 Here by popular demand, the Covid Jesus thread! As many of you are aware, a once in a lifetime pandemic is sweeping the nation, upending life, disrupting government, and inspiring death cults across the globe! Sound familiar? 2,000 years ago a Jewish Carpenter, of mysterious orgin blew the doors off the Roman Empire, started the largest cult in history, and immortalized the lower case t. And in the wildest claim, just after coming back to life, predicted a 3rd coming!  And just like predicted, no one saw it coming, almost no one knows it's happening right now! Jesus the Christ has returned, this time not as a man, but as a virus!  This thread is to talk about all the dumbies that can't see the return of Jesus and the righteous anti-vaxxers who are accepting Jesus as their lord and master.
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Jan 17, 2022 21:14
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| # ? May 4, 2024 02:49 |
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you are wrong op jesus would use his two swords to annihilate covid viroids with extreme prejudice
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Jan 17, 2022 21:15
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He is risen! Risen from a bat that hosed a pangolin.
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Jan 17, 2022 21:19
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Doctor Dogballs posted:you are wrong op jesus would use his two swords to annihilate covid viroids with extreme prejudice You mean with his Juses puches. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EnitdrbL0w
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Jan 17, 2022 21:21
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Jesus is rapturing up the faithful by killing them with covid, it's why so many rightwingers have these subconscious impulses telling them to not to get the vaccine or wear a mask or change their life in any way that could help prevent them from getting infected.
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Jan 17, 2022 21:24
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Doctor Dogballs posted:you are wrong op jesus would use his two swords to annihilate covid viroids with extreme prejudice Matthew 24:26-27 "So if anyone tells you, ‘There he is, out in the wilderness,’ do not go out; or, ‘Here he is, in the inner rooms,’ do not believe it. For as lightning that comes from the east is visible even in the west, so will be the coming of the Son of Man."
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Jan 17, 2022 21:29
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Doctor Dogballs posted:you are wrong op jesus would use his two swords to annihilate covid viroids with extreme prejudice zoro has 3 swords he would pwn jesus
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Jan 17, 2022 21:30
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Yaldabaoth posted:Jesus is rapturing up the faithful by killing them with covid, it's why so many rightwingers have these subconscious impulses telling them to not to get the vaccine or wear a mask or change their life in any way that could help prevent them from getting infected. Dang right! Jeremiah Was absolutely a bullfrog 22:10 "Do not weep for the dead or mourn for him, But weep continually for the one who goes away; For he will never return Or see his native land."
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Jan 17, 2022 21:32
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1st_Panzer_Div. posted:Dang right! I think one bible quote that's really relevant for the modern era is Ezekiel 35:  Because given the state of the world, it really feels like this is what God is doing.
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Jan 17, 2022 21:46
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the rapture already happened, i heard it last week
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Jan 17, 2022 21:47
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Yaldabaoth posted:I think one bible quote that's really relevant for the modern era is Ezekiel 35: amen brother. may covid jesus bless you next.
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Jan 17, 2022 22:19
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| # ? May 4, 2024 02:49 |
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Thread will return in 3 days.
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Jan 17, 2022 23:02
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