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I completely understand what you mean. I had someone close and greatly disliked to me get pregnant when we were trying and it was like being stabbed through the heart with a poison tipped knife. The amount of jealousy and anger I felt was INTENSE. I didn't even feel like myself. And then you feel guilty and selfish for hating a person just for falling pregnant. It's a nasty mixture of emotions that I think most women keep to themselves because they don't want to be seen as anything less than happy for their pregnant friend/family. I know I felt totally alone until someone here mentioned being the same way too!
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# ? Oct 24, 2010 14:43 |
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# ? May 14, 2024 11:23 |
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The oval office Pickle posted:It's really hard to watch someone close to you get pregnant at a bad time when you want it so badly and feel it would be fantastic if it happens to you. Even if you're happy for them, it's like a loving dagger to the heart man. And it makes you feel terrible because you don't want to rain on their parade and seem like a jealous oval office. It's a very conflicted bundle of emotions. This to the nth degree. Seriously. I have my fingers, toes, and eyes crossed for you! Maybe ask your husband if he'd want to wait a few weeks to find out if he had something growing inside of him?
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# ? Oct 24, 2010 14:51 |
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oval office Pickle FWIW I had those test strips and they did not detect my pregnancy. I used one and there was no line, a couple days later I used another and it was so faint I thought my mind was playing tricks on me. I went out and got an EPT and got a pretty drat dark line on both those. That was like maybe 3-4 days before I missed my period.
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# ? Oct 24, 2010 15:07 |
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I guess this is the thread to talk about this in. I've started charting my cycles again even though we're not 100% trying (but not preventing) again, but its one of the best ways for me to also track how my thyroid is doing (basal temp and all) I ovulated, and I got my period exactly 14 days afterwards, but I'm seriously having the period from hell! My boob was hurting the day before I got it (never had that pms symptom before) Today is my second day and I'm just bleeding all over the place. I use a luna cup and I put it in, and an hour later I could feel it leak and I thought I must have put it in wrong, so I go check on it, and the entire cup was filled with one large clot I am not having any cramps more than the usual discomfort though. I really it could be a lot of things including a miscarriage. Any ideas? I'm working on losing weight before we officially try to start again.
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# ? Oct 24, 2010 18:48 |
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I'm not any kind of medical professional but I don't think one big clot necessarily means miscarriage. When I had my miscarriage I definitely felt something pass through me when I was using the bathroom one time. On the paperwork they sent home with me when it happened I was told to look out for white or gray matter and bring that in if I noticed it. Also I have had 2 periods where I've noticed big rear end clots. If it's worrying you I'd say to call your gyno and at least ask if you don't want to make an appointment to see them.
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# ? Oct 24, 2010 20:01 |
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Isis Q. Dylan posted:I'm not any kind of medical professional but I don't think one big clot necessarily means miscarriage. When I had my miscarriage I definitely felt something pass through me when I was using the bathroom one time. On the paperwork they sent home with me when it happened I was told to look out for white or gray matter and bring that in if I noticed it. Also I have had 2 periods where I've noticed big rear end clots. If it's worrying you I'd say to call your gyno and at least ask if you don't want to make an appointment to see them. I'm bleeding a lot and I've had more larger clots, but I don't have any cramps. Oddly, other than the massive bleeding, I feel pretty good. I've never bled this much on a period. I leaked on my pants for the first time since I was in middle school and just getting use to dealing with my period. I went through a super plus tampon and a super plus pad in 3 hours. I don't have health insurance right now so I can't go to the doctor unless I think I'm dying.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 00:18 |
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I had the same but with mine I had major cramping. I was actually hunched over and breathing through them at times. It was no fun.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 00:45 |
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The oval office Pickle posted:I'm using these: Yeah, those are the strips I was talking about. My husband was the same way plus he really believes that all pregnancy tests are created equal. We had been trying for quite a while and I still had a digital stashed away. I am crossing my fingers for you and all the other ladies trying.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 01:53 |
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I bought a fancy digital test and it was still negative. This whole conception process is very frustrating.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 04:10 |
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Aw oval office Pickle, I was so hoping you'd get a positive. I bought these tests: http://www.amazon.com/40-Ovulation-10-Detection-Pregnancy/dp/B001FYLNVU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1287994395&sr=8-1 On the little instruction paper for both tests, it says DO NOT FREEZE. I live in Alaska and it was a little below freezing the day the tests were delivered (they were outside for a while), and any other tests I order until about May are guaranteed to be exposed to sub freezing temperatures during shipment/when sitting by the front door. Does anyone know exactly what happens to the tests when they get frozen?
