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the anti femi nazi posted:So I am a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding this coming weekend. We are all getting ready for the ceremony in what will be the couples wedding suite that night, and I was thinking of leaving a few things in there for the new couple (champagne, candles). I was wondering if any of you new or soon to be brides/grooms could think of anything that you would like to have in your wedding suite as a surprise. In a magazine recently I read that a bride and groom were surprised with some wrapped sandwiches left in their room fridge, and it seems like such a good idea because they will be going there tired after such a long day and probably haven't had a chance to properly eat and might really appreciate them after they have their romantic alone time. I know that it's something I'm planning to do for my own wedding.
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Oct 29, 2008 04:10
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Thanks that sounds like something they both would like, and would be very easy to do.
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Oct 29, 2008 04:23
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goatse guy posted:Everything about your wedding is beautiful! Your photographer did a really nice job of capturing the day. Thanks! I can't recommend my photographer highly enough. Going through the pictures later I really noticed how she encourages silliness and has a great eye for candids. Examples:    the anti femi nazi posted:So I am a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding this coming weekend. We are all getting ready for the ceremony in what will be the couples wedding suite that night, and I was thinking of leaving a few things in there for the new couple (champagne, candles). I was wondering if any of you new or soon to be brides/grooms could think of anything that you would like to have in your wedding suite as a surprise. One of my bridesmaids did an amazing job on our honeymoon suite. She left flowers, chocolates, tons of wonderful smelling tealight candles, matches, pre-chilled champagne, and rose petals galore (I suggest white instead of red petals, by the way). We had an after party so she had a chance to sneak into our room and leave some of our extra food and cake too, which was really nice, since it turns out you barely get to eat at your own wedding. We had wedding cake for breakfast. Some bathroom items which I think might be handy include some kind of pain killer, peppermint cooling foot lotion, and extra shampoo and conditioner. That teeny bottle of hotel conditioner did not cut it on my extremely hair sprayed and teased mess of hair. You are awesome to do this and your friend will be thankful for it! ElanoreMcMantis posted:Also a small paper crane, because I am using them to decorate the reception location by hanging them with ribbon from the trees, along with white lights and these cute little clear glass balls. That sounds really pretty.
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Oct 29, 2008 05:32
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Wow! I just looked at the Wai Ching dresses and good god drat if I ever manage to get married I was this one: http://www.wai-ching.com/lookbook/3/31.jpg Its absolutely gorgeous, and its cheap! I expected them to be incredibly expensive.
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Oct 29, 2008 18:02
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I know! Aren't they great?  I am SO excited to get one. Every time I tell people I'm ordering a dress, custom designed, fit to my measurements, straight from the designer, they go, "Ooohh, isn't that going to be expensive?" then I get to tell them that it's $200 less than the cheap(ish) dress I was considering before!  I love Wai-Ching.
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Oct 29, 2008 21:56
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I have my reception venue! Looking at about $900 before taxes and gratuity for food, room, linen, tableware, tables, chairs, and the dance floor. Estimating $1500 overall with decorations and a dj, and whatever else I may need. It's for 50 so perfect cost and I broke my mom down into paying for the reception, thank the lord jesus krriiissstttt.
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Oct 30, 2008 12:52
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Adri posted:I have my reception venue! Looking at about $900 before taxes and gratuity for food, room, linen, tableware, tables, chairs, and the dance floor. Estimating $1500 overall with decorations and a dj, and whatever else I may need. It's for 50 so perfect cost and I broke my mom down into paying for the reception, thank the lord jesus krriiissstttt. Where the hell are you hosting your wedding that its only $30 a head for everything (except booze).
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Oct 30, 2008 17:11
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^^^^^ Our place is only $19 a head before booze. http://cavallinisinthepark.com/ And that's in a Chicago suburb, where prices are usually at LEAST $50+! We're just lucky because we have a small wedding, so we can get a cool, small place.
