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There's a new videogame based on Stanislaw Lem's classic sci fi novel The Invincible coming out soon, so I hurried and bought a copy of the book so I could read it and know all the tips, tricks, and secret areas of the game. Not only does the book not contain any insider info on the location of Easter eggs to be found in the upcoming game, it also doesn't contain a proper sci-fi twist. As you know, no sci-fi story is complete without a twist ending. Something like "the protagonist was the real monster all along" or "it turns out the mysterious person was the Devil" or "it all takes place on post-apocalyptic Earth." The Invincible is about the titular spaceship, the Invincible, coming to a Mars-like planet to find out what happened to their sister ship, the Condor, which vanished without a trace several years prior. The spaceship is outfitted with all the latest gadgets including forcefields that are basically impenetrable to everything but other forcefields, antimatter guns, an army of robot slaves, and a hovering supertank called "the Cyclops" which is basically a mobile fortress with its own forcefield and antimatter guns. Blah blah blah it all goes wrong and half the crew is neutralized. The spacemen actually behave really sensibly for the whole adventure (minus a momentary lapse when they contemplate turning off the forcefield just to see what happens if the mystery rain falls on them) and when things start looking really bad they all decide to leave. There's just one catch: there's four men unaccounted for. The motto of these spacemen is "no man left behind even if he's had his brain erased and is wandering in a stupor" so they can't leave until they account for the last four men. The heroic first officer goes out alone to try and find them. He wanders in the desert for a while, is menaced by the smoke monster from Lost but survives, he finds the dead bodies of three of the four men but runs out of air and barely makes it back alive. He passes out as he's rescued. The end. See, no twist. He goes out, has a rough time and makes it back. If *I* were writing the story, he'd come back from the desert but all the crew would have been devolved into apes while he was away. He'd sink to his knees and yell "Nooooooooo!" at the sky. Or maybe the ship left him behind, or was destroyed somehow, or he's infected by the planet's inhabitants and is actually bringing death back to the ship. Basically anything! I was looking forward to the twist through the whole book but there was nothing! Worst ending since Stephen King's Under the Dome. 8/10 for all the rest of the book. N/A for the ending. 0/10 for helping me find all the secret areas and collectables in the upcoming video game.
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Feb 4, 2022 05:06
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 11:13 |
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I hate it when sci-fi ends without a solid punchline. Brave New World really left me hanging.
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Feb 4, 2022 05:11
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They were really Adam and Eve!
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Feb 4, 2022 05:15
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I would have had the last spaceman rip off his helmet and say “I am no man left behind!” And it turns out they’re a space woman!
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Feb 4, 2022 05:22
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I am ensign Nomann, they always leave me behind 
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Feb 4, 2022 05:23
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Noblesse Obliged posted:I would have had the last spaceman rip off his helmet and say “I am no man left behind!” And it turns out they’re a space woman! Nice!
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Feb 4, 2022 05:26
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Colonel Cancer posted:I am ensign Nomann, they always leave me behind At least you're not Ensign Will.
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Feb 4, 2022 05:27
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The plot twist of the video game is going to be at the end they show a card that says THIS WAS THE REAL VILLAIN... and then it turns your monitor off.
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Feb 4, 2022 05:28
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But can you gently caress anyone in the crew? It's really important to be that all the crew constantly tell me how cool I am and that I can gently caress them if I want.
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Feb 4, 2022 20:56
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wow that game sounds really cool. just one question: why would I play that dumbass poo poo when I could be playing Five Nights at Freddy's: Security Breach?
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Feb 4, 2022 20:59
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Love a mobile website that forces you to use landscape 
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Feb 4, 2022 21:17
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The person who rescues main character is relieved they are still alive, they reach into the doctors bag for medical tools to check on Main Character and angrily pulls out their space doctors gadget and its been placed in a plate of jello. Main character smugly looks at the "camera". The Office Theme starts playing
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Feb 4, 2022 21:23
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Applewhite posted:...he finds the dead bodies of three of the four men but runs out of air and barely makes it back alive. What happened to the 4th guy? That sounds like it was going to be related to the twist but Lem's editor grew impatient and made him wrap up the story before he could properly finish it.
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Feb 4, 2022 21:34
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Yaldabaoth posted:What happened to the 4th guy? That sounds like it was going to be related to the twist but Lem's editor grew impatient and made him wrap up the story before he could properly finish it. Right? 4th guy could have been key to the whole thing.
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Feb 4, 2022 21:43
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I bet the 4th guy shows up in the game as the final boss
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Feb 4, 2022 21:45
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I know it's bad form to call attention to your own lovely joke but drat was I ever hoping to reap on that one Applewhite
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Feb 4, 2022 21:45
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https://youtu.be/Dj0V8uGI3DQ
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Feb 4, 2022 21:46
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signalnoise posted:I know it's bad form to call attention to your own lovely joke but drat was I ever hoping to reap on that one Applewhite Oh right does he hang himself or whatever?
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Feb 4, 2022 21:47
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BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:I bet the 4th guy shows up in the game as the final boss He starts out normal and then starts sprouting tentacles and grows to a giant ooze monster.
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Feb 4, 2022 21:48
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Applewhite posted:Oh right does he hang himself or whatever? Yeah at the end he leaves ~civilization~ joins the ~savages~ and becomes part of the whole safari thing and people wouldn't leave him alone because he was such a curiosity to have left. Suffice to say, one day they found him at the end of his rope
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Feb 4, 2022 21:50
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Yeah I remember now. It's been a while.
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Feb 4, 2022 21:52
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It's fair, I don't read much books myself on account of my eyes and brain being broken, and that's my personal favorite sci-fi book so it sticks out One of these days maybe there will be some kind of cyber eyes or something and I can read all the books, and then my cyber eyes can break just as I have the opportunity to read all the books
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Feb 4, 2022 21:55
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it should have turned out that the four dead men were also him
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Feb 4, 2022 22:22
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 11:13 |
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Punchline was untranslatable, sorry
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Feb 4, 2022 22:25
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