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Eau de MacGowan
May 12, 2009

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THE SOCCER NIPPON DAIHYO SAMURAI BURUU WORLD CUP 2018 THREAD!!!

2018 finds Japanese football at something of a nadir. Though a traditional powerhouse in Asia, having won the Asian Cup a record four times, they failed to win in 2015 and are in turmoil leading up to this tournament. This is mostly down to this guy:



Vahid Halilhodžić managed Japan from 2015 to May 2018. Having enjoyed relatively successful tenures with Ivory Coast and Algeria on the international stage, he was expected to enhance Japan's decent pool of talent. One of his masterstrokes to try and achieve this was to exclude Shinji Kagawa, Keisuke Honda and Shinji Okazaki (more on these three later) from the team and call up players from the Japanese domestic league's second division instead. He said this was because he did not want any egos in his locker room, but trying to find an ego in a Japanese locker room is like trying to find water in the desert. He then decided to send out his C team to face South Korea in the final of the East Asian Cup (less prestigious than the Asian cup), promptly got spanked 4-1 and then seemed to genuinely not understand why there might be any bad blood between Japan and Korea and why losing to Korea 4-1 was frankly unacceptable to the FA and the majority of the nation. Having got Japan to Russia relatively comfortably he then got fired out of the blue in May. Why? No-one knows. There's rumours of corruption and such, but Halihodzhi himself is literally suing the FA right now not for money but simply to discover the official reason for his sacking.



He was replaced by Akira Nishino, a former player who had twelve caps for the country in the seventies and then something of an erratic career managing teams in the J-League since. Japan is his first national team managed, and he's had a whopping two matches in charge, in which he's lost 2-0 to Ghana and 2-0 to Switzerland. He has at least recalled the best players, but if/when it all goes tits up little blame can be placed at his door.

SQUAD

Goalkeepers: Eiji Kawashima (Metz), Masaaki Higashiguchi (Gamba Osaka), Kosuke Nakamura (Kashiwa Reysol).

Defenders: Yuto Nagatomo (Galatasaray), Tomoaki Makino (Urawa Reds), Wataru Endo (Urawa Reds), Maya Yoshida (Southampton), Hiroki Sakai (Marseille), Gotoku Sakai (Hamburg), Gen Shoji (Kashima Antlers), Naomichi Ueda (Kashima Antlers).

Midfielders: Makoto Hasebe (Eintracht Frankfurt), Keisuke Honda (Pachuca), Takashi Inui (Eibar), Shinji Kagawa (Dortmund), Hotaru Yamaguchi (Cerezo Osaka), Genki Haraguchi (Fortuna Dusseldorf), Takashi Usami (Fortuna Dusseldorf), Gaku Shibasaki (Getafe), Ryota Oshima (Kawasaki Frontale).

Forwards: Shinji Okazaki (Leicester), Yuya Osako (Werder Bremen), Yoshinori Muto (Mainz).

OVERVIEW

If you're an American and you haven't 23andMe'd yourself to discover the Spanish/German/Brazilian blood you undoubtedly have so you can do some serious rooting for the favourites, you might consider Japan as a roughly analogous counterpart to USA. Both are rich first world countries with big populations that can offer its youth the luxury and time to develop skill at sports, but crucially lack a historical cultural identity, philosophy and understanding of football. Both Japan and America can put out 11 decent athletes, but these athletes come unstuck against footballers from South America or Europe. Japan's particular stigma is a lack of unorthodoxy and improvisation. The Japanese are very good at baseball because in baseball the batter bats and the pitchers pitches, and the batter can practice nothing but batting and the pitcher can practice nothing but pitching until they're ruthlessly perfect at it, but soccer requires a little bit of everything and the knowledge of when to apply it, and furthermore then the necessary arrogance to apply it. Too often the Japanese will choose the safe pass, or indeed try and Arsenal it into the net instead of someone stepping up and putting his loving foot through it.

KEEPER(s)



This is it. This is Eiji Kawashima. He is 35 years old and has been Japan's keeper since probably the PS2 first came out. The only way anyone else is going to be in goal is if Russian cops mistake him for a gay and beat him senseless. He is OK. It says something that four years later, having wrote the Japan thread last time, the only thing I can think to say of him is the same thing: after the 2011 tsunami and nuclear meltdown, Belgian fans took to taunting him by chanting "Kawashima? Fukushima!" at him until he flipped out

DEFENDERS

Centre back has been a weakness for Japan for some time. Although thanks to a diet of red meat and milk replacing fish and rice the physical disparity between the Japanese and other teams has lessened, they can still get bossed about and outjumped by brutes and they can still get outsmarted by cunning swarthy mediterraneans. Thankfully the nightmare of Tulio Tanaka and his "I'm so Brazilian look at me, my mam was Brazilian I swear" histrionics has passed, but the centre of defence will be anchored around this guy:



Maya Yoshida plays for Southampton in the English Premier League. They were one place above relegation this season. He was (iirc) in and out of the team, and can be lumbering and slow on the turn. Please correct me saints fans on this.