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Oct 30, 2008 23:13
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Optimus_Rhyme posted:Where the hell are you hosting your wedding that its only $30 a head for everything (except booze). An extremely tiny golf club. They gave us a break on room rental since we are such a small party and on top of that my sorority has a huge luncheon every year for the past 4-5 years, which is how I found out about it. They rely on word-of-mouth advertising and they has some tasty prime rib hell yes. Plus when we sat down with the kitchen manager and the wedding coordinator they both wanted to get married at our ceremony spot, but their dates are/were during the hellish bug season and they know it wasn't a great idea, but are excited to know we are getting married there. They were cutting deals left and right and were happy to give us advice to save us money (no open bar, get a Publix cake, what's in season for veggies). I'm pleased that we found a small place that works for us and not against. And Wolfenstein  to small weddings.
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Oct 31, 2008 01:46
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clyemne posted:
Inexpensive too! I just can't see the point in spending a ton on a wedding. I mean its 'the most special day', but it is about us and our family and the decor and stuff to me is just a bonus. I want it to be nice, but my Dad makes less than I do and I cant fathom asking him to go into debt for it. The only thing I am letting him buy is the food.
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Oct 31, 2008 14:07
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Adri posted:And Wolfenstein Yay!  I'd love for ours to be as small as yours, but as it stands we're really pushing it at 75 because of our freakin' huge families. I don't know how we wound up with so many cousins...
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Oct 31, 2008 22:43
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I posted much earlier about looking for a vintage or antique-styled ring. Months later and we've picked it up from the jewelers! I'm all antsy waiting to see how he proposes. It's from Reaver's: https://www.reaverdiamond.com. 
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Oct 31, 2008 23:01
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Ben Davis posted:I posted much earlier about looking for a vintage or antique-styled ring. Months later and we've picked it up from the jewelers! I'm all antsy waiting to see how he proposes. It's from Reaver's: https://www.reaverdiamond.com. that ring is gorgeous, I adore vintage rings!
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Oct 31, 2008 23:34
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I posted several pages back to vent about my engagement ring shopping frustrations and got some helpful advice (and a few critics). Well, I shopped around a bit, but she didn't like any rings as much as the first one she picked out (in an expensive mall store, for those who didn't read, forgot, or blocked it out). I eventually went back to them and told them exactly what I had going on, including my price range, and they dropped the price to something I could more readily afford. Well, I bought the ring almost two months ago, and let me tell you, it has been kiling me to keep it hidden away, waiting for the right moment, not spilling the beans. I've stopped just short of referring to it as "my precious." My plan was to propose to her on Halloween night, at a costume party we would be throwing at my apartment, in front of her parents and all of our friends. I wanted all these people we loved to be in on the big moment with us, and figured she would be more touched than just doing it in a nice restaurant or something. Plus, Halloween is her favorite holiday by far, and it has special significance for me too. Well, without further ado...     She said yes! Oh, and here's the ring: 
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Nov 3, 2008 16:09
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I'm one of those people who got off lucky. I paid $0 for my wedding and reception. Why? I sold out and got sponsors. My husband and I met in high school, and since our school had an open lunch, we formed this tradition of going to Arby's every day. Well, when he proposed and we started planning the wedding, we wanted a crazy rear end wedding that nobody would forget. So...we decided to get married at Arby's. We lived in a fairly upscale neighborhood, and the arby's we frequented was a new one, with that cafe style thing going on, it had tall ceilings and really cool skylights, so don't hate on me for getting married at a fast food restaurant, because it wasn't your typical greasy looking joint. We called their corporate office, asking how we'd go about permission to do this, and while the lady on the phone thought we were crazy, she was as excited as we were by the end. After talking to everyone, the manager for the store and the regional guy, figuring out costs, and all like that, we got a letter from the corporate office, telling us that if we gave them formal permission to use the wedding in any future adverts, that they'd cover the complete cost. Of course we jumped on that like a pedo on an eight year old, and planning began. In the end, they paid for all of the dresses and tuxes, all the food (we had roast beef and curly fries for munchies, but they provided prime rib and vegetarian meals for the dinner, we all got to experience what a spiked jamocha shake tastes like (loving awesome), we had a fantastic time, and we still look back on the day with glee. It may seem like a retarded place to get married, but it was fun as hell, we got our unique wedding, and even the people who inittially weren't going to attend because we weren't getting married in the church had a great time. The best thing out of the whole experience was when the woman who initially took our call to find out about this showed up and gave us $1000 in Arby's gift certificates as a gift.
