Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Alchenar
Apr 9, 2008

probably drunk posted:

we have plenty of text messages and emails asking him why he wasnt calling the client back, or how odd it was he got 2 flat tires out of nowhere, or whatnot. Unfortunately, it cost us a LOT of time and we had to do a LOT of extra work because of his actions. Is it at all possible to take him to small claims? Not being greedy, he costed us real time and money.

plus letters of recommendation... plus pissing off important clients.

Unless we're talking about a really substantial sum of money and you have the resources to fight and he actually has the money at the end to pay up... no it's virtually never worth it, just walk away.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Wyatt
Jul 7, 2009

NOOOOOOOOOO.

probably drunk posted:

I "hired" on a contractor with no signatures, completely verbal... he completely blows everyone off...

DJ Sizzle posted:

My girlfriend loaned her ex boyfriend $8000 dollars... She unfortunately trusted this guy...

Let both of these stand as examples of why you get it in writing. If you aren't comfortable forcing friends to sign contracts, don't do business deals with your friends.

probably drunk
Dec 25, 2009

by Lowtax
I learned my lesson. It's so true.

hookerbot 5000
Dec 21, 2009
I have a question about family law in the UK (specifically Scotland) and Parental Responsibilty Agreements.

When a couple marry if there are children from a previous relationship the step parent doesn't automatically get parental rights. If the parent wants to confer parental rights on to her new partner and is the sole legal guardian of the child, how complicated is it and can the parental responsibility be removed if the couple seperates? Also does a parental responsibility agreement extend to financial responsibility if the couple does seperate?

I tried googling but it seemed to be all about biological fathers gaining responsibility. The main purpose would be to allow the non biological parent have the ability to sign forms and make decisions for the child if the other is unavailable.

Thanks in advance if anyone can help.

entris
Oct 22, 2008

by Y Kant Ozma Post

Wyatt posted:

Let both of these stand as examples of why you get it in writing. If you aren't comfortable forcing friends to sign contracts, don't do business deals with your friends.

Maybe we should do a new OP and add a set of generally accepted pieces of advice like this. That would require more work though.

Alchenar
Apr 9, 2008

entris posted:

Maybe we should do a new OP and add a set of generally accepted pieces of advice like this. That would require more work though.

It's not like anyone comes to this thread before they've screwed up.

PoOKiE!
Jan 20, 2004

I can has 64 bites now?

Solomon Grundy posted:

I have absolutely no idea what you are asking. You file papers with the clerk of courts, and serve them upon counsel and parties. Did you do that, or something else?

The second part of your question is absolutely incomprehensible.

I'm sorry, I was in a hurry I guess. Should have made it more clear.

I filed in the court and since their office is right across the street, I "served" the papers to the prosecutor the same day. I think it was the 5th, and the court date was the 17th...

It's obvious they got them because I just received their response to them which was dated the day of court and it looked like more researched answers than they could have done after court was done at 3pm. (and of course because I personally delivered them.)

entris
Oct 22, 2008

by Y Kant Ozma Post

PoOKiE! posted:

I'm sorry, I was in a hurry I guess. Should have made it more clear.

I filed in the court and since their office is right across the street, I "served" the papers to the prosecutor the same day. I think it was the 5th, and the court date was the 17th...

It's obvious they got them because I just received their response to them which was dated the day of court and it looked like more researched answers than they could have done after court was done at 3pm. (and of course because I personally delivered them.)

Not sure about your state, but in my state a party to a case is not authorized to serve process. You have to hire a 3rd party process server or get a sheriff's deputy to do it.

So.... if you walked the papers over there yourself, that does not qualify for service in my state.

Biskies
Jan 24, 2004

Instead of wanting to be an astronaut when I grew up, I wanted to play with guns.
I have a question in which the background information is a bit lengthy, but I'll try to summarize most of it here and ask for an opinion:

I started working at the DC office of an AmLaw 100 law firm in May of this year. I am a Legal Assistant for a partner attorney. When I started working there, he found my Facebook account and "friended" me. He kept asking, "are you going to accept?" and really, I felt that I sort of had to (admittedly a mistake on my part). As my Facebook friend, he found a picture of my mother and asked about her motorcycle. He then requested to be HER friend and started asking questions like, "is she single?" and, my favorite (:rolleyes:) "is she cute? Does she look like you?"

I run at lunch and he started running with me. He went outside and ran next to me in short shorts and took his shirt off. He made a comment that people give him weird looks running shirtless while I get smiled at because "people like to see cute girls run outside".

I complained about the inappropriate behavior to some people above me and HR had a conversation with him about the "boundary issues" he was having with his assistant. He turned it into the running joke and things escalated from there. His actions include:

1. He spends a good deal of time on Match.com (a personal match-making account which he has tied to his work email). I wouldn't care about this fact, except that he shows me emails he gets from women on the site and has asked me for advice on how to respond to them.

2. He tried, repeatedly, to get me to get my mother to go for a ride with him. "Tell her I have a Ducati. Women LOVE that about me!"