Yuto Nagatomo usually plays at left back for the national team, but he can also play at right back at a pinch. He currently plays for Galatasaray in Turkey, but played for Inter Milan in Italy before that. He was decent, but stamina is a huge part of his game and he is 31 years old. Looking at the previous two friendlies, he is going to be more involved in attacking than defending, so expect to see him bombing forward on the left looking to get in a cross or to try and provoke a penalty in the corner of the box.

MIDFIELDERS

Midfield is unquestionably Japan's strongest asset. They have a group of competent unselfish team players who are prepared to run their arses off and share the ball between them, and their transition between defence and attack can at times be fluid and creative.



Makoto Hasebe is Japan's captain and has enjoyed a lengthy career in Germany at several midtable sides. He is a determined defensive midfielder, but much like Nagatomo he is 34 and his stamina is fading.



Keisuke Honda has either fulfilled his potential or has fallen short of it. He played for AC Milan then moved to Mexico, where he currently plays for Pachuca. It's difficult to judge him. He shares many similarities with David Beckham, in that he's very concerned with his brand, and was sure to build that brand, and cultivated an image, and dyed his hair, and was careful to wear two watches, because that was the Keisuke Honda thing... But it never really went anywhere, arguably much like David Beckham. Like David Beckham, he might have been better. Like David Beckham, he's a slowish player with a good eye for a pass and pretty good at dead balls. Important for the Japanese team - sometimes - is that he is the one willing to step forward and put his loving foot through it, but also important is that he's not that good at putting his foot through it.

Excluding him for his 'arrogance' was definitely a mistake however. He is definitely unique in the Japanese team, for better or for worse.



Bingin' Shinji Kagawa is Japan's arrabbiata attacante Gx upper 90 pivot creative fulcrum. Why he got kicked out of the team I'll never know. He listened to David Moyes for fucks sakes. He played for Dortmund in Germany, then for Manchester United, then for Dortmund again. Cool facts about him include that he apparently hosed a porn star on a dare, and then after having to endure a season with David Moyes tried to eat himself to death.

Another crucial fact is that he has won 1 (one) more Premier League title than Steven Gerrard.

FORWARD(s)



This is it. This is Shinji Okazaki. He plays for Leicester City in the Premier League. Although he has proven to Jamie Vardy that Japanese people are in fact human beings, his game is almost entirely dependent on having a striking partner with him. He'll run his arse off and fight for every ball and square it, but when he has two J-League cloggers with him instead of Vardy and Riyad Mahrez his effectiveness is limited.

It is also, interestingly enough, crucial to note that he has won 1 (one) more Premier League Title than Steven Gerrard.

OUTLOOK

I'll honestly be surprised if Japan get out of their group. They are paired with Poland, Senegal and Columbia, so it is no group of death, but the managerial chaos and the sudden reintroduction of Kagawa, Honda and Okazaki have thrown the team out of line. The two friendlies have been underwhelming. Take as a case in point this particular run of play in the Ghana match that led to the second goal:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TX_SnpTagMU&t=435s

A long ball, a header, and another long ball, and the team's spine completely comes apart. But what can you do? This is the product of several years of mismanagement, and sometimes you have to reap what you sow.

But you know who doesn't fear the reaper?

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Tortilla Maker
Dec 13, 2005
Un Desmadre A Toda Madre
Does the Brazilian still play for Team Nippon?

Vegetable
Oct 22, 2010

Nice OP, thanks

Sneaks McDevious
Jul 29, 2010

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN
A good OP, OP.

Fascinating to see that the Japanese team is wildly more successful that much of the current and former Liverpool team.

Ka0
Sep 16, 2002

:siren: :siren: :siren:
AS A PROUD GAMERGATER THE ONLY THING I HATE MORE THAN WOMEN ARE GAYS AND TRANS PEOPLE
:siren: :siren: :siren:
I hope they manage to get somewhere this WC op.

cowboy beepboop
Feb 24, 2001

great op, op

Eau de MacGowan
May 12, 2009

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Ka0 posted:

I hope they manage to get somewhere this WC op.

So do I, but I think the damage has been done alas. They're playing Paraguay on Tuesday and I think a lot rests on that game. Another loss will just kill their morale dead.

edogawa rando
Mar 20, 2007

The bigger long-term problem for Japan, IMO, is a lack of a composure and ruthlessness in front of the goal. I know it's just one guy, but look at Muto's goal scoring record - in the Bundesliga for Mainz, he has a fairly respectable rate of a goal every 3 games or so. It's not great, but it's hardly terrible either, and would probably make him the most reliable, on paper at least, among the Japanese forwards. But in 20-odd appearances for Japan, he only has 2 goals. You can perhaps write that off as international defences being tighter, etc., but from 1 in 3 to 1 in 10? Come the gently caress on.


Also, my ma's Japanese (Tohoku pride!) and my koseki states I am from Shiogama, so I'm obliged to support these diligent losers.

