|
|
when you awaken in your pod you’ll find you’ve been pissing, making GBS threads, crying, throwing up & jacking off. gl all of zion is counting on you |
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 05:02
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 3, 2024 10:22 |
|
|
|
neo stop logging into the matrix to eat pizza without getting fat it’s straining our servers
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 05:21
|
|
|
if you cum in the matrix, you cum for real
---------------- |
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 05:46
|
|
|
you think that's air you're breathing?  it's actually cum
---------------- |
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 05:47
|
|
|
Agent Smith using bullet time moves to catch the sprays in his mouth 
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 05:52
|
|
|
The Oracle walks in on NEO watching porn on her computer |
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 10:08
|
|
|
|
tank, load the "how to not make a mess with our weird space toilets" program ... again 
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 13:12
|
|
|
Logging into the matrix to smoke weed and chill since zion still hasn't legalized.
https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 13:19
|
|
|
|
bet you feel kinda foolish the real estate agent talked you into buying the house with extra bedrooms "think of the space you'll have" she said, chuckling internally because she knew you are and probably forever will be living in a standard MatrixPod(tm) just like the rest of us would you like us to show you the solarium? ahahaha haha haa
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 14:31
|
|
|
morpheus watching neo fire up his spliff: he's beginning to smoke weed |
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 14:34
|
|
|
....and that's why everything tastes like sheet cake. Anyways, happy matrix birthday, Neo! |
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 16:49
|
|
|
|
barnold posted:morpheus watching neo fire up his spliff: he's beginning to smoke weed lol
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 16:59
|
|
|
|
Turns out Neo isn't The One, Morpheus is just dyslexic. |
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 17:13
|
|
|
|
"why do my eyes hurt?" "you've never used them before" "why do i walk like a toddler who doesn't understand how knees work yet" "you have no muscle memory lol. please keep stumping around it's hilarious"
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 17:16
|
|
|
|
When Morpheus teaches Neo what the matrix is, instead of a martial arts dojo, it's a high school linear algebra class and instead of the line "I know kung-fu" it's "I know math" and the whole movie is just Neo fighting the machines by solving complicated math problems. |
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 17:35
|
|
|
Finger Prince posted:When Morpheus teaches Neo what the matrix is, instead of a martial arts dojo, it's a high school linear algebra class and instead of the line "I know kung-fu" it's "I know math" and the whole movie is just Neo fighting the machines by solving complicated math problems. You've both made the Matrix more real and horribly boring in one move. Congradulations on this feat and I'll now never again see the matris as more that nerd fantasy. https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 18:29
|
|
|
|
neo… enter the matrix *neo enters the matrix* a surprise birthday party with all my friends!!! actually Neo these are all programs your real friends are still making GBS threads and cumming in their matrix pods
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 22:07
|
|
|
Originally The Matrix was supposed to be a trilogy with 2 and a half of them being the shower needed to get pod junk off of him. they skipped that scene and made filler movies.
https://i.imgur.com/1qBoiAi.mp4
|
|
#
?
Sep 3, 2022 23:56
|
|
|
you get used to it. i dont even see the code. all i see is blonde, bbw, milf, amateur... |
|
#
?
Sep 4, 2022 00:38
|
|
|
|
The machine's plan fails because Cypher likes his steak well done |
|
#
?
Sep 4, 2022 00:59
|
|
|
Does Neo forget kung fu when he leaves the matrix? |
|
#
?
Sep 4, 2022 01:50
|
|
|
|
We'll Neo, based on your browser history you already know exactly how deep the rabbit hole goes. But as I was saying, two pills |
|
#
?
Sep 4, 2022 02:29
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 3, 2024 10:22 |
|
|
Morpheous: "You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes." Neo: "Yo, man, I just wanted to buy some weed." |
|
#
?
Sep 4, 2022 12:03
|
|