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 09:15 |
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Alterian posted:I don't have health insurance right now so I can't go to the doctor unless I think I'm dying. I promise I'm not trying to be a complete rear end in a top hat but you kind of need a doctor if you're pregnant. I know most states have a "pregnant lady automatically gets insurance" policy, but trying and miscarrying can be hazardous to your health. I'd at least try to look into getting state insurance. Even if you can't get it 100% for free sometimes the monthly charges are way cheaper than trying to get private insurance.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 14:45 |
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Isis Q. Dylan posted:I promise I'm not trying to be a complete rear end in a top hat but you kind of need a doctor if you're pregnant. I know most states have a "pregnant lady automatically gets insurance" policy, but trying and miscarrying can be hazardous to your health. I'd at least try to look into getting state insurance. Even if you can't get it 100% for free sometimes the monthly charges are way cheaper than trying to get private insurance. Stuff in our life is going to be happening soon (hopefully) so my husband and I will have insurance again in a couple of months.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 14:48 |
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Alterian posted:Stuff in our life is going to be happening soon (hopefully) so my husband and I will have insurance again in a couple of months. I've known a few couples who have insurance that won't cover pregnancy if you go into it pregnant so I'd be careful of that (preexisting condition).
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 16:08 |
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I'm not sure how helpful this will be but i was having major bleeding and clot issues and it turned out to be an ovarian cyst - caused by Implanon Good luck!
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 16:34 |
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And right on cue after using an expensive test- my period. drat you Mother Nature and your cruel sense of irony.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 21:35 |
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I'm sorry. I hope next time is your time.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 21:49 |
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I think I'm going to just go back to the sex every other day plan instead of trying to track ovulation since my ovulation is obviously wonky at the moment. Of course my husband was all about that switch in plans.
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 21:57 |
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I'm sorry oval office Pickle....here's to the next round!
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 21:57 |
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I'm so sorry The oval office Pickle I hope you have better luck this cycle!
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 22:41 |
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Thanks ladies. Right back at cha! I'm glad no one here pushes "It'll happen when it happens, just stop stressing!" Yes, we all know that. It really doesn't help to hear it from someone who is already pregnant, has children, or had a surprise pregnancy. I understand they're just trying to help, but it feels a little condescending, ya know? My husband keeps telling me to focus on other things and let it happen that way. He just doesn't like to see me upset. He's also afraid of me becoming a "one track mind, placenta mouth woman". I always swore I wouldn't be, but now I'm afraid of that too!
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 23:07 |
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I agree that it sounds condescending, and doesn't really help the situation! If it makes you feel any better, I don't think you have me beat in obsessiveness while TTC. I ended up hiding from him, the many boxes of ovulation/pregnancy tests and fertility lubes I bought in some shoes boxes because I didn't want to scare him and come across as an insane fertility nutcase (although I'm pretty sure I was at that point in time.)
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# ? Oct 25, 2010 23:25 |
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That sucks, oval office Pickle. Here's crossing my fingers for you and everyone else! Also, LH surge...now. Wonder how long this one will last.
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# ? Oct 26, 2010 00:32 |
So now we begin the search for a donor that resembles my spouse and has a portfolio we both agree on. I have three different recommended banks to chose from! This is the least sexy/fun thing every about preparing for potential pregnancy
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# ? Oct 26, 2010 04:29 |
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I'm sorry Papaya. If you're willing to share, I would be interested to read how this all works out for you and the whole process. You don't often hear of a married couple getting in vitro and a donor, so I'm quite curious. Respectfully so. I hope it all works out for the both of you and you have a happy, healthy child to raise together.
