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im gonna sentence someone to death 
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Mar 26, 2024 05:02
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Careful not to do it on opposite day.
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Mar 26, 2024 05:08
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It's kinda depressing to see what your average fellow citizen is like, when you're milling about in the pool of potential jurors being questioned. I imagine this only intensifies if you're selected. I was almost picked. I was in the jury box when the defendant's lawyer nixed me with their final voir dire. They were whispering about it first and glancing at me, so I think I must have given them cop vibes. Jokes on them though, because I definitely assume the copsnsre lying about everything
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Mar 26, 2024 05:24
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There's a rule for jury selection (in some states) where for the defendant to preserve certain appellate rights, they have to use every single one of their preemptory challenges. Those challenges are the ones where the defendant can kick anyone off the jury for any reason. The prosecutor can use a preemptory challenge for any reason that isn't racist, which is often hard for them, but I digress. This leads to sometimes having a perfectly fine jury but the defendant wants to appeal something so he has to use every single challenge, which just is this crazy awkward parade of perfectly normal people getting called up to the box and them having to answer questions then get excused. I've seen this parade of jurors take forever while the judge is pissed, the prosecutor is rolling his eyes, and all the jurors are super confused and angry. Anyway sometimes getting kicked off the jury has nothing to do with you.
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Mar 26, 2024 05:43
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Earwicker posted:i was a juror on a three week murder trial in manhattan poo poo, I've watched every episode of both And most of the spin-offs And I have a jury summons in a few weeks Hopefully they look past this character flaw and accept me
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Mar 26, 2024 05:53
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You know goons are at a good age when most are looking forward to jury duty as a way to just do something different lol
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Mar 26, 2024 06:03
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One time I had jurt duty and I had to drive 45 minutes to go to the courthouse and when we got there the lady was like "yeah actually we're good we figured it out yesterday"
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Mar 26, 2024 06:06
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BigHead posted:any reason that isn't racist Provably racist! Technically it's 'due to a protected class, like race or gender'. You'd have to be a dumb motherfucker to get caught though, as a preemptive strike can be for 'his shirt clashed with the person next to him' or 'he was paying too much attention'. syntaxfunction posted:You know goons are at a good age when most are looking forward to jury duty as a way to just do something different lol I wish I got selected for jury duty more often. “I have been trying to get on jury duty every year since I was 18 years old. To get and go sit in an air-conditioned room, downtown, judging people, while my lunch was paid for. That is the life.”
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Mar 26, 2024 06:11
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This is a grand jury For me to poop in
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Mar 26, 2024 06:18
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syntaxfunction posted:You know goons are at a good age when most are looking forward to jury duty as a way to just do something different lol It was immediately obvious why we were selected when we first started getting to know each other. It was a couple of retired conservatives, a few of us liberal professionals trying to get work done during recesses and then like 4 people that I honestly did not believe existed before the trial, they were like, air. I figured they would have opinions when we began deliberations and they were just like, undecided voters literally exist and they are in the room with me. It was almost creepy, like 4 of you in this room don't know and don't care what ice is.
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Mar 26, 2024 06:18
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By popular demand posted:do you get lunch in jury duty? I feel like a good lunch would be a good exchange for a day of listening* to lawyers argue. No lunch, but I was told there are pastries and coffee. I'll be upset if that is a lie.
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Mar 26, 2024 11:32
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I’m 55 and always throw the jury duty papers away. Haven’t been arrested yet. Yet.
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Mar 26, 2024 11:54
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Anderson Koopa posted:Interesting, I figured the burden of proof was probably lower. I suspect they do the whole Grand / Petit Juries for a couple of reasons. A grand jury indictment lets you skip a step in the adversarial system because you're making a finding of probable cause. Absent an indictment, a defendant would have a timely opportunity to test the evidence against them at a preliminary hearing. By letting prosecutors skip this step they get to bring state power through pretrial confinement/release to bear to bully people into plea deals/catch them doing other poo poo. They can be good: they let a victim avoid having to face their abuser at the prelim stage and they can shield the identity of undercovers or informants. They can be bad: the prosecutor has sole control of evidence presented and doesn't have to tell you that the thing they're showing you is likely to be surpressed at trial. They also don't have to present evidence that is unfavorable to their case. Basically if you're ever on a grand jury and you aren't dealing almost exclusively with weeping victims or undercover cops your prosecutor is using you to bootstrap weak sisters that wouldn't survive a prelim.
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Mar 26, 2024 12:17
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Anderson Koopa posted:Interesting, I figured the burden of proof was probably lower. I suspect they do the whole Grand / Petit Juries for a couple of reasons. I did the grand jury thing a few years back. I got to be foreman, because nobody else wanted it. So I was the one who swore in all the witnesses, and all of the indictments have my signature on them, and may be worth money someday. We did not get any kind of refreshments, so I used my own money to buy a coffee maker and coffee to keep in our break room, and we did potluck treats. We actually did meet in an actual courtroom, but we got to sit in the comfy chairs around a table instead of in the jury box. Most of our cases were pretty boring, just one after another "pulled over for speeding and found meth syringes in the car." We did have a handful of murders and some really unpleasant assault cases. In order to keep everyone paying attention during the boring cases, I made bingo cards with "meth syringe" being the free space in the middle. If you got a bingo, I handed out dollar store prizes like fans or mugs or fancy pens. In 18 months we had maybe 5 or 6 "no true bill" cases that we utterly rejected. Almost everything did get sent through because the bar was "probable cause" that a crime occurred, not "beyond reasonable doubt." We were specifically instructed not to argue based on the strength of the case, because that is what the actual trial is for. A lot of cases were obviously pretty weak and I am sure they got pleaded down or lost in court. But it was really common that we would strike out one or two charges on an indictment, because the testimony was insufficient. And because I am a pedantic goon, I actually read every indictment carefully and would send them back to be re-done if they had typos. I am sure the clerks loved me.
