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Ok, I've got a slightly TMI question for you all...how do you keep his *stuff* in you?? Do you stay laying for a certain amount of time after? Certain sex positions better than others?
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Dec 31, 2010 20:14
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Cork. Nah, kidding. I just laid there for a bit afterward, like 5-10 minutes, then got up and peed like I usually do.
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Dec 31, 2010 20:24
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Fire In The Disco posted:Cork. Ha! I had the same question, I like to prop my hips up with a pillow and keep my knees bent up for about 10 minutes or so. I heard it helps gravity do what gravity does best.
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Dec 31, 2010 21:47
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My husband has taken to laying on his side facing me and I lay on my back with my legs drapped over his. Helps to keep them up and we're also face to face so we can talk. It's kind of romantic. But yeah, it can be a mess. I'll generally wipe up the outside just a bit and then sit for ten minutes like I described above. Also, it's a real struggle for me because I have a bad habit of coughing afterward, so that can...er..push it out a little. That really is a lot more than I ever thought I'd share about my after sex habits.
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Dec 31, 2010 22:34
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Bodnoirbabe posted:That really is a lot more than I ever thought I'd share about my after sex habits. Ha! I feel you on that. But in all seriousness, thank you for sharing. I thought I was the only one having trouble keeping all the good stuff in. And very cute after-sex setup you guys have.
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Dec 31, 2010 23:22
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TMI Answer: We had a "sex pillow" for propping up my rear end for about 10 minutes after the deed was done. It resided behind our bedroom door so no one would accidentally sleep on the cum pillow before it was washed.
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Jan 1, 2011 01:46
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The wife and I have begun our first attempt to grow our family. Because the A/T Engagement Wedding Megathread helped with the first step, hopefully this thread will be a good companion too! She had the birth control implant removed from her arm sometime in September This current cycle marks our first attempt to time ovulation with insemination. It's so romantic. Low Percent Lunge fucked around with this message at 01:47 on Jan 6, 2011 |
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Jan 5, 2011 06:38
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Whitey Ford posted:The wife and I have begun our first attempt to grow our family. Because the A/T Engagement Wedding Megathread helped with the first step, hopefully this thread will be a good companion too! The day our daughter was most likely conceived, I interrupted my husband writing a paper at 6:30am and informed him he had a job to do. Definitely romantic!
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Jan 5, 2011 23:38
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At least you get to get some action in the process of creating offspring; I get to have a strange old man shove instruments up into my cervix at the end of the month ;P Man, before we got the definite diagnoses of azoospermia for my husband, we had many months of trying and timing and all that - I was SO burnt out on sex from all that that we sorta disliked each other between ovulations.
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Jan 6, 2011 08:51
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Ok question, what would SomethingAwful do? I work for a veterinary hospital. The staff is half decent, half total assholish dicks. The clients are nice, the pets are ok, the job itself is high stress but doable. I have been at this clinic for a year and a couple months now, getting the job after my husband told me he didn't want kids after all (he was freaking out) so I got a job to keep myself occupied. Now that he changed his mind and IUI is going to be at the end of this month, we realize that the job and pregnancy can't really coexist. I have had concussions from this job, I get bitten and scratched on a regular basis, we barely get 15-20 minute lunches some days and usually work during them, we aren't allowed time off unless it's scheduled months in advance and/or you are super duper incredibly ill, and even those last two are now nixed since one of the techs had surgery on her knee and has been out for the last 3 weeks, leaving us understaffed and overworked for the next forseeable future. I won't be allowed to take time off for my IUIs, instead I'll be hoping to schedule them around the current work schedule, which if changes after my appt is made (and they change my shifts randomly a lot) then I will have to cancel my appts with the dr. because there is no flexibility with my office. I am thinking that the smart thing to do would be to quit (derp). However I can't shake the feeling of guilt that I'd be leaving them even more understaffed with the lead tech out for her knee and unable to train a new hire, and I would hate for her to have to come back to work before she is healed and mess up her poor knee. I don't even like the woman and I feel bad about it. But really, trying to get pregnant and still being forced to do xrays, monitor anesthesia, and handle dangerous drugs, not to mention wrestle and get knocked around by 90lb dogs, just doesn't sound like a good idea. Would you all turn in your 2 weeks, or would you tough it out and give them ultimatums for your staying, pending they let you work the safe parts or you split? Note that I don't NEED this job so money isn't an issue and I have backup jobs available that are safe and nonstress like this one. If I'm quitting the letter gets turned in Monday. Please advise. I hate feeling guilty over an office I overall hate.
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Jan 7, 2011 20:27
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Papaya posted:I hate feeling guilty over an office I overall hate. My advice: put yourself first. It doesn't sound like the other employees have ever gone out of their way for you, so why do you feel guilty for not putting yourself (and a baby!) in potential harm for them? If you'd like to work as long as possible, maybe don't mention it until you know you're pregnant, then put in your two weeks? Or see if they can let you do more desk work. All in all though, if you don't need the money (you don't, so that's awesome) and aren't in love with this job, and know for sure you're working on kids, then... I'd quit. They'll work out their staffing issues and you shouldn't feel guilty! There's enough guilt in pregnancy/parenting, so don't start early  The nice people who work there will understand!Point is, the job is too dangerous for a pregnant woman. So there's really not an option -- unless you can work out a way to do desk work, filing, etc., then quitting is probably the smartest, and safest, thing to do. Leave amicably, of course. But I'm bitter about being a working mom, so maybe my advice is biased v  vEdit: and you have backup jobs! Wow, that's really nice. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I know what choice I'd make 
brambling lass fucked around with this message at 20:39 on Jan 7, 2011 |
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Jan 7, 2011 20:36
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Papaya posted:Ok question, what would SomethingAwful do? ... If you don't need the money, then there is NO reason for you to stick around, and plenty of reasons for you to leave! As we've seen repeatedly throughout this entire thread, pregnancy tends to happen after stress has been eliminated. With already existing fertility issues, keeping a highly emotionally and physically stressful job sounds like it's much more likely to dramatically reduce your chances of conceiving. It just sounds like a 'stress breeds more stress' situation. "When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute and it's longer than any hour. That's relativity." ~ Albert Einstein
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Jan 7, 2011 20:41
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I was in a very similar work environment, including being a vet tech at an understaffed clinic. I didn't leave for pregnancy/baby reasons, but I left because I was offered a better opportunity to make more money somewhere else. It was EXTREMELY difficult for me to leave because I had worked there for years, been through two ownership changes, and I was the lead tech in charge of a handful of completely newbie, didn't-know-what-the-gently caress-they-were-doing Joes off the street that were hired because they were the only people willing to take $9 an hour. I was the only one who knew how to run the blood machines, the only one who could turn on the autoclave, the only one who could do xrays, the only one who knew the computer software, etc. etc. But towards the end, I just got so fed up with not being appreciated, as much as I loved the owners as people and felt very indebted to them (they had helped me through some tough times), I had to just do what was right for me. I turned in my two weeks notice and shocked the poo poo out of everyone there who thought I'd NEVER leave. But, here I am, two years later - I have a job that I love (not as a vet tech), the clinic survived without me, and I was on nice enough terms with my old bosses to invite them to my wedding. These things seem huge when we're in the middle of them but we'll look back later and know it was the right decision. I think, from what you've described, that it's definitely time to leave. Don't risk your baby's health, or your health, especially considering what a rough time you've had conceiving, just because you feel bad about ditching some people at a clinic. They will get over it, I promise, and you'll be so much happier.
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Jan 7, 2011 22:31
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Papaya, when I reached 3rd trimester with Cecilia, it was during tax season, and I worked for a tax software company. As you can imagine, that's a really stressful time of year. My blood pressure began steadily creeping up, and my doctor said she was going to put me on restricted hours, and if that didn't work, bedrest. I really freaked out over the idea of leaving my group in the lurch during the busiest time of year. My doctor said, point blank, "YOU are the only person responsible for the growth and development of your baby right now. Work will always be there and they will always find a way to get by. You will not, if your blood pressure keeps going as it is now." That really hit home for me, and made me realize how important it was to have a healthy and sane mom during pregnancy (as well as after, of course).
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Jan 8, 2011 00:01
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Hey pregnancy thread people, I figured I'd post now after reading the thread and showing a lot of it to my wife. It's been pretty helpful for her to see she's not the only one having trouble. We've been trying to conceive since last year and haven't had any luck for 8 months now, and it's definitely been stressful. Before she got off the pill, my wife would have what we would call a fairly "normal" period, which lasted for a few days and was fairly heavy. Once she got off the pill we noticed that it was incredibly light, sometimes barely spotting at all, which we thought was weird. After a few months with no luck, having been timing it with some ovulation calendars, we moved on to ovulation strips since we were wondering if she was even ovulating at all. For the past few months we've been getting a clearly positive reading on the strips, but apparently it's possible to not drop a mature egg even with the LH rush. For some basic info she's 24 and I'm 27 so she's fairly concerned since she thinks that people our age shouldn't be having any problems. She's been having a pain in her side near where her ovary would be at, although she also has some IBS issues that we thought was causing the pain. After having an ultrasound, the techs mentioned that she had 9 follicles on that side, and 5 on the other. Is this a high amount to have growing all at once? I know you normally only drop one mature one and the rest are just kind of reabsorbed afterward. It sounded like they expected her to have a heavy period this time around...should we be concerned if it is still really light? She can also be a bit of a hypochondriac and worries about it being cancer since her grandmother had uterine cancer. I'm really hoping we get lucky this month because we're starting to get close to the 1 year mark where we really have to start worrying more since it's official that we're having fertility problems instead of us just stressing over it.
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Jan 8, 2011 05:31
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Thanks guys - it's nice to have it put into perspective by people who aren't so biased towards the situation (my inlaws, my spouse) and who can tell me like it is without being a part of it. I wrote up my letter, it's going onto her desk Monday. The two weeks following will either be pure hell or simply amazing! My first IUI should be around the 27th, too! Things are looking up
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Jan 8, 2011 05:46
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Congrats Papaya! It's not easy, I know, since I was there too-- I went on maternity leave with the intention of returning to work when Cecilia was 3 months old. I just couldn't do it, though. I couldn't be away from her. We effectively lost half of our income by me quitting, but it was the right choice (if scary at the time).
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Jan 8, 2011 05:49
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Beastyfella posted:She's been having a pain in her side near where her ovary would be at, although she also has some IBS issues that we thought was causing the pain. After having an ultrasound, the techs mentioned that she had 9 follicles on that side, and 5 on the other. Is this a high amount to have growing all at once? I know you normally only drop one mature one and the rest are just kind of reabsorbed afterward. Seems like a lot to me but it doesn't really matter as long as one is maturing. That's around the same amount I'd get in a typical month while on fertility meds, but I'm a lot older than your wife. It's unlikely that you'd have multiple follicles mature without fertility drugs. In my last IUI I had like 7 mature follicles and got the warning about how I could possibly have to selectively reduce if I ended up with multiples. It ended up negative anyway so no moral dilemma there. In my IVF I had 30 follicles and they retrieved 12 eggs. I hope you get lucky this month. Also, good luck Papaya!
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Jan 8, 2011 15:36
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Well, I'm out this cycle. Blah. However, this is the first cycle since I started using fertility awareness that I've gotten my period on the exact day that the TCOYF software predicted. I don't know how it did it considering my last 4 cycles ranged from 37 to 63 days, but it's cool anyway. Anyone have any thermometer recommendations? The first half of my chart looks normal, then the second half (after I lost my nice thermometer and bought a new one) looks like it's charting an earthquake. One morning the thermometer reads 96.5, the next it's 98.0 and the next it's 97.4. Since my temperature doesn't normally fluctuate that badly, I'm assuming it's the thermometer. Beastyfella, good luck to you! My partner and I are 25 and 26, and we've been trying for over a year now. It does suck to have trouble conceiving in your mid twenties, because you only ever read articles or hear about people in their mid-thirties or forties having trouble. I hope you get lucky soon!