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Nov 3, 2008 19:11
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I DEMAND pictures of the Arby's wedding!
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Nov 4, 2008 01:09
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Captain Melanthe posted:Arby's Wedding HOLY poo poo this deserves its own thread
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Nov 4, 2008 12:39
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peanut posted:HOLY poo poo this deserves its own thread There's video of it, if I get froggy and upload it to YouTube, I just might let people ask me about selling out and having an Arby's wedding. WolfensteinBag posted:I DEMAND pictures of the Arby's wedding! As soon as I go to storage this weekend, the album ended up there when we moved. There's fucktons of them too, my sister did photos, as well as the Arby's-hired guy.
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Nov 4, 2008 23:54
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Okay people, what flowers do I want? I do not know. Carnations and roses bore me, but lillies won't dry well, and Birds of Paradise aren't really bouquet friendly. I can get pretty much whatever I want included in the price of my wedding (unless its crazy exotic), I just have to send them a picture of it. Anyone want to help me find a unique with good box-frame drying potential pretty please? I don't know meanings of flowers or anything good, but our colors are ivory for me, dark teal for the girls, and the boys are in black.
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Nov 6, 2008 23:36
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ElanoreMcMantis posted:Okay people, what flowers do I want? I do not know. Carnations and roses bore me, but lillies won't dry well, and Birds of Paradise aren't really bouquet friendly. I can get pretty much whatever I want included in the price of my wedding (unless its crazy exotic), I just have to send them a picture of it. Anyone want to help me find a unique with good box-frame drying potential pretty please? I don't know meanings of flowers or anything good, but our colors are ivory for me, dark teal for the girls, and the boys are in black. I really like baby's breath for a bouquet. Simple and really elegant looking. I know nothing about drying potential, though.  
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Nov 7, 2008 19:37
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amethystbliss posted:I really like baby's breath for a bouquet. Simple and really elegant looking. I know nothing about drying potential, though. Holy crap I never saw or even thought of that. I've dried sprigs of it before and they turned out cute. This is definitely going on the list.
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Nov 7, 2008 20:15
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Just poking in on here to ask something. My fiancee and I are having an interracial wedding in Canada and her parents expects us to invite well over 100 people to the wedding from the Philippines. Keep in mind that a flight one way is roughly $1500. The parents have implied they would not put any money into it as per their culture (I'm slightly inclined to call BS on this but then I remember pick your battles carefully). I know my parents will help out on the cost (they can't afford a lot), so the majority will fall upon my shoulders as well as my fiancee. We came up with a possible solution to the problem and still keep in touch with "respect" to people I barely know (and don't feel like forking money over for). Send out the invitations 2 weeks prior to the wedding. Now, is this bad etiquette? From my perspective, they will still get the letter and have the "bragging rights" of being "special enough to get invitations" and everyone's happy and we get a small wedding of 35 people. Help? Captain Melanthe posted:Arby Wedding Whoa, this is very clever. I showed this to my fiancee and she took this as a good idea and suggested A&W for both of us. A&W is where my fiancee and I had our first lunch together and still continue to dine there. Thanks for sharing and for the inspiration! quaint bucket fucked around with this message at 08:35 on Nov 11, 2008 |
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Nov 11, 2008 08:29
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If a one way flight is $1500, avoid the possible etiquette issue (and yeah, I'd be a bit peeved if I received an invitation to a distant wedding with only a few days notice) and invite them. Not many of those people are going to fork up $3000 to come.
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Nov 11, 2008 08:34
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LittleCat posted:If a one way flight is $1500, avoid the possible etiquette issue (and yeah, I'd be a bit peeved if I received an invitation to a distant wedding with only a few days notice) and invite them. Not many of those people are going to fork up $3000 to come. Seconding this advice. Most of those people won't be able to afford a $3000 plane trip plus hotel expenses, so they'll RSVP no. It would be extremely awful of you to only give them 2 weeks notice of your wedding. What if they can afford to come, but need to give more notice at work? Or what if they need to get their passport updated? Do you really want to start off your married life by pissing off your wife's entire family? I think not. Please be courteous and give them about 3 months notice.
