ITT you wake up on a tavern floor, wizarding hat over eyes.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > ITT you wake up on a tavern floor, wizarding hat over eyes.

A Bad King: Suppose the oil man,
He comes to town.
And you don't lay money down.

Yet Mr. King,
He killed the thread
The other day.
Well I wonder.
Who's gonna go to Hell?

You're a wizard. A bookish, wormish wizard with a wizard's gait, a wizard's world view, a wizard's spell book. The adventuring party you entered with left you on the floor of this damp, dank tavern. There are other wizards laying on the floor near you. A goblin steps over you and mumble-mentions a fireball, but are they referring to the spell or the drink? (you could use a drink)

# ? May 12, 2022 14:54

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# ? May 3, 2024 07:07

google THIS

I adjust my wizard hat but leave my robe on the floor

# ? May 12, 2022 16:03

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

I check to make sure my spurs are still on.

# ? May 12, 2022 16:10

Khanstant

I give up my dark wizard ways and become a calm lizard basking on a rock in the sun

# ? May 12, 2022 17:00

Manifisto

consider forming an alliance with the other wizards so we can collectively demand to be taken seriously by our adventuring parties

ty nesamdoom!

# ? May 12, 2022 18:24

Ass-penny

Khanstant posted:

I give up my dark wizard ways and become a calm lizard basking on a rock in the sun

# ? May 12, 2022 19:41

A Bad King: Suppose the oil man,
He comes to town.
And you don't lay money down.

Yet Mr. King,
He killed the thread
The other day.
Well I wonder.
Who's gonna go to Hell?

google THIS posted:

I adjust my wizard hat but leave my robe on the floor

Roll a dexterity ability check to see if you maintain your hat. The robe is left on the floor. You perceive through the corner of your eye a small cat pouncing the robe. I rolled a saving throw for the small cat to see if the cat trips over your trip hazard, the cat deftly defies the robe's efforts to ruin her day and buries itself in play with your laundry.

Buttchocks posted:

I check to make sure my spurs are still on.

Roll for perception.

Khanstant posted:

I give up my dark wizard ways and become a calm lizard basking on a rock in the sun

Roll a wisdom saving throw

# ? May 12, 2022 19:56

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

A Bad King posted:

Buttchocks posted:
I check to make sure my spurs are still on.

Roll for perception.

I roll my heel on the floor, listening for a jingle. Then I do a little dance while still on the floor.

# ? May 12, 2022 22:54

biosterous

i take note of my bod for hangover symptoms

hmm.

^{^{thank you saoshyant for this sig!!!}}
^{^{gallery of sigs}}

he/him

# ? May 12, 2022 23:10

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

"I WANNA CAST A SPELL!" I attempt to shout, but the dryness of my mouth absorbs my words like Boromir's body did all those orc arrows.

Instead I clutch my throbbing head, and attempt to roll out of the puddle of vomit I can only hope is my own...

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
_{_{Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps}}
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

# ? May 13, 2022 19:47

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can we remember how magic we got last night?

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# ? May 13, 2022 23:36

Twenty Four

A Bad King posted:

(you could use a drink)

I mean that pretty much a given almost all the time.

# ? May 14, 2022 08:05

Finger Prince

Wizards are basically magic lawyers. Written spells are legal writs, like summoning an elemental is basically just contract law and if you want that elemental to stay in control, your grasp of nested notwithstanding clauses had better be iron clad. Casting fireball is just providing the magical ether (or whatever the source of magic in the world is) with a legal argument for why an explosion of fire should be, and indeed is, required to appear at the location detailed in subsection B. (3a).
Sorcerors are just con men who eschew magical law to just kind of "ehhh buddy, come on, you know you want to..." to convince the magic to do the thing.

# ? May 14, 2022 17:33

Ass-penny

is pulling the hat down over my eyes and going back to sleep an option?

# ? May 14, 2022 22:17

Finger Prince

rear end-penny posted:

is pulling the hat down over my eyes and going back to sleep an option?

The most sensible option imo

# ? May 14, 2022 22:22

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rear end-penny posted:

is pulling the hat down over my eyes and going back to sleep an option?

are you kidding? a tavern full of wizards is like a barrel of unstable gunpowder in a fire factory

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# ? May 14, 2022 22:26

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

in any moment, insane old bearded dudes are going to be throwing balls of fire, opening portals to hell, turn people into mushrooms, the whole wizard menu

you should open a portal to hell and escape

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# ? May 14, 2022 22:28

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also turn some dudes into mushrooms or throw fireballs at them, i guess

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# ? May 14, 2022 22:31

Ass-penny

Nosfereefer posted:

are you kidding? a tavern full of wizards is like a barrel of unstable gunpowder in a fire factory

reminds me of home :allears:

also lmao you seem convinced all of your problems are started and solved by portals to hell.

thank you so much to nesamdoom for the scurry fall sig!

(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ #YesNutNovember - add this to your sig if you love and support BYOB's own nut

# ? May 14, 2022 22:32

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

rear end-penny posted:

reminds me of home

also lmao you seem convinced all of your problems are started and solved by portals to hell.

ill be honest, these days you'll probably run into even more wizards by going to hell, since everybody portals there to escape wizard consequences for their wizard actions

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# ? May 14, 2022 22:44

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# ? May 3, 2024 07:07

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

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# ? May 14, 2022 22:45

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > ITT you wake up on a tavern floor, wizarding hat over eyes.