The robot wipes the ass

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > The robot wipes the ass

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treasure bear

cda posted:

A robot must wipe its own rear end as long as doing so does not conflict with the first or second law.

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:03

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# ? Apr 29, 2024 18:25

old friend

cda posted:

A robot may not make a human's rear end dirty or, by inaction, allow a human rear end to become dirty.

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:04

google THIS

Ah yes, Assimov's laws of robotics

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:08

alexandriao

cda posted:

A robot may not make a human's rear end dirty or, by inaction, allow a human rear end to become dirty.

cda posted:

A robot must wipe the rear end of a human except where it would conflict with the first law.

cda posted:

A robot must wipe its own rear end as long as doing so does not conflict with the first or second law.

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:11

nut

making all my technics creations pass the turding test

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:11

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

google THIS posted:

Ah yes, Assimov's laws of robotics

spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:17

Prof. Crocodile

google THIS posted:

Ah yes, Assimov's laws of robotics

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:37

Goons Are Gifts

google THIS posted:

Ah yes, Assimov's laws of robotics

lmfao

# ? Jul 16, 2020 20:42

google THIS

# ? Jul 16, 2020 21:22

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

google THIS posted:

lmfao. it's just like the such great heights music video

spring sigs by nesamdoom and Ravenous Scoot

# ? Jul 16, 2020 21:25

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

google THIS posted:

# ? Jul 16, 2020 22:52

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

google THIS posted:

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
_{_{Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps}}
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

# ? Jul 16, 2020 23:00

Goons Are Gifts

google THIS posted:

# ? Jul 16, 2020 23:04

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

google THIS posted:

# ? Jul 16, 2020 23:17

Drink-Mix Man: You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

google THIS posted:

Ah yes, Assimov's laws of robotics

# ? Jul 16, 2020 23:23

Prof. Crocodile

google THIS posted:

Its technique needs a little work tbqh

# ? Jul 17, 2020 00:35

cda: by Hand Knit

the robot feels no shame wiping the rear end

# ? Jul 17, 2020 00:51

cda: by Hand Knit

the robot was sent back in time to wipe the rear end of a young man named John Connor

# ? Jul 17, 2020 00:52

old friend

can't believe this robot put me out of work

# ? Jul 17, 2020 01:28

Escape From Noise

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

Escape From Noise fucked around with this message at 10:37 on Jul 17, 2020

# ? Jul 17, 2020 03:48

old friend

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along in the sand, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what desert, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

# ? Jul 17, 2020 09:06

Goons Are Gifts

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

# ? Jul 17, 2020 14:04

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

# ? Jul 17, 2020 14:12

google THIS

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

# ? Jul 17, 2020 14:44

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

# ? Jul 17, 2020 14:55

Drink-Mix Man: You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

All those memories will be lost in time. Like turds in the drain.

# ? Jul 17, 2020 17:56

cda: by Hand Knit

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

lol

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Jul 17, 2020 18:01

Heather Papps: hello friend

metropolis was already one of the greatest films of all time, but now that we've found the final lost scenes of maria wiping asses who can argue that it's not the greatest accomplishment of this whole drat planet?!?

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Jul 17, 2020 21:57

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 29, 2024 18:25

Slumpy

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Holden : You're in a public toilet, walking along on the tiles, when all of a sudden you look down...
Leon : What one?
Holden : What?
Leon : What public toilet?
Holden : It doesn't make any difference what public toilet, it's completely hypothetical.
Leon : But, how come I'd be there?
Holden : Maybe you need to take a leak. Maybe you want to be by yourself. Who knows? You look down and see a poopy butt, Leon. It's crawling toward you...
Leon : Poopy butt? What's that?
Holden : You know what a butt is?
Leon : Of course!
Holden : Same thing.
Leon : I've never seen a poopy butt... But I understand what you mean.
Holden : You reach down and you slap the poopy butt on its cheek, Leon.
Leon : Do you make up these questions, Mr. Holden? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Holden : The poopy butt just lays there, becoming crusty under the heat of the lights of the public toilet, beating its limbs trying to wipe itself, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Leon : What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Holden : I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Leon?
Holden : They're just questions, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an emotional response... Shall we continue?

slumpy

# ? Jul 18, 2020 03:35

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > The robot wipes the ass

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