|
Ralph Crammed In posted:What was up with all the compulsive liars? I knew two. I just remembered a girl from work who wasn't a compulsive liar but: she told her little brother (also worked there) that she was pregánte and had to get an abortion and it would cost 50€ so could he give her 50€ right now before their parents find out. She wasn't pergamot she just needed drinkin money for the week-end. And the reason I know this happened is she told everyone "oh yeah I didn't have any money so this is how I got 50€ off my stupid kid brother lmaoooooo".
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 12:18
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 12, 2024 05:03 |
|
|
EorayMel posted:One time I was told the story of REDMOON LEGBONE(or it was REDBONE LEGBONE) who was an evil indestructible skeleton who would chase you and kill you by ripping your legs off if you went to a cemetery at midnight when I was a dumb stupid idiot child and I was very scared for a long time My friend said that the statue of Mary outside the Catholic Church on my street came to life and stretched his arms out to him so he ran away and heard a knock at his window that night and the statue was there, grinning. He also said that the Childline poster in the school nurses office came to life and beckoned to him. Both stories scared gently caress out of me.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 13:30
|
|
|
Dr. Fraiser Chain posted:I had to read poorly scanned original survey notes from the 1850s to the 1880s and that poo poo is virtually unfuckingreadable I had to edit FDA batch records with this poo poo written on it, just straight trash
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 13:33
|
|
|
3D Megadoodoo posted:I just remembered a girl from work who wasn't a compulsive liar but: she told her little brother (also worked there) that she was pregánte and had to get an abortion and it would cost 50€ so could he give her 50€ right now before their parents find out. She wasn't pergamot she just needed drinkin money for the week-end. That's got a clear goal - she wanted the 50 eurofunbux and got it. I suppose compulsive liars want the attention. It's a pretty high risk game if you ask me, but I haven't got that particular breed of brainworms so idk
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 14:49
|
|
|
Ralph Crammed In posted:That's got a clear goal - she wanted the 50 eurofunbux and got it. I suppose compulsive liars want the attention. It's a pretty high risk game if you ask me, but I haven't got that particular breed of brainworms so idk Maybe it's an addiction, like Lego Star Wars? (I bet there's better minds than mine who've actually done research on that but I'm too lazy to look it up.)
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 15:06
|
|
|
Ralph Crammed In posted:That's got a clear goal - she wanted the 50 eurofunbux and got it. I suppose compulsive liars want the attention. It's a pretty high risk game if you ask me, but I haven't got that particular breed of brainworms so idk Why was the girl alleging to be pregnant with her brother's child, and who was she lying to in that story
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 15:43
|
|
|
Chewbecca posted:Why was the girl alleging to be pregnant with her brother's child, and who was she lying to in that story No.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 20:04
|
|
|
“I don’t want that promotion, dude. I don’t want the responsibility; gently caress that. Go ahead and apply, Elf. I’m not.” Seven months later he gets the promotion.
|
|
#
?
May 19, 2023 20:26
|
|
|
MrQwerty posted:That same dipshit totally didn't canoe bin Laden and gently caress everything up You just reminded me of another bullshit story- “We killed the actual factual bin laden in 2011 and not unceremoniously almost immediately after the afghan invasion began”
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 02:59
|
|
|
I worked with a guy who was a former UPS driver who claimed he had all kinds of sexual escapades in the back of one of the trucks. But before that he told me the deliveries were a constant grind and you couldn't go home until your truck was empty so the delivery men are constantly running around like madmen. So I find his story very hard to believe. He was also a 37 year old man who'd never cooked or cleaned for himself because he always had his mother or a girlfriend do it for him. Not a bullshit story but one day he was talking about how expensive it is to rent porn (this was like 2009). So I was like "Dude, you know you can get that poo poo for free on the internet right?". He was bewildered. The next day he comes in and practically yells "Hey, [my name]! I checked out porno tube like you said!". He was a big goofy moron. Most of the people I worked with were varying degrees of weird and/or terrible. One lady got poo poo canned because she use to shoot up in the bathroom and then go back to her work station. This happened more than once before they did anything about it. Her job was quality inspector on artificial kneecaps. Futanari Damacy posted:This “video” you watched was just the movie “Con Air” It's not a "These hands are registered weapons!" thing. It's more of a "Don't be a tough guy, no outcome is worth it." deal. Ralph Hurley posted:These stories reminded me of the time an army recruiter visited one of my classes in loving 7th grade. Obviously they weren’t signing up 13 year olds but they were trying to get everyone (boys only) excited about becoming real life army men. Two uniformed dudes occupied my study hall pointing out skinny weaklings and fat slobs and yelling about how they were going to whip them into shape. Followed by a demonstration of the kind of demeaning drill sarge “you little maggot!” screaming we would be subjected to on the first day of boot camp. All the bullies and jocks were loving psyched that day but I was like sir no sir this poo poo is not for me. This is horrifying. It's bad enough recruiters go to schools but this is just bald faced fascism.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 03:52
|
|
|
CPL593H posted:I worked with a guy who was a former UPS driver who claimed he had all kinds of sexual escapades in the back of one of the trucks. When I worked as a driver helper for UPS during the holidays in highschool one of the dudes I was working with told me that ladies would open the door naked all the time and try to get him to come in lol
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 04:10
|
|
|
CPL593H posted:This is horrifying. It's bad enough recruiters go to schools but this is just bald faced fascism. It was interesting to read about how big that was for the first Gulf War as well, guess there were concerns about selling it to the American people.
