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mysterious frankie
Jan 11, 2009

This displeases Dev- ..van. Shut up.
Before covid I knew half my family came from around Glasgow and the other half came from around Germany, and that some of them were Jewish. Thanks to a little research and a 23 & me test I found out half my family came from around Glasgow (but were of English descent), the German half came from Cologne specifically, and the Jewish part didn't exist, but I am 20% Swedish... not sure how my mom confused Jews with Scandinavians, but whatever.

Basically I confirmed- scientifically confirmed- that I am 100% a big dollop of hastily flung mayo oozing down the supper club wall of history.

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tango alpha delta
Sep 9, 2011

Ask me about my wealthy lifestyle and passive income! I love bragging about my wealth to my lessers! My opinions are more valid because I have more money than you! Stealing the fruits of the labor of the working class is okay, so long as you don't do it using crypto. More money = better than!

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

how did this post get lost for a year and a half?

lol, i'm 52, so it probably got lost in the mail before i figured out how to computer.

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

tango alpha delta posted:

lol, i'm 52, so it probably got lost in the mail before i figured out how to computer.

ok dad

Guildenstern Mother
Mar 31, 2010

Why walk when you can ride?
My grandpa actually was straight up given his farm by the government. All he had to do was build a house on it and the land was his. Also one of my ancestors on that side of the family was George Washington's chef.

tango alpha delta
Sep 9, 2011

Ask me about my wealthy lifestyle and passive income! I love bragging about my wealth to my lessers! My opinions are more valid because I have more money than you! Stealing the fruits of the labor of the working class is okay, so long as you don't do it using crypto. More money = better than!

Guildenstern Mother posted:

My grandpa actually was straight up given his farm by the government. All he had to do was build a house on it and the land was his. Also one of my ancestors on that side of the family was George Washington's chef.

a lot of my wife's ancestors emigrated from Germany in the 1700's and settled in the United States, before 1776, which means they probably helped kick the filthy British out.

tango alpha delta fucked around with this message at 06:50 on Sep 25, 2021

Earwicker
Jan 6, 2003

Guildenstern Mother posted:

My grandpa actually was straight up given his farm by the government.

i have an uncle in texas who has a ranch on which he has been "paid to not grow anything" by the government for like 40 years. i dont know what that means or how it works. he's also a baptist minister, water commissioner, and insane far right rear end in a top hat.

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Earwicker posted:

i have an uncle in texas who has a ranch on which he has been "paid to not grow anything" by the government for like 40 years. i dont know what that means or how it works. he's also a baptist minister, water commissioner, and insane far right rear end in a top hat.

all of those things somehow make perfect sense

Ventral EggSac
Dec 3, 2019

zedprime posted:

Statistically speaking 75% of us are likely descended from the queen that got railed by a ghost by now.

The Queen was Elizabeth II and the ghost was Slimer

Flyball
Apr 17, 2003

Earwicker posted:

i have an uncle in texas who has a ranch on which he has been "paid to not grow anything" by the government for like 40 years. i dont know what that means or how it works. he's also a baptist minister, water commissioner, and insane far right rear end in a top hat.

It's a form of price support. Welfare for farmers.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

tango alpha delta posted:

a lot of my wife's ancestors emigrated from Germany in the 1700's and settled in the United States, before 1776, which means they probably helped kick the filthy British out.

your wife's grandpa's grandpa's grandpa was a filthy hessian, tad

tango alpha delta
Sep 9, 2011

Ask me about my wealthy lifestyle and passive income! I love bragging about my wealth to my lessers! My opinions are more valid because I have more money than you! Stealing the fruits of the labor of the working class is okay, so long as you don't do it using crypto. More money = better than!

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD posted:

your wife's grandpa's grandpa's grandpa was a filthy hessian, tad

lol, at the risk of doxxing my ancestors, i'm pretty sure they were settlers instead of mercenaries:

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You Are A Werewolf
Apr 26, 2010

Black Gold!

My family name and ancestors have lived in southern Arizona and northern Mexico since the 1600s when it was part of the Viceroyalty of New Spain and the area was known as Pimería Alta. The name apparently originated in the Basque region of Spain, and my grandfather traced the lineage back to that region from a single man (whose name I forget) who made the trip from Spain to Veracruz in the early 1600s and settled in this area. A lot of my ancestors are even listed in an old giant tome of significant dates stored at the Tumacácori Mission, which I’ve had the privilege to look through and write the names down.

My other ancestors are the Chiricahua Apache, and since they lived in the same area as my namesake ancestors, families were bound to happen, and that makes Cochise my great great great grandfather.

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