3. He recants dates that he has with women from Match.com. This includes him making fun of a woman for being "fat", even though he should realize that this could be construed as hurtful and insensitive to someone that had spent many years fat (me).

4. He explained to me that one of his female friends on Match.com stated to him that she refuses to respond to anyone that indicates in their personal ad that they enjoy erotica. He followed that up by stating that he enjoys erotica ("I even put that in my profile!") and that she could be ruling out great guys like him by stipulating that. This is something that I NEVER would have needed, nor wanted, to know about the attorney that I support.

5. He asked me one day how much weight I'd lost since I started at the firm. I stated that I had lost 20 pounds. He replied that I'd probably lose another 20 here. I asked, "do you realize what I'd look like 20 pounds lighter?" with a facial expression that clearly showed disgust. He responded, "like a babe?".

6. He constantly talks about his ex-girlfriend. He tells me about all the guys she "banged" while they were together. He goes into detail about their sex life and her family and the drama she brought into his life. When I caused him to be frustrated with me one day, he called me by her name. Repeatedly. When I asked him to stop, his response was, "okay, <ex-girlfriend's name>!"

7. He now spends his time talking about his new girlfriend. He told me that she's married and he's friends with the family. He has gone on and on in detail about the conversations they have (all inappropriate, such as when she called him drunk and said things that I care not to repeat at the moment). She calls him at least a dozen times a day. He showed me emails that she had sent to his work email account that stated things, such as how she wanted "sloppy wet kisses" from him. I don't need to see any of this.

8. He left the renewal notice for his Playboy subscription on his desk in plain sight for nearly a week. He then mailed it, admittedly with his own stamp, through the company's mail box (I know this because the receptionist complained to me about it).

There is more than this, but I feel that anything I state moving forward from here is becoming redundant. If I tell him I don't have time to talk about these things with him because I'm busy, he becomes rude and, frankly, downright mean, including snapping at me with, "what's your PROBLEM anyway?"

HR has talked to him once and it merely escalated. I brought this up yet again with my supervisor (who works in an office in a different state). She acknowledged via email in writing that some of these concerns were previously addressed, but they assumed they had gotten better. When I came into the office to meet with her, she assured me that there was an "investigation" going on, but that I would have to continue to work with him because they have nowhere to reassign me.

I was leaving for lunch the other day and he cornered me in the hallway. "Hey. I just want you to know I'm sorry." How does THAT make me feel any less awful at work? Then, to make matters worse, my supervisor in CT talked to me about a dress I've worn on a dozen other occasions without incident stating that, if I was going to wear something with a deep V-neck, I need to wear a sweater "given the current situation". It's like the corporate version of "it's your fault you were raped...look what you're wearing!"

I am not supposed to discuss ANYTHING that is going on with the other people in the office, which has only ostracized me. They have placed two HUGE buckets in the hallway outside his office. One says "IN", the other says "OUT" because I informed them that I don't feel comfortable working or interacting with him. Everyone wants to know what is going on (since it's obvious that something is going on) and yet I can't say anything. So instead, I have to avoid talking to anyone, basically.

I have no idea what to do at this point. They won't tell me how long the "investigation" will go on, but it's been a week and counting at this point. Work is uncomfortable at best and I am on edge in the office, at times shaking and making myself sick with anxiety.

I know this doesn't replace actual legal advice, but do I go file a complaint with the EEOC? I don't understand this "investigation". I'd assume that, if it were going to take a great deal of time, ONE OF US would have been placed on paid administrative leave in an effort to make the work environment pleasant, but yet here I am, working directly for this person indefinitely, as far as I can see.

Any guidance would be helpful. Thanks and sorry this was such a long post.

Leif.
Mar 27, 2005

Son of the Defender
Formerly Diplomaticus/SWATJester

Biskies posted:

I started working at the DC office of an AmLaw 100 law firm in May of this year. I am a Legal Assistant for a partner attorney.

Your answer can be found in this sentence.

tishthedish
Jan 21, 2007

I'm standing at her shores
I got into an accident back on April 30th. Completely other guy's fault. I've been working with the insurance adjuster from his company rather than go through my own insurance company given that I have a $1000 deductible. We settled on an amount for property damage, but we are not agreeing on an amount for medical bills/pain and suffering. Initially the adjuster offered $1750, before I saw the doctor and knew the extent of my injuries. After I was laid up for 3 weeks and accrued $500 in medical bills, the adjuster offered $1000. I did not give in to that, and a couple of months later, she upped it to $1250. I feel like, given the circumstances (I was in school year round and lost my only week of vacation because he hit me right after I took my finals for the spring), $2000 was more fair. I told her that I would take $1500, though, because my medical bills are past due.

Here's the problem: since the email when she offered $1250, which was July 19th, she has not responded to any of my three emails. She works at home and has replied to other emails at any point of the day, so I know that she has seen my emails. I believe that she is using the "stalling" technique, which I even called her out on (of course, she didn't respond). How do I prod her into emailing me back? Also, she said that she can't just give me my money to pay my medical bills (and she knows exactly how much they are since I've sent her copies of the bills) and settle the pain and suffering separately. She said that they had to be settled as one amount, which I feel like is a load of crap.

