Are Hummingbirds Dangerous?

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Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

will they sting me if i go too near?

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:20

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# ? May 5, 2024 11:21

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

They will slurp out your eyeballs and commandeer your flesh prison for their own demented ends, so they're clearly perfectly safe to touch!

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:33

Twenty Four

hummingbirds are dicks and they hate each other and also me and the feeling is mutual

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:38

Twenty Four

to be clear i dont want to hate them but they are really mean!

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:40

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

hummingbirds are cool for getting the nectar out that i can't

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:45

xcheopis

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

They will slurp out your eyeballs and commandeer your flesh prison for their own demented ends, so they're clearly perfectly safe to touch!

Ah, you got your second Moderna shot.

Fifteen years taking prescriptions
Now a shrink like, "I dunno, maybe get a kitten"

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:46

Twenty Four

pretty sure their constant 1 inch fly by high speed approaches while I sit outside will one day end in a collision or getting tangled in my hair or worse

stop buzzing the tower humming birds!

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:47

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

do they build cobwebs?

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:50

xcheopis

Plant MONSTER. posted:

do they build cobwebs?

Big ones that they can use as trampolines.

Fifteen years taking prescriptions
Now a shrink like, "I dunno, maybe get a kitten"

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:53

Twenty Four

Three humming bird feeders, two humming birds, both constantly attack each other over any one that the other uses because they are assholes.

For what it is worth I got attacked by a humming bird today AGAIN!

# ? Mar 20, 2021 23:53

xcheopis

Twenty Four posted:

Three humming bird feeders, two humming birds, both constantly attack each other over any one that the other uses because they are assholes.

For what it is worth I got attacked by a humming bird today AGAIN!

Have you considered that MAYBE if you weren't SUCH A SWEET PERSON, this wouldn't be happening? Really, it's your own fault.

Fifteen years taking prescriptions
Now a shrink like, "I dunno, maybe get a kitten"

# ? Mar 21, 2021 00:00

FutonForensic

it's called the ruby throated hummingbird on account of its calling card left on victims: crimson red gullets slashed by tiny blades

# ? Mar 21, 2021 00:12

FutonForensic

a touching story in vigilante justice: local hero paints butthole red and gives those hoodlum birds a prank to remember

# ? Mar 21, 2021 00:14

nut

depends on how you feel about humming

# ? Mar 21, 2021 00:15

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

xcheopis posted:

Ah, you got your second Moderna shot.

No, the first Pfizer- say, have you heard of Microsoft Windows?

Bill Gates is telling me to tell you to stand closer to the 5g tower so you can *static* me bet *static* while I offer these fantastic dea *static* on the prices for Micros *static* products!

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
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# ? Mar 21, 2021 02:12

Heather Papps: hello friend

hummers are scary but not terribly dangerous. one tried to attack me last year but bailed upon realizing i was not a flower, and i had to remove two from my patio before they died.

basically they are the softest bird in history and you should fear not.

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Mar 21, 2021 02:40

Barco Fiesta: a fantasy of olives

they are not dangerous but they are really rwally judgy

# ? Mar 21, 2021 03:00

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

They wiped out all the dinosaurs.

That's how badass they are- they figured out a way to make a meteor hit the Earth and wipe out their competition.

Dinosaurs were fierce nectar hunters and the hummingbird's number one competitor.

Prove me wrong, it's all right there *points around wildly*

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
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# ? Mar 21, 2021 03:09

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

normal humming birds are quite harmless OP.

it's the meth hummingbirds you need to worry about

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Mar 21, 2021 05:18

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

magic cactus posted:

normal humming birds are quite harmless OP.

it's the meth hummingbirds you need to worry about

When they get into the PCP they can get pretty violent.

The best strategy is to be patient and play the long game, since their rapid heart rate and metabolism dooms them to an early death.

# ? Mar 21, 2021 05:28

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

magic cactus posted:

normal humming birds are quite harmless OP.

it's the meth hummingbirds you need to worry about

Flap so fast their tiny little wings warp space so they can dart inside your ribcage in their teensy little warp bubble and set up shop, slurping up all your innards at their leisure.

Good luck living like that...

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
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# ? Mar 21, 2021 05:28

mailorder bees: FLUFFERNUTTER

how can they be dangerous if theyre not even real :confused:

thanks Manifisto!

# ? Mar 21, 2021 06:41

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

minecraft_holmes posted:

how can they be dangerous if theyre not even real

# ? Mar 21, 2021 06:46

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

I eat them all the time op, they are perfectly fine

# ? Mar 21, 2021 10:45

Finger Prince

RickRogers posted:

I eat them all the time op, they are perfectly fine

Paint your face red and your lips yellow like a hummingbird feedwe and lie silent and still with an open mouth full of sugar water.
Then when they approach for a sip.... CHOMP!

# ? Mar 21, 2021 14:10

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

Finger Prince posted:

Paint your face red and your lips yellow like a hummingbird feedwe and lie silent and still with an open mouth full of sugar water.
Then when they approach for a sip.... CHOMP!

omg that's badass from a lore standpoint gonna make a plant monster based on that idea. thank you finger prince. : )

# ? Mar 21, 2021 14:19

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Hummingbirds are jerks but I can't stay mad at them

# ? Mar 21, 2021 16:11

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Are there other humming animals? Now I'm imagining a hummingdog flitting back and forth on a blur of legs

# ? Mar 21, 2021 16:13

xcheopis

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

Are there other humming animals? Now I'm imagining a hummingdog flitting back and forth on a blur of legs

Cats hum all the time

# ? Mar 21, 2021 16:21

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

Hummingsloth slowly vibrating up and down trees

# ? Mar 21, 2021 17:10

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

The deep, menacing buzz of an approaching hummingbear

# ? Mar 21, 2021 17:25

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

Hummingdad flitting around the grill, lured by scent of charcoal.

# ? Mar 21, 2021 17:40

Drink-Mix Man: You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Hummingbirds are destroyung tyis country

# ? Mar 21, 2021 19:56

Lil Swamp Booger Baby

They can fire a semi-automatic weapon faster than any other living creature on this earth. Trillions of dead earthworms and small children have fallen by their hand.

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# ? Mar 23, 2021 13:42

biosterous

i think you've got them mixed up with harmingbirds

^{^{thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!}}
^{^{gallery of sigs}}

he/him

# ? Mar 23, 2021 18:15

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

OP I'm changing my opinion. They have somehow become organised and have me trapped in a cupboard. This is the price I have paid for delicious crispy-fried hummingbird.

The humming is unending, I am so so sorry

# ? Mar 23, 2021 18:19

Plant MONSTER.: I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop

So I went outside and long story short I am now part of a hummingbird gang and I have to like, drain one of youse guyses of your fluids as my initiation. I vote nut

# ? Mar 23, 2021 19:51

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Herlp there's a humpingbird on my leg!

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
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# ? Mar 23, 2021 19:53

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# ? May 5, 2024 11:21

Ventral EggSac

biosterous posted:

i think you've got them mixed up with harmingbirds

# ? Mar 24, 2021 21:06

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Are Hummingbirds Dangerous?