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dishonesty posted:I'm glad you said that. My cousin recently told me she was pregnant again, after she's already got 2 that she can't take care of properly. Seriously. And each one it gets just a little harder to feign happiness. If my cousin gets knocked up once more before my wife does, I think I'm going to start throwing hangers at her or something. New page so more content: have any of you just thought, "gently caress it..just fertilize me doc!" instead of the continued trying and subsequent disappointment when you realize you're not pregnant? I'm weighting this option because, quite frankly, the continuous lack of desired results is getting a little demoralizing. Good_Vs_Evil fucked around with this message at 21:12 on Oct 7, 2010 |
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Oct 7, 2010 21:09
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We just started trying last cycle so I'm not quite there yet with the turkey baster. I'm sure if it took a while I would get there though. And I feel you both on getting pissed that people who can't properly take care of kids seem to get pregnant just looking at a penis. It's not fair. My brother, who has never had a job, is a drug addict, and lives with my parents knocked up his drug addict girlfriend of 4 months. This is her 3rd pregnancy. They're both 23. So many of my friend wound up with one night stand babies. It's just ridiculous. I'm like, "ONCE, honestly? What the gently caress". It's hard to be excited for someone you feel doesn't "deserve" it, when you want it so bad, even if you're being judgmental and not really fair to them for thinking they don't deserve it. Jealousy's a bitch.
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Oct 8, 2010 02:34
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As Good_Vs_Evil said, this month was a no-go. I did Clomid + HCG shot + progesterone and they did a pregnancy test on Wednesday and it was a big ol' negative, so I stopped the progesterone and today I got my period. It's just really hard when everyone seems to be getting pregnant except us. I looked back over all the cycles I've been charting and it has been a year now. I know people try much longer than we have been but I didn't expect it to be so emotionally draining. At the moment, that's what I'm having the most trouble with. I'm so tired of sex having to have a goal; must reach ejaculation or no baby! It's a lot of pressure and takes the spontaneous fun away. Yes, after I ovulate it's all fun and games but my luteal phase lasts between 4 and 9 days usually, which just isn't that long. When we decided to go to the fertility clinic and looked at our options, I figured we'd try the Clomid for a few months or longer, and then try IUI if it didn't work. Now I'm wondering if we should just go with IUI. Maybe it's because I have my period right now and I'm all emotional (my period puts my moodiness on steroids), but I'm just so tired of this whole process. I feel like a failure because I can't seem to accomplish the basic evolutionary purpose of being female and GET PREGNANT. Of course, I wouldn't ever feel like another woman was a failure for having trouble conceiving, but I can't help feeling this way about myself. So, we're trying to figure out if we should just keep trying the Clomid and sex for a few more months or go with the IUI. I feel like I should feel more hopeful since this was only the first cycle trying Clomid, etc. but we're on my 17th cycle trying, which is a lot of hope and disappointment and it's just hard to get my hopes back up right now. Obviously IUI doesn't have some magical 100% success rate, but it's much higher than just Clomid. Thank you to those who read this, since I'm more venting than asking a specific question. Good luck to all of you!
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Oct 8, 2010 23:17
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Ugh, I am so sorry Grayscale. I haven't belonged to the thread long and I'm seriously not an expert or anything. I know its tough to think of anything but sex and babies, I'm going through the same thing right now and I'm only on my first month of active baby-making sex. Just try to relax and have some fun. Some people that I know had a really hard time conceiving and when even fertility drugs didn't seem to help they figured they'd adopt. After not focusing on it and relaxing and having fun again, they got pregnant. The stress of making a baby is ridiculously high, but try to relax and have some fun.
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Oct 8, 2010 23:47
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I have another appointment with a difference facility this month to check their policies and prices for IUI/TDI. It's been over two years since we started trying, and with these bad semen analyses we have given up on this ever happening without serious intervention. (I guess we've known all along, but there was always a wish to have it just happen before we spend a lot on it) If this doctor will let me try a few cycles without drugs then we'll be doing the first cycle in January. The last place we went to wanted to do about a grand's worth of testing on me in addition to putting me on Clomid and charging a rather large amount for the donor sperm (vs other places we've checked), and I think the new place will just let us do some TDI without all the other crap unless it becomes necessary. I don't know, I thought I would be excited to start with actual sperm but I just don't feel anything anymore about all this. Is there something wrong?