I'm in Texas, by the way. I just sent in a complaint to the Texas Department of Insurance, but I'm not sure that anything will become of it.

Loopyface
Mar 22, 2003
Call her?
Call the company she works for?
Stop emailing.

PoOKiE!
Jan 20, 2004

I can has 64 bites now?

entris posted:

Not sure about your state, but in my state a party to a case is not authorized to serve process. You have to hire a 3rd party process server or get a sheriff's deputy to do it.

So.... if you walked the papers over there yourself, that does not qualify for service in my state.

I believe that's the case if you have a lawyer in Illinois, but I have been taking care of this on my own up until now. As far as I know I'm not wrong on that because they've accepted everything I've filed previously and haven't brought that issue up before?

Biskies posted:

Things.

All I can say is WOW! That sounds like a plot for a sitcom or something... Good luck though, I hope it gets resolved sometime soon for your sake. It seems like they would have had at least 5 talks with him already based on all that.

Biskies
Jan 24, 2004

Instead of wanting to be an astronaut when I grew up, I wanted to play with guns.

SWATJester posted:

Your answer can be found in this sentence.

I may be stupid, but I don't get this at all. I work for an IP attorney (I work in patent prosecution). I have no idea what answer that was supposed to provide since it's the partner I work for that is causing this issue for me.

PoOKiE! posted:

All I can say is WOW! That sounds like a plot for a sitcom or something... Good luck though, I hope it gets resolved sometime soon for your sake. It seems like they would have had at least 5 talks with him already based on all that.

Yeah, it's fairly incredible. The funny part is that I don't even think he realizes that he's inappropriate. I work directly for him and part of me felt a bit bad, as though he considered me "just one of the guys". However, the biggest issue is that he treats me like total poo poo when I blow him off/make it clear that his conversation is inappropriate and that I don't have time for it. Also, he's just completely and utterly offensive.

Frankly, it's been a week. Many of the points I made to HR involve emails...which he was ignorant enough to tie to his firm email account. You would think that any higher-level IT person could access these emails in the span of an hour or so after I reported it last week. They're dragging their feet and then calling me out on things that are silly (i.e. my wardrobe). I feel as though they're forcing me to work with him and making my life hell until I eventually go so nuts that I quit on my own. However, I can't do that. I need my paycheck and health insurance. :( Also, there aren't many IP assistant positions being advertised for at the moment and most definitely none in my salary range. I'm going to take a hit either way. This whole situation sucks.

Biskies fucked around with this message at 04:48 on Aug 21, 2010

Leif.
Mar 27, 2005

Son of the Defender
Formerly Diplomaticus/SWATJester

quote:

The funny part is that I don't even think he realizes that he's inappropriate.

He's a partner in an AmLaw 100 firm, of course he doesn't know it's inappropriate. That's what I was saying.


Basically it comes down to two things. 1) they fire the partner (not gonna happen). 2) They fire you (or do nothing and you quit), you sue for wrongful termination, retaliation, HWE sexual harassment, whatever your jurisdiction has, and make a lot of money.

-e- I'd start looking for a new job now. Just sayin.

Loopyface
Mar 22, 2003

Biskies posted:

I may be stupid, but I don't get this at all. I work for an IP attorney (I work in patent prosecution). I have no idea what answer that was supposed to provide since it's the partner I work for that is causing this issue for me

Right. A partner.

Biskies
Jan 24, 2004

Instead of wanting to be an astronaut when I grew up, I wanted to play with guns.

SWATJester posted:

He's a partner in an AmLaw 100 firm, of course he doesn't know it's inappropriate. That's what I was saying.


Basically it comes down to two things. 1) they fire the partner (not gonna happen). 2) They fire you (or do nothing and you quit), you sue for wrongful termination, retaliation, HWE sexual harassment, whatever your jurisdiction has, and make a lot of money.

-e- I'd start looking for a new job now. Just sayin.

Ah yes, I get it. I guess I am rather dense sometimes.

I have been looking for a new job. There's just not much on the market for IP lately, unless I want to work in Docketing (blah) or Foreign Filing (which I suppose wouldn't be too bad).

Thanks for the advice.

tishthedish
Jan 21, 2007

I'm standing at her shores

Loopyface posted:

Call her?
Call the company she works for?
Stop emailing.

I'm emailing as opposed to calling because she's said things on the phone that she'll later deny she said. At first we were doing snail mail because I tried to email her and she said "our office does not allow communication through email". Oddly enough, after very slowly corresponding for a month, she was allowed to email! Imagine that.

I suppose I could call her and simply ask if she's alive and still works with Traveler's and then hang up. I absolutely refuse to talk about my case over the phone, because she has already tried to con me into signing a paper that would give me only $500 for medical bills and pain and suffering COMBINED. I know that stalling is a technique that adjusters use to get their way, and that's not going to happen.

terrorist ambulance
Nov 5, 2009

Biskies posted:

Ah yes, I get it. I guess I am rather dense sometimes.

