The neverending Weekend Web thread for bad posts about football

Lowden Swain · # ? Jun 5, 2011 15:50

lomzus posted:

These ambassadors at the top of footballs governing body work tirelessly, sometimes for hours at a time to make football more better.

This isn't a bad post, it's genius.

Adbot · # ? May 14, 2024 23:10

Loving Africa Chaps · # ? Jun 5, 2011 16:25

SteadfastMeat posted:

now I wanna get all my leeds shirts and make some ridiculous conglomeration of all of them. gonna wear all the shirts. The Realest Fan

there's a guy i occasionally see at the emirates who has that years away and home kit stitched together half and half

The Mash · # ? Jun 6, 2011 08:01

lomzus posted:

I feel sorry for FIFA, the press have a real hatred for them and keep making scurrilous accusations. Last wek the BBC did a dreadful documentary accusing all and sundry of bribery and corruption, this week both candidates for presidency and the whiter than white Mr Warner has have been accused of offering cash incentives, it's fucling ridiculous.

These ambassadors at the top of footballs governing body work tirelessly, sometimes for hours at a time to make football more better. Bringing countries like Qatar into the fold With it's massive population of nearly a million and a half people is a stroke of genius. Qatar have too much money and quite like a bit of a kick about after drilling for oil, by taking some of their money, FIFA officials can now fly to more places and spread the word to other nations who should host the world cup, like Andorra or Greenland.

And don't even raise the nonsense about goal line gadgetry, when sep blather was young, football was a gentlemans game where honesty and integrity were the technology that mattered. Also the stuff available today is not supplied by any companies owned or represented by a FIFA member so it can't be trusted. They have also allegedly refused point blank to help with the associated costs of getting the FIFA boys together to make a decision, and Lear jets don't run on chip fat you know.

I think we should take a long hard look at what these guys bring to football and show them a little more respect, they know what they're doing and they know what's best, and the best costs money

Next week I will be doing an article on how the Italian prime minister is trying reenergise politics by touching the younger generation

this is a joke post in case you didn't get it

lomzus · lomzus Mar 18, 2009

The Mash posted:

this is a joke post in case you didn't get it

i�m sorry the mash

The Mash · # ? Jun 6, 2011 10:04

lomzus posted:

i�m sorry the mash

it's ok

c0burn · # ? Jun 8, 2011 07:54

"Liverpools vendetta in f***ing over Newcastle is taken to a new extreme. In addition to taking all of our good players, and going for the same players in the market as us, they are now giving Sunderland shitloads of money so that the chances of them finishing above us next season increases"

Grievo · # ? Jun 8, 2011 09:23

c0burn posted:

"Liverpools vendetta in f***ing over Newcastle is taken to a new extreme. In addition to taking all of our good players, and going for the same players in the market as us, they are now giving Sunderland shitloads of money so that the chances of them finishing above us next season increases"

Those 4-3 games ruined my childhood.

Jose · # ? Jun 8, 2011 12:24

loving lol. Where did that come from?

MrL_JaKiri · # ? Jun 8, 2011 20:35

Jose posted:

loving lol. Where did that come from?

I love the logic in that one.

Jose · # ? Jun 8, 2011 20:39

Its genius, I just wonder where it was posted

c0burn · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:09

http://www.newcastle-online.org/nufcforum/index.php?topic=68418.9930

Jose · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:17

I avoid all fan forums because I assume they're awful. So glad this thread has the best posts from them

c0burn · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:26

Thats loving bullshit. If they appoint a vile pig like Rafa they are alienating a big portion of the fans. People pay to support a team they can get behind, i physically hate Rafa Benitez and will stop watching football if he becomes our manager. I will also do what i can to voice my displeasure at Randy.

Rafa Benitez is a gutter swine piece of poo poo gently caress. He better stay the gently caress away from Villa.

Can't people just accept Rafa is a devisive person, can you just accept many of us utterly hate him and that for the good of villa and the fans we should just not appoint a manager the divides all from the start. We need a man we will alll get behind even if we didn't rate them. Coyle or Martinez are managers we'd give a chance too. Rafa will only get all my hatred if he was manager. He is such a horrible human being, and we'd be made to appoint another ex Liverpool failure.

