Craigslist Fools Gold - SCREENSHOT YOUR ADS - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Craigslist Fools Gold - SCREENSHOT YOUR ADS

sirbeefalot: Aug 24, 2004; Fast Learner.; Fun Shoe

So honestly, what happens with all of these terribly overpriced abominations in the end? Do they often find someone as delusional as themselves to unload on for something near the asking price?

I mean seriously a chopped up 20 year old Fiero for 13k. :psyduck:

# ? Jul 12, 2009 07:01

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# ? May 14, 2024 08:31

Rainer: Nov 10, 2006; by T. Couchfucker

slidebite posted:

1988 Fiero with a butt ugly "Ferrari" body kit?

Well, to be fair it has an engine swap. I don't know if its the pushrod v6 out of a Camaro(l32), or the DOHC one out of the z24(lq1). I really doubt he's going to get 13k for it though.

# ? Jul 12, 2009 07:09

Ericadia: Oct 31, 2007; Not A Unicorn

sirbeefalot posted:

So honestly, what happens with all of these terribly overpriced abominations in the end? Do they often find someone as delusional as themselves to unload on for something near the asking price?

I mean seriously a chopped up 20 year old Fiero for 13k.

They get stolen or break down, and end up in several different scrap yards, all over the world. That's what I like to believe.

# ? Jul 12, 2009 07:58

Cavepimp: Nov 10, 2006

sirbeefalot posted:

So honestly, what happens with all of these terribly overpriced abominations in the end? Do they often find someone as delusional as themselves to unload on for something near the asking price?

I mean seriously a chopped up 20 year old Fiero for 13k.

Just look around, man. We're surrounded by retards.

# ? Jul 12, 2009 08:30

kuffs: Mar 29, 2007; Projectile Dysfunction

Sten Freak posted:

I'm not sure what's going on here:
85 Vette
96 body
77 engine (from a motor home).

So the ad says.

http://denver.craigslist.org/cto/1265308534.html

Oh and LAMBO DOORS whoomp.

Jesus christ that interior.

Why would you put faux wood paneling in your vette?

# ? Jul 13, 2009 07:57

BDA: Dec 10, 2007; Extremely grim and evil.

Sten Freak posted:

I'm not sure what's going on here:
85 Vette
96 body
77 engine (from a motor home).

So the ad says.

http://denver.craigslist.org/cto/1265308534.html

Oh and LAMBO DOORS whoomp.

Isn't '77 just about the bottom of the barrel as far as horrible smog motors go? Are we supposed to think a '77 engine is a good thing?

# ? Jul 13, 2009 11:53

AnomalousBoners: Dec 22, 2007; by Ozma

comrade sampo posted:

Isn't '77 just about the bottom of the barrel as far as horrible smog motors go?

Yea, pretty much.

EDIT:
Also if wikipedia is to be believed they didn't make the LT-1 in 1977. The "performance" motor of that year was the L82 (350) at 210HP. Chances are it doesn't even have that.

Dumbass owner aside I'd still love to have that car. Maybe not 10 grand love to but its gotta be decently quick regardless.

AnomalousBoners fucked around with this message at 13:44 on Jul 13, 2009

# ? Jul 13, 2009 13:35

slidebite: Nov 6, 2005; Good egg

Rainer posted:

Well, to be fair it has an engine swap. I don't know if its the pushrod v6 out of a Camaro(l32), or the DOHC one out of the z24(lq1). I really doubt he's going to get 13k for it though.

IMHO an untouched 88 would probably be worth more. It would certainly be more desirable... especially with those KMs, Assuming those are even correct.

# ? Jul 13, 2009 14:20

Elephanthead: Sep 11, 2008; Toilet Rascal

Remember mid 80s vettes were marketed to rich old bastards, same as all vettes, I am not sure but I think the fake wood was available stock.

# ? Jul 13, 2009 18:35

Taaaaaaarb!: Nov 17, 2008; Electric Space Famicon

kuffs posted:

Jesus christ that interior.

Why would you put faux wood paneling in your vette?

Speed and class :smug:

# ? Jul 13, 2009 18:50

kuffs: Mar 29, 2007; Projectile Dysfunction

Elephanthead posted:

Remember mid 80s vettes were marketed to rich old bastards, same as all vettes, I am not sure but I think the fake wood was available stock.