I have been looking for a new job. There's just not much on the market for IP lately, unless I want to work in Docketing (blah) or Foreign Filing (which I suppose wouldn't be too bad).

Thanks for the advice.

I have no doubt at all the experiences you described were demeaning and awful, but you're very likely to be coming into an enormous windfall very soon, so there's that.

Leif.
Mar 27, 2005

Son of the Defender
Formerly Diplomaticus/SWATJester

tishthedish posted:

I'm emailing as opposed to calling because she's said things on the phone that she'll later deny she said. At first we were doing snail mail because I tried to email her and she said "our office does not allow communication through email". Oddly enough, after very slowly corresponding for a month, she was allowed to email! Imagine that.

I suppose I could call her and simply ask if she's alive and still works with Traveler's and then hang up. I absolutely refuse to talk about my case over the phone, because she has already tried to con me into signing a paper that would give me only $500 for medical bills and pain and suffering COMBINED. I know that stalling is a technique that adjusters use to get their way, and that's not going to happen.

So send certified mail?

billion dollar bitch
Jul 20, 2005

To drink and fight.
To fuck all night.

Biskies posted:

Any guidance would be helpful. Thanks and sorry this was such a long post.

Can you get me a job with your firm?

Biskies
Jan 24, 2004

Instead of wanting to be an astronaut when I grew up, I wanted to play with guns.

terrorist ambulance posted:

I have no doubt at all the experiences you described were demeaning and awful, but you're very likely to be coming into an enormous windfall very soon, so there's that.

As wonderful as that would be, I doubt it. I'm not even sure how to go about finding representation. The attorney I work for is working from home Monday, so I was planning on walking to the EEOC office to file a complaint. I believe, from what I've been reading, that is the first step.

billion dollar bitch posted:

Can you get me a job with your firm?

I'm not sure HR likes me so much anymore. :(

entris
Oct 22, 2008

by Y Kant Ozma Post

PoOKiE! posted:

I believe that's the case if you have a lawyer in Illinois, but I have been taking care of this on my own up until now. As far as I know I'm not wrong on that because they've accepted everything I've filed previously and haven't brought that issue up before?



Well, the civil procedure rules for Illinois don't allow a party to serve process:

quote:

735 ILCS 5/2-202. Persons authorized to serve process; Place of service; Failure to make return.

(a) Process shall be served by a sheriff, or if the sheriff is disqualified, by a coroner of some county of the State. A sheriff of a county with a population of less than 1,000,000 may employ civilian personnel to serve process. In counties with a population of less than 1,000,000, process may be served, without special appointment, by a person who is licensed or registered as a private detective under the Private Detective, Private Alarm, Private Security, Fingerprint Vendor, and Locksmith Act of 2004 [FN1] or by a registered employee of a private detective agency certified under that Act. A private detective or licensed employee must supply the sheriff of any county in which he serves process with a copy of his license or certificate; however, the failure of a person to supply the copy shall not in any way impair the validity of process served by the person. The court may, in its discretion upon motion, order service to be made by a private person over 18 years of age and not a party to the action. It is not necessary that service be made by a sheriff or coroner of the county in which service is made. If served or sought to be served by a sheriff or coroner, he or she shall endorse his or her return thereon, and if by a private person the return shall be by affidavit.

(a-5) Upon motion and in its discretion, the court may appoint as a special process server a private detective agency certified under the Private Detective, Private Alarm, Private Security, Fingerprint Vendor, and Locksmith Act of 2004. Under the appointment, any employee of the private detective agency who is registered under that Act may serve the process. The motion and the order of appointment must contain the number of the certificate issued to the private detective agency by the Department of Professional Regulation under the Private Detective, Private Alarm, Private Security, Fingerprint Vendor, and Locksmith Act of 2004.

(b) Summons may be served upon the defendants wherever they may be found in the State, by any person authorized to serve process. An officer may serve summons in his or her official capacity outside his or her county, but fees for mileage outside the county of the officer cannot be taxed as costs. The person serving the process in a foreign county may make return by mail.

(c) If any sheriff, coroner, or other person to whom any process is delivered, neglects or refuses to make return of the same, the plaintiff may petition the court to enter a rule requiring the sheriff, coroner, or other person, to make return of the process on a day to be fixed by the court, or to show cause on that day why that person should not be attached for contempt of the court. The plaintiff shall then cause a written notice of the rule to be served on the sheriff, coroner, or other person. If good and sufficient cause be not shown to excuse the officer or other person, the court shall adjudge him or her guilty of a contempt, and shall impose punishment as in other cases of contempt.

(d) If process is served by a sheriff or coroner, the court may tax the fee of the sheriff or coroner as costs in the proceeding. If process is served by a private person or entity, the court may establish a fee therefor and tax such fee as costs in the proceedings.

(e) In addition to the powers stated in Section 8.1a of the Housing Authorities Act, [FN2] in counties with a population of 3,000,000 or more inhabitants, members of a housing authority police force may serve process for forcible entry and detainer actions commenced by that housing authority and may execute orders of possession for that housing authority.