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# ? Oct 26, 2010 04:44 |
Well, random internet is easier to share to than family, since we're keeping this donor situation on the down-low with everyone but our own parents - so yeah I can certainly update as things change. What finally got this ball rolling was finding a fertility center that would LISTEN to me and how I wanted to do things, and this place made the cut. With reasonable fees and a doctor that wouldn't shoo away my desires to skip out on drugs and just try intervention-free IUI, I can safely say I'm smitten. He did suggest getting an HSG prior to doing the inseminations, but he also said that not doing it unless it seemed necessary was okay as well - and later joked that I belonged in their Austin branch since it is more hippie-granola than the San Antonio one. I could've hugged the guy. So where we stand is come cycle day 1 of my first cycle that starts in January (or late December, if close) I will be calling them for an ultrasound appt around cycle day 10 or 11, since I tend to ovulate around 12-14 regularly, and if I've got a good one ready to go they'll trigger it and 36 hrs later do the insemination. We agreed that if we get 3-4 cycles down and have no luck, we'll get the HSG to check things out, and go from there. I'm hoping we won't need to step into IVF but if it goes there, then we'll take it one day at a time. In the meanwhile I've actually set my husband to looking over donors, which for me is easier I mean poo poo, I just want some live sperm to get up in there and get to makin' but letting him pick through donors seems to be a better plan. He's sorting based on a general appearance to himself but also to other things that matter to him - and in the end since he's the one who is more touched by this situation than I am, with him being the sterile one, I want him to be happy with the choices we make in regards to the biological father of our offspring. Also when the kid messes up poo poo later then he can't blame me for picking bad seed ;P While I'm still not really excited about all this, I have noticed my baby fever picking up again to the point where I'm like staring and drooling over other people's kids in public. I can't wait for my brother and his wife to move here in Nov with their 2 yr old son
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# ? Oct 26, 2010 05:31 |
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I just got back from the fertility clinic. They did an internal ultrasound and discovered that the cyst on my left ovary did rupture, hence the bleeding and the cramps, but the right one is still there. I am supposed to continue the birth control pills (I have one more week) and when I get my period I am to call them, as usual. If at that point the cyst is still there they may go in and drain it. Just wanted to give an update. I'm still bleeding. I'm hoping I don't bleed all week then get my period. That would just be annoying.
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# ? Oct 26, 2010 14:51 |
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Whoops, I'm five days late. I just stopped taking birth control at the end of September, so I'm guessing it's probably too early to start testing? I have a very, very mild sense of light cramping/"fullness" in my belly, so I'm thinking I just didn't bleed this time as my body adjusts to not being washed in hormones all the time.
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# ? Oct 26, 2010 16:28 |
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Chicken McNobody posted:Whoops, I'm five days late. I just stopped taking birth control at the end of September, so I'm guessing it's probably too early to start testing? I have a very, very mild sense of light cramping/"fullness" in my belly, so I'm thinking I just didn't bleed this time as my body adjusts to not being washed in hormones all the time. It's not too early. I got pregnant while on antibiotics for a nasty throat infection while still on the pill. I'd been on the pill for years prior. Luckily I was finishing off my last pack as we were going to start trying anyway.
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# ? Oct 26, 2010 16:32 |
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So there's some big news on my front. I was going over my pre-requisites for PA school and realized that I will be able to start a whole year early. Which means if accepted, I can start PA school next October. This is pretty huge. It's a chance to get in there a whole year and a half early, and to graduate with a 100k starting salary earlier. Sadly, this comes with a difficult decision to make. Raising a child with a fairly low-stress job that makes buckets of money is pretty loving appealing. We can buy a house, a large one at that, instead of renting, and I can buy us both nice cushy new cars, all the baby gadgets I could ever want, family vacations, and awesome first-rate daycare, possibly an in-home nanny. So I think I'm going to go back on birth control this month and hold off TTC until I finish PA school. It's not that much longer, only about two and a half years. That's much easier to swallow than 4. So I'm just going to channel all of my energy into PA school acceptance. I'll still hang around here and give you ladies support, but no more conception updates for a while.
