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I must admit I watched about half of the come dance with me/so you think you can dance program on bbc1 last saterday. Now ostensibly I was only doing it as didn't have anything better to do wanted to look at barely dressed cute chicks, however I discovered a much better way to watch the program. Basically you try to guess which of male dancers isn't a blatant flaming homosexual before he talks. Its amazing, before I got sick of myself for watching it there was one guy who didn't have the affects.
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May 1, 2011 15:19
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Graviton v2 posted:I must admit I watched about half of the come dance with me/so you think you can dance program on bbc1 last saterday. Now ostensibly I was only doing it as didn't have anything better to do wanted to look at barely dressed cute chicks, however I discovered a much better way to watch the program. Basically you try to guess which of male dancers isn't a blatant flaming homosexual before he talks. Its amazing, before I got sick of myself for watching it there was one guy who didn't have the affects. Ignoring the really creepy homophobia here, I think you can feel comfortable watching So You Think You Can Dance. It's not like the usual reality TV where the haul out the dregs just to mock them, these people actually have talent. They genuinely CAN dance, and they're good. I was in stitches all through the ballet dancer's Japanese-style-hip-hop last wee.
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May 1, 2011 15:59
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So what exactly is going on with Don't Scare the Hare - all I saw was someone pulling a lever, some kind of explosions and a giant robotic hare spinning around and everyone yelling...! Are they all on drugs nowadays?
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May 1, 2011 16:33
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thehustler posted:This is a perfect post that anybody between the ages of about 25-40 could agree with. Things were so much more fun then, lighthearted entertainment to watch with the family. These days it's all too engineered, and the celebrity culture has ruined everything, with its aspirations and fakeness. I'm 21, just barely old enough to remember The Generation Game and the like, and even I agree with that post. Lately it's like, as soon as one talent show/singing contest thing ends another begins, with good odds it will feature either Simon Cowell, a man slowly being devoured by the waistline of his trousers, or Andrew Lloyd Webber, alias Baron Greenback, as my dad calls him. At least we have The Hoff now?
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May 1, 2011 16:33
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trouser_mouse posted:So what exactly is going on with Don't Scare the Hare - all I saw was someone pulling a lever, some kind of explosions and a giant robotic hare spinning around and everyone yelling...! Are they all on drugs nowadays? Half of us think it is some sort of social experiment or long winded joke, the other half think it is just insane cheaply made and planned bollocks.
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May 1, 2011 16:37
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I'm pretty sure they've handed Saturday night over to the CBBC team as a cost savings measure.
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May 1, 2011 16:40
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Strom Cuzewon posted:Ignoring the really creepy homophobia here, I think you can feel comfortable watching So You Think You Can Dance. It's not like the usual reality TV where the haul out the dregs just to mock them, these people actually have talent. They genuinely CAN dance, and they're good. I was in stitches all through the ballet dancer's Japanese-style-hip-hop last wee.
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May 1, 2011 17:11
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Graviton v2 posted:Oh gently caress off with your PC, how can one not notice how flaming these dudes are? I think the point is that nobody actually gives a gently caress
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May 1, 2011 17:12
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DaWolfey posted:I think the point is that nobody actually gives a gently caress
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May 1, 2011 17:18
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It's PC gone mad, you can't even mock people for being gay anymore.
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May 1, 2011 17:21
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Graviton v2 posted:Oh gently caress off with your PC, how can one not notice how flaming these dudes are? Although the dramatic build ups and "nail biting" tension really irritate me (I even started watching Masterchef last year at double speed), the thing that really gets to me is the manipulation of naive/stupid people on X-Factor style shows. I understand that people put themselves up, so they only have themselves to blame - and if they got through, they'd get all of the applause - but at the same time, there are so many levels of manipulation to the show, just so that the audience can laugh hysterically at someone having a mental breakdown. You're daft enough to apply for a show when you can barely sing, and for some reason, your family are deluded enough to believe that you can sing too (whereas my family would be sensible enough to pull me to one side and point out that I couldn't!). You go to the auditions and a producer puts you through. At this point, as you're convinced that you can sing, the thought that you're being put through to be laughed at doesn't even enter your head. You get through, and then you're laughed at by all of the judges. You're convinced that it's some sort of mistake and the production team encourages you and your entourage to go and beg the judges to be put through. Cue mass hysteria, and you're still thrown out of the show, whilst the judges shake their heads sadly, and the audience is wetting themselves at just how ridiculous you are. It's just seems pointlessly cruel, particularly when it's obvious that someone's not quite the full shilling. And that's the bit of the show everyone proudly says that they watch. "Yeah, it's boring when the talented singers are competing; I only watch the hilarious auditions." 
