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mountaincat

The first part is about sand-
wiches. The second part is
about morality.
In an automatic car wash, they cut up a towel and drape it over the car, waving it back and forth. What other designs did they try before rolling out the current design?

* submerge entire car in water
* soapy apes
* "your car looks great" gaslighting

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Manifisto


write the words "wash me" in the dirt with a finger over and over again until the whole car is clean


ty nesamdoom!

nut

mountaincat posted:

* "your car looks great" gaslighting

Manifisto posted:

write the words "wash me" in the dirt with a finger over and over again until the whole car is clean

lmbo

nut

driving so fast all the time dirt cannot stick never stopping from the mancave to the mangrave baby yeah its a f*in hemi

Finger Prince


The entire car wash was abandoned after the vacuum incident(s).

mountaincat

The first part is about sand-
wiches. The second part is
about morality.
This was supposed to be abandoned cat wash ideas. A bit of a typo there. I mean with a car you just sort of spray it with jets of water. But cats are too quick and agile for that. They will jump right out of the way. That's why cat moms lick their kittens. You never see that coming. Somebody somes up and just licks you all over. It's a surprise every time.

bradzilla

a reverse carwash where they dump dirty water all over your car so you can tell your friends you've been offroading

Pot Smoke Phoenix



Smoke 'em if you gottem!
A bunch of wrinkled old men in speedos wash your car with their dirty boxer shorts.

nut

jackets but for cars

google THIS

Spritzing some Febreze in the general direction of the car and demanding a $20.

google THIS

Spit-shining, like literally scrubbing the whole car with a bucket full of spit. A bunch of workers have to sit around all day guzzling bottled water and popping dry mouth lozenges to produce our premium cleaning product.

Manifisto


"abandoned car wash" sounds like a haunted house

so either

- haunted house themed car wash, where going through the wash is like one of those haunted house rides and stuff pops out from the darkness to scare you, like skeletons and that sort of thing

or

- actual haunted house car wash, where your car is washed by ghosts


ty nesamdoom!

pixaal

All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.


A haunted car wash would clearly spray "blood" (Kool-aid), wash the car with "intestines" (spaghetti noodles) and have constant laughing playing on the speakers.



sig by owlhawk911

Manifisto


pixaal posted:

A haunted car wash would clearly spray "blood" (Kool-aid), wash the car with "intestines" (spaghetti noodles) and have constant laughing playing on the speakers.

:shutupandtakemymoney:


ty nesamdoom!

nut

pixaal posted:

A haunted car wash would clearly spray "blood" (Kool-aid), wash the car with "intestines" (spaghetti noodles) and have constant laughing playing on the speakers.

Mechanic: Well we found your problem, someone had stuffed a couple peeled grapes into the intake valve

Me: First of all, I told you to keep your eyes closed--they were supposed to be eyeballs!

super sweet best pal

On the outskirts of town, next to a series of old dirt roads, there sits an old abandoned car wash and 1950s diner. The buildings were erected in the postwar boom to cater to greasers who raced their hot rods through the desert. The place was very popular until about '58, when the owner of both businesses committed suicide after his son died in a race.

Park your car outside the wash and drop your car keys and a quarter in the tray at the pay booth. Turn around and you'll notice your car has disappeared. A voice from inside the booth will say something along the lines of "We'll have that ready for you in a jiff, why not grab a soda at the diner while you wait," but when you turn back around, no one is there and your keys and quarter are also missing. If you inspect the wash bays, you'll find your car sitting in one, looking like it had been abandoned for years. Don't bother trying to open it, it will be locked and even if you brought a spare key or break open a window and try to hotwire it, it won't start.

Do what the voice said and head on over to the diner. From the outside it will look like an ordinary abandoned fast food restaurant, but the second you walk through the door it will be brightly lit and full of people wearing 1950s fashions. Music will be playing on the jukebox, a generic hit from that era you'll have trouble remembering later. The booths are all full, so head on over to the bar and order whatever you like.