It's nothing to do with what he's won. I just physically hate the man like most people on this planet do. I couldn't stomach the vile swine as thehead of our club. We are better than that. I'm seething with rage now just at the thought of him. I need to avoid this thread for awhile.

I won't boo my team or anything. I just couldn't bear to even think of that man as our manager. I hate him with such a pssion that it would equal my love of villa. I'd have to avoid football until he was gone.

Total Meatlove · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:32

did rafa kill his family or something

BigJimSlade · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:34

Wow, that's a really impressive level of anger.

Eric Cantonese · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:36

c0burn posted:

Thats loving bullshit. If they appoint a vile pig like Rafa they are alienating a big portion of the fans. People pay to support a team they can get behind, i physically hate Rafa Benitez and will stop watching football if he becomes our manager. I will also do what i can to voice my displeasure at Randy.

Rafa Benitez is a gutter swine piece of poo poo gently caress. He better stay the gently caress away from Villa.

Can't people just accept Rafa is a devisive person, can you just accept many of us utterly hate him and that for the good of villa and the fans we should just not appoint a manager the divides all from the start. We need a man we will alll get behind even if we didn't rate them. Coyle or Martinez are managers we'd give a chance too. Rafa will only get all my hatred if he was manager. He is such a horrible human being, and we'd be made to appoint another ex Liverpool failure.

It's nothing to do with what he's won. I just physically hate the man like most people on this planet do. I couldn't stomach the vile swine as thehead of our club. We are better than that. I'm seething with rage now just at the thought of him. I need to avoid this thread for awhile.

I won't boo my team or anything. I just couldn't bear to even think of that man as our manager. I hate him with such a pssion that it would equal my love of villa. I'd have to avoid football until he was gone.

drat. Does he actually give a reason for thinking he's a horrible human being?

Jose · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:38

Lol, there is not liking him and then there is that. I don't even really get why anyone who doesn't support a team he has managed would really care much about him. Its not like he was in the media loads slating everyone. Well except Fat Sam but who honestly gives a poo poo?

c0burn · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:41

http://www.villatalk.com/index.php?name=PNphpBB2&file=viewtopic&t=69060&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=1245

Xabi · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:44

Smart fella.

Eric Cantonese · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:48

From that Villatalk site...

CVByrne posted:

I can,t imagine Randy would appoint Rafa, he wouldn't do that to us. You can't appoint a manager that so many people despise. I didn't hate Houllier by do detest to my utter core Rafa Benitez.

Randy won't do that to us.

Are people from Birmingham usually like this?

Eric Cantonese fucked around with this message at 22:52 on Jun 8, 2011

Electronico6 · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:50

guy from Villa talk posted:

I'm sure most Villa fans are normal, decent individuals. Unfortunately we are judged these days by what we say on forums. Some of the opinions expressed on here are a gift to anyone who wants to portray Villa fans as a bunch of unpleasant yobs. Can't we treat people with a little bit more respect even if they don't happen to be our favourite characters.

His on to something there. :tinfoil:

c0burn · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:53

Villa have the 2nd worst fans after Newcastle.

Jose · # ? Jun 8, 2011 22:58

All fans are as bad as each other. But scousers are still worst.

Lowden Swain · # ? Jun 9, 2011 01:18

c0burn posted:

Villa have the 2nd worst fans after Newcastle.

This is a compliment coming from you.

Paul Pot · # ? Jun 9, 2011 08:57

c0burn posted:

Thats loving bullshit. If they appoint a vile pig like Rafa they are alienating a big portion of the fans. People pay to support a team they can get behind, i physically hate Rafa Benitez and will stop watching football if he becomes our manager. I will also do what i can to voice my displeasure at Randy.

Rafa Benitez is a gutter swine piece of poo poo gently caress. He better stay the gently caress away from Villa.

Can't people just accept Rafa is a devisive person, can you just accept many of us utterly hate him and that for the good of villa and the fans we should just not appoint a manager the divides all from the start. We need a man we will alll get behind even if we didn't rate them. Coyle or Martinez are managers we'd give a chance too. Rafa will only get all my hatred if he was manager. He is such a horrible human being, and we'd be made to appoint another ex Liverpool failure.