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Oct 9, 2010 05:45
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Fertility treatments really really really suck. I'm not quite at the IVF level, but I need some heavy duty interventions to conceive and it sucks the life out you. So no, I don't think its weird that you aren't excited. I want another baby enough to try, but I've already had one failed cycle with some disappointing setbacks, and I'm starting to think that if I don't get pregnant this time, I might just be done. I'm only 28, but the stress of all this really gets me down. The drugs make me crazy, fat, and sick. Plus, I already have one perfect daughter, what more could anyone ask for? I'm not completely decided on quitting or not, but I think that I will take a long break and focus on losing weight and hanging out with Lucy if I don't get pregnant this cycle. Also, I need to bitch about my fertility clinic. I didn't get pregnant last cycle, big deal. People trying naturally usually take 3-6 cycles to get pregnant. Every time I've tried to get pregnant, I've been on Menopur, and I've actually conceived twice with Menopur. I wasn't upset that I didn't get pregnant this time, it just didn't happen and it wasn't anyone's fault. However, my RE decided that she needed to switch my medication up? She had no good reason other than trying to look like she was doing something. So now I'm on Gonal-F and Menopur, but I don't see the need! I haven't been responding well to Gonal-F, so I have to up the dose of both the Gonal-F and the Menopur. I don't understand why they couldn't just leave me on Menopur? Last time I had plenty of mature follicles, I responded well with no need to change my dosage around, I've gotten pregnant twice with just Menopur etc etc. She just wants to look like she's doing something so I don't get mad at her, I can see through her dumb facade and it's really annoying! My husband and I are also considering changing our insurance plan so we can go to a different fertility clinic too. I'm not so sure about this one, they aren't even open on weekends and I can never reach them to leave messages.
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Oct 9, 2010 13:12
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The oval office Pickle posted:And I feel you both on getting pissed that people who can't properly take care of kids seem to get pregnant just looking at a penis. It's not fair. My brother, who has never had a job, is a drug addict, and lives with my parents knocked up his drug addict girlfriend of 4 months. This is her 3rd pregnancy. They're both 23. So many of my friend wound up with one night stand babies. It's just ridiculous. I'm like, "ONCE, honestly? What the gently caress". It's hard to be excited for someone you feel doesn't "deserve" it, when you want it so bad, even if you're being judgmental and not really fair to them for thinking they don't deserve it. Jealousy's a bitch. I've been lurking around this thread for the past three months or so. My husband and I's first try at conceiving was a chemical pregnancy at the beginning of August. Since then it's been no-go. While I know we haven't been trying long at all, I've started to get discouraged; everyone I know is like the people you all have described. It's as though people who are in the worst circumstances get pregnant so easily meanwhile my husband and I are well adjusted, educated, and financially stable. If I see one more set of ultrasound pictures online from former classmates, I think I'll choke someone. Double trouble- My husband is in the Army, and everyone in the Army has at least 435 children while we have 0. TL;DR. What I'm trying to say is I'm glad to see that what I'm feeling is common. 
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Oct 9, 2010 17:40
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Grayscale Rainbow posted:I feel like a failure I totally get that feeling. I got pregnant but made a hosed up baby.
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Oct 9, 2010 17:40
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fishandcandy posted:I totally get that feeling. I got pregnant but made a hosed up baby. Aw hun don't be like that. Plus, you made Mischa and she's all kinds of awesome. Although I do get what you mean. We fell pregnant straight away, super easily, then had an ectopic. Then fell again straight away, then miscarried and the pathology shows there was an abnormality. So I can't make babies right either 
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Oct 10, 2010 01:38
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fishandcandy posted:I totally get that feeling. I got pregnant but made a hosed up baby. My heart is with you. My brother was a full term worst kind of spina bifida baby. My mom didn't know until birth and was shocked. He lived 13 days with nearly as many surgerys as days alive. I feel a kinship with you and hope that you are expecting soon.