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May 1, 2011 17:25
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Testro posted:Wow. Who want to be a millionaire was the first time I remember this, (i'm 21, so i guess there might be an obvious first show that did this for older people), but I swear I remember a really knowing 'ohoh look how silly it is to stretch out the answer like this' that the show has. The loving ridiculousness of it seems to go over a lot of people's heads these days. edit> Also, I only saw the last moments of the Masterchef final, the three people presenting there meals, but it seemed quite nice really, moved along fairly rapidly, everyone had nice things said about them, the word beautiful was mentioned roughly one million times. ScipioAfro fucked around with this message at 17:56 on May 1, 2011 |
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May 1, 2011 17:54
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Graviton v2 posted:Oh gently caress off with your PC, how can one not notice how flaming these dudes are? gently caress off you dick
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May 1, 2011 18:02
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ScipioAfro posted:Who want to be a millionaire was the first time I remember this, (i'm 21, so i guess there might be an obvious first show that did this for older people), but I swear I remember a really knowing 'ohoh look how silly it is to stretch out the answer like this' that the show has. The loving ridiculousness of it seems to go over a lot of people's heads these days. Yes, definitely. WWTBAM set up the whole phoney atmosphere, but then they at least sped through the first round of questions to get to the ones that warranted a bit of tension. The audience and contestants would laugh when Tarrant gave a long pause and then said "we'll find out after the break! v  v". Now you have enormous close-ups of the contestants and their family weeping a little, it's scored like the end of the world, and then after a while someone whispers "we'll find out after the break...  " and everyone literally shrieks like they're dying. What is wrong with these people.
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May 1, 2011 18:12
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I don't even understand why the judges are judges really. At least on masterchef they know about food. On Britain's Best Singer shows they have a bunch of dicks with face-lifts pause for minutes before saying anything and then when they do it's nothing interesting or relevant. I want to know when Sherlock and Luther are back on. I read something about it being in summer but, doesn't look like it at the moment.
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May 1, 2011 18:57
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Went to see Stewart Lee perform this in Cheltenham yesterday. It was an...odd night.
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May 1, 2011 20:04
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So with all the Don't Scare The Hare talk, I watched an episode of it on the iplayer and my oh my. So the Hare is easily frightened by loud noises and the contestants are trying to complete various tasks - presumably at the Hares whim - in order for them to receive carrots from the Hare. I assume these are valuable so they can be sold to make up the cash prize at the end. So the objective is - please the Hare by completing its tasks, get carrots from the Hare, receive money. Then - subterfuge! They play a game where the contestants dress as thieves and steal the Hares carrots from its garden while it watches. The audacity! The brevity! They have to remain quiet or the Hare gets scared and flees and they don't want that for some reason. They've been trying to acquire carrots by any means necessary and up to this point they've only been able to do it by legitimate means, but that's all changed. In the final game the true motivations of the contestants are revealed. The Hare, betrayed by the thieves naturally wants its carrots back and the show takes a sinister turn: It's not the carrots that are the prize, they were a distraction and were never valuable, no, it's the Hare itself! Considering it's a fairly sleek looking robot whose roboty nature had been ignored it shouldn't really come as much of a surprise that it would be important eventually. Perhaps it has been granted sentience by God (aka the mysterious "Voice of the Forest" as played by Sue Perkins) and the contestants, realising its value, want to capture and sell it to Cyberdyne systems. Taking the carrots was just a way of getting the Hare where they needed it - inside a pen, trapped under a net with its own carrots used a lure. The poor Hare, confused, pays its own ransom to be released and the whole cycle begins again next week as the hipster version of Richard O'Brian from The Crystal Maze, instrumental in his friends betrayal walks away with the naive Hare who never realises who it is who keeps tipping people off to the location of his secret giant carrot garden.
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May 1, 2011 20:11
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DaWolfey, that was the best thing I've seen in weeks. I was in Ikea today as well, so you cleared a fairly high bar there!
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May 1, 2011 20:34
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I'm watching Don't Scare the Hare on iPlayer right now. DaWolfey's already summed most of it up, so instead I'll just say that this show is loving weird and I never want to see it again.
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May 1, 2011 20:40
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Now explain why it's an allegory for class struggle in Bolshevik Russia.
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May 1, 2011 21:08
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They should move pointless to saturday night before who. What a night of TV. edit: the hare is the working classes and the contestants attempts to complete the tasks without scaring it mirrors the capitalist attempts to exploit the proletariat while using the welfare system to just stop short of revolution. In becoming scared, the hare breaks free of it's shackles and no longer allows itself to be exploited. Algol Star fucked around with this message at 22:28 on May 1, 2011 |
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May 1, 2011 22:25
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I have noticed people complaining about Saturday night TV but has anyone been watching the one gem BBC4 is putting out that evening, French police/justice system/crime drama Spiral (aka Engrenages)? Series 3 has been airing and should be all up on iPlayer right now and I am wondering if anyone else has been following it. There were some fantastic juicy pre-finale twists last night. If you don't know the show, it's tempting but not entirely honest to call it a French Wire; there's definitely the same cynical focus on the inadequacy of public institutions versus the brutal reality of street crime and high-end corruption, but there's a pastiche of every format of cop show in there somewhere. Still, it's gritty, noirish and very, very French. There is Judge Roban, the wiry, uptight, moral-crusadin' walking anachronism from France's bizarre inquisitorial-judge system (they get to do their own investigations), and Josephine Karlsson, the utterly amoral redhead defence lawyer who is nonetheless admired by all the male cast (and me) because of how impressively ruthless and smokin' hot she is. But best of all is Inspector Laure Berthard, the farcically determined, emotionally needy borderline sexual predator with serious anger management issues who is also our protagonist and heroine. BBC4 ran Spiral right after Danish crime import The Killing, so most of the comments on the Guardian page are people outraged that Berthard is not the reserved, humbly competent lady detective that that show provided (SARAH LUND WOULD NEVER THREATEN TO EXECUTE A TAXI DRIVER IN PUBLIC, SARAH LUND WOULD NEVER HARASS A SUSPECT INTO AN EPILEPTIC FIT, SARAH LUND WOULD NEVER ILLEGALLY COVER UP A COLLEAGUE'S ACCIDENTALLY SHOOTING A DRUG DEALER IN THE LUNG, etc.) Which just makes me love her more.
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May 1, 2011 22:54
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ScipioAfro posted:Who want to be a millionaire was the first time I remember this, (i'm 21, so i guess there might be an obvious first show that did this for older people), but I swear I remember a really knowing 'ohoh look how silly it is to stretch out the answer like this' that the show has. The loving ridiculousness of it seems to go over a lot of people's heads these days. Ever see the footage of WWTBAM without the tension-building music? Nothing like the actual show, it was some electronic thing instead on the pilot. I think it was on some documentary.
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May 1, 2011 23:17
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If they took out all the pauses and stuff the shows would probably only last 15 minutes. I'm already not looking forward to when they rebrand WWTBAM in 5 years and film it in somebodies home or some poo poo to combine noels house party and chris tarant. I watched Banged Up Abroad tonight. I usually dislike these shows as I see them as almost being propaganda for not committing crimes (Road Wars, Camera Cops, whatever), but Banged Up Abroad is a little funnier as I can imagine it as poo poo versions of Midnight Express.
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May 1, 2011 23:58
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justcola posted:If they took out all the pauses and stuff the shows would probably only last 15 minutes. And this is why The Fuse is the only quiz show worth a drat. Lots of questions, strict time limit, big fizzing flames to make sure you panic. Pointles does what, 10 questions a show? The Fuse does that in a minute.
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May 2, 2011 00:03
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Imagine Deal or No Deal without the useless pausing, artificial tension building and bollocks with a guy on the phone. You could order 22 boxes in about 30 seconds and produce exactly the same result. But TV producers cream themselves about that tension. It's like making a cheap psychological horror film. You only need three DVR cameras, but people react like you've spent millions. God I miss the old days of the first batch of WWTBAM pub machines when I could get £30 out of one a week.
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May 2, 2011 00:04
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thehustler posted:Ever see the footage of WWTBAM without the tension-building music? Nothing like the actual show, it was some electronic thing instead on the pilot. I think it was on some documentary. So I typed wwtbam pilot in to youtube and found this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYULDmDGlGI E> Speaking of time filling, the Great British Food program, whatever it was called, made me want to sit with a stopwatch and work out how much time was actually spent teaching me things, and not talking about the presenters childhood, or loving all the other useless poo poo that every remotely 'educational' program is coached in. Then the idea of actually sitting in front of the TV with a stopwatch made me incredibly depressed and I had to go outside and not watch TV for a while. ScipioAfro fucked around with this message at 00:16 on May 2, 2011 |
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May 2, 2011 00:10
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GimpChimp posted:I have noticed people complaining about Saturday night TV but has anyone been watching the one gem BBC4 is putting out that evening, French police/justice system/crime drama Spiral (aka Engrenages)?
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May 2, 2011 00:41
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wickles posted:Yes it is great and has been discussed before! Would recommend it to anyone into this type of thing. Start with Series 1 though. Yes, my mum is hooked on it now. I'm going to binge through it from the start of season one once I've finished uni in a few weeks.