Well, he must have swapped the wood in, 'cause this is the pre shot

http://blownvette.webs.com

# ? Jul 13, 2009 20:23

Revvik: Jul 29, 2006; Fun Shoe

Does it have to say Corvette all over the place? tacky.

# ? Jul 13, 2009 20:55

Doctor Zero: Sep 21, 2002; Would you like a jelly baby?
It's been in my pocket through 4 regenerations,
but it's still good.

Revvik posted:

Does it have to say Corvette all over the place? tacky.

What if you forget to be :smug:

while driving or getting in & out? You can't with CORVETTE badging every CORVETTE 5 CORVETTE inches.

# ? Jul 13, 2009 21:09

AkrisD: Sep 2, 2004; olololol '04 newb hurrrrrrr

Revvik posted:

Does it have to say Corvette all over the place? tacky.

Just in case you forgot and thought you were driving a Ferrari. :c00l:

# ? Jul 13, 2009 21:10

Tai-Pan: Feb 10, 2001

What is in that big puffy thing where the glovebox should be? I have ridden in vets that have it, but no owner has ever explained why it is there.

# ? Jul 13, 2009 21:56

lordofthefishes: Mar 30, 2008; 01000111 01010010 01000101 01000101 01010100 01001001 01001110 01000111 01010011 00100000 01000110 01000101 01001100 01001100 01001111 01010111 00100000 01000011 01000001 01001110 01000001 01000100 01001001 01000001 01001110 01010011

Airbag, at a guess

# ? Jul 13, 2009 22:07

Moruitelda: Aug 7, 2005; I'll shut you up with my cock, you son of a bitch!

slidebite posted:

hahaha

Well, you now have to create a free personals ad promising anonymous gay sex directed to his address. Something like "22 yo bottom requires 45+ yo top. Bareback OK but must be clean and must have no strings" ... or something along those lines.

You know you must.

Tried that, but it won't let you post it and hide your e-mail address. I just put a filter on that particular e-mail address for "Porsche" and "930" and "car," and it all stopped.

I'm taking my time on the revenge, it'll be better if he doesn't know why it's happening to him. :v:

# ? Jul 13, 2009 22:10

Elephanthead: Sep 11, 2008; Toilet Rascal

That big thing is called a bread box, there is no air bag there until 94, it is meant to cushion the damage to your passenger when you smash into something. Go GM!

# ? Jul 13, 2009 22:13

You Am I: May 20, 2001; Me @ your poasting

kuffs posted:

Well, he must have swapped the wood in, 'cause this is the pre shot

http://blownvette.webs.com

Did GM still use those evil metal seatbelt connector things in the 80s? Those fuckers were evil in summer, burn your hand on them. 1970s Fords and GM/Hs made me hate putting on the belt.

# ? Jul 13, 2009 23:58

slidebite: Nov 6, 2005; Good egg

Moruitelda posted:

Tried that, but it won't let you post it and hide your e-mail address.

Well, you could always reply to gay sex ads using his address.
:v:

Edit:

quote:

I just put a filter on that particular e-mail address for "Porsche" and "930" and "car," and it all stopped.

WHAT IF SOMEONE EMAILS YOU TO GIVE YOU A FREE PORSCHE 930!!
:derp:

slidebite fucked around with this message at 00:11 on Jul 14, 2009

# ? Jul 14, 2009 00:08

Revvik: Jul 29, 2006; Fun Shoe

http://indianapolis.craigslist.org/cto/1264679334.html

quote:

1983 Volvo 242 $1,200 OBO 2 door 4 speed manual transmission with electronic overdrive Some rust on the rear wheel wells and around the doors Milage is unknown because the odometer stopped working at 113k. Runs and drives good Still has original tool kit Haynes repair manual included Feel free to call me or email through craig's list with any questions or to set up a test drive.

Click here for the full 800x600 image.

Literally the only 2-door I've seen within a sane driving distance from me. I have no idea how the 4-speed manual shifts are to drive, but this is pretty much what I want right now, minus the broken odometer. The color is even appropriately disgusting. I want to gut it, turbo it, and mortify everyone around me with it.

I drove a sedan (with four doors) 240, later generation. Got involved in an almost head-on collision (caught most of it on the passenger corner) my first week of ownership. Crumpled my front end, absolutely ruining it. End result? Bolted the hood down and drove it, problem free, for two years.