(f) In counties with a population of 3,000,000 or more, process may be served, with special appointment by the court, by a private process server or a law enforcement agency other than the county sheriff in proceedings instituted under the Forcible Entry and Detainer Article of this Code as a result of a lessor or lessor's assignee declaring a lease void pursuant to Section 11 of the Controlled Substance and Cannabis Nuisance Act. [FN3]

But your issue is quasi-criminal, if I remember correctly, so this may not be relevant. Although, admittedly, I still think you can't serve process personally.

Phil Moscowitz
Feb 19, 2007

If blood be the price of admiralty,
Lord God, we ha' paid in full!

Biskies posted:

I have a question in which the background information is a bit lengthy, but I'll try to summarize most of it here and ask for an opinion:

I started working at the DC office of an AmLaw 100 law firm in May of this year. I am a Legal Assistant for a partner attorney. When I started working there, he found my Facebook account and "friended" me. He kept asking, "are you going to accept?" and really, I felt that I sort of had to (admittedly a mistake on my part). As my Facebook friend, he found a picture of my mother and asked about her motorcycle. He then requested to be HER friend and started asking questions like, "is she single?" and, my favorite (:rolleyes:) "is she cute? Does she look like you?"

I run at lunch and he started running with me. He went outside and ran next to me in short shorts and took his shirt off. He made a comment that people give him weird looks running shirtless while I get smiled at because "people like to see cute girls run outside".

I complained about the inappropriate behavior to some people above me and HR had a conversation with him about the "boundary issues" he was having with his assistant. He turned it into the running joke and things escalated from there. His actions include:

1. He spends a good deal of time on Match.com (a personal match-making account which he has tied to his work email). I wouldn't care about this fact, except that he shows me emails he gets from women on the site and has asked me for advice on how to respond to them.

2. He tried, repeatedly, to get me to get my mother to go for a ride with him. "Tell her I have a Ducati. Women LOVE that about me!"

3. He recants dates that he has with women from Match.com. This includes him making fun of a woman for being "fat", even though he should realize that this could be construed as hurtful and insensitive to someone that had spent many years fat (me).

4. He explained to me that one of his female friends on Match.com stated to him that she refuses to respond to anyone that indicates in their personal ad that they enjoy erotica. He followed that up by stating that he enjoys erotica ("I even put that in my profile!") and that she could be ruling out great guys like him by stipulating that. This is something that I NEVER would have needed, nor wanted, to know about the attorney that I support.

5. He asked me one day how much weight I'd lost since I started at the firm. I stated that I had lost 20 pounds. He replied that I'd probably lose another 20 here. I asked, "do you realize what I'd look like 20 pounds lighter?" with a facial expression that clearly showed disgust. He responded, "like a babe?".

6. He constantly talks about his ex-girlfriend. He tells me about all the guys she "banged" while they were together. He goes into detail about their sex life and her family and the drama she brought into his life. When I caused him to be frustrated with me one day, he called me by her name. Repeatedly. When I asked him to stop, his response was, "okay, <ex-girlfriend's name>!"

7. He now spends his time talking about his new girlfriend. He told me that she's married and he's friends with the family. He has gone on and on in detail about the conversations they have (all inappropriate, such as when she called him drunk and said things that I care not to repeat at the moment). She calls him at least a dozen times a day. He showed me emails that she had sent to his work email account that stated things, such as how she wanted "sloppy wet kisses" from him. I don't need to see any of this.

8. He left the renewal notice for his Playboy subscription on his desk in plain sight for nearly a week. He then mailed it, admittedly with his own stamp, through the company's mail box (I know this because the receptionist complained to me about it).

There is more than this, but I feel that anything I state moving forward from here is becoming redundant. If I tell him I don't have time to talk about these things with him because I'm busy, he becomes rude and, frankly, downright mean, including snapping at me with, "what's your PROBLEM anyway?"

HR has talked to him once and it merely escalated. I brought this up yet again with my supervisor (who works in an office in a different state). She acknowledged via email in writing that some of these concerns were previously addressed, but they assumed they had gotten better. When I came into the office to meet with her, she assured me that there was an "investigation" going on, but that I would have to continue to work with him because they have nowhere to reassign me.

I was leaving for lunch the other day and he cornered me in the hallway. "Hey. I just want you to know I'm sorry." How does THAT make me feel any less awful at work? Then, to make matters worse, my supervisor in CT talked to me about a dress I've worn on a dozen other occasions without incident stating that, if I was going to wear something with a deep V-neck, I need to wear a sweater "given the current situation". It's like the corporate version of "it's your fault you were raped...look what you're wearing!"

I am not supposed to discuss ANYTHING that is going on with the other people in the office, which has only ostracized me. They have placed two HUGE buckets in the hallway outside his office. One says "IN", the other says "OUT" because I informed them that I don't feel comfortable working or interacting with him. Everyone wants to know what is going on (since it's obvious that something is going on) and yet I can't say anything. So instead, I have to avoid talking to anyone, basically.