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 04:13
|
|
|
Genesplicer posted:I remember in 5th grade there was a kid in our class who was a chronic liar. If he were an old man, he would be called a "Spinner of Tall Tales". In 5th grade, he was just a liar. He loved to tell us how relatives died in horrible ways. My mom once taught a third-grader like this. Most of his stories were fun stupid kid lies (like the pet rattlesnake he fed rabbit blood to), but he definitely once said that his dad had been crushed to death by a truck, and Mom had to call the kid's house just to check, because... you never know, right? (The compulsive liar kid's dad was still alive. No truck-crushing incident had occurred.)
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 04:40
|
|
|
"Just get out there, you'll find somebody!" "Don't worry about being rejected, you'll find somebody!" "You don't have to go out looking for someone, you will just find each other!" lies
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 08:13
|
|
|
Those are actually all true. You’ll find someone- but someone you like? Well, that requires a little more initiative...
|
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 08:47
|
|
|
Futanari Damacy posted:Those are actually all true. You’ll find someone- but someone you like? Well, that requires a little more initiative... Nope, I'm a Nothingman. It's not that I make a bad first impression, it's that I make no impression at all over time I make great friends, but the dating scenes means I am nothing CannonFodder fucked around with this message at 09:11 on May 20, 2023 |
|
#
?
May 20, 2023 09:08
|
|
|
"People are inherently good."
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 01:51
|
|
|
CannonFodder posted:Nope, I'm a Nothingman. Are you me?
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 02:58
|
|
|
Just about anything ever said by a school administrator, especially at the college level.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 05:51
|
|
|
Cabbages and Kings posted:"Sign up for the army, I will buy you a keg of beer and you don't even have to go, just sign this poo poo and then don't show up, it's fine!!" (12th grade) 
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 06:02
|
|
|
I had a high school counselor tell me that going to an unaccredited college was a Great Idea. I don't see eye to eye with my parents on a lot of things, but I will forever be grateful that they steered me away from that Absolute loving Bullshit.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 06:15
|
|
|
Futanari Damacy posted:You need to learn cursive writing! Alllll of your correspondence in your adult life, without exception, is going to be written in cursive! Nobody will take anything you write seriously if it’s not written in cursive. Printing is for dumb stupid babies and not for serious people who want good jobs. What’s a “computer”? I was assigned cursive writing homework all throughout grade school and I will never stop being mad about it. Had reams of those stupid pre-printed cursive practice sheets with the dotted lines everywhere. Years later my dad would just tell me to write in all capital letters because that's what he does. He was right, and all of the miserable shitheads who rode my rear end nonstop about my handwriting were wrong. Thanks Dad. 
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 06:32
|
|
|
olives black posted:I had a high school counselor tell me that going to an unaccredited college was a Great Idea. What's an unaccredited college (with me)?
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 07:59
|
|
|
olives black posted:I had a high school counselor tell me that going to an unaccredited college was a Great Idea. What was their reasoning, like was it a trade school prep thing or a Devry scam?
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 21:30
|
|
|
Haptical Sales Slut posted:What was their reasoning, like was it a trade school prep thing or a Devry scam? It was Baker College. Wikipedia posted:The college has been accused of predatory practices. In 2022, a ProPublica and Detroit Free Press investigation titled "The Nonprofit College That Spends More on Marketing Than Financial Aid" highlighted its low graduation rate and high student debt rate compared to comparable institutions, as well as its unconventional management structure. That month, Baker College threatened legal action against a former faculty member relating to a non-disparagement clause included in a settlement with Baker.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 23:00
|
|
|
Chewbecca posted:What's an unaccredited college (with me)? give me $5000 and I will mail you a piece of paper that says you are a doctor of whatever the gently caress you want.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 23:32
|
|
|
Nooner posted:give me $5000 and I will mail you a piece of paper that says you are a doctor of whatever the gently caress you want. You can't beat this deal folks
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 23:43
|
|
|
olives black posted:It was Baker College. drat that’s even worse. Glad you saw through the bullshit.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 23:43
|
|
|
Haptical Sales Slut posted:drat that’s even worse. Glad you saw through the bullshit. I was young and dumb and did not. My parents did. Took me until I was in my 30s to be able to see through their bullshit, but theirs was far less expensive for me.
|
|
#
?