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Mar 26, 2024 12:19
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Earwicker posted:i was a juror on a three week murder trial in manhattan "All this" involved trying to cast the plaintiff as an opiate addict but I guess he didn't read his own evidence because he presented a drs visit complaining of med seeking but the med seeking was IM steroids and then also presented another drs visit where the defendant refused opiates while seeking IM steroids because "I can just go smoke weed if I want to manage pain." I don't know if it was his playbook originally or he realized he lost the room but he spent his entire closing argument trying to sneak in a recommendation for jury nullification because tort is out of control! and mentioning nothing of any evidence and the plaintiff lawyer had to object at one point "I am not a billboard injury lawyer and the case has nothing to do with billboard injury lawyers and ambulance chasers." Judgement for the plaintiff that probably just paid his immediate medical bills and the lawyer. Anyway I got 3 sandwiches and will get $80 in 6 months and
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Mar 26, 2024 14:45
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hot cocoa on the couch posted:i want to do jury duty
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Mar 26, 2024 16:21
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Just do what I did: show up, stay long enough to get marked as present, then puke your guts out in the bathroom to get excused and still have it count
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Mar 26, 2024 16:29
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Judge will often ask poo poo like "Does anyone on the jury feel like they are unable to be impartial?" as like an almost threatening question but that's actually your opportunity to raise your hand and say "Actaully yeah I would never find another person guilty in court" and that's a pretty good way to not get selected I think
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Mar 26, 2024 17:24
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Konar posted:Judge will often ask poo poo like "Does anyone on the jury feel like they are unable to be impartial?" as like an almost threatening question but that's actually your opportunity to raise your hand and say "Actaully yeah I would never find another person guilty in court" and that's a pretty good way to not get selected I think Depends. When I was chosen for grand jury, the judge literally said he would not remove anyone who said that, so don't even try. The only people he excused were a woman whose husband was undergoing cancer treatment, and she needed to drive him to the hospital three times a week, and a man who was moving out of the county within six months. Otherwise, if you answered "yes" to "do you live in X county" and "no" to "do you have a life-or-death reason not to be here on Wednesdays" you were in.
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Mar 26, 2024 17:32
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wheatpuppy posted:Depends. When I was chosen for grand jury, the judge literally said he would not remove anyone who said that, so don't even try. The only people he excused were a woman whose husband was undergoing cancer treatment, and she needed to drive him to the hospital three times a week, and a man who was moving out of the county within six months. Otherwise, if you answered "yes" to "do you live in X county" and "no" to "do you have a life-or-death reason not to be here on Wednesdays" you were in. I forgot the exact question we were asked but it was basically anyone that would have mental trouble with hearing about graphic descriptions of sexual violence is free to go. I was like, sure, hearing about someone being raped would be disturbing but its not going to keep me up at night. I mean, I'm a consumer of news media, awful rapes are reported on all the time, it's disturbing but like not nightmare inducing. The things this guy did to these women were just unimaginable, I remember thinking I would be begging him to go ahead and kill me already.
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Mar 26, 2024 17:44
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I'm 45 years old and have never once received a jury duty summons. What the gently caress is wrong with me?? You think you're too good for me Mr Justice?
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Mar 26, 2024 18:06
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Impossibly Perfect Sphere posted:I'm 45 years old and have never once received a jury duty summons. do you vote? are you registered?
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Mar 26, 2024 18:09
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Earwicker posted:do you vote? are you registered? Yes! Yes!
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Mar 26, 2024 18:13
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do you have a drivers license? maybe your county is just really bad at this. edit: i forgot to check, are you american? if you are a brit or something you cant just come over here and be on our juries. we don't have the right kind of wigs.
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Mar 26, 2024 18:15
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Earwicker posted:do you have a drivers license? maybe your county is just really bad at this. Yes!
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Mar 26, 2024 18:15
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I wasn't on the jury rolls for something like 8 years because there was a computer glitch when I moved to the parish that took them 10 years to figure out (i.e. it started before I even moved there) and 3 years to fix. Sometimes the birthday paradox just means your number never comes up.
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Mar 26, 2024 18:23
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My birthday is on Christmas. I've always wondered if that had something to do with it.
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Mar 26, 2024 18:24
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Regalingualius posted:Just do what I did: show up, stay long enough to get marked as present, then puke your guts out in the bathroom to get excused and still have it count Unfortunately I've already been selected. Next time I'll try that though.
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Mar 26, 2024 19:41
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I found a different way to always get rejected for jury duty for criminal cases - I attended and graduated from a police academy. During voir dire, there's always going to be the question "is anyone here a cop?" Optional versions might ask if you're related to one. In some states, you have to already be hired by a police department to attend a police academy (Kentucky now does this). In some states, the community college system offers the classes to anyone who signs up (California did this back then). The program ranges from 1 semester to 2 years depending on state.
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Mar 26, 2024 20:59
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Konar posted:Judge will often ask poo poo like "Does anyone on the jury feel like they are unable to be impartial?" as like an almost threatening question but that's actually your opportunity to raise your hand and say "Actaully yeah I would never find another person guilty in court" and that's a pretty good way to not get selected I think Last time I had Jury Duty there was a dude who straight up said, in the most diplomatic way possible, that he hated cops and would not believe anything they said. He wasn’t being rude about it or belligerent, he just said it matter of factly during the selection questions. The prosecution then spent a while trying to catch him in a lie about this but he stuck to his guns. Eventually they excused him. It was kinda awesome actually.
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Mar 26, 2024 22:40
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