It's nothing to do with what he's won. I just physically hate the man like most people on this planet do. I couldn't stomach the vile swine as thehead of our club. We are better than that. I'm seething with rage now just at the thought of him. I need to avoid this thread for awhile.

I won't boo my team or anything. I just couldn't bear to even think of that man as our manager. I hate him with such a pssion that it would equal my love of villa. I'd have to avoid football until he was gone.

sounds like rafa pissed off al qaeda's birmingham sleeper cell

MrL_JaKiri · # ? Jun 9, 2011 10:01

Paul Pot posted:

sounds like rafa pissed off al qaeda's birmingham sleeper cell

They're West Brom fans, not seen Monkeydust?

Voluspa · # ? Jun 10, 2011 02:43

quote:

I don't care how many goals he scored last year, I don't care how many goals he'll score this year because every time he starts, we're effectively playing with 10 men.

He's fat, he's slow, his touch is horrible, he's constantly fouling the opposition, straying into offside positions and generally just being a moaning c***. He's a pathetic footballer, and I can't believe this c*** is our captain.

Kevin Nolan

bobgeldofsunderwear · # ? Jun 10, 2011 19:51

nutjob posted:

Two, possibly three, white players in the whole bunch. An award would be nice for English women. There is something faintly admirable about their dedication to the cause of destroying their own people, for which they receive not a word of thanks. Now Mr Young's fiancee, one Kelly Pike, joins the pantheon of selfless activists. It should be remembered that no woman trawling the nightclubs of England looking for racially fashionable sportsmen to service faces an easy task. Competition is fierce. What's more modern architecture in our city centres permits few back alleys with which to cement relations these days. A further complication is that many of these noble young creatures prefer to 'go Asian' than be accused of loyalty or, as the Independent and the French FA prefer, 'racial profiling'. As we search for the generosity of spirit to applaud Ms. Pike's wish to bring humanity together, a desire set to bear even more fruit in the coming years, perhaps we should also call to mind why globalist fanatics ignore biology, and claim that men and women are no different in the way they think - a lie to which the next peal of celebrity wedding bells should provide a sturdy rebuttal.

From this article on the England Under 21 squad.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/fo...evelopment.html

I...I just don't know what he is on about.

The Finn · # ? Jun 10, 2011 19:56

bobgeldofsunderwear posted:

From this article on the England Under 21 squad.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/fo...evelopment.html

I...I just don't know what he is on about.

He basically calls Ashley Young's fiance a friend of the family lover in so many words

oystertoadfish · # ? Jun 10, 2011 20:00

white man feels emasculated by white women having sex with black men, lashes out against both individual women who do it and, in the last sentence, the entire gender. that's about as vile as you will get. he has a thesaurus though. rahowa

for more information on this topic consider googling "david allen coe - my wife ran off with a"

oystertoadfish fucked around with this message at 20:02 on Jun 10, 2011

vyelkin · vyelkin Jan 2, 2011

i fel that man u are ojn the right track if reports are correct
the spanish goalie & the villa winger a re good signings
the centre half seems like over provision bearing in mind the other 4 centre halves on the books
liverpool have staked all on caroll & henderson
personally i feel they paid �5m over the odds for both men
they need a left back
if they sign the frenchman from arsenal it will be a step in the right direction
kenny appears to buy a raincoat when his boots are leaking
ie an attacker when the defence is the problem
this sort of myopic thinking marred his 1st speel as manager
arsenal have sign the lad from soton with a doubke barrelled name
they pipped man u for him
a good signing i feel
they are also bringing in young defenders which is good
all they need now is a decent goalie
spurs too need another centre half & a long term goalie
does anyone agree with me that seamus coleman of everton was the steal of the decade at �900,000?
his pace & committment transform everton from a mid-table side to a good attacking force
if only they can hang onto their bright young stars
also srtengthen their small squad?
if so the europa league beckons

8raz · # ? Jun 13, 2011 02:29

Why did EFC never sue the government or Liverpool FC for our European ban in 1985?

Everton had never had any hooligan problem or caused any trouble yet they were banned from the European Cup through no fault of their own because of the actions of Liverpool fans at the Heysel Stadium.

Everton had an exceptional team and manager at the time but it was soon broken up as the best players left to play for clubs that could play in Europe such as Rangers.

If that ban had not happened it could have been Everton that were the dominant English club of the 90s and beyond - as Man Utd became.