I have no idea what to do at this point. They won't tell me how long the "investigation" will go on, but it's been a week and counting at this point. Work is uncomfortable at best and I am on edge in the office, at times shaking and making myself sick with anxiety.

I know this doesn't replace actual legal advice, but do I go file a complaint with the EEOC? I don't understand this "investigation". I'd assume that, if it were going to take a great deal of time, ONE OF US would have been placed on paid administrative leave in an effort to make the work environment pleasant, but yet here I am, working directly for this person indefinitely, as far as I can see.

Any guidance would be helpful. Thanks and sorry this was such a long post.

I didn't realize Michael Scott was a lawyer

visuvius
Sep 24, 2007
sta da moor
If someone could please tell me the easiest, most painless route I can take for divorce, please let me know. Here are my details:

- I'm in California
- Married under 3 years
- No kids, no house, no shared bank account
- I have about $7k of her bills (medical and school) in my name

We don't really have property aside from the general furniture and stuff. I bought a used car while I was with her. The car she drives is also in my name. What would the general process be for me? Can I do this myself? How much would an attorney cost for this? I'd really appreciate any advice.

dvgrhl
Sep 30, 2004

Do you think you are dealing with a 4-year-old child to whom you can give some walnuts and chocolates and get gold from him?
Soiled Meat

visuvius posted:

If someone could please tell me the easiest, most painless route I can take for divorce, please let me know. Here are my details:

- I'm in California
- Married under 3 years
- No kids, no house, no shared bank account
- I have about $7k of her bills (medical and school) in my name

We don't really have property aside from the general furniture and stuff. I bought a used car while I was with her. The car she drives is also in my name. What would the general process be for me? Can I do this myself? How much would an attorney cost for this? I'd really appreciate any advice.

You probably need to say whether this is this an amicable situation or not? Are you both in agreement with how the property and debt should be split up?

Even if you meet the requirements to do this on your own, you're going to be better off getting an attorney so that you can avoid something you didn't think about/know about coming back to bite you in the rear end later on. Cost will range, but for purely anecdotal evidence my friend's divorce attorney cost him a few thousand.

visuvius
Sep 24, 2007
sta da moor

dvgrhl posted:

You probably need to say whether this is this an amicable situation or not? Are you both in agreement with how the property and debt should be split up?

Even if you meet the requirements to do this on your own, you're going to be better off getting an attorney so that you can avoid something you didn't think about/know about coming back to bite you in the rear end later on. Cost will range, but for purely anecdotal evidence my friend's divorce attorney cost him a few thousand.

Well the debt thing is something I had a question about. How does that work. That $7k of her debt that is in my name, am I ultimately stuck with that? What happens in situations like that? I will be contacting her about splitting stuff up but I have a strong feeling she will be very difficult.

quepasa18
Oct 13, 2005

visuvius posted:

Well the debt thing is something I had a question about. How does that work. That $7k of her debt that is in my name, am I ultimately stuck with that? What happens in situations like that? I will be contacting her about splitting stuff up but I have a strong feeling she will be very difficult.

You live in CA, which is a community property state. Therefore, assuming the debt that's in your name was taken on during the marriage, you both owe the debt jointly and severally (basically meaning you're both responsible for the entire amount). So you'll have to determine how to divide it in the divorce. You might each be responsible for half, or one of you might take the entire debt and therefore keep an equivalent amount in asset value to offset it.

PoOKiE!
Jan 20, 2004

I can has 64 bites now?

entris posted:

Well, the civil procedure rules for Illinois don't allow a party to serve process:


But your issue is quasi-criminal, if I remember correctly, so this may not be relevant. Although, admittedly, I still think you can't serve process personally.

Thanks for that. It seems that is probably accurate. I think I found the "how" of serving papers and failed to check on "who" could serve because I figured since I wasn't represented that I would be included. It seems that sending certified mail is a valid way though, so I'll just do that next time.

I did get a response from the prosecutors in the mail but it wasn't certified mail, so I'm not sure what sort of guidelines they're following either.

terrorist ambulance
Nov 5, 2009

PoOKiE! posted:

Thanks for that. It seems that is probably accurate. I think I found the "how" of serving papers and failed to check on "who" could serve because I figured since I wasn't represented that I would be included. It seems that sending certified mail is a valid way though, so I'll just do that next time.

I did get a response from the prosecutors in the mail but it wasn't certified mail, so I'm not sure what sort of guidelines they're following either.

So when you're confronted with the reality that you can't even do basic procedural stuff properly does it make you rethink your windmill tilting or is part of your pathology the ability to double down regardless

Lammy!
Jul 3, 2004

WHAT TIME IS IT!?
Figured this is the best place for my (potential) forthcoming legal hassles! I'm in Miami, Florida and just got a 30 day notice to vacate the premises at my condo from my landlord. It's been a pretty big clusterfuck (not the least of which being there's a foreclosure suit against my landlord), but the gist of how this went down was such:

My condo has an HOA. To get into my condo (not get into my actual unit) they have one of those FOB keys/clickers that will open up the parking garage as well as buzz you into the main entrance of the building / let you call the elevator from the ground floor.

