trevalyan posted:

Also known as the "Saddam Hussein Memorial College of Governing." But this is a fantastic summation.

Elan, it's only very recently that you've become remotely competent. I'm sure you remember (or not) that Luke fought Vader the first time, and Vader handed the kid his own rear end through sheer brute force. Tarquin casually extracted a fairly important bit of information from you without even trying (Vaarsuvius has Conjuration as a barred school), whomped a three person party pretty much by himself, and you think you're going to win?

Good luck, boyo.

Taerkar posted:

Except V has cast spells from Conjuration before. I believe the (Intrusive) Black Tentacles are Conjuration, at the very least.

Shugojin posted:

Yeah, not being able to cast it could mean either barred school or just doesn't happen to have the spell at hand.

seaborgium posted:

We know he can't cast teleportation at all. By now the party would have all chipped in to get him that spell if for no other reason than they need it. One of the strips he brings it up, I think it was during the Paladin's arc that a rules change had moved it from Universal to Conjuration so he lost out on ever learning it.

Taerkar posted:

Except V has cast spells from Conjuration before. I believe the (Intrusive) Black Tentacles are Conjuration, at the very least.

trevalyan posted:

Also known as the "Saddam Hussein Memorial College of Governing." But this is a fantastic summation.

Elan, it's only very recently that you've become remotely competent. I'm sure you remember (or not) that Luke fought Vader the first time, and Vader handed the kid his own rear end through sheer brute force. Tarquin casually extracted a fairly important bit of information from you without even trying (Vaarsuvius has Conjuration as a barred school), whomped a three person party pretty much by himself, and you think you're going to win?

Good luck, boyo.

Calico Noose posted:

It's also entirely possibly that Tarquin is just going to throw the fight in order to preserve the cycle his crew have set up.

CapnAndy posted:

General rule of fiction. Villains are proactive, heroes are reactive.

Interesting thought experiment: What would you do if you ran into a Tarquin in a campaign you were playing in?

ConfusedUs posted:

Thought about it? I ran this like four years ago, here on these very forums over in Traditional Games. The party ended up splitting straight down the middle. I had to make a new thread for the other half of the existing group and bring in a couple new players to fill out both sides.

Then I threw them all into a three-way brawl between themselves and the big bad guy. The game ended when the nihilistic assassin, using the magic MacGuffin, death attacked reality itself during the climactic showdown, having come to the conclusion that no one was right.

It was quite badass, really.

seaborgium posted:

Was that the Mario Brothers game?

Gassire posted:

In fact the Warhammer rpg had an entire sourcebook devoted to an area of land made up of nothing but tin pot dictators that were assassinated and replaced every few months.

My Lovely Horse posted:

Gassire posted:

In fact the Warhammer rpg had an entire sourcebook devoted to an area of land made up of nothing but tin pot dictators that were assassinated and replaced every few months.

trevalyan posted:

Oooh. You're right... but I don't think Elan has any interest in participating in the con now that he's aware how it works, even if he is asked to just perpetuate it. Maybe he'd do it in exchange for breaking Ian Starshine out of prison- but it's entirely possible the Order could do that anyways. Again, though, dramatics.

Should be interesting to see how this plays out. Shojo thought he had all the angles covered as well, but look what happened to him- and Azure City. Think Tarquin knows about that?

crime fighting hog posted:

The Forgotten Realms has an area like this, too, called the Steam Lakes or something like that in south central Faerun.

Calico Noose posted:

It's not a question of does Elan want to be part of it. It's the general populace showing up cheering and waving flags, overjoyed you'd overthrown the dictator and lead them to freedom, then what do you do with them.

CapnAndy posted:

More to the point, what do you do with every other country in the desert, who is going to see a big, fat, tempting target? Because with no Tarquin, they're gonna attack. You planning on finding another gate ever or do you intend to stick around and play King until someone gets lucky and bloodily conquers you? Tarquin's an evil, horrifying son of a bitch. But he's still the best choice.

Zereth posted:

And as such his prestige class probably gives him huge bonuses in this situation.

Pope Guilty posted:

Was I the only one waiting for a Monkey Island quote?

Pope Guilty posted:

Was I the only one waiting for a Monkey Island quote?

navyjack posted:

"Ok...so, I get...what? +2 for rooftop duel, +4 for it being against an evil family member, +1 for recent betrayal...oh, and +2d6 damage per round if there's an ominous thunderstorm...Does Durkon have Control Weather prepared today?"

Ashenai posted:

Oh god so many terrible puns

Cabbit posted:

See, this is just making me want a Xykon/Tarquin showdown more and more.

Tertiary Stresses posted:

Is Tarquin so good that he's actually fending of Elan while dropping puns just for the fun of it? After all, he did disarm Elan in the last panel without any wordplay.

Tertiary Stresses posted:

Is Tarquin so good that he's actually fending of Elan while dropping puns just for the fun of it? After all, he did disarm Elan in the last panel without any wordplay.

Melche posted:

"The etymologies are unrelated" is the most badass fight-ending one liner.

navyjack posted:

That may not be a pun, but "unrelated" is definitely a play on words.

ImpAtom posted:

I think he surprised Elan there. He lowered his sword for a moment and Tarquin used the chance to disarm him, as opposed to actually disarming him through combat.