Surely Everton could seek recompense for the wrong they suffered.

Looking back at this point you could say the damage could easily amount to 500 million.

c0burn · # ? Jun 13, 2011 08:26

ifithadntbeenferheysel

Eric Cantonese · # ? Jun 13, 2011 23:29

http://www.kickette.com/party-people-the-flying-dutchmen-go-wild/#IDComment161179432

Maria posted:

well its another Spain vs Neitherlands .. jaajjajaa .. (bad joke sorry) ...

I don't think married men should be out at the club .. without the wives knowing or being there...because you don't know what one girl would do ... & i hope the in few weeks / months ... we dont get a news .. saying some chick came out & said ... he rapped me ... i slept w/him .. & i'm pregnant with his baby... because I'm getting sick & tired of those cases ... it feels to me .. that every week somebody that is "famous" has a similar story ... (especially here in the USA ...) they just give women a bad name ...

BUT .. it's really is up to the couple if they are ok with their partner going out to a club with friends..

Paperhouse · # ? Jun 19, 2011 20:14

Changes to improve football?

1 point for a home draw.
2 points for an away draw.
3 points for the win.

The Goal keeper cannot handle ANY form of pass/header back, unless its a save.

It doesnt matter when the foul happens, be it first minute or the last, if its a yellow card offence, a yellow card should be given.

The game should not be stopped for goal keeper injuries, the goal keeper must removed from the field of play and an outfield player play in goal, and the goal keeper cannot return to the field until the ball goes out of play.

Similarly, injured players who require treatment cannot return to the pitch until the ball goes out of play and the referee lets them back on.

Substitutions cannot be made in injury time under any circumstances.

Throw ins/corners must be taken by the closest member of the team the throw has been awarded to.

and a load of other stuff.

Babby Thatcher · # ? Jun 19, 2011 23:47

Paperhouse posted:

The game should not be stopped for goal keeper injuries, the goal keeper must removed from the field of play and an outfield player play in goal, and the goal keeper cannot return to the field until the ball goes out of play.

Pulis

quote:

Throw ins/corners must be taken by the closest member of the team the throw has been awarded to.

Pulis

Bobby Digital · # ? Jun 20, 2011 02:49

Paperhouse posted:

Changes to improve football?

1 point for a home draw.
2 points for an away draw.
3 points for the win.

The Goal keeper cannot handle ANY form of pass/header back, unless its a save.

It doesnt matter when the foul happens, be it first minute or the last, if its a yellow card offence, a yellow card should be given.

The game should not be stopped for goal keeper injuries, the goal keeper must removed from the field of play and an outfield player play in goal, and the goal keeper cannot return to the field until the ball goes out of play.

Similarly, injured players who require treatment cannot return to the pitch until the ball goes out of play and the referee lets them back on.

Substitutions cannot be made in injury time under any circumstances.

Throw ins/corners must be taken by the closest member of the team the throw has been awarded to.

and a load of other stuff.

Jesus, I was about to reply to this until I remembered which thread I was in. :psyduck:

Voluspa · # ? Jun 20, 2011 23:37

someyank posted:

When Soccer scarves pop up among Soccer fans in MLS stadiums, they seem pretentious and out of place. It seems like American Soccer fans are trying too hard to be something they're not. Soccer in the U.S. is played mainly in the spring and summer months. It is not played in winter months when scarves would be most necessary to keep warm.

Why couldn't MLS or U.S. Soccer clubs/people come up with something else to showcase that would be more authentic to Americans? How about socks, since the Summer months get hot and most people are wearing shorts, why don't fans get a pair of their team's socks to strut around in so others take notice of who their team is. Fans have pride for their teams and want to show their support, but people who bring scarves to games are like mice/sheep. There is no common sense in wearing a scarf or bringing one if the temperature does not fit the occasion.

Soccer scarves send the wrong message to U.S. sports fans who may want to give Soccer more of its spectator time. It is one more item that feels foreign and unfamiliar.

eh, I gue...

sameyank posted:

FC should not be associated with any MLS nickname. Too many sports fans don't know what it stands for and it makes them feel further separated from Soccer than is really the case. Reality is that there is not a big divide between U.S. sports fans and Soccer. Everyone is familiar with the game.