P.S.: Not pictured here: the terrific amount of rear wheel well rust.

\/ \/ fixed.

Revvik fucked around with this message at 19:16 on Jul 14, 2009

# ? Jul 14, 2009 09:45

AnomalousBoners: Dec 22, 2007; by Ozma

I think that's still technically a sedan even though its a two door.

# ? Jul 14, 2009 18:43

blugu64: Jul 17, 2006; Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?

quote:

NINJA HAULER: 2005 Nissan Xterra - $10900 (schertz)
Reply to: sale-ut5ph-1257065913@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Date: 2009-07-06, 10:26PM CDT

OK, let me start off by saying this Xterra is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a vehicle to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Nissan would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.

It was never intended to drive to northstar mall so you can pick up that adorable shirt at Abercrombie & Fitch that you had your eye on. It wasn't meant to transport you to yoga class or Bath & Body Works. No, that's what your Prius is for. If that's the kind of car you're looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. I mean it. Just stop.

This car was engineered by 3rd degree ninja super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous nancy boy amenities like navigation systems (real men don't get lost), heated leather seats (a real man doesn't let anything warm his butt), or On Star (real men don't even know what the hell On Star is).

No, this brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a 265 HP engine to outrun the cops. It's got special blood/gore resistant upholstery. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself. The Xterra also has an automatic transmission so if you're being chased by Libyan terrorists, you'll still be able to shoot your machine gun out the window and drive at the same time. It's saved my bacon more than once.

It has room for you and the four hotties you picked up on the way to the gym to blast your pecs and hammer your glutes. There's a tow hitch to pull your 50 caliber anti-Taliban, self cooling machine gun. I also just put in a new windshield to replace the one that got shot out by The Man.
My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $10,900, but I'll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don't walk up and tell me you'll give me $5,000 for it. That's liable to earn you a Burmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. Let's just say you won't be the prettiest guy at the Coldplay concert anymore.

There's only 69,000 miles on this four-wheeled hellcat from Planet Kickass. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.

Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then contact me. I might be out hang-gliding or BASE jumping or just chilling with my ladies, but I'll get back to you. And when I do, we'll talk about a price over a nice glass of Schmidt while we listen to Johnny Cash.

To sweeten the deal a little, I'm throwing in this pair of MC Hammer pants for the man with rippling quads that can't fit into regular pants. Yeah, you heard me. FREE MC Hammer pants.

Rock on.

http://sanantonio.craigslist.org/cto/1257065913.html

Is this a copy paste from an older ad? it seems familiar for some reason.

# ? Jul 14, 2009 20:24

Simkin: May 18, 2007; "He says he's going to be number one!"

Yeah, that's come up a few times in this thread, every time with a different vehichle and slliiiiightly different wording.

# ? Jul 14, 2009 20:30

I_Like_Me: Dec 26, 2004

Sweet

http://chicago.craigslist.org/nch/ctd/1269834434.html

# ? Jul 14, 2009 20:34

Dr Rocksalt: Oct 21, 2004

The Fast and the Fiero-est

# ? Jul 15, 2009 00:19

Taaaaaaarb!: Nov 17, 2008; Electric Space Famicon

shoncook posted:

The Fast and the Fiero-est

Automotive Insanity: The Fast and Fiero-est

# ? Jul 15, 2009 13:26

Elephanthead: Sep 11, 2008; Toilet Rascal

Taaaaaaarb! posted:

Automotive Insanity: The Fast and Fiero-est

Automotive Insanity: The Fast and Fiero-est, Crankwalk Drift

# ? Jul 15, 2009 14:53

Sir Tonk: Apr 18, 2006; Young Orc

blugu64 posted:

Hey man, screw you, Houston smells and is a swamp

It IS a swamp. We wouldn't exist if Galveston hadn't been destroyed by a hurricane 100 years ago.

Trivia: What was the first word spoken on the moon?

Revvik posted:

http://indianapolis.craigslist.org/cto/1264679334.html

Literally the only 2-door I've seen within a sane driving distance from me. I have no idea how the 4-speed manual shifts are to drive, but this is pretty much what I want right now, minus the broken odometer. The color is even appropriately disgusting. I want to gut it, turbo it, and mortify everyone around me with it.