Every so often I'd come home to find my FOB deactivated, and the HOA stating it's because they hadn't received updated paperwork from my landlord. First couple of times I'd grunt and bear it, call up my landlord, and have him send the HOA whatever they needed. On Thursday the 12th I got a forewarning from the HOA saying that they needed updated paperwork from the landlord, and that the FOB would be deactivated in 5 days if they didn't receive it. I gave my landlord notice and that was that. Cue the following Friday, I get home from work and my FOB is deactivated. At this point the building management was gone for the weekend. I e-mailed my landlord a stern e-mail, essentially just saying 'My FOB has been deactivated - why wasn't this taken care of?'

His response was to tell me I had 30 days to vacate.

Which is all well and good, it was coming sooner or later and the guy's a scumbag.

I guess at this point I'm just wondering if he's done anything I could nail him for. The big thing is in his response e-mail he copied the HOA and specifically said the following:

Shithead landlord posted:

I am giving you 30 days to relocated. After that you will be removed from the approved list of tenants and you will not have authorization to be permitted in the building or the unit.

The above email will be forwarded to the board and castle group corp so that there is no mis communications as to my intentions for the unit _____ and the tenant Lammy!.

__Landlord__

Note: You will not be given 60 days as initially offered and no HOA payments will be paid to Blue until the unit is vacated.

My fear is that since he won't be making payments to the HOA that my access to the building will still be hampered while I search for another unit in the building - does he have any right to do this? My understanding is that landlords cannot impede access to a dwelling while the tenant is still authorized to access it, but technically it wouldn't be him doing it, it would be the HOA.

Lammy! fucked around with this message at 04:01 on Aug 23, 2010

Part of Everything
Feb 1, 2005

He clenched his teeh and walked out of the study
I'm in Ontario, Canada.

A month ago I did some graphic design work for a client who works in a different department in my building. To preface, this woman has been known to be a manipulative person who likes creating drama.

This past week my email was hacked and the offender sent out very offensive racist comments to several of my contacts. I didn't find out until she sent me an email this past Friday, telling me that "one of her staff" had received a "highly culturally offensive, bordering on racist" email from me. She gave me no details as to what it was, or who got it in the first place, but only said she would be out of the office until tomorrow so I can't even find out.

Well, this morning one of my friends who also received this email forwarded to me, and had a hunch someone had gotten into my email. The offending statement was an anti-semitic sentiment ("I wish the holocaust had happened twice"), which I also found very offensive.

I was able to change my password finally, so hopefully this will be the end to the emails. The problem now is that another friend emailed me and told me that this woman has now spread this email to many different people, some of whom I don't even know, telling them I'm racist (I mean why the gently caress would I deliberately destroy my reputation by sending people something like that??). My repuation at work is now smeared because of something I didn't even do, and I don't even know how many people have seen this email. Also, I found out that it was her alone who received the email in her office, not one of her staff. So not only did she lie about who received it, but by her own will she also began spreading it around. :(

I sent her an email explaining what happened and asked her not to circulate this email any more. I haven't received a response.

My question is, with my reputation now tarnished and job possibly in jeopardy, do I have the grounds to sue her for slander?

visuvius
Sep 24, 2007
sta da moor

quepasa18 posted:

You live in CA, which is a community property state. Therefore, assuming the debt that's in your name was taken on during the marriage, you both owe the debt jointly and severally (basically meaning you're both responsible for the entire amount). So you'll have to determine how to divide it in the divorce. You might each be responsible for half, or one of you might take the entire debt and therefore keep an equivalent amount in asset value to offset it.

Thanks so much for this. Follow up question, what is the best way to find an attorney? Just, google it? Do they all charge the same?

Javid
Oct 21, 2004

:jpmf:

visuvius posted:

Thanks so much for this. Follow up question, what is the best way to find an attorney? Just, google it? Do they all charge the same?

the very first post in this very thread posted:

If you have a question that you want to ask in this thread, you should probably ask a lawyer too, so here is a link to a website that has contact information for the lawyer referral services of all fifty states: http://www.statebarassociations.org/lrs.htm Check that website, find your state, call the phone number and tell the person who answers that you want a referral for an attorney.

JudicialRestraints
Oct 26, 2007

Are you a LAWYER? Because I'll have you know I got GOOD GRADES in LAW SCHOOL last semester. Don't even try to argue THE LAW with me.

Part of Everything posted:

I'm in Ontario, Canada.

A month ago I did some graphic design work for a client who works in a different department in my building. To preface, this woman has been known to be a manipulative person who likes creating drama.

This past week my email was hacked and the offender sent out very offensive racist comments to several of my contacts. I didn't find out until she sent me an email this past Friday, telling me that "one of her staff" had received a "highly culturally offensive, bordering on racist" email from me. She gave me no details as to what it was, or who got it in the first place, but only said she would be out of the office until tomorrow so I can't even find out.

