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Audio: https://clyp.it/xstobzlq Have you considered not marrying your fiancee? I can count on _one finger_ the number of guys that were USAF intel officers that I _wouldn't_ line up outside the gas chambers if the fourth reich became a thing. A few years from now, when you can't even stand to look at him without feeling a sense of extreme hatred and disappointment simultaneous to realizing that at 28 years old you spend 50% of your day thinking about becoming a divorcee, remember this advice: Run the gently caress away now. Seriously, there is a 100% chance your fiancee is a tool and a loving nitwit. There is a 100% chance that he will be peer pressured into becoming a distilled version of fighter pilot gay bro'ness _not by dudes that fly fighter jets_, but other sperged out intel retard officers. He's going to start saying things like "Check, Rodge, Vector, Burner" and other associated lame as gently caress things, while also sometimes randomly wearing a flightsuit to work on Fridays, despite his only flight time being the fam flight he poo poo his pants or puked his guts up during. Also he's going to cheat on you. Oh man is he going to cheat on you. And there is a not too bad chance that it won't be with some good looking gal, but rather some dumb bitch enlisted intel girl that _almost_ got a degree in psychology from her podunk state school before she decided she hated the taste of gargling frat sperm and dropped outand joined up to get a chance at being the hottest little twat in a windowless SCIF in Japan. But don't worry about that breaking your heart, he'll never tell you. You'll be too busy caring for the 3-4 kids he demands you squeeze out in repayment to the base model BMW 3 series he's going to buy you when he gets to his second assignment at Tinker Air Force Base. When he's _not_ deep dicking some borderline inbred dipshit Airman who's a civilian five and intel twelve, he'll be lording over you how his job and career come first, and pray he doesn't make more money than you because that'll come up everytime you sigh audibly at the dinner table where you two will passive aggressively try to grind down each others will to live and breathe. By this point as a captain he's going to be TDY 1-2 months a year, where he's getting half assed hand jobs from third tier strippers on excursions with the least socially inept enlisted guys in his flight-- this is probably the point where his raging alcoholism will be so clear and obvious to you that you two will start fighting every saturday before kick off when his college football team inevitably will take a beating. This fight won't stop until his next TDY when the sweet release of his toothless stripper infidelities and lack of home presence gives you time to bust out your big giant purple *BZZZZZ* friend whenever those walking talking pants making GBS threads machines you call children fall asleep long enough to let you deaden the nerves in your clitoris. Soon after he'll take his third assignment, the one right before he pins on Major, and suddenly he'll be pressuring you into becoming a fundamentalist christian, and he'll delete all of his whores off of his facebook account and spend his home time posting image macros about 2nd amendment rights, and how jesus spoke english in the bible so these loving mexicans should too. At this point you two will be consigned to bi-annual loving, and only when you've drank enough cheap boxed wine to be able to stand the idea of him pounding away on you missionary style but still refusing to look you in the eyes. This will also be the point when your oldest childs ADHD and pyromania are diagnosed, and one of your parents die. There is around a 85% chance one of you is going to be eating zoloft and klonopin out of loving pez dispensers, and waking up angry that the sweet release of death hasn't taken one of you out of this loveless hosed up marriage. Somewhere in here the idea of swinging is going to come up casually as an almost joke when you are both in the blissful release of a nice drunken buzz, and one of you will actually be very open and interested in the idea. The other is going to wind up being an unhappy accomplice wondering why your partner wants to gently caress almost chubby guys with spray on tans, or watch the sacred hole through which your children came into this world be filled with all manner of different ethnicities of cock. I'm late to bring this up, but sooner rather than later you're also going to screen positive for HPV, and your intel officer husband is going to take every bit of research skills he has from his job to convince you that you got it from donating blood or sitting on a toilet seat. Spoiler Alert: You didn't get it from the Red Cross or a trip to the shitter. As it stands now though, you can walk the gently caress away and enjoy a life that I'm pretty sure would be better than the above. You'll never have to see the inside of an officers wives meeting which is a lovecraftian hell that makes my description of your future seem like Charlie's trip through the chocolate factory.
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Jun 23, 2018 00:05
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| # ? May 5, 2024 04:10 |
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Did not read (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Jun 23, 2018 00:06
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Woof Blitzer posted:Did not read Mods?!
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Jun 23, 2018 00:08
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Original was better
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Jun 23, 2018 00:11
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5
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Jun 23, 2018 00:15
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Didn’t they end up divorced before his second assignment? She shoulda listened to me. I may have been high, but I wasn’t wrong.
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Jun 23, 2018 03:59
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LtCol J. Krusinski posted:Didn’t they end up divorced before his second assignment? She shoulda listened to me. I may have been high, but I wasn’t wrong. need confirmation on this poo poo
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Jun 23, 2018 21:12
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LtCol J. Krusinski posted:She shoulda listened to me. I may have been high, but I wasn’t wrong.
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Jul 2, 2018 02:08
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I heard Shim hotboxes with the Greek Oracle but she got too high and melted her face.
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Jul 2, 2018 20:17
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| # ? May 5, 2024 04:10 |
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NTI put out a reading list, so if you want to read some good books about nukes here you go. Not Your Average Beach Read: NTI’s Essential Reading List Some of the books and articles on the list quote:Deterrence Theory and Early Development and Use of WMDs
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Jul 3, 2018 14:02
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