May 22, 2023 23:50
|
|
|
Going back to welding for a sec; My dad was a welder for several years and apparently got pretty good - then he'd had enough of that stuff and went on to make hose, of all things. I did some welding in shop class in HS, when I told him what we were up to and showed him some of my work he smirked and said "Good times, huh?" But did say I did a pretty good job for someone who'd never done it before, and gave me some pointers, so that was kinda cool
|
|
#
?
May 23, 2023 01:59
|
|
|
BigBeefCity posted:Going back to welding for a sec; *Points at thread title, nods sagely* (Sorry, beef)
|
|
#
?
May 23, 2023 02:27
|
|
|
CHaKKaWaKka posted:Told me on his way out of a Walmart late at night he saw someone breaking into his car. He kicked his rear end then called the cops and the cops told him that they needed more people like him and he should consider becoming a cop. It's obviously a bullshit story but made me laugh that he was saying the cops were going around recruiting people based on their ability to whoop some rear end. Lol. poo poo. Was applying for some crappy gas station job. One of the questions on the application was 'T/F Is marijuana use more dangerous than alcohol use' Manager told me he had to bend a few rules for me to get the job because I answered false. Told him that he had a point. See, my brother just drank himself to death earlier that month after alcoholism lead him to a state of vagrancy halfway across the country. If it wasn't for Kamala Harris' crackdown on marijuana, he'd be back home recovering from hitting rock bottom instead of puking the last of his life force out on the ground in a cold alleyway in LA. A miserably, lonely death his family only only found out months after the fact after his parole officer finally bothered to track down his next of kin to send the ashes to. So yes, the idiocy in this country about marijuana put on fine display with this here questionnaire was clearly more dangerous than the alcohol usage.
|
|
#
?
May 23, 2023 03:53
|
|
|
killer_robot posted:Lol. poo poo. Was applying for some crappy gas station job. One of the questions on the application was 'T/F Is marijuana use more dangerous than alcohol use' jesus loving christ I'm sorry to hear that. Absolute loving demon cracker nation.
|
|
#
?
May 23, 2023 04:15
|
|
|
Er, earlier that month we'd heard my brother drank himself to death. He'd passed 3 months previous to us ever finding out about it. Thanks it was .. a while ago, so I'm mostly over it. Worst part was when my step brother who skipped out on $50 bail for being a general idiot the judge wanted out of the state to be someone else's problem decided to come back for the wake. He was in town for about 4 hours before the cops picked him up, then had him spend the night in custody before send him back to the same judge who put him on bail for $50 dollars again and told him to stay away longer. My family is the greatest ~ killer_robot fucked around with this message at 04:27 on May 23, 2023 |
|
#
?
May 23, 2023 04:23
|
|
|
Don't worry about this, leave it with me. E: ^^ poo poo, that really does suck. Sorry 
Outrail fucked around with this message at 04:50 on May 23, 2023 |
|
#
?
May 23, 2023 04:36
|
|
|
“Work hard in school now so you don’t have to work hard when you’re older!” Could have just told me to have fun and enjoy childhood, tbqh (Not that I do work hard but man what a waste of effort at a time when I could have been getting really, really good at Donkey Kong Country)
|
|
#
?
May 23, 2023 04:42
|
|
|
"Just need to check that your hair is growing in right!" Mum was looking for head lice, but I'm glad that was the little story she used to check mine and my brothers heads.
|
|
#
?
May 24, 2023 07:25
|
|
|
A Bobcat jumped out of a tree and I chased it down the road with a big stick
|
|
#
?
May 24, 2023 15:00
|
|
|
More of just a lying kid thing than a specifically bullshit story, but in seventh grade we had a kid who did a stand up comedy act for the talent show. He got a lot of laughs but what none of us knew was rather than just being a naturally funny guy and working a tight 5, he stole all his bits from comedians on Comedy Central shows (which none of us watched). After a while he quietly got called out on it and stopped doing it altogether. But he never did learn the lesson of originality and just began quoting South Park and other shows to kids without cable. Needless to say he didn’t have a budding career in comedy and now works as an underling in some kitchen. Had he actually put effort in and tried to develop his own material, who knows where he’d be now!
|
|
#
?
May 25, 2023 01:02
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 12, 2024 05:03 |
|
|
Futanari Damacy posted:More of just a lying kid thing than a specifically bullshit story, but in seventh grade we had a kid who did a stand up comedy act for the talent show. He got a lot of laughs but what none of us knew was rather than just being a naturally funny guy and working a tight 5, he stole all his bits from comedians on Comedy Central shows (which none of us watched). After a while he quietly got called out on it and stopped doing it altogether. But he never did learn the lesson of originality and just began quoting South Park and other shows to kids without cable. Needless to say he didn’t have a budding career in comedy and now works as an underling in some kitchen. Had he actually put effort in and tried to develop his own material, who knows where he’d be now! A girl stole Jack handey quotes for a newspaper thing in 8th grade and tried to pass them off as her own and I called her out in front of the whole class and I was the rear end in a top hat because she was popular 
|
|
#
?
May 25, 2023 15:35
|
|