Order something and wait. You can try making small talk with the people next to you, but you'll find them to be poor conversationalists. Eventually the jukebox will go quiet as a man who looks like he's cosplaying Fonzie walks through the door. If you looked at a photo of the owner's son while researching the place, this man might seem familiar, but you won't recognize him. The other patrons at the bar will clear off and he'll order a beer. The soda jerk will apologize and say they don't serve alcohol. This will send him into a rage and you'll likely spill your drink on him. He'll get pissed and pull out a switchblade. At this point you'll start noticing that not all the patrons are wearing 50s clothing, some are wearing more recent fashions and all of those patrons have noticeable knife wounds. You can talk him down by challenging him to a race instead.

You'll be provided with a hot rod and instructed to pull up to a ramshackle starting gate in the desert. If you drive safely while keeping pace, you should be able to win. He'll drive into a rock while taunting you and crash (you'll recall later this matches up with the owner's son's obituary). At this point you'll black out and wake up in front of the car wash. Your car will be where you parked it last night and you'll wonder if it was all a dream, but the car will be cleaner than when you arrived, like it just came off the showroom floor.

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN


I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.


super sweet best pal posted:

On the outskirts of town, next to a series of old dirt roads, there sits an old abandoned car wash and 1950s diner. The buildings were erected in the postwar boom to cater to greasers who raced their hot rods through the desert. The place was very popular until about '58, when the owner of both businesses committed suicide after his son died in a race.

Park your car outside the wash and drop your car keys and a quarter in the tray at the pay booth. Turn around and you'll notice your car has disappeared. A voice from inside the booth will say something along the lines of "We'll have that ready for you in a jiff, why not grab a soda at the diner while you wait," but when you turn back around, no one is there and your keys and quarter are also missing. If you inspect the wash bays, you'll find your car sitting in one, looking like it had been abandoned for years. Don't bother trying to open it, it will be locked and even if you brought a spare key or break open a window and try to hotwire it, it won't start.

Do what the voice said and head on over to the diner. From the outside it will look like an ordinary abandoned fast food restaurant, but the second you walk through the door it will be brightly lit and full of people wearing 1950s fashions. Music will be playing on the jukebox, a generic hit from that era you'll have trouble remembering later. The booths are all full, so head on over to the bar and order whatever you like.

Order something and wait. You can try making small talk with the people next to you, but you'll find them to be poor conversationalists. Eventually the jukebox will go quiet as a man who looks like he's cosplaying Fonzie walks through the door. If you looked at a photo of the owner's son while researching the place, this man might seem familiar, but you won't recognize him. The other patrons at the bar will clear off and he'll order a beer. The soda jerk will apologize and say they don't serve alcohol. This will send him into a rage and you'll likely spill your drink on him. He'll get pissed and pull out a switchblade. At this point you'll start noticing that not all the patrons are wearing 50s clothing, some are wearing more recent fashions and all of those patrons have noticeable knife wounds. You can talk him down by challenging him to a race instead.

You'll be provided with a hot rod and instructed to pull up to a ramshackle starting gate in the desert. If you drive safely while keeping pace, you should be able to win. He'll drive into a rock while taunting you and crash (you'll recall later this matches up with the owner's son's obituary). At this point you'll black out and wake up in front of the car wash. Your car will be where you parked it last night and you'll wonder if it was all a dream, but the car will be cleaner than when you arrived, like it just came off the showroom floor.

Manifisto


super sweet best pal posted:

On the outskirts of town, next to a series of old dirt roads, there sits an old abandoned car wash and 1950s diner. The buildings were erected in the postwar boom to cater to greasers who raced their hot rods through the desert. The place was very popular until about '58, when the owner of both businesses committed suicide after his son died in a race.

Park your car outside the wash and drop your car keys and a quarter in the tray at the pay booth. Turn around and you'll notice your car has disappeared. A voice from inside the booth will say something along the lines of "We'll have that ready for you in a jiff, why not grab a soda at the diner while you wait," but when you turn back around, no one is there and your keys and quarter are also missing. If you inspect the wash bays, you'll find your car sitting in one, looking like it had been abandoned for years. Don't bother trying to open it, it will be locked and even if you brought a spare key or break open a window and try to hotwire it, it won't start.

Do what the voice said and head on over to the diner. From the outside it will look like an ordinary abandoned fast food restaurant, but the second you walk through the door it will be brightly lit and full of people wearing 1950s fashions. Music will be playing on the jukebox, a generic hit from that era you'll have trouble remembering later. The booths are all full, so head on over to the bar and order whatever you like.