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Oct 10, 2010 03:26
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I'm going freaking batty. I have another week until my period is due and it is so irritating not being able to test yet. I'm filled with mixed emotions of "Don't get your hopes up, its only the first month" and fear of not having conceived. What's worse is I question every little, tiny twinge in my abdomen. Freaking nerve racking.
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Oct 10, 2010 21:41
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Bahunter22 posted:I'm going freaking batty. I have another week until my period is due and it is so irritating not being able to test yet. I'm filled with mixed emotions of "Don't get your hopes up, its only the first month" and fear of not having conceived. What's worse is I question every little, tiny twinge in my abdomen. Freaking nerve racking. I was the exact same way last month. I turned out not to be pregnant and I don't even think I ovulated that month as I just went off birth control and ditched the pack mid-cycle. I'm going nuts trying not to test too. I hadn't even though about it until today and I realized my period is due in 10 days and I got the sudden urge to test, even though it would be really unreliable. Luckily, I bought some of those ultra-cheap strips on Amazon so I have 25 to go through when the urge gets overpowering.
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Oct 10, 2010 21:48
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The oval office Pickle posted:I'm going nuts trying not to test too. I hadn't even though about it until today and I realized my period is due in 10 days and I got the sudden urge to test, even though it would be really unreliable. Luckily, I bought some of those ultra-cheap strips on Amazon so I have 25 to go through when the urge gets overpowering. I bought the cheapo test strips from Amazon as well, I didn't know how they would work before I bought them so I only bought the smaller combo pack. Now I'm wishing I had bought more. Maybe I'm alone here, but peeing on a stick is kind of addicting.
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Oct 10, 2010 22:17
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You're totally not alone. Even after I got my positive, I tested on average once a day just to make sure I really and truly was pregnant. I didn't stop doing that until the doctor confirmed it ten days later.
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Oct 10, 2010 22:36
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Started having some twinging pains on one side, which after the last few months I can identify as being ovulation cramps (yay for being in touch with my body!) So I just did a home ovulation test and it was positive - all systems are go! Gonna go get my sex onnnnnnnnn  
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Oct 11, 2010 12:42
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dishonesty posted:Started having some twinging pains on one side, which after the last few months I can identify as being ovulation cramps (yay for being in touch with my body!) Yay! Good luck to you!
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Oct 11, 2010 19:56
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Roxy Rouge posted:My heart is with you. My brother was a full term worst kind of spina bifida baby. My mom didn't know until birth and was shocked. He lived 13 days with nearly as many surgerys as days alive. I feel a kinship with you and hope that you are expecting soon. Thank you.
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Oct 11, 2010 22:16
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Ovulated on day 50 of my cycle. Seeing high temps on my chart gave me hope since I rarely notice a temp hike, but today at 12 days past ovulation my temp dropped and a test came up negative, so I'm expecting my period in the next couple of days (luteal phase so far has always been exactly 14 days). Man, and this past week my boobs were KILLING me more than usual, I was hoping it was a sign of something. Well, onto another long cycle. Actually, a question for anyone else out there with long, irregular cycles: Is there any other way you attempt to figure out ovulation? I never, ever have a ton of cervical fluid so it's hard to track that way, and if I had tested for ovulation using test strips every day this cycle starting on day 10, I would have gone through 40 before I caught a positive. I know they're cheap online, but it just seems...excessive. It's just so frustrating--waiting anxiously for ovulating when I don't even have a ballpark idea of when it'll appear, then waiting to test for pregnancy, and ARGH. I know I'm whiny, but I need to vent right now .
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Oct 11, 2010 23:13
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Banana Cat - I don't know if this is something you'd be interested in, but I've read about women with long cycles taking soy isoflavones to try to ovulate earlier. I guess it's like a natural Clomid. You can check cervical position, too. I can't imagine using opks for 40 days. I've been using them for 7 days and am so frustrated. I have no idea what's going on. I only have one left, so I'm really hoping it's positive. Or that my temp goes up soon. I'm going crazy with all this waiting this month.
