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dog is gaslighting me, my husband left me to live with an old woman in a giant shoe, there's a goose honking at me and making GBS threads all over the place with a little girl and some sheep screaming about golden eggs and tuffets. and I'm here to kick your rear end.
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Mar 11, 2023 14:07
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| # ? Apr 28, 2024 00:23 |
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opened the cupboards to give my dog a bone, and everything is gone. ransacked, not even milk bones for the dog. I'll kick their asses, right now.
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Mar 11, 2023 14:08
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update: the asses were ransacked too
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Mar 11, 2023 14:52
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Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:update: the asses were ransacked too and here I am, all out of bubblegum. son of a BISCUIT.
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Mar 11, 2023 15:01
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i came here to chew rear end and kick bubblegum, and
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Mar 11, 2023 18:03
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i am one tough mother goose. my goose children know with me its my way or the highway. up past 9 pm? thats a feathering. re regurgitate my regurgitated food? thats a feathering. fall asleep during my oc self insert bedtime fiction? feathering. its important to instill a sense of character in your children so one day they see the value of being miserable. i come from a long line of tough mother geese and my mother would have poo poo a golden egg if i pulled any of this crap
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Mar 11, 2023 18:03
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I want you to go in that bag and find my wallet. Which one is it? It's the one that says bad mother hubbard on it.
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Mar 13, 2023 14:10
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got hosed up on honey and woke up with a strange girl in my bed. yes, i am a bear, and yes i forgot the difference between fairy tales and nursery rhymes
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Mar 13, 2023 15:04
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| # ? Apr 28, 2024 00:23 |
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*stumbles out of the house in the middle of the night* What the hell is all the racket out here? What is that cat doing? Why is my good china on the lawn? What is that dog laughing a- *gets crushed by a falling cow* |
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Mar 14, 2023 04:03
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