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Jan 9, 2011 01:40
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Bahunter22 posted:Ha! Hah. That's what I did/do. Knees to the chest with a pillow under my bum. It's super attractive, but it worked for me. In saying that, I have a question for you guys. When talking about conception, you say to people "We've been trying for 6 months" or "we've been trying for a year" etc But in our case we've had no problem GETTING pregnant, it's just a problem with STAYING pregnant. So do we still count as having been "trying" for a year, even though we've conceived 3 times, but lost them? I guess I just feel bad saying I've been trying for a year, when I've fallen pregnant pretty easily, and there's so many women who can't even fall pregnant.
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Jan 9, 2011 10:19
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dishonesty, I still say that you've been trying, in my opinion, because what you've been trying for is a viable pregnancy that ends in a healthy baby.
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Jan 9, 2011 10:46
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What Fire In the Disco said. Trying is trying in that case - you just have nothing to show for it yet  Now what about me - I went off birth control August 2008, and we started "trying" then, for a year before we had the final sterile diagnoses for my husband; have we been "trying" since then or tried for a year and gave up? Since it's not really trying if you are rather certain your spouse is sterile - although I guess there's always that super slim chance he makes a sperm, since it's a tiny tiny unlikely possibility.
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Jan 9, 2011 22:18
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Papaya posted:What Fire In the Disco said. Trying is trying in that case - you just have nothing to show for it yet You've definitely been trying since the beginning. I figure you're "trying" from the day you and your partner decide to actively stop birth control and focus on conception. Just because your husband is sterile, it doesn't mean you're not trying for the ultimate goal of "healthy live baby" like the rest of us P.S. This poo poo is hard work. What happened to the idea that when I was a teenager, I'd get pregnant if I looked at a penis?
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Jan 10, 2011 03:43
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dishonesty posted:P.S. This poo poo is hard work. What happened to the idea that when I was a teenager, I'd get pregnant if I looked at a penis? I know, I am disappointed
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Jan 10, 2011 03:58
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dishonesty posted:P.S. This poo poo is hard work. What happened to the idea that when I was a teenager, I'd get pregnant if I looked at a penis? Given my wife and mine's experience so far, as well as the absolute goddess-like fertility of those around me, here is what I believe to be the key to pumping out a gaggle of children with no difficulties: 1). Be poor. Money causes infertility. The ability to pay for and financially prepare for the next 20 years of a child's life and education lowers your fertility exponentially. 2). Develop addictions. Gambling, drugs, alcohol, lying, smoking -- it doesn't matter. Just pick a loving vice and don't look back. Make sure you lie to everyone and get mad when confronted. Apparently, this makes eggs swoon and drop like birds in winter. 3). Don't plan for it -- or even want it. This is motherfucking key. Wanting a baby is like uterine bleach. Your body senses this using sophisticated  and reacts defensively by sending out egg catchers.4). Live in a squat 1-bedroom filthy apartment (preferably on welfare [see rule 1]). The less room you have the better. The fewer places you have to put a crib, the more likely your body will be ready to accept seed. 5). Have relationship troubles. Not little squabbles that we all have, but serious, hair-pulling, chair-throwing, loving Jerry Springer brawls. Daily. Seriously hate one another but be too poor and lazy to get a divorce. Bonus: Be female and so attached and addicted to your husband that even if he set fire to you, you wouldn't ever leave him. That's it. Easy! My wife and I are going for our third IUI attempt this week. I want a baby
Good_Vs_Evil fucked around with this message at 06:10 on Jan 11, 2011 |
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Jan 10, 2011 04:18
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I will be loving ecstatic if we get lucky on the first IUI. We're planning for 3 IUIs without intervention, then doing an HSG and trying more if those fail. It makes me have a very real heartache when my 2yr old nephew flies at me and hugs my legs, crying "My Karen, my Karen!" because he adores me.
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Jan 10, 2011 05:02
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I feel silly being so sad about getting my period this month, since I only went off the ring in early October, and I know from lurking this thread that it can take months, if not longer, to get those eggs going... but it's hard every month regardless! I've had recurring cysts since 2002, but an ultrasound a while back said that my ovaries were "healthy and full of blood." I've been taking prenatals since September. My cycle's been 30 days on the dot since then. I tried charting my temp, but it would vary hugely from day to day, so now I just use the ovulation strips, which do turn pink for a few days a month, when we have sex and sex and sex. Is there anything else basic I should be doing off the bat? Are ovulation strips ever faulty?