Peel
Dec 3, 2007

drew these guys in the office pool so I hope you're completely wrong, op

Eau de MacGowan
May 12, 2009

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Peel posted:

drew these guys in the office pool so I hope you're completely wrong, op

they looked much better against Paraguay op, in which they came from behind to win 4-2. Kagawa scored once and provided two assists, and winger Takashi Inui stepping up to put his loving foot through it twice from outside the area

but gently caress me there's some dodgy hair going on



Vagabundo posted:

Also, my ma's Japanese (Tohoku pride!) and my koseki states I am from Shiogama, so I'm obliged to support these diligent losers.

I used to live 20 minutes from Shiogama. Best sushi I ever had in Japan was there.

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008


Gravy Boat 2k
I was studying abroad in Japan back in 2014 when the WC came around. For no better reason than that, they've my support through the event. Gonna take a lot of luck, but I believe in miracles.

Go Pikachu.

Rakosi
May 5, 2008

D&D: HASBARA SQUAD
NO-QUARTERMASTER


From the river (of Palestinian blood) to the sea (of Palestinian tears)
I have heard down the grapevine that my football-loving ex girlfriend is in Russia for the world cup so I will be watching to see if she's in the crowd.

edogawa rando
Mar 20, 2007

World Cup as good as won, lads.

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008


Gravy Boat 2k

Vagabundo posted:

World Cup as good as won, lads.

Has yet to be proven otherwise!

Wengy
Feb 6, 2008

Im quite impressed by Japan so far. They looked so incredibly awful in their friendly against us, so this is nice to see.

pidan
Nov 6, 2012


The last part of this Japan game just now was such incredible garbage. Shameful.

Hope they get back to playing well in the knockout rounds

nutri_void
Apr 18, 2015

I shall devour your soul.
Grimey Drawer
I was watching the Senegal game and hoped that Senegal and Japan go through
At least one of them did

Eau de MacGowan
May 12, 2009

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Shameful stuff boys, time for seppuku.

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE
That was some good foot from Japan.

nutri_void
Apr 18, 2015

I shall devour your soul.
Grimey Drawer
Blegum is the third-worst way to get kicked out of a tournament after Ronald and Argentina

Sayonara, Glorious Rippon

dex_sda
Oct 11, 2012


Japan deserved to go farther. Blegum didn't

Bogan Krkic
Oct 31, 2010

Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.

rip japan

Raged
Jul 21, 2003

A revolution of beats
Want to know why Japan lost?

https://www.sbs.com.au/news/japan-s-world-cup-psychic-octopus-killed-for-food

Ka0
Sep 16, 2002

:siren: :siren: :siren:
AS A PROUD GAMERGATER THE ONLY THING I HATE MORE THAN WOMEN ARE GAYS AND TRANS PEOPLE
:siren: :siren: :siren:
Japan lost because their manager forgot that humans get tired after running for prolonged periods of time. Belgium's didn't, added Chadli and Fellaini, rest is history now.

nutri_void
Apr 18, 2015

I shall devour your soul.
Grimey Drawer
Apparently the Japan FA wants to replace Nishino with Klinsmann

Eau de MacGowan
May 12, 2009

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the old alliance

Lenin Riefenstahl
Sep 18, 2003

That's enough! Out of here, you tubs of beer!
Would explain Klinsman’s punditry on ITV for the game where he couldn’t have been nicer or more impressed with Japan

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008


Gravy Boat 2k

Alexeythegreat posted:

Apparently the Japan FA wants to replace Nishino with Klinsmann

Good god no

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon

Alexeythegreat posted:

Apparently the Japan FA wants to replace Nishino with Klinsmann

Rip nippon

Eau de MacGowan
May 12, 2009

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being serious given the poo poo sandwich he was served, nishino's done enough to get at least another two years out of it

peanut-
Feb 17, 2004
Fun Shoe
Klinsman got the United States Mens National Team to the World Cup knockout stages twice, maybe he is a good manager.

Edit: Actually only once, I thought he was in charge in 2010.

Eau de MacGowan
May 12, 2009

BRASIL HEXA
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Nishino's gone, rip nippons minamimon

frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

peanut- posted:

Klinsman got the United States Mens National Team to the World Cup knockout stages twice, maybe he is a good manager.

Edit: Actually only once, I thought he was in charge in 2010.
:hmmyes:

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon
Klinsmann of the caribbean

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008


Gravy Boat 2k

peanut- posted:

Klinsman got the United States Mens National Team to the World Cup knockout stages twice, maybe he is a good manager.

Edit: Actually only once, I thought he was in charge in 2010.

Someone needs to go back and read that article of just how bad US Men's Soccer was getting before Klinsmann got shitcanned.

edogawa rando
Mar 20, 2007

Eau de MacGowan posted:

being serious given the poo poo sandwich he was served, nishino's done enough to get at least another two years out of it

He had no intention of sticking around regardless of how Japan did.

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Ka0
Sep 16, 2002

:siren: :siren: :siren:
AS A PROUD GAMERGATER THE ONLY THING I HATE MORE THAN WOMEN ARE GAYS AND TRANS PEOPLE
:siren: :siren: :siren:

Alexeythegreat posted:

Apparently the Japan FA wants to replace Nishino with Klinsmann

Oh no. Noooo.

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