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Nov 11, 2008 14:05
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Rockwell posted:Send out the invitations 2 weeks prior to the wedding. Yes. I'm sure it seems like a clever idea, but in my opinion it's a dick move. Like someone else said, there might be a few relatives who care about your fiancee enough that they really do want to fly to the US for your wedding. You're basically saying to them "We're technically sending you an invitation, but we're sending it so late that we're implying we don't really want you here". To me, that's more insulting than not sending an invitation at all. Endor fucked around with this message at 19:59 on Nov 11, 2008 |
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Nov 11, 2008 15:17
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Hey hey. I'm starting to plan a wedding for late October 2009 in Orlando, but it is just so overwhelming and intimidating. I have my side of the guest list done (40-50 people), but I'm expecting my fiancee's family to come up with double that. Beyond that, I have no idea how to plan a budget because I don't know how much things tend to cost. It seems like we have a classic chicken/egg problem here: we probably need to finalize the guest list before we do anything, then narrow down a date, then choose a venue, then figure out a budget? Also, I've read through this entire thread over the last few months, but if anyone posted any good wedding ideas or recommendations for Orlando (Florida), would you mind sharing them again? We registered on The Knot, but we could use all the help we can get.
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Nov 11, 2008 16:14
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Big Bad Voodoo Lou posted:Hey hey. I'm starting to plan a wedding for late October 2009 in Orlando, but it is just so overwhelming and intimidating. I have my side of the guest list done (40-50 people), but I'm expecting my fiancee's family to come up with double that. Beyond that, I have no idea how to plan a budget because I don't know how much things tend to cost. It seems like we have a classic chicken/egg problem here: we probably need to finalize the guest list before we do anything, then narrow down a date, then choose a venue, then figure out a budget? Hey, congrats! That's when we wanted to get married, but my younger sister had already laid claim to the month (she got engaged about a year before we did & decided to be a jerk and not get married for 2 years, how dare she!) and we're poor anyway, so we're waiting 'till that following spring. We really let our budget determine the guest list, date, & venue. Although we have yet to book anything, we figured out how much we could feasibly save up for the wedding each month, factoring in when my fiance'll pay off his car and having that money going into the wedding. Then we figured a ballpark time when we'd want it and started looking at venues. Once we got more of an idea what everything would cost, we picked a more specific date based on how much we'd have saved and what we would want to do. So really, all the things sorta come together at the same time. I'd say first thing to do would be to try and figure out where your budget is coming from and take it from there.
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Nov 11, 2008 17:42
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Rockwell posted:Just poking in on here to ask something. My fiancee and I are having an interracial wedding in Canada and her parents expects us to invite well over 100 people to the wedding from the Philippines. Hey Canadian marrying a Filipina buddy! In terms of tradition yes the Grooms family is supposed to pay for everything, however in terms of north american tradition the brides' family is supposed to pay for everything. AKA Culture clash. The way my fiancee and I did it: We're paying for our close friends and family. That's it. Then we told our respective family members "The cost, Per Person, is $100 for the dinner. Here's our current guest list. If you would like to invite anyone extra above and beyond this list then as a gift to us we expect you to pay for them". This counts for both out parents because my mom is french canadian so HUGE family there. The way we explain it is we showed both parents the full expense breakdown and how much adding 10 extra people would cost us (including gratuities etc). And then explain to them that that extra money will be taking away funds from our house down payment and the longer we wait to get a house the longer we wait to have children because we can't afford them if we go bankrupt throwing a party.
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Nov 11, 2008 18:16
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Just bought my veil off of etsy: Got it in ivory
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Nov 11, 2008 18:46
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I guess I'm engaged now. I walked into a jewelry store with my  I'm not disappointed with the decision in the least, but I think I'm still a little in shock.We're not going to even attempt wedding planning until after we move (which will be some time next year), but I was wondering how people typically handle the logistics of a wedding where the friends and family of the bride and groom are from different parts of the country? No matter where we decide to hold the wedding, about half of the people invited are going to have to travel. I'm not looking forward to that part of the planning stages. 
