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How do I know when they're done *sticks a fork in one and gets shot in the eye with grapefruit juice*
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Jan 31, 2022 04:54
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ok guys, turns out grapefruits are a harder sell than we thought. Talked to the boys over in Marketing, word is we're going to be rebranding soon. Now I didn't say anything but if you see someone looks like they're from the bank asking around about what we do here these here trees are pink lemons
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Jan 31, 2022 05:12
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Hey so this poo poo fruit cancels out my anti-anxiety mess. Gonna have to burn it to the ground. Sorry gamma
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Jan 31, 2022 06:33
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Wasn't this a Doonesbury plot in the 90s or so? Zonker and Uncle Duke inherited a farm.
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Jan 31, 2022 09:56
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they say the happiest days of your life are the days you inherit a grapefruit farm and the day you sell your grapefruit farm
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Jan 31, 2022 14:31
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*tries to sell the land to Disney*
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Jan 31, 2022 16:18
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*joins National Grapefruit Advisory Council* *looks hard into bathroom mirror*
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Jan 31, 2022 16:25
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Movin' to the country Gonna eat a lot of grapefruits Movin' to the country Gonna eat me a lot of grapefruits…
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Jan 31, 2022 16:28
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bad news, hon. this year's grapefruit harvest is entirely edible, every last fruit. some of them are even delicious. no one's going to buy mutant grapefruits that are tolerable to eat, we're going to have to sell the farm.
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Jan 31, 2022 16:41
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no pubes yet sorry posted:they say the happiest days of your life are the days you inherit a grapefruit farm and the day you sell your grapefruit farm
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Jan 31, 2022 17:15
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Jan 31, 2022 17:16
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HOLY poo poo THANK YOU GRANDMA! I CANT BELIEVE ITS FINALLY HAPPENED, THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE! Opens up tab to proudly sign up for farmersonly dot com
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Jan 31, 2022 17:34
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I thought you said this was a grape fruit farm? What the gently caress are these big rear end things where are all the grapes?
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Jan 31, 2022 17:41
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Finally an endless supply of breakfast for a healthy balanced diet Every morning the first spoonful squirts right in my eye drat!
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Jan 31, 2022 17:45
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I sure hope no whores come and steal the grapefruits off of my trees. I SAID I SURE HOPE NO WHORES COME AND STEAL THE GRAPEFRUITS OFF OF MY TREES
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Jan 31, 2022 17:57
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Grapefruits come from a farm They were put there by a...schoolma'arm?
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Jan 31, 2022 20:43
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There’s nothing better than the smell when you run over a ruby red grapefruit with a lawnmower. In your citrus grove, not orchard or farm (Florida Facts!).
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Feb 1, 2022 00:45
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mobby_6kl posted:Watch out for the citrus-stealing whores, OP! They only go after lemons.
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Feb 1, 2022 00:50
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I think I found LAP: https://felthappiness.com/products/dramatic-felted-grapefruit-hat
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Feb 1, 2022 01:07
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donkey salami posted:I think I found LAP: Not to drop character or anything but, Jesus Christ, I want that hat.
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Feb 1, 2022 01:09
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Literally A Person posted:Not to drop character or anything but, Jesus Christ, I want that hat. I saw it and did think of you. I had same reaction. That is a good hat! But $150? Whew.
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Feb 1, 2022 01:15
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born to post. Forced to run my deceased aunts grapefruit farm
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Feb 1, 2022 01:19
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super sweet best pal posted:They only go after lemons. Are you sure? I wouldn't bet the farm on it.
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Feb 1, 2022 01:21
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starting a moderately successful tiktok about “farmer life” shortly before my farm fails catastrophically
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Feb 1, 2022 01:25
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Grandma Died or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Grapefruit Farm
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Feb 1, 2022 01:29
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"Thanks, I hate it"
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Feb 1, 2022 07:13
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Been trying to make it into a grapefruit vineyard, but those rich fucks just don't want anything to do with grapefruit wine. Probably shouldn't of specifically of called them dumb rich gently caress in my vineyard tour ad, but if I have to sink to advertising I'm at least going to be honest about it. I have morals drat it.
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Feb 1, 2022 11:33
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“Alexa. Play ‘Grapefruit Diet’ by Weird Al. Set to repeat.” Turns pistol over in hand. “Not today..”
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Feb 1, 2022 20:48
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*goes to local watering hole frequented by neighboring farmers* *drinks alone as everyone talks about how much they love their grapefruit farms and just how loving happy and fulfilled they are growing loving grapefruits and how their lives are so god damned wonderful because grapefruit, Grapefruit. Grapefruit. Grapefruit.* *sighs*
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Feb 2, 2022 02:57
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Ah geez LAP what's got you looking so down in the mouth? Hey you know what always cheers me up when I'm feeling blue?
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Feb 2, 2022 03:01
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Ah geez LAP what's got you looking so down in the mouth? Hey you know what always cheers me up when I'm feeling blue? If you say loving grapefruits that is loving it.
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Feb 2, 2022 03:07
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Woah! Hey! Who pissed in your grapefruit juice this morning?
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Feb 2, 2022 03:10
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Feb 2, 2022 03:42
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| # ? May 26, 2024 14:16 |
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Feb 2, 2022 03:54
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