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Oct 12, 2010 16:01
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I think this may be the only time in my life where I take feeling like absolutely poo poo and choking down chicken noodle soup while I try not to puke as a good sign.  Trying not to get my hopes up again. I'll probably test Thursday.
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Oct 12, 2010 21:08
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Hi everyone! I spent the past several days reading the entire Pregnancy thread, and then this one. It was cool reading about some of you trying to get pregnant months ago in this thread, succeeding, and then reading about your pregnancies and births (and adorable babies) in the other thread. My husband and I sat down and talked a few days ago and decided to go off birth control. We're at a point in our lives where we have enough money to raise a child (though we aren't rolling in dough), decent health insurance, a very stable and loving relationship, and he has a very stable job. The only down sides are that our apartment is small and crappy and I still have a semester and a half of classes before I do my year of student teaching (I'm going to be an elementary school teacher), but those are things that can be worked around fine. We had planned to wait until I was done with school and then teach for 2 or so years before trying to get pregnant (and then stay home with the baby for a few years), but that would place me at 30 years old. I have PCOS and I'm simply too afraid of potentially squandering 4 years on birth control that we could spend trying to get pregnant with low interventions. We figure once I've taught for a couple of years, if I haven't gotten pregnant yet, we can hopefully jump right into fertility meds since we'll have had about 4 years of not being able to conceive already. So that's our logical approach to why we're trying to get me knocked up right now. Emotionally, I'm absolutely thrilled because I've wanted a baby since I was about 2 years old and my husband is fantastic with children too. On our first date almost 5 years ago, we spent a good deal of time making faces and waving at a 1 year old at the table next to us. We're practically giddy about our decision and are excited and scared about impending parenthood. tl, dr: We decided to get knocked up. We're happy and scared. I'll post some questions specific to PCOS a little later because I've written a shitload already.
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Oct 12, 2010 23:35
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The oval office Pickle posted:I think this may be the only time in my life where I take feeling like absolutely poo poo and choking down chicken noodle soup while I try not to puke as a good sign. Ooooo I hope so! Fingers crossed 
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Oct 13, 2010 00:08
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The oval office Pickle posted:I think this may be the only time in my life where I take feeling like absolutely poo poo and choking down chicken noodle soup while I try not to puke as a good sign. I'm crossing my fingers here too! Lots of sticky baby dust or whatever the hell it is you send over the internet! I'm also trying not to get my hopes up. Some weirdness going on in my neck of the woods but I'm trying to sum it up to everything being psychosomatic. Some nausea, mostly wicked back pain, breast soreness, hip pain, and mood swings. Its been super fun at my house the last week.
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Oct 13, 2010 00:36
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Boo test this morning was negative. My period's not due until the 17th, so we'll see what happens.
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Oct 13, 2010 21:46
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fishandcandy posted:Banana Cat - I don't know if this is something you'd be interested in, but I've read about women with long cycles taking soy isoflavones to try to ovulate earlier. I'll definitely look into that! I think right now I'm going to try Vitex (chasteberry) and see if it has any effect on my cycles like some people say it does, and evening primrose oil for the cervical fluid issue. I think I'm also incredibly frustrated because my husband and I keep getting the run-around from our doctors, probably because we're in our mid-twenties and get told, "Oh, I don't know why you're worrying about this. You're young, you have TONS of time to think about having a baby." To be fair, in our area most people don't even marry until they're in their thirties; at the preschool I work at most parents there are in their late thirties/early forties, so it might be a little weird for our doctors to have a couple in their twenties come in asking about fertility issues. But it's still annoying to be told, "Well, if you try for a year and no baby, come back and see us" and after a year of no baby, "Oh well you're young, don't worry about it because you have time."  Maybe if my menstrual cycles were more regular I'd worry less.
