

They all took "y'all" literally. If the first one didn't want a drink the answer would be no. The second one understood that, but didn't know what the third one would answer. The third one could infer what the first two wanted so he answered for all of them.

That's my unfunny explanation of a joke that's sperg-funny, a subset of all funny jokes.

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:27

StinkBeard: Aug 26, 2003

Also,

Sweevo posted:

i know a UDP joke but you might not get it

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:29

ADINSX: Sep 9, 2003; Wanna run with my crew huh? Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?

StinkBeard posted:

They all took "y'all" literally. If the first one didn't want a drink the answer would be no. The second one understood that, but didn't know what the third one would answer. The third one could infer what the first two wanted so he answered for all of them.

That's my unfunny explanation of a joke that's sperg-funny, a subset of all funny jokes.

Yes, that's the joke.

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:42

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

ADINSX posted:

Yes, that's the joke.

Clever!

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:44

ADINSX: Sep 9, 2003; Wanna run with my crew huh? Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?

When I was told the joke they were "logicians" which makes the punchline a bit easier to get but I changed them to "programmers" because funny computer forum

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:46

ADINSX: Sep 9, 2003; Wanna run with my crew huh? Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?

I'm sure everyone in YOSPOS has heard this but regardless: When Swiss computer scientist Niklaus Wirth was asked about his name, he replied that Europeans could pronounce it properly, but Americans tended to say "Nickels Worth". He explained "In Europe I'm called by name and in America I'm called by value" :haw:

# ? Jul 8, 2017 21:51

Doom Mathematic: Sep 2, 2008

Agile Vector posted:

he quit by mistake
the accounting app he wrote?
broke. off by one

# ? Jul 8, 2017 22:58

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

ADINSX posted:

I'm sure everyone in YOSPOS has heard this but regardless: When Swiss computer scientist Niklaus Wirth was asked about his name, he replied that Europeans could pronounce it properly, but Americans tended to say "Nickels Worth". He explained "In Europe I'm called by name and in America I'm called by value"

I had not heard this, thank u for the lol

# ? Jul 9, 2017 00:52

RISCy Business: Jun 17, 2015; bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork bork; Fun Shoe

OldAlias posted:

multiple, equally unfunny interpretations

# ? Jul 9, 2017 03:29

wide stance: Jan 28, 2011; If there's more than one way to do a job, and one of those ways will result in disaster, then he will do it that way.

code:

void CallFunction(string text1) {
    if (!String.IsNullorEmpty(text1) != true && String.IsNullorEmpty(text1) == false)
        //Phew, we're ok to proceed
        bool flag = false;
        CallDatabase(flag);
}

# ? Jul 9, 2017 05:19

wide stance: Jan 28, 2011; If there's more than one way to do a job, and one of those ways will result in disaster, then he will do it that way.

ADINSX posted:

I'm sure everyone in YOSPOS has heard this but regardless: When Swiss computer scientist Niklaus Wirth was asked about his name, he replied that Europeans could pronounce it properly, but Americans tended to say "Nickels Worth". He explained "In Europe I'm called by name and in America I'm called by value"

I'm sure this is totally real and not completely invented bullshit. Totally make sense since an obvious variation of Nicholaus would be completely foreign.

# ? Jul 9, 2017 05:28

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

wide stance posted:

I'm sure this is totally real and not completely invented bullshit. Totally make sense since an obvious variation of Nicholaus would be completely foreign.

get out of yospos

# ? Jul 9, 2017 05:41