Well, this morning one of my friends who also received this email forwarded to me, and had a hunch someone had gotten into my email. The offending statement was an anti-semitic sentiment ("I wish the holocaust had happened twice"), which I also found very offensive.

I was able to change my password finally, so hopefully this will be the end to the emails. The problem now is that another friend emailed me and told me that this woman has now spread this email to many different people, some of whom I don't even know, telling them I'm racist (I mean why the gently caress would I deliberately destroy my reputation by sending people something like that??). My repuation at work is now smeared because of something I didn't even do, and I don't even know how many people have seen this email. Also, I found out that it was her alone who received the email in her office, not one of her staff. So not only did she lie about who received it, but by her own will she also began spreading it around. :(

I sent her an email explaining what happened and asked her not to circulate this email any more. I haven't received a response.

My question is, with my reputation now tarnished and job possibly in jeopardy, do I have the grounds to sue her for slander?

It would be libel and it would be a tough call. Usually implying negative things about someone's career/capabilities does not require you to prove damages (i.e. you lost your job/didn't get another job/missed a raise), but it sounds like the problem is not work related, just in a work environment.

Additionally you'd have to prove that she factually knew that you did not send out the e-mail.

Depending upon your state you may have an invasion of privacy-false light cause of action or maybe even the libel cause of action, but it will be tough and expensive to prove.

E: oh wait CANADA. I'm not sure how canadian law enshrines pesky concepts like freedom of speech but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a lot easier than in America. Talk to one of your own lawyers aboot it.

JudicialRestraints fucked around with this message at 18:47 on Aug 23, 2010

Alchenar
Apr 9, 2008

JudicialRestraints posted:

It would be libel and it would be a tough call. Usually implying negative things about someone's career/capabilities does not require you to prove damages (i.e. you lost your job/didn't get another job/missed a raise), but it sounds like the problem is not work related, just in a work environment.

Additionally you'd have to prove that she factually knew that you did not send out the e-mail.

Depending upon your state you may have an invasion of privacy-false light cause of action or maybe even the libel cause of action, but it will be tough and expensive to prove.

E: oh wait CANADA. I'm not sure how canadian law enshrines pesky concepts like freedom of speech but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a lot easier than in America. Talk to one of your own lawyers aboot it.

It's libel. Unless he actually gets sacked (in which case he would sue for wrongful dismissal anyway) it just isn't going to be worth doing anything.

The answer is; make sure everyone you know knows what happened and stop leaving your computer logged on.

Leif.
Mar 27, 2005

Son of the Defender
Formerly Diplomaticus/SWATJester

Alchenar posted:

It's libel. Unless he actually gets sacked (in which case he would sue for wrongful dismissal anyway) it just isn't going to be worth doing anything.

The answer is; make sure everyone you know knows what happened and stop leaving your computer logged on.

Depends if Canada requires a showing of malice or not. I couldn't imagine the court finding malice in that her mistake was a reasonable one. If it had actually been YOU that sent out the emails, she would have been right in saying you were racist. Unless she willfully knew at the time that she sent out those emails that you didn't do it (which I'm not getting from your statement unless I'm screwing up the timeline) then she lacks the requisite malice for libel.

Incidentally, I'd argue that it's not per-se either because it does not relate to your business or livelihood other than that was the location of the email sending -- all it says is "this guy is racist" not "this guy is racist and that makes him a bad worker" or something like that. Again, unless I'm reading something wrong.

Leif. fucked around with this message at 19:03 on Aug 23, 2010

Alchenar
Apr 9, 2008

SWATJester posted:

Depends if Canada requires a showing of malice or not. I couldn't imagine the court finding malice in that her mistake was a reasonable one. If it had actually been YOU that sent out the emails, she would have been right in saying you were racist. Unless she willfully knew at the time that she sent out those emails that you didn't do it (which I'm not getting from your statement unless I'm screwing up the timeline) then she lacks the requisite malice for libel.

Incidentally, I'd argue that it's not per-se either because it does not relate to your business or livelihood other than that was the location of the email sending -- all it says is "this guy is racist" not "this guy is racist and that makes him a bad worker" or something like that. Again, unless I'm reading something wrong.

I mean that even if he wins it's unlikely the damages would cover the cost of bringing the case. Unless it's a massive libel of someone with a high profile reputation or there's causal financial harm they never do.

Leif.
Mar 27, 2005

Son of the Defender
Formerly Diplomaticus/SWATJester

Alchenar posted:

I mean that even if he wins it's unlikely the damages would cover the cost of bringing the case. Unless it's a massive libel of someone with a high profile reputation or there's causal financial harm they never do.

Well yeah, libel cases are almost never worth it.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Part of Everything
Feb 1, 2005

He clenched his teeh and walked out of the study
Thanks for the info. I did post a notice on my Facebook page that I had been hacked and nasty emails sent on my behalf, so I hope that helps. Anyone who knows me well anyway knows I'd never send anything like that, so at least my reputation precedes me a little.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply