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Yeah in Winnipeg people will think you're weird if you don't have a social before your wedding. Our original plan was to have a Marvel/superhero themed social around Halloween 2011 with the wedding party dressing up as the Xmen or something. I'm sure not having a superhero themed reception. Most people I've talked to don't really make much money off their social anyway. Certainly not enough to pay for a wedding. It's more of a Manitoba tradition. I think it originated because people here are notoriously cheap. Also you can win some pretty sweet prizes.
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Dec 16, 2010 23:44
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Yeah, it seems like it. Not a fan at all. Plus if family is going to donate poo poo for my social prizes, why dont they just donate the money to a wedding fund instead? Its just weird all around. Plus I dont feel comfortable going around asking businesses for donations for a wedding social when they could be giving their stuff to charities asking instead.
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Dec 17, 2010 03:04
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Caramaline posted:Most people I've talked to don't really make much money off their social anyway. Certainly not enough to pay for a wedding. It's more of a Manitoba tradition. I think it originated because people here are notoriously cheap. Also you can win some pretty sweet prizes. I've known those as either Buck&Doe or Jack&JIll parties (I'm in Ontario), and I had one about a month back. I'm not sure how it is in Manitoba, but mine was basically a fun party with dumb but fun games and lots of drinking. It's all just an excuse to raise money for the wedding, and as tacky as that sounds, without it I wouldn't have been able to afford my wedding since I just lost my job.
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Dec 17, 2010 04:02
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Hello January wedding buddies. We're getting married in 3 weeks and 2 days, and I am going to have a mental meltdown, I'm sure of it. There is so much left to get together, and I'm not even doing a fancy wedding. I was wondering who out there has done or is planning a very short ceremony? And I mean VERY. I wrote a rough draft of a ceremony and had my sister look over it (her husband is our officiant), and she is warning me gently against having a short ceremony. I'm guessing what I have, including his and her vows, is about 10 minutes. Now, this is outdoors, in the afternoon, in January, on a hill where it has a good chance of deciding to snow that day, or be 70 degrees and sunny. I'm aiming for a to-the-point ceremony without religious trappings or most traditional types of things of any sort. I have a single "reading", an excerpt from a story, on the nature of love. I have a little bit of officiant mumbojumbo. I have the vows, the I-Do's. That all seems like enough to me, but I'm really a minimalist at heart. My wonderful fiance... has no input. (Tears out hair.) What do you all think? Any suggestions of ways to lengthen or change or amend the ceremony would be much appreciated. Now I just get to talk my maid of honor out of flowers... among everything else. I didn't even get a bachelorette party out of the deal. (I'm kidding, I didn't expect one anyway.)
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Dec 17, 2010 11:33
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I had a short ceremony. I think everyone was excited to get to chatting and having fun, and nobody really minded.
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Dec 17, 2010 18:07
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Venyia posted:Hello January wedding buddies. Our ceremony was also pretty short. The one thing we did, though, that added a bit more to it was our version of the Rose Ceremony, wherein we gave lilies to our mothers and beers to our fathers. Went over very well! 
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Dec 17, 2010 18:54
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+1 for short ceremonies. Ours will probably clock in at the 15-minute range. It would have been shorter if we didn't have a song in the middle.
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Dec 17, 2010 20:49
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Venyia posted:she is warning me gently against having a short ceremony. Besides, you should be doing what you want anyway.
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Dec 18, 2010 00:48
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Our outdoor ceremony turned out to be ~15 minutes and everyone seemed pretty happy with that, especially since it was in the upper 80's outside. My friend though had a ceremony that last exactly four minutes including the walk up and walk down. Afterward, I don't think anyone was sure it really happened. One thing we did that was really nice was a sand ceremony. It's not the most formal thing, but it was fun! And we got to keep it! I also wanted to to the rose ceremony thing, but I forgot to write it in with everything else going on. If you don't want to add more mushy words, than add a candle, sand, or rose ceremony, have a nice song play during it and take your time. People will like watching it. Just make sure you have enough sand...my brother and his wife only filled the bottle half way...
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Dec 18, 2010 03:29
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Venyia posted:Hello January wedding buddies. Go with what you and your fiance want for a ceremony length. Ours was roughly 15 minutes and it was awesome. No standing for extended amounts of time, the flower girl and ring bearer's attention spans were great and everyone got to party a lot sooner. A lot of it had to do with the fact that we specifically told our officiant that we didn't want to have any prayers in the ceremony since neither of us attend church. He was fine with it but wouldn't agree to the ceremony without a blessing from him, which was fine because he's been a family friend longer than I've been alive. It was a cute little poem thing to the two of us which was super special. It was a win-win for everyone.