MLS will never achieve the success they desire until the average everyday Joe Sixpack Sports fan understands what is going on in their game. There is a lot to overcome, but rather than making it easier for them, some MLS teams decided on foreign names that are not consistent with U.S. lexicon

Many nicknames of MLS franchises and words used to describe basic tactics of the sport are articulated without consideration of Joe Sixpack Sportsfan. There is an air of snobbishness exuding from MLS that has not been addressed by the media. Instead of having names that make sense and talking about the game as Americans would, fans must jump through hoops to understand. Its like saying, we don't value you as a sports fan unless you learn us.

From the beginning, MLS should have required franchise names to be recognizable to all sports fans. Toronto FC, Sporting KC, Chivas USA, FC Dallas, Seattle Sounders FC, Real Salt Lake, Vancouver Whitecaps FC are unnecessary names.

FC at the end of the Seattle and Vancouver nicknames is a pretentious offering to the Soccer purists in order that they buy into the brand. Both Dallas and Toronto win the prize for the most unoriginal way to attract Soccer purists. The others are ridiculous marketing ideas to Soccer purists that make their brand much harder for sports fans to get to know.

There are some outstanding MLS nicknames that have been able to transcend mainstream sports. The LA Galaxy and DC United (hopefully, United is not a direct steal from Manchester-but was chosen because of nation's capital related to the U in USA) are easy flowing and have a ring to them. DC is the only Washington sports franchise of the 5, including football, basket, base and hockey to use DC as their moniker.

Teams should remove FC and accept themselves for what they are, not Football Clubs nor Futbol Clubs. Also, the others that chose foreign names should consider renaming themselves to accomodate sports fans who may want to get to know them better. U.S. pro Soccer teams don't need to replace the FC with SC as has been done with several minor league teams. Soccer Club is just as unnecessary, a little less disrespectful to U.S. sports fans, but nevertheless, unnecessary.

An original, artful nickname is just fine. Any decent American effort will do.

Ninpo · # ? Jun 21, 2011 00:12

Voluspa posted:

eh, I gue...

Holy jesustitty christ....

My first thought about the scarves was "but they're always good for waving around your head"...I just...I don't even...

Adbot · # ? May 14, 2024 23:10

Voluspa · # ? Jun 21, 2011 00:29

Ninpo posted:

Holy jesustitty christ....

My first thought about the scarves was "but they're always good for waving around your head"...I just...I don't even...

It is the gift that keeps on giving! :suicide:

sameyank posted:

This past Saturday, May 7th, saw a disgraceful output of goals scored. Eight goals for 7 games played, including 3 matches with double-bagels. That is pitiful and not going to help convince sports fans of Soccer's brilliance.

MLS has been successful at pulling more fans to the Soccer parks, but has not been able to pull decent TV ratings. Will this be pro club Soccer's Modus Operandi for the U.S.? If so, this reputation may be on par with hockey's reputation as wonderful to see live, but awful to watch on television.

If people are not watching Soccer on television because there's not enough scoring, it's probably only so long before those attending live decide to stop going. If you can't go to a game and see beautiful goals, than what's the point of going? A 1-0 game can be wonderful to watch, but it shouldn't be the norm.

The Soccer supporter groups won't give up. They'll be there rain or shine. But, many in these groups are not there for the Soccer as much as they are there to feel a sense of belonging to something. They probably shouldn't be counted on to provide accurate feedback for how a double-bagel game feels as a sports fan.

There was one match that stood out on Saturday. With the three most well-known players of MLS on the field at the same time, Henry, Donovan and Beckham, play was better than average. There were plenty of runs from both squads and a few highlights worth seeing. But still, only two goals were scored.

So far there has been 176 goals in 74 games played in the 2011 season of MLS. Average scoring is 2.38 goals per game, quite a ways from even a 2-1 score.

The ideal average score that would surely engage more American sports fans would be 4-3. This average would mean more highlights. Of course, it means more goals. Generally, though, it would also mean more shots, more saves and more hits on posts and crossbars. Plainly put, you can expect more action and more comebacks.

0-0 games and 1-0 games can be thrillers, but too many of them can drain even the most ardent of Soccer supporters. To guarantee maximum mainstream success with U.S. sports fans, low scoring and uneventful games have to become the exception, not the norm.