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Oct 13, 2010 23:07
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BananaCat, that's so frustrating- I don't see why they would think your fertility issues are any less important because you're younger. If anything, I'd think they'd want to get your issues ironed out so that maybe you could have more time to plan additional children. Ugh. Also, sorry oval office Pickle Maybe try again in a week? I took a pregnancy test this morning too and it was negative, but that's no shocker since we just got started.I looked into the Vitex and Evening Primrose Oil and they look like good ideas, but I'm a little nervous about what effect they could have on the body. For instance, I read that Evening Primrose Oil thins the blood. Opinions? (edited to add a question) Moosephant fucked around with this message at 23:41 on Oct 13, 2010 |
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Oct 13, 2010 23:36
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Ugh, I think I'm out for this month. Poo.
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Oct 14, 2010 13:58
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Moosephant posted:BananaCat, that's so frustrating- I don't see why they would think your fertility issues are any less important because you're younger. If anything, I'd think they'd want to get your issues ironed out so that maybe you could have more time to plan additional children. Ugh.
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Oct 14, 2010 15:30
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The only major warning against EPO is that people with diabetes shouldn't use it without permission and guidance from a doctor because it can change insulin resistance. I never took it before I was pregnant, but I did take it for the last few weeks of pregnancy. Didn't help me at all for ripening my cervix, sadly. Taking B vitamin complex is also said to help regulate the menstrual cycle. I had been taking it to help with a lack of energy before I got pregnant. My cycle was always on schedule while I was taking it. I had to stop taking it during my pregnancy though. I got really bad insomnia (not from it) and it didn't help. It really does boost your energy.
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Oct 14, 2010 16:03
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Yeah I'm dumb. Lannie is right. Ask your doc.  Good luck to all of you btw.
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Oct 14, 2010 18:06
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Moms Stuffing posted:However, my RE decided that she needed to switch my medication up? She had no good reason other than trying to look like she was doing something. So now I'm on Gonal-F and Menopur, but I don't see the need! I haven't been responding well to Gonal-F, so I have to up the dose of both the Gonal-F and the Menopur. I don't understand why they couldn't just leave me on Menopur? Last time I had plenty of mature follicles, I responded well with no need to change my dosage around, I've gotten pregnant twice with just Menopur etc etc. She just wants to look like she's doing something so I don't get mad at her, I can see through her dumb facade and it's really annoying! Did you not, y'know, ask her why she changed your medications?
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Oct 14, 2010 18:30
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BEHOLD: MY CAPE posted:Did you not, y'know, ask her why she changed your medications? Of course I did. She confirmed that they just like to change things up if you don't conceive, so basically they just want to look like they're doing something. I am puttering along, I'll probably trigger Saturday. OHSS here I come.
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Oct 14, 2010 18:52
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Thank you everyone for your responses. I went back to the fertility clinic on Tuesday. They do an internal ultrasound and blood tests at the beginning of every cycle and I now have a cyst on my left ovary as well as my right. I had one on my right when I first saw them, they put me on a round of birth control pills to get rid of it, but it didn't go away. Since it wasn't causing me to produce extra estrogen (which I guess can happen with cysts and be a problem) they decided I could do a round of Clomid. Did the Clomid, did not get pregnant, and now I have a new cyst. Now the issue is that they need the cysts gone because they can prevent follicle development, even on Clomid (I think the issue now is that since I have a cyst on each ovary, it means neither will develop any follicles, whereas before I still had one that could). So I had the option of another round of birth control pills or a cycle of nothing to see if it would go away on its own. I chose the birth control pills since if the cyst didn't go away with nothing, that would be the next step. So I hope hope hope that at least one of them goes away so next cycle we can try again. I think we'll go for IUI because I want to have higher chances of success if I am prone to getting cysts (since fertility treatments can cause them).Just wanted to give an update. I've got my fingers crossed for all of you!