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Dec 18, 2010 04:44
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Venyia posted:Hello January wedding buddies. My husband and I had a very short ceremony. To lengthen it we did the aforementioned sand-ceremony and also signed the official marriage certificate up in front of everyone. Two of our attendants were the witnesses and everyone got to see us get actually legally married. It was also nice to not have to hunt down witnesses/minister and rush through it right before the photographer hustled us off for photos.
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Dec 21, 2010 00:35
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Ours was fairly short; we used the Art of Marriage reading and snippet of another thing I found on the web, and the kids (I'm a Stepgoonmom!YAY!) had their own very short vows thingie, and BAM! everyone was teary/eyed/crying and telling us after how cool and to the point our wedding was.
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Dec 21, 2010 04:08
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For married/engaged guys (or girls too, I suppose) ITT: what is the #1 thing to keep in mind whilst proposing?
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Dec 21, 2010 21:18
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I would say to keep in mind the personality of your soon-to-be-fiancee. For example, if she is really shy you probably don't want to do a grandiose public proposal. Some women will love that, others would be mortified.
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Dec 22, 2010 02:36
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So what are the guide lines generally for including parents names on the invitations? More specifically NOT including the parents names on the invitations? is it more common these days, or will it only piss off those families that need to have the names in the certain order and read such a specific way? I just think it's stupid. It's my wedding, I'm inviting people. My parents are not the ones inviting everyone... or even making any decisions for that matter!
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Dec 22, 2010 06:20
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Astro7x posted:So what are the guide lines generally for including parents names on the invitations? More specifically NOT including the parents names on the invitations? is it more common these days, or will it only piss off those families that need to have the names in the certain order and read such a specific way? I just think it's stupid. It's my wedding, I'm inviting people. My parents are not the ones inviting everyone... or even making any decisions for that matter! Yes, it's your wedding, but including your parents' names can be a nice way of honoring the people who raised you. If you include one, include all. If you do decide to include parents' names, there are many ways you can go. Ours looked like this: quote:My full name It indicates that you are the hosts of the event, not your parents, but still gives them a nod. If you really have no relationship with your parents, it is not required to include them. But it's the nice thing to do.
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Dec 22, 2010 06:31
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Our wedding is in July (for the record, we'll have been engaged just shy of two years at that point) and we're making progress: we have a venue, catering, photographer, rings, and are working on the cake. So, now the hard part. Anybody have any advice on/stories about choosing an officiant? We're both agnostic, or maybe irreligious would be a better way of putting it, so we aren't looking for a minister. If we were, my uncle is a minister, so that would make life easier (although I don't have a strong relationship with him), as my mother keeps reminding me. We don't have any friends who are internet-ordained, and that's not a road we want to go down right now, although we'll see where we are in three months I guess. So, did you just hit the google and start calling people, or is there a secret to this? Neither of us has been to many weddings, and all the ones we have been to have been more traditional Christian ceremonies, so we're not even sure what to look for.
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Dec 22, 2010 17:33
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Juniper posted:Our wedding is in July (for the record, we'll have been engaged just shy of two years at that point) and we're making progress: we have a venue, catering, photographer, rings, and are working on the cake. So, now the hard part.
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Dec 22, 2010 17:45
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Juniper posted:Our wedding is in July (for the record, we'll have been engaged just shy of two years at that point) and we're making progress: we have a venue, catering, photographer, rings, and are working on the cake. So, now the hard part.
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Dec 22, 2010 17:52
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Juniper posted:Our wedding is in July (for the record, we'll have been engaged just shy of two years at that point) and we're making progress: we have a venue, catering, photographer, rings, and are working on the cake. So, now the hard part. Ask around. We ended up using the same officiant as a friend. He was an awesome, tattoo-laden guy who had done everything from very serious and formal weddings to full out pagan handfasting to mountaintop ceremonies with only 3 or 4 people there. Also, we told my husband's extended family that the officiant came as part of the wedding package because his grandfather is a minister and we didn't want him to be offended by not getting married by him.
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Dec 22, 2010 18:37
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There's plenty of "religions" that would be fine with a ceremony sans religion. I am an atheist and my fiance is...to be decided I guess, and we are going to use a Unitarian Universalist minister. I have to admit I like the "feel" of having a minister/"religious" officiant. I mean, weddings are these crazy things with plenty of bizarre customs and rituals, so I might as well embrace that in my own special way. In any case, if that interests you, I know at minimum that UUs will do just about anything with pleasure, including pagan ceremonies. If you feel vaguely Christian but agnostic about the whole thing then a United Church of Christ minister would be perfect. On the other end of the spectrum, here are some atheist-centered but basically secular wedding ideas: http://atheists.org/Atheist_Weddings
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Dec 22, 2010 20:04
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Juniper posted:Our wedding is in July (for the record, we'll have been engaged just shy of two years at that point) and we're making progress: we have a venue, catering, photographer, rings, and are working on the cake. So, now the hard part. I don't know where you live, but my court-appointed officiant said she was prevented by law about saying anything religious during the ceremony (BC, Canada). Which was fine by us since we're both atheist. We were able to have free in-home consultations with any of the officiants that were available and we chose the second one we met... it was an easy process. And they only charge $75. We threw in an extra $100 cash tip because that is ridiculously low. I had never been to a secular wedding before my own and it went great. Quick ceremony and on to the reception/fun stuff. Even most religious people don't want to sit around and listen to some guy go on for hours.
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Dec 22, 2010 22:02
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Juniper posted:Anybody have any advice on/stories about choosing an officiant? You mentioned that you had a venue decided, alot of times the people looking after the venues have good ideas and contacts for many different things. I know when we booked a hall for the reception and for the wedding (massive cordined off area) the manager of the venue literally gave us a massive book to look through for everything from DJs to Limos to officiants! If you don't have anyone you are in close contact for the venue, check with the caterers. Many of the caterers have their own locations to host and generally have contact listings. We ended up having a young woman officiant who was very helpful and offered a range of many different religious/non-religious options.
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Dec 23, 2010 14:31
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I am officially engaged! It didn't go exactly as planned, due to the ring taking so danged long to make, but hooray nonetheless! Four jewelers and a ring-maker later, the ring is almost finished. It's still short two emeralds in the band, but I've ordered those. I should be able to take care of those last two tiny gaps in the band after Christmas.  For scale's sake, those emeralds are 1mm diameter. They're tiny. The first jeweler I approached said the ring was impossible to make. She also said that it wasn't worth her time to find out where any of her stones were from, so I dropped her from the list pretty damned quickly. JohnnyRnR was able to acquire an awesome set of stones, and they were exactly what I was looking for.  I ended up finding a ring-maker in Chicago who could handle the whole 'wooden band' thing and thought he could do the weave and the inlay. He found out he didn't have the skill to do the molding on the weave, so he hired another jeweler to make it out of white gold. This jeweler was also supposed to set the stones into the band, but discovered that she couldn't do it either. She hired yet another jeweler to do all the settings into the weave. This new jeweler accounted for about two weeks of delays on her own, in addition to all the transfers / shipments that happened. Finally, the weave and stones were finished. The weave was sent back to the ring-maker in Chicago who finished off the ring and sent it to me... ... and my girlfriend got tired of waiting and proposed two days before it got here.  I said yes.
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Dec 23, 2010 15:09
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Sundae posted:Four jewelers and a ring-maker later, the ring is almost finished. It's still short two emeralds in the band, but I've ordered those. I should be able to take care of those last two tiny gaps in the band after Christmas. holy crap. I LOVE that band offtopic, when earrings are labeled 1 ct does that mean each is .5ct?
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Dec 24, 2010 04:36
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seo posted:holy crap. I LOVE that band Yes, generally it will say 1 ct tw (total weight) somewhere in the advertisement.
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Dec 24, 2010 04:47
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Anyone got any suggestions for a good, very cheap place to get save the dates? My wedding is pretty big and our budget is getting a bit stretched, but our wedding is over a holiday weekend, so Save the Dates would be really nice.
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Dec 26, 2010 02:09
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vanessa posted:I don't think it's a bad idea to have a wedding around a holiday since many people will have time off/be planning to travel anyway, but New Year's Eve is really the worst day to have a wedding. Juniper posted:Anybody have any advice on/stories about choosing an officiant? In California, anyone can be ordained for a day, just by going to the county clerk's office for a 5-minute swearing-in ceremony. No weird internet religion required. Check for something similar in your state, and have your best friend(s) do it.
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Dec 26, 2010 02:34
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Boxman posted:Anyone got any suggestions for a good, very cheap place to get save the dates? My wedding is pretty big and our budget is getting a bit stretched, but our wedding is over a holiday weekend, so Save the Dates would be really nice. You can get 100 postcards at Vista Print starting at $25. That's probably the cheapest price I ever saw when I was looking.
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Dec 26, 2010 02:53
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We made ours-- we printed ours on business cards and then stuck them on business card sized magnets.
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Dec 26, 2010 02:57
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GoreJess posted:You can get 100 postcards at Vista Print starting at $25. That's probably the cheapest price I ever saw when I was looking. And if you don't need them instantly you can try holding off on these for awhile to see if they go on sale. We got our 100 postcards for free when vista was having an awesome sale. Once you order from them they will also send you big discount offers all the drat time, which on one hand is kind of annoying, but on the other pretty spectacular; we got our invitations printed through them for super cheap too!