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 05:58 |
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Hi, I guess it's time to introduce myself. I've been reading all the pregnancy/parenting threads (for months) and my husband and I decided it's time to start actively trying to conceive. I'm rather nervous, because about 4 years ago we had an "oops" pregnancy which we decided to terminate when we received conformation she had downs after an amnio. She was 21 weeks at that point and the whole thing was pretty traumatic. I'm just crossing my fingers for a healthy baby this time. I'm now 27, childless, and my husband is 35 and starting to feel the push. The poor thing started finally feeling old last year when he got arthritis in his thumb he has to take medicine for every night. I wanted to get all the big stuff out of the way because I'll be quitting my job (I work in a smokey bar) shortly after getting pregnant, so I already bought a carseat, crib set including furniture and bedding, cloth diapers, and a bunch of unisex baby clothes for the first 6 months. I'm not a baby shower kinda gal. Have some books recommended in the other threads too, if you couldn't tell the baby fever hit hard. I swear when I see a baby I drop an egg, it's driving me nuts! I just want to get knocked up already!
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 05:58 |
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The oval office Pickle posted:So there's some big news on my front. I was going over my pre-requisites for PA school and realized that I will be able to start a whole year early. Which means if accepted, I can start PA school next October. This is pretty huge. It's a chance to get in there a whole year and a half early, and to graduate with a 100k starting salary earlier. Congrats! That's a fantastic opportunity for you!
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 06:17 |
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oval office Pickle, that's so cool! I'm sure it's hard to put off trying to get pregnant, but it really sounds like going to school ASAP is the best decision. Also, Pluto, welcome to the thread! I'm really sorry to hear about your daughter. Something like that is my nightmare. I sometimes hear about women just being excited about the 20 week ultrasound so they can find out the sex of the baby, but I know I'll be worrying about health issues. Hopefully you get knocked up quickly and have an uneventful pregnancy and healthy baby!
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 06:38 |
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Thanks, hopefully it was just one of those freak things that don't happen again. I'm still looking forward to this one though, because I finally feel really ready for it. And it's fun to pee on things.
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 07:02 |
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Hi, Pluto. Something like that is my nightmare, too. Wait... I wish it was my nightmare because then it wouldn't be my real life. poo poo, I want to bombard you with questions. Also, I'm out for this month.
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 15:42 |
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I am having the cycle from hell. Why have I been spotting for 4 days?
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 16:51 |
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The oval office Pickle: That sounds like an amazing opportunity! I wish you the best of luck Welcome to the thread, Pluto! I'm so sorry for what you went through with your previous pregnancy. Hopefully you get pregnant soon with a healthy baby!
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# ? Oct 27, 2010 16:58 |
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Ovulation hurt this time around but not nearly as awful or as long as last month which is nice. I think the hubby and I were closer on the timing this time around. I hate that there is only a 25ish% chance even if you do everything right but I'll take it. This 2 week waiting period really stinks. I probably just jinxed myself. /sigh. Welcome, Pluto!
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# ? Oct 28, 2010 00:24 |
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Thank you for the welcome everyone, and fishandcandy you can pm me if you want.
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# ? Oct 28, 2010 05:50 |
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I need to get pregnant soon so I can buy this crib bedding: http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3441488&csm=160732484&csc=1044021&csa=165521240&csu=1044023 It's damned expensive, but I think would be appropriate for a boy or a girl so we could use it for multiple children.
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# ? Oct 28, 2010 10:30 |
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# ? May 14, 2024 11:23 |
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drat my luck. Is there anyone else in the WORLD who would start her period AS SHE WAS PEEING ON THE STICK. $6 wasted plus my husband laughed at me for being freaked out enough to go buy the test in the first place. Oh well, at least I have an extra just lying around now.
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# ? Oct 29, 2010 14:47 |