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The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Tips for growing and breeding shoes
 
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EorayMel

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
 1) Remember to never feed your shoes after midnight. Otherwise, they will most likely mutate into gloves, which have infinitely less value and a shallower market. They prefer a diet high in protein.

2) Many shoes suffer from premature ejaculacetion, and sometimes you must artificially inseminate the female shoes yourself in order to get a pregnant shoe and thus increase your stock.

3) While shoes can technically be okay in cramped quarters, giving shoes as much room as possible to move about and exercise is paramount to high-quality shoe breeds.

What other tips should I follow?

* # ? Mar 21, 2018 01:19
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# ? May 17, 2024 18:45
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rump buttman

I just wish I had time for one more bowl of chili



 mink oil the laces for healthy aglets. I was able to get my peepers on an official Westminster Kicks Club Nationals scoring sheet, and aglets represent a whopping 11% of total presentation.

it’ll help you sell to the highend clientele , thus improving your margins and prestige.

* # ? Mar 21, 2018 01:23
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Manifisto


 weaning loafers is notoriously difficult, they will bawl for hours when separated from their mother's grommets. I suggest you supplement the milk with a liquid diet first, blending two parts tube sock to one part foot is a good ratio

* # ? Mar 21, 2018 02:12
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Kthulhu5000

by R. Guyovich
No one has yet produced a viable crossing of Dutch clogs and Japanese wooden geta platform sandals. At least, not one that wasn't a premature style abomination that self-terminated upon its physical realization.

So you might be the first to do it, but I'd advise against trying for it on ethical breeding grounds and council guidelines.

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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
* # ? Mar 21, 2018 02:15
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Dick Bastardly

Muttley is SKYNET!!!
Have you considered adopting a pair of shoes from your local goodwill?


Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!

Lovely sig by the masterful Matoi Ryuko, thanks!
* # ? Mar 21, 2018 04:20
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Rushi

by Smythe
he was a sk8tr shoe she said c u lat8r shoe

* # ? Mar 21, 2018 11:15
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SkeletonizedFish
 The trick to maximise profits is to bring back a breed on the verge of extinction. Try breeding for Velcro.

* # ? Mar 21, 2018 13:35
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Bacon Taco

Now with extra narwhal meat!
HAIKOOLIGAN
Growing a healthy shoe tree in your breeding zone is useful for some breeds, which prefer to mature above the floor.

* # ? Mar 24, 2018 23:18
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# ? May 17, 2024 18:45
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Putty

HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS
ever see that scene where Dorothy taps the red slippers together? shoe copulation

* # ? Mar 25, 2018 01:55
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Tips for growing and breeding shoes