My '89 740 had a broken odometer. Didn't Volvo use plastic gears for them and they pretty much always failed by 100,000 miles or so? This looks awesome and I'd love to get it, good for you if it works out (minus the rust).

# ? Jul 15, 2009 16:06

slidebite: Nov 6, 2005; Good egg

Sir Tonk posted:

Trivia: What was the first word spoken on the moon?

"Contact" as in "Contact Light!"
:eng101:

# ? Jul 15, 2009 16:14

blugu64: Jul 17, 2006; Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?

Sir Tonk posted:

It IS a swamp. We wouldn't exist if Galveston hadn't been destroyed by a hurricane 100 years ago.

Trivia: What was the first word spoken on the moon?

The Dallas Fort Worth Metroplex is larger the New Jersey, has roughly the population of Massachusetts, and our airport is larger then Manhattan. :colbert:

edit: and some how I always end up in Houston for concerts.

# ? Jul 15, 2009 16:46

sirbeefalot: Aug 24, 2004; Fast Learner.; Fun Shoe

I_Like_Me posted:

Sweet

http://chicago.craigslist.org/nch/ctd/1269834434.html

Big Toy Story fan, perhaps?

# ? Jul 15, 2009 16:53

BossTweed: Apr 9, 2001; Doctor Rope

What were they thinking? And why don't they take the stickers off before selling this? I guess the price is decent.

1997 BMW M3 Automatic Sedan - $5300
http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/ctd/1265780580.html

BossTweed fucked around with this message at 17:56 on Jul 15, 2009

# ? Jul 15, 2009 17:51

Charles L. Fuck: Dec 19, 2007; by Ozma

Sir Tonk posted:

My '89 740 had a broken odometer. Didn't Volvo use plastic gears for them and they pretty much always failed by 100,000 miles or so? This looks awesome and I'd love to get it, good for you if it works out (minus the rust).

this is common on many cars that use VDO odometers

fun tip: don't reset the trip odometer while moving

# ? Jul 15, 2009 18:25

BossTweed: Apr 9, 2001; Doctor Rope

Charles L. gently caress posted:

this is common on many cars that use VDO odometers

fun tip: don't reset the trip odometer while moving

Almost every older BMW has a broken odometer.

# ? Jul 15, 2009 19:28

Paul Boz_: Dec 21, 2003; Sin City

Likewise, failing mechanical speedometer cables are the most common problems with mkII mr2s. I've owned two and both had the same issue. mr2oc reports an apeshit volume of these also. cars get old, poo poo breaks. Especially wear items like mechanical speed sensors and what have you.

# ? Jul 15, 2009 19:29

OldSquid: May 28, 2007; Flying a plane is just like riding a bike, except it's harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

BossTweed posted:

What were they thinking? And why don't they take the stickers off before selling this? I guess the price is decent.

1997 BMW M3 Automatic Sedan - $5300
http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/ctd/1265780580.html

I know waffle's been flaky lately. I like photos.cx for image hosting.
not being an rear end, just trying to be helpful
Left out the pics that don't show the stickers you were talking about.
Thumbnailed for obvious reasons.

# ? Jul 15, 2009 21:18

Sir Tonk: Apr 18, 2006; Young Orc

I will say that Dallas/FtWorth/SanAntonio/Austin/ElPaso are all better than any city outside of Texas, so there's that.

slidebite posted:

"Contact" as in "Contact Light!"

That conversation doesn't count since they were just talking to themselves. :colbert:

CONTENT

http://houston.craigslist.org/cto/1271303492.html

# ? Jul 15, 2009 22:46

Speleothing: May 6, 2008; Spare batteries are pretty key.

He spent a shitload on a paintjob for the hood that doesn't match the rest of the body.

At least it was done well.

# ? Jul 16, 2009 01:30

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# ? May 14, 2024 08:31

Tai-Pan: Feb 10, 2001

Cap'n rear end in a top hat wants you to buy his 289 '65 mustang for ONLY $25,000. Restored to "showroom" condition, including such features as a faded and mismatched interior. Filthy loving engine with all kinds of exposed wires running all over the place. Where that $30k went, who knows?
No tire kickers please, don't waste his time.

http://austin.craigslist.org/cto/1237667702.html

Tai-Pan fucked around with this message at 06:51 on Jul 16, 2009

# ? Jul 16, 2009 06:36

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Craigslist Fools Gold - SCREENSHOT YOUR ADS

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