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Dec 26, 2010 03:34
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GoreJess posted:You can get 100 postcards at Vista Print starting at $25. That's probably the cheapest price I ever saw when I was looking. Seconding this. We got ours from Vistaprint and ended up with 100 magnets for $30, shipping and all. It was pretty awesome. If you do magnets through them, though, try to arrange your design so that the background is white. Ours is black, and the magnets weren't cut exactly evenly, leaving a very small but very uneven white border around each one. That's the only complaint we have.
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Dec 26, 2010 17:09
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Do they have the option of supplying an image with bleed? (where the image extends past where it's supposed to be cropped). It's almost impossible to avoid those white borders without bleed being provided unless they're cutting everything by hand.
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Dec 26, 2010 22:31
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I would stay away from VistaPrint, only because I've had issues with them giving wonky results in return. For 19.90~ you can get 250 postcards from gotprint.com. I discovered them recently, and their prices and quality are awesome, and if you're in SoCal you can pick up the stuff from them instead of having it shipped. I hope this is helpful!
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Dec 27, 2010 01:42
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I wanted to ask some advice about his brother and his wedding. He's marrying the first girlfriend he's ever dated this next summer and his fiancee dislikes me enough that she's made it pretty clear she dislikes me through a nasty facebook message or two. I've told his brother that I don't support weddings due to whatever personal beliefs (and I have declined attending other ones) and secondly I don't want any bullshit drama to happen. Husband is going though. Am I expected to purchase a gift or attend any receptions/family dinners with them? I would really prefer not to as it's supposed to be her special day.
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Dec 27, 2010 04:55
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My fiance and I have been engaged for over 6 months now and I think we've procrastinated long enough and need to start planning.  I'm thinking we need a wedding planner but I have no idea how much that kind of service costs, how they charge, and how to go about finding one. Can anyone recommend one in the Seattle area?
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Dec 27, 2010 08:34
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Whelp, Christmas is over so our excuse on avoiding planning is coming to a close. The good thing is the wedding won't be until Fall 2012 (we aren't in a rush), so we have time. Some nice things so far: 1. My fiance's best friend gave us her old wedding dress. So that's already taken care of, and my fiance is ecstatic over it, its really nice apparently. 2. I think her parents found us a place (over in St Louis) 3. My old roommate is a DJ 4. We have the important stuff down: we know what drinks we want Otherwise, I guess we'll just have to start planning things. I'm looking through the Op, any suggestions are always welcome. My big worry is i really want to have a good number of our friends there, and that would probably end up being the biggest expense (feeding them and whatnot).
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Dec 27, 2010 10:27
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Boxman posted:Anyone got any suggestions for a good, very cheap place to get save the dates? My wedding is pretty big and our budget is getting a bit stretched, but our wedding is over a holiday weekend, so Save the Dates would be really nice. Shutterfly is awesome for this. People thought we spent a lot of money on ours, they came really professional looking.
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Dec 27, 2010 16:15
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I'd like to announce that two more goons are finally taking the big step:) ntrepid/Josh(boyfriend of 2 years)'s hometown has a tradition of having Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus ride around town on the back of a firetruck on Christmas Eve. Since his grandpa is in charge of the Santa deal, Josh got Santa to deliver it as a special delivery. We were at his grandpa's house, opening presents and heard the firetruck come down the street. Everyone booked it outdoors, since they knew what was going to happen. I casually strolled outside, and to my surprise, the firetruck stopped! Santa announced he had a special delivery to make to Josh, and when I saw the box get handed over, I knew what was up. The whole family took videos and pictures while he proposed.
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Dec 28, 2010 06:03
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Sundae posted:I am officially engaged! It didn't go exactly as planned, due to the ring taking so danged long to make, but hooray nonetheless! This is an awesome ring. Out of curiosity, what do you mean by finding out where the emeralds come from? Was there a specific type you wanted, or was there some sort of meaning in the geographic locale? Over Christmas I had my ring redone. My boyfriend wanted to give me a specific custom ring, but his dad (the goldsmith), talked him out of it, so I ended up with a very simple, nice and ginormous (!) diamond that his dad assured him were what women wanted. Of course, when he told me about what he wanted to do, I agreed that his was the much better idea. We sat down with the artist his dad uses, who did up the wax, and his dad has done the casting and everything. We were hoping to have it done before we got home, but the gem-setter (apparently this is a profession unto itself - who knew?) is on vacation until early January, so when he gets back he's going to put in the stones and ship it out to us. I'm super excited, because so far it looks really neat. I was wanted some emeralds in it, but I guess they're quite soft and aren't much for longevity, so went with a sapphire and a ruby. Yours look like they're set in deep enough that they should be protected from most wear, I would think.
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Dec 28, 2010 19:34
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