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Nov 11, 2008 18:58
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Big Bad Voodoo Lou: Research, research, research. I spent most of the first two months I was engaged on the computer every night trying to find prices/venues/colors and the other assorted BS you have to decide. The Knot is a good place to start - but also check out their message boards to get reviews on vendors. (Tread lightly - some of those girls are crazy!) I also went to a Bridal Show to get the feel on what was available in my area and the range of costs. Even if you don't live in the Orlando area you might be able to go to a local one to get a sense of the options available to you so when you are looking for vendors in Orlando, you know what you are looking for. Most vendors don't need an exact head count but if you say "I'm thinking between 100 and 125 people" they can still give you a pretty solid quote. brc64: Congrats! Absolutely none of my family lives in Michigan where I got married. We chose near where my in-laws live so it would be close to at least one side of the family. Our venue was a hotel/conference center so we held the reception in the same place where everyone could stay. That seemed to work really well and there was no one getting lost in a city they weren't familiar with and people could drink and not have to drive home. Even if you don't go the route I did, a lot of hotels will allow you to block a group of rooms to hold for out of town guests. In addition, I set up a wedding web page with lodging info, maps, and reservation numbers so the information was readily available and not likely to get lost. CK: Did you get your other dress yet?
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Nov 11, 2008 19:32
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Optimus_Rhyme posted:Hey Canadian marrying a Filipina buddy! Hey! Yeah, we're doing the same thing as well if the invitation idea isn't such a hot idea and the consensus seems to be that it's a major dick move that will just too much grief for my fiancee. I personally don't care if I look like a major dick, I thrive on this like it's my energy source.  The reason why I'm inclined to call BS on this is because they're willing to do it by their culture with their two daughters but will forego it with their two sons, giving the parents the best of both worlds and protection against their wallet. However, Optimus_Rhyme posted:The way we explain it is we showed both parents the full expense breakdown and how much adding 10 extra people would cost us (including gratuities etc). And then explain to them that that extra money will be taking away funds from our house down payment and the longer we wait to get a house the longer we wait to have children because we can't afford them if we go bankrupt throwing a party. I'll do that to get our point across and I know they'll care about those last two points enough to change their tunes on the # of guests and/or help contribute. Since you're marrying a filipina and dealing with a culture clash, how do you work with your side of the family? How do you work with your side of the family? What's the best way to help explain some points of the traditions to either side? I want to minimize the amount of grief from both sides, if any.
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Nov 11, 2008 19:41
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Gravitee posted:CK: Did you get your other dress yet? Not yet! They've been really good about checking with me on each step, so that's encouraging! Big Bad Voodoo Lou I felt the exact same way, but you will be surprised how quickly things fall into place once you just pick a piece and nail it down. Call her family up to see if your estimate is about right, then start calling venues to see what they have available and when. I would get a budget estimate at least floating around (see how much/if the parents are going to help) pretty soon, because that can help you eliminate places and not waste your time on them. brc64 Congrats! and Surprise! I guess
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Nov 11, 2008 19:52
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Gravitee posted:brc64: Congrats! Absolutely none of my family lives in Michigan where I got married. We chose near where my in-laws live so it would be close to at least one side of the family. Our venue was a hotel/conference center so we held the reception in the same place where everyone could stay. That seemed to work really well and there was no one getting lost in a city they weren't familiar with and people could drink and not have to drive home. Even if you don't go the route I did, a lot of hotels will allow you to block a group of rooms to hold for out of town guests. In addition, I set up a wedding web page with lodging info, maps, and reservation numbers so the information was readily available and not likely to get lost. CalamityKate posted:brc64 Congrats! and Surprise! I guess We pick it up tonight. I'll probably post pictures tomorrow!
