safari guide who cannot remember any of the animal names

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Manifisto

[tour guide]: okay, those guys over there are aardvarks, and those little guys are, um, baboons. off in the distance are some coatimundis who are nervous about their mortal enemy, the dingo. all these mounds you see around here are built by . . . elephants, who have an extensive network of underground tunnels. oh that thing that just flew by? it's a, uh, ferret. a flying ferret, they're rare.

[little boy on tour]: what's that?

[tour guide, not looking up from newspaper]: gecko

[little boy]: and th-

[tour guide]: horse. iguana. jackalope. kite. something that starts with "L".

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Aug 8, 2019 04:58

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 20:15

Galaxander

Why we're in luck! There are some cuddle puppies in the river to your left. They're a bit hard to see because they're submerged in the water, but not to worry: I speak their language. GULG! LUH! GUH! EBLEGM!
*Hippos emerge from the water bellowing territorially*
Ha ha, I've missed you too, my friends.

# ? Aug 8, 2019 14:30

nut

*points at giant termite mound* and that, my friends, is a colony of living Floam and, yes, just like its domesticated counterpart it makes farty noises when u squish it

# ? Aug 8, 2019 15:54

LastGoodBoy: Keep your mind be open window everyday

*Driving past antelope* "Huh... this doesn't look right... I think we made a wrong turn somewhere."

High on the hog, 90's style.

# ? Aug 8, 2019 18:57

canyoneer: I only have canyoneyes for you

"what are those pointy deer?"

*running through mnemonic in head* deer. morning deer. breakfast. breakfast melon. cantaloupe. antelope.

other guest pipes up: "i think it's a springbok"

# ? Aug 8, 2019 19:23

super sweet best pal

bee eater posted:

*points at giant termite mound* and that, my friends, is a colony of living Floam and, yes, just like its domesticated counterpart it makes farty noises when u squish it

# ? Aug 8, 2019 19:44

lost my old email

the safari guide tries to recall their younger years. they were so full of life back then, frothing with vigour... but time has taken it's terrible toll. for a brief second there is flash of light in the dark and a smile plays across their face at the half-remembrance of some romance long since past. drat it all, what is the stilt-horse called again?

_{_{_{_{_{_{woooooo tiny shout out to deaf sex woooooooo it is spooky and i should have slept more posting up a storm this night wooooooooooooo i say. tiny shout out to mocking quantum also that guy rules. whoooooooooooo}}}}}}

# ? Aug 8, 2019 20:08

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

lost my old email posted:

the safari guide tries to recall their younger years. they were so full of life back then, frothing with vigour... but time has taken it's terrible toll. for a brief second there is flash of light in the dark and a smile plays across their face at the half-remembrance of some romance long since past. drat it all, what is the stilt-horse called again?

No sooner had an image in the safari's wildlife guide caught my eye than a shudder ran through me and I stopped, intent upon the extraordinary thing that was happening to me. An exquisite pleasure had invaded my senses, something isolated, detached, with no suggestion of its origin. And at once the vicissitudes of life had become indifferent to me, its disasters innocuous, its brevity illusory � this new sensation having had on me the effect which love has of filling me with a precious essence; or rather this essence was not in me it was me. ... Whence did it come? What did it mean? How could I seize and apprehend it? ... And suddenly the memory revealed itself. The image was that of the Zoobooks which on Sunday mornings at Combray (because I did not go out before mass), when I went to say good morning to him, the mailman would give me, shrinkwrapped and new-smelling. The sight of the Zoobooks had recalled nothing to my mind before i saw it. And all from trying to figure out what that little burrowing animal was.

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Aug 8, 2019 20:56

alnilam

magic cactus posted:

No sooner had an image in the safari's wildlife guide caught my eye than a shudder ran through me and I stopped, intent upon the extraordinary thing that was happening to me. An exquisite pleasure had invaded my senses, something isolated, detached, with no suggestion of its origin. And at once the vicissitudes of life had become indifferent to me, its disasters innocuous, its brevity illusory – this new sensation having had on me the effect which love has of filling me with a precious essence; or rather this essence was not in me it was me. ... Whence did it come? What did it mean? How could I seize and apprehend it? ... And suddenly the memory revealed itself. The image was that of the Zoobooks which on Sunday mornings at Combray (because I did not go out before mass), when I went to say good morning to him, the mailman would give me, shrinkwrapped and new-smelling. The sight of the Zoobooks had recalled nothing to my mind before i saw it. And all from trying to figure out what that little burrowing animal was.

lol is this Proust

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Aug 8, 2019 21:20

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

alnilam posted:

lol is this Proust

got it in one lol.

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Aug 8, 2019 21:24

Android Blues

Drink-Mix Man posted:

Opening my mouth to make random sounds to describe animals, and just so happening to exist in the universe or part of the universe where by sheer probability all my impromptu noises are the correct names.

canyoneer posted:

family of giraffes eating leaves off a tree

"amazing! it's Vachellia tortilis, aka umbrella thorn acacia! these trees are incredible. great canopy, deep roots, and excellent shade. the thorns won't deter those horses from eating the leaves though."
*misty eyed* "what a treat. it's a subspecies raddiana variety."

alnilam posted:

the entire eugene ionesco play Rhinoceros but nobody in the play can remember what the animal is called, also the play is titled "Ornery Grey Animal (Symbolic for Fascism??)"

ShinyBirdTeeth posted:

I don't understand why these pigs are being so rude to that horse. He is working very hard.

Galaxander posted:

*seeing a pack of hyenas, driver ducks down low* Take a look at the ground bullies if you want, just be warned that they can really hurt your feelings. I can't let them see me after last time.

lol