Order something and wait. You can try making small talk with the people next to you, but you'll find them to be poor conversationalists. Eventually the jukebox will go quiet as a man who looks like he's cosplaying Fonzie walks through the door. If you looked at a photo of the owner's son while researching the place, this man might seem familiar, but you won't recognize him. The other patrons at the bar will clear off and he'll order a beer. The soda jerk will apologize and say they don't serve alcohol. This will send him into a rage and you'll likely spill your drink on him. He'll get pissed and pull out a switchblade. At this point you'll start noticing that not all the patrons are wearing 50s clothing, some are wearing more recent fashions and all of those patrons have noticeable knife wounds. You can talk him down by challenging him to a race instead.

You'll be provided with a hot rod and instructed to pull up to a ramshackle starting gate in the desert. If you drive safely while keeping pace, you should be able to win. He'll drive into a rock while taunting you and crash (you'll recall later this matches up with the owner's son's obituary). At this point you'll black out and wake up in front of the car wash. Your car will be where you parked it last night and you'll wonder if it was all a dream, but the car will be cleaner than when you arrived, like it just came off the showroom floor.


ty nesamdoom!

Escape From Noise

Covering your car in canned tuna so cats will lick it clean.

super sweet best pal

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Covering your car in canned tuna so cats will lick it clean.

They're already on it all the time, might as well get some use out of them.

Historical Wizards


Cover your car in tinfoil so when you're done using it you can just take the foil off and the car is still clean!

Simply submerge the car in cola and watch all the grime dissolve away.


Many thanks Social Vegan for the wonderful av, and Fanky Malloons for the sig

Horace Kinch

fill an above-ground pool with bubblebath and just plow through that bubbly bastard

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Korean Boomhauer

super sweet best pal posted:

On the outskirts of town, next to a series of old dirt roads, there sits an old abandoned car wash and 1950s diner. The buildings were erected in the postwar boom to cater to greasers who raced their hot rods through the desert. The place was very popular until about '58, when the owner of both businesses committed suicide after his son died in a race.

Park your car outside the wash and drop your car keys and a quarter in the tray at the pay booth. Turn around and you'll notice your car has disappeared. A voice from inside the booth will say something along the lines of "We'll have that ready for you in a jiff, why not grab a soda at the diner while you wait," but when you turn back around, no one is there and your keys and quarter are also missing. If you inspect the wash bays, you'll find your car sitting in one, looking like it had been abandoned for years. Don't bother trying to open it, it will be locked and even if you brought a spare key or break open a window and try to hotwire it, it won't start.

Do what the voice said and head on over to the diner. From the outside it will look like an ordinary abandoned fast food restaurant, but the second you walk through the door it will be brightly lit and full of people wearing 1950s fashions. Music will be playing on the jukebox, a generic hit from that era you'll have trouble remembering later. The booths are all full, so head on over to the bar and order whatever you like.

Order something and wait. You can try making small talk with the people next to you, but you'll find them to be poor conversationalists. Eventually the jukebox will go quiet as a man who looks like he's cosplaying Fonzie walks through the door. If you looked at a photo of the owner's son while researching the place, this man might seem familiar, but you won't recognize him. The other patrons at the bar will clear off and he'll order a beer. The soda jerk will apologize and say they don't serve alcohol. This will send him into a rage and you'll likely spill your drink on him. He'll get pissed and pull out a switchblade. At this point you'll start noticing that not all the patrons are wearing 50s clothing, some are wearing more recent fashions and all of those patrons have noticeable knife wounds. You can talk him down by challenging him to a race instead.

You'll be provided with a hot rod and instructed to pull up to a ramshackle starting gate in the desert. If you drive safely while keeping pace, you should be able to win. He'll drive into a rock while taunting you and crash (you'll recall later this matches up with the owner's son's obituary). At this point you'll black out and wake up in front of the car wash. Your car will be where you parked it last night and you'll wonder if it was all a dream, but the car will be cleaner than when you arrived, like it just came off the showroom floor.

thanks for the walkthrough, ive been stuck at the diner all drat night.

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