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Jan 10, 2011 05:30
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I turned in my two weeks notice today without much hassle at all! And my husband settled on a particular donor, and we are ordering sperm tomorrow! 
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Jan 11, 2011 05:36
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Papaya posted:I turned in my two weeks notice today without much hassle at all! Yay! Congratulations! I go in for IUI take 3 today. Yesterday they checked my ovaries for follicle goodness, and there was goodness to be found. I was also informed that the persistent cyst on my right ovary is 4 freaking centimeters. Yes, that's about two inches. At first I thought the nurse misspoke and meant millimeters, but nope, centimeters. To this I responded "That can't be good." But apparently the only problem (and I made sure this was super-confirmed) is that when it ruptures it's going to hurt like an SOB. Pain I don't care about, I can deal with it, it just seemed like a cyst that big would cause other problems. However, since it isn't raising my estrogen levels it isn't a problem apparently. The human body is interesting.
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Jan 11, 2011 14:27
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Good luck Grayscale!
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Jan 11, 2011 19:51
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Papaya posted:I turned in my two weeks notice today without much hassle at all! I love how much this sounds like take-out. Good luck!
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Jan 11, 2011 19:56
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Good luck Papaya! I was wondering if anyone else has experienced implantation bleeding? I think I may be, or maybe I'm just getting my hopes up, but it's been really odd. First thing, today is my 28th day of my cycle. My cycle is usually 32-34 days. Yesterday, which was day 27, and 11 days post-ov, when I went to the bathroom, there was brown spotting when I wiped. I checked my cervix that night and there was bright red blood, but later in the shower, nothing. And nothing on the tissue this time, it was all inside. Now, this could be a sign of my period starting, so I was a bit bummed, but confused it would come so early, as my lutal phase would have been really short. Anyhow, I was waiting for my period to start all day but nothing. Usually when I spot, my period will come that night. This morning, still nothing. As a precaution I used a tampon. I just went to change it out and there is nothing on it but very light brown, but it was mostly clean. Is this implantation? How long after implantation do you start to get symptoms of pregnancy like sore breasts and nauseau? I am getting cramping a bit, but I read this can also be part of implantation. My right breast hurts but this could also be PMS. I hate this not knowing poo poo! I looked online and it said that only a third of women get the spotting and it can sometimes look like a period, but shorter and lighter, lasting from a few hours to about 3 days.
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Jan 13, 2011 23:28
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I had implantation bleeding. It was very light and lasted about three days. I already had a positive test by that point though. I think there was some very mild cramping too. I'm now at 10 weeks and have my first doctors appointment tomorrow, and assume with all the nausea everything is going well. Oh and I think the nausea started about a week after the spotting but I'm bad at timeframes and stuff.
opie fucked around with this message at 00:45 on Jan 14, 2011 |
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Jan 14, 2011 00:42
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Grayscale Rainbow posted:Yay! Congratulations! A little cyst anecdote: I have a cyst that is about 9x6cm (last time we checked) on my right ovary. It literally has not caused me any problems at all - we only discovered it when I went for an early scan when I found out I was pregnant. They thought it would go away after the baby was born, but it hasn't. I'm having it removed because I don't want it to rupture or twist because OUCH. But yeah, I haven't even noticed that it's there. Bodies are weird. Good luck with the IUI!
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Jan 14, 2011 02:07
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I had an 11cm cyst before, during, and after my pregnancy. I ended up getting it removed (after all the fun [neg] cancer testing, woo) about 3 months after my pregnancy for the same reasons Miss Shell mentioned above, however I also ended up losing 90% of an ovary in the process due to the cyst basically taking over. I've had cysts rupture. Depending on the type of cyst your body will just absorb everything.
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Jan 14, 2011 04:42
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Thank you Bamzilla and Miss Shell! That's very reassuring.
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Jan 14, 2011 14:05
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Not pregnant. Anyhow, I was curious how much these treatements cost that some of you girls are doing. The IUI and the Clomid and on up. I know invitro is 50k+, but I know that's also like...the very last thing to do. So...cost?