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Nov 11, 2008 20:48
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Rockwell posted:Hey! Yeah, we're doing the same thing as well if the invitation idea isn't such a hot idea and the consensus seems to be that it's a major dick move that will just too much grief for my fiancee. I personally don't care if I look like a major dick, I thrive on this like it's my energy source. Rockwell posted:However, Well its sorta US against THEM. We're throwing the wedding without anyone's help. That way there really isn't a clash of the culture thing going on, we had to cut it down to 40 people to make it affordable to us, but like I said we're inviting close friends and family only. If our parents want to invite anyone outside of our guest list then they should pay for it. I mean, if I had a close friend who told me I need to invite 10 extra people or his family will be offended I would laugh in his face. On the same token at $100 a person you're looking at ~$1250 (with gratuities) just so they can eat some food for one night. If her (or your) parents really want them there that badly then they shouldn't have a problem paying for it. If they do then point them out to my previous post about how being poor so their friends can have a party in this economy doesn't really make sense . Also, if her parent do raise a stink just ask them how'd they feel if you told them you were inviting 10 strangers to their birthday party. In Philippino culture the birthday boy/girl are the ones who are supposed to pay for everyone else's good times. Optimus_Rhyme fucked around with this message at 21:27 on Nov 11, 2008 |
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Nov 11, 2008 21:24
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I'm a California girl engaged to a Japanese guy. We're having the wedding in Hawaii next May. Of course we're sending invitations to every aunt and uncle, but not cousins. Everyone loves HAWAII but we're only expecting a dozen people. Even if you send invitations to everyone in the Philipines, don't mention covering their airfare. Give them the day and location, if they want to come they'll make their own arrangements. It's pretty outrageous if you think 100 relatives have the time and money to come. Sending out invitations 2 weeks before is awful. We're sending ours out soon (November) for a May wedding. Vacation days are strict in Japan so they need lots of advance warning, and my US relatives might be planning another trip to Hawaii.
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Nov 12, 2008 00:12
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peanut posted:Everyone loves HAWAII but we're only expecting a dozen people. I obviously dont know your family/situation, but I'm doing a Pennsylvania ---> Vegas wedding and we were really surprised at the number of people who are coming. We expected our parents and 3 or 4 friends. My boss decided to come out, along with a co-worker I'm on friendly terms with, our 10 closest friends, some other so-so friends, my aunts from Boston. The list keeps growing. People seem to use it as an excuse to get a vacation. I havent even sent out invites yet (mom is coming to help me finish them this weekend). I expect the number to grow. One of the things we did was pull a ton of airfare quotes, hotel prices with and without the discount our guests get. Once people realized they could do it for less than 1000 a person they were all gung ho. Southwest probably poo poo two days ago when the majority of us booked our tickets. Also almost all major airlines have a group discount for groups of 10 or more -- only 10 or so down, with the balance due 6 - 10 weeks before.
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Nov 12, 2008 01:15
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Optimus_Rhyme posted:This is a battle you won't win and I see it ending badly. Agreed. That's why I'm keeping my mouth shut on this instance because I know I just won't win. When I was talking about culture clashes, I'm talking about the traditions about certain filipino weddings, such as the Pin The Money (iirc) where the males on the groom's side dances with the bride and bride's females with the groom where they pin the money onto the bride/groom. I know that my side won't be familiar with this, how would you propose help educate this because the last thing I want to do is have my side feel left out in the whole thing or feel put off by it. I know there's a few more traditions but I can't remember them all at the moment. Again, I appreciate your input into this because it's difficult to find someone who's Canadian and marrying with a filipino while dealing with the culture and such.
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Nov 12, 2008 02:55
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Is there a good site to print invitations? I'll probably try my hand at designing something myself, but I'd like it to be printed professionally or embossed or something. The fiancee and I went and looked at a place to host the reception tonight, it was really nice.
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Nov 12, 2008 05:20
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Rockwell posted:Agreed. That's why I'm keeping my mouth shut on this instance because I know I just won't win. Well, we're not having a super traditional wedding but before we planned on marrying here we were going to do it in the filippines. You're best best best is to gather as much information as possible about the traditions, their history etc and the write it all up for your parents/guests so they know whats going on/can participate. Honestly though its supposed to be a party your guests shouldn't feel left out because the brides family is doing something traditional, they can either watch in enjoyment or participate. Also, you may want to think about karaoke at some point (rehearsal dinner perhaps). This will be a hit with her and your family.
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Nov 12, 2008 13:26
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