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May 2, 2011 01:32
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LE0N posted:Sorry if this has been already posted in this thread, but this is a thing that is happening Should have been set in Liverpool and called the "Mersey Shore" missed opportunity there
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May 2, 2011 01:34
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Strom Cuzewon posted:And this is why The Fuse is the only quiz show worth a drat. Lots of questions, strict time limit, big fizzing flames to make sure you panic. Pointles does what, 10 questions a show? The Fuse does that in a minute. 15 to 1 was truly the quiz show's quiz show. William G. Stewart gave no gently caress as to who you were or where you were from.
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May 2, 2011 10:23
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I'm trying to remember a programme that was on around 1993/4. It was about an English guy who goes to play for Barcelona under an English manager. From memory, I assume they were based on Lineker and Venables, but can't really remember much else. Anyone any ideas?
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May 2, 2011 12:13
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GimpChimp posted:But best of all is Inspector Laure Berthard, the farcically determined, emotionally needy borderline sexual predator with serious anger management issues who is also our protagonist and heroine. BBC4 ran Spiral right after Danish crime import The Killing, so most of the comments on the Guardian page are people outraged that Berthard is not the reserved, humbly competent lady detective that that show provided (SARAH LUND WOULD NEVER THREATEN TO EXECUTE A TAXI DRIVER IN PUBLIC, SARAH LUND WOULD NEVER HARASS A SUSPECT INTO AN EPILEPTIC FIT, SARAH LUND WOULD NEVER ILLEGALLY COVER UP A COLLEAGUE'S ACCIDENTALLY SHOOTING A DRUG DEALER IN THE LUNG, etc.) Which just makes me love her more. I wouldn't really call Lund humble, just stoic. I have to say I got really put off by the racism in the 2nd episode of Spiral, as well as the really pointless nudity. I mean the first time with the video was fine, it was advancing the plot, but when the judge comes in and watches it twice 'to make sure' it was a blatant pad the episode with some non-mascerated titties thing.
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May 2, 2011 12:43
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Theshby posted:15 to 1 was truly the quiz show's quiz show. William G. Stewart gave no gently caress as to who you were or where you were from. And by the finals it was hard as gently caress.
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May 2, 2011 14:19
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Rolled Cabbage posted:I wouldn't really call Lund humble, just stoic. I have to say I got really put off by the racism in the 2nd episode of Spiral, as well as the really pointless nudity. I mean the first time with the video was fine, it was advancing the plot, but when the judge comes in and watches it twice 'to make sure' it was a blatant pad the episode with some non-mascerated titties thing. I just assumed that it was just being 'French' for lack of a better explanation.
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May 2, 2011 16:11
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Who Dares Wins is terrible for "If it's wrong, you're wrong but if it's right, it's right" tension, wastes so much time and then when it comes to showing the answers they flash up for 1 second and are gone for all eternity. Terrible time management, and it was a better show when it was Wipeout.
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May 2, 2011 17:03
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I just watched the secret millionaire in Middlesbrough. Very rarely cry when I see stuff on TV. Did.
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May 2, 2011 23:27
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Sion posted:I just watched the secret millionaire in Middlesbrough. Very rarely cry when I see stuff on TV. It's the most manipulative programme on the box.
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May 3, 2011 11:57
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As someone who works with UKBA and has married a non-EU national the current plot line with Mercy and Fatboy is really irritating me. First of all, from my experience, I doubt UKBA would have gone to all the effort to find Mercy in such a short period of time based off a phone call, although I'll let the writers off for that, they can pretend UKBA was having a good day for once and responded quickly. Fatboy's plan to marry her so she can stay in the country would never work. Unless you already have settled status in the UK you can't apply for a spouse visa in the UK as a foreign national, so she would have to return to her own country anyway to apply for the visa. Then she'd need to give a valid reason on her application to explain why she's overstayed her previous visa for such a long time, which she'll never be able to do. Then Fatboy would have to provide evidence that he has enough funds to support both himself and Mercy with resorting to public funds, and that he has suitable accomodation for both of them. Somehow I don't think his lovely stall in the market and his apparent lack of savings is going to cover that. Also add to that they couldn't even get married in the first place as Mercy doesn't have a valid visa, let alone a visa which she could actually get married on. Now I know it's a little like a gun nut getting upset because someone doesn't hold a gun with their fingers in the right place, but it does give the impression that fake marriages are actually really easy to pull of, when speaking from personal experience getting a spousal visa is a difficult and stressful process. It's all very Daily Mail of the BBC to have a plotline like that.
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May 3, 2011 13:35
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I have no idea what you're talking about, and I think that's for the best.
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May 3, 2011 13:55
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