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Jan 14, 2011 22:15
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I decided if I was gonna get knocked up, I wanted to do it before I turned 30 and I turned 29 in December. So I got the IUD yanked and am now simultaneously scared and excited. Yesterday was the first time in my life I have had unprotected sex.
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Jan 15, 2011 02:58
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Bodnoirbabe posted:Not pregnant. Sorry you're having trouble. Do you have any insurance coverage at all? If you want to pursue fertility treatment, you're going to need to find out if something is wrong first. I had a whole list of to-dos that I had to have done before beginning treatment to attempt to find the cause and prep. I just checked my insurance billing for these rates. Blood work has be done on you and your partner. This alone is like $2000 if you have no insurance, but mine was covered. An HSG is like $1500, which checks for blocked fallopian tubes. My doctor called this necessary for "irregular periods" and it was covered. A sperm analysis is like $75 or so and will tell you count/quality/mobility etc. of your partner's sperm. Clomid and Ovidrel (an injection used to trigger ovulation) are fairly cheap for fertility drugs. Like under $200 for both. For IUI, you have to be monitored through the cycle, starting with a baseline ultrasound/bloodwork when you get your period, then you start your drugs (Clomid or injectibles). They have you come back every few days for more ultrasound/bw to check your progress. They're looking for follicle growth and checking hormone levels. Once you get close to having a decent number of mature follicles, you trigger and come back like two days later for IUI. I think ballpark an IUI cycle is going to run around $1200 (including monitoring, sperm washing, insemination) if you're paying out of pocket. Fertility clinics have other rates for people without insurance, and since I had it, I don't know what they offer. My injectibles were not covered under my insurance even though I had $20,000 worth of lifetime fertility coverage. I was fortunate to get some donated meds but out-of-pocket I probably spent around $8K for 4 IUIs and 1 IVF. I started off doing 2 Menopur vials a day for around 6 days ($69 x 2 x 6 = $828). With each passing IUI, my meds were upped to the point when I was doing almost $500 worth of injectibles per day! I responded fine to injectibles, but just did not get pregnant with IUI. I did get some donated meds since I had spent soooo much money and they knew I was desperate towards the end. When I graduated from fertility clinic to my OB/GYN, I happily donated all the extra Menopur, Crinone, and Endometrin I had leftover. My IVF cycle of retrieval and transfer was billed as $12000ish to the insurance company. The insurance company paid "the agreed upon rate" of $5000 to the hospital/doctors/anesthesiologist. I only had to pay my copay ($30). Those copays add up throughout the year, but your mileage may vary depending on what coverage you have/don't have. To cryofreeze my extra embryos, it was $850 cash and I have to pay like $200/year for maintenance until I donate or abandon them. This was a no-brainer considering how much medication costs. If your IVF fails and you have extra embryos available frozen (only 30% of people usually do), you can do an FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer) which is a lot cheaper than IVF since the expensive part is meds/retrieval. If you're thinking about taking something like this on, I highly recommend getting an FSA account so you can spread your costs throughout the year and save on taxes. I put $2200 in my account for 2010 and it was used up by summer, because I had some dental work done too. Apparently for overruns (like the thousands I paid for in meds out of pocket), you can claim on your taxes if you file long form. If you have no coverage at all, you can meet with your local fertility clinic and see what kind of payment plans/options they have. I had to pay $30 for every visit (countless over the year) but apparently out-of-pocket people were spared that. For young, healthy people, there are often "studies" where you can participate in drug trials and get free/reduced treatment. There can be a lot of hurdles with this though (like already had a failed IVF or such). Also, one big thing to be aware of: with IUI and IVF your chance of having twins goes up A LOT so be prepared for that. Good luck.
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Jan 15, 2011 03:08
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Wow, Farrah! Thanks for all the info. I do have insurance, but I don't know what it covers as far as infertility treatments, but my understanding is that in general insurance companies don't really cover anything. Although, the cost doesn't sound like it would bankrupt me, it's certainly nothing to sneeze at. I think we're just going to take a break. I'm going to work on losing weight and we'll concentrate on it at a later time.
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Jan 15, 2011 03:19
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