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-the bastille was a castle in paris where the king of france kept all his underpants. he had a lot of underpants, way more than anyone else in france, and alot of people in france had no underpants at all (they were called 'sans cullotes' which means 'without pants' in french) and they got real mad about it and in 1789 they stormed the bastille to get some of the king of france's underpants and that's how the french revolution started |
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Jul 14, 2022 13:35
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| # ? May 6, 2024 21:57 |
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-once they stole all the king of france's underpants, they were still really mad at him and his wife for all the years that their balls chafed and they left skidmarks on their real pants, so they decided to cut off the king and queen of france's heads. The queen of france was a very wise woman and tried to placate the mob with cake, because everyone loves cake it usually will calm an angry mob, but in this instance, probably because they were all fired up about having a revolution, the mob could not be placated with cakes, so they cut off the queen of france's head while a mean lady named madame defarge watched
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Jul 14, 2022 13:38
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-after that there was a period of time called the rain of terror. it rained for about three years because this guy called robespierre was in charge. he had a really sick robe that kept him dry so he didnt care that everyone was wet all the time
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Jul 14, 2022 13:40
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-as you might imagine, people got pretty of being frickin wet all the time in the entire nation of france! rivers flooded, crops failed, everything mildewed, and eventually got off robespierre's head to make the rain stop, so that plan pretty much backfired for robespierre
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Jul 14, 2022 13:41
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- It was for this reason, in the wake of the American Revolution against Great Britain, that the revolutionaries adopted the rallying cry "I see London, I see France!" |
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Jul 14, 2022 13:41
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-after that a really short guy from corsica (wherever that is) called napoleon bonaparte took over. people called him boney which is a pretty cool or lame nickname depending on who you ask. He did a whole lot of stuff real fast which was either really awesome or the worst thing ever, depending on who you ask. he was really good at fighting battles and basically kicked everyone's rear end for about 10 years
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Jul 14, 2022 13:43
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-this boney dude had major short guy syndrome though, and decided to compensate for it and his tiny peen by invading the biggest country ever. That was a disaster for him and his french army (actually there were a whole lot fo poles and saxons and dutch in his army too) but it was pretty awesome for everyone else who thought napoleon was lame. tehy got together and formed like 7th coalition or something, and chased him all the way back to leipzig in saxony and beat his rear end in a big thing called the battle of nations, as if all the other battles weren't also fought between nations
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Jul 14, 2022 13:45
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-anyway then they got a new king of france. he was kind of lame, i don't know where they found him
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Jul 14, 2022 13:46
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-the first couple napoleon movies had been real box office hits so the decided to bring him back for another installment called 'the hundred days' pretty good title, imo, but it was the last movie in the series and kind of lame. not subtle at all, it's like boney was totally phoning it in, just there for the paycheck. they did all the usual napoleon tropes-big artillery battery, the old guard, dramatic cavalry charge, all that stale old crap, but he was easily defeated by some lazy british dudes who decided to lie down on the other side of a hill.
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Jul 14, 2022 13:49
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-i think they found a new king after that, maybe it was the same one they brought back before. he was super lame tho.
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Jul 14, 2022 13:49
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google THIS posted:- It was for this reason, in the wake of the American Revolution against Great Britain, that the revolutionaries adopted the rallying cry "I see London, I see France!"
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Jul 14, 2022 13:50
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-the kingdom of france was founded in 1386 during the hundred years war by a french lady named joan who lived under an arch. she was the queen of france, but idk, then some people decided she was a witch and set her on fire. never quite understood that one.
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Jul 14, 2022 13:53
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-franch owned a big chunk of canada for a while. I'm not sure how or why
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Jul 14, 2022 13:53
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-as a result of this, it is illegal in canada to make fun of french-speaking people, but it is completely legal to make fun of the outrageously silly nation of france
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Jul 14, 2022 13:54
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google THIS posted:- It was for this reason, in the wake of the American Revolution against Great Britain, that the revolutionaries adopted the rallying cry "I see London, I see France!"
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Jul 14, 2022 14:03
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| # ? May 6, 2024 21:57 |
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what's everyone doin' for 'tille day anyway? as a nod to the history I'm wearing underpants today, but this is NOT a precedent, don't get used to it or anything.
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Jul 14, 2022 14:10
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