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Oct 14, 2010 21:59
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Remember when getting your period and finding out you weren't pregnant was cause for relief and possibly celebration? I miss those days. I'm not used to my first words on discovering that it's started being "oh, gently caress." So yeah, I'm out for another month. :pout:
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Oct 16, 2010 06:44
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Sorry for everyone having problems. My husband was a big butthole today. We babysat for my friend. Her 4 month old was an absolute nightmare today because she's had a cold, may possibly be teething, and didn't sleep last night. She screamed pretty much the entire time we had her, with short 20 minute reprieves where she smiled at us and then started to screech again. This was my first time alone with a small child in over a decade, and the first time period for Shawn so needless to say, we were a little clueless as-is. This experience made my husband really grumpy as he had little to no sleep and was stressed to begin with, and he started saying things like "MAN the first year of parenting is going to suck" and just being pessimistic in general. I told him it really hurt my feelings and he made it sound like he didn't want a child period. He said that he definitely still did, but that I needed to stop being "delusional" about it being all sunshine and rainbows. I'm perfectly realistic, thank you very much. I just don't need you to rain all over my parade.
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Oct 16, 2010 06:50
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My husband won't have a serious discussion about our kids until I'm pregnant. As it stands now, he wants to name the kid Hang 'Em High Jack McCoy and no other name will do. That's the level of seriousness I'm talking about. Sorry you guys had such a difficult time today. Babies have good days and bad days, looks like you just caught a bad one.
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Oct 16, 2010 07:02
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Thanks for the advice on the Evening Primrose Oil. I think I'm going to skip it for the time being but I'm looking into starting on some B vitamins and I'm going to buy some grapefruit juice. I may pick up a folic acid supplement too. I've actually been taking a prenatal vitamin for several months now too. Do you guys think it would be worthwhile to take a folic acid supplement too? I'm going to look into it a bit more first. I also bought some Pre Seed lube, the Taking Charge of your Fertility book, and this set of ovulation and pregnancy test strips: http://www.amazon.com/40-Ovulation-10-Detection-Pregnancy/dp/B001FYLNVU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1287209600&sr=8-1 Does anyone here have PCOS? I've read that ovulation predictor kits/strips and charting with a thermometer can be very inaccurate if you have PCOS because of the extra hormones floating around. It seems like a double whammy of poo poo luck- first, fertility problems, then you can't even use the things that could help you conceive. I figure I'll read Taking Charge of Your Fertility anyway and use the ovulation strips so that I can at least get an idea of what's going on in there. Also, Bahunter and oval office Pickle, sorry to hear about your husbands. And I Wish I Was, good luck for this month! How long have you been trying? Grayscale, I hope the cycle with birth control is helpful for you. I'm going to give us a few months to try to conceive, then use the Nuvaring for a month because I've heard that sometimes women are more fertile coming right off birth control and it also gets my periods back on track.
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Oct 16, 2010 07:21
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Eh, he said he would get over it, he was just grouchy tonight. It still bugged me a lot though.  And going off birth control did nothing to make me more fertile. I was on it for many years though, so YMMV. My gynecologist said that it can take 3-6 months to start ovulating again after being on birth control, but you can spontaneously ovulate when coming off it, it just seems unlikely.
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Oct 16, 2010 07:39
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Moosephant posted:Also, Bahunter and oval office Pickle, sorry to hear about your husbands. And I Wish I Was, good luck for this month! How long have you been trying? Grayscale, I hope the cycle with birth control is helpful for you. I'm going to give us a few months to try to conceive, then use the Nuvaring for a month because I've heard that sometimes women are more fertile coming right off birth control and it also gets my periods back on track. Eh, I'm use to it now. He's a good guy so I let him slide with his silliness. As much fun as it is for me to talk about our future kids, I don't expect a serious answer until crunch time.
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Oct 16, 2010 15:46
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Moosephant posted:Also, Bahunter and oval office Pickle, sorry to hear about your husbands. And I Wish I Was, good luck for this month! How long have you been trying? Grayscale, I hope the cycle with birth control is helpful for you. I'm going to give us a few months to try to conceive, then use the Nuvaring for a month because I've heard that sometimes women are more fertile coming right off birth control and it also gets my periods back on track. This is month two, so I'm probably premature in worrying but I am 37 and got pregnant on the first try with my daughter twelve years ago, so I'm totally not used to this "trying" thing. As for the Nuvaring thing, I'm wondering if that's not my problem. I've been on hormonal birth control for about ten years now, but before Meg I was using barrier methods. Ovulation tests haven't shown me ovulating at all the past two months...
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Oct 16, 2010 23:10
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