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GhostBoy
Aug 7, 2010

Baldbeard posted:

This is going to be a reach, but I remember playing an original game boy game as a kid that was way too hard and had the worst music I had ever heard. It's medieval/fantasy setting. I think you walk around through screens Zelda style, and periodically an evil enemy player would attack you. I think the enemy players also represented a few different classes, but I just remember the 'dark knights', and it being impossibly hard for my child game abilities.

It's all hazy, but I want to say the premise was like good soldiers vs evil soldiers in a medieval country side?

The music still haunts me.

Edit: gently caress me. I also remember good cheese and bad cheese you could find on the ground.
The fascination with cheese leads me to suggest one of the Dragon Quest (or Dragon Warrior if you are in North America) games. The 8th installment had a a whole alchemy system devoted to cheese, and I know some of the earlier games came out for Gameboy Color at least. Number III for one, which also had a party system where you could swap party members around at taverns.

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Baldbeard
Mar 26, 2011

I can't believe how long I just spent googling this, but I actually found it. The game was called Kingdom Crusade. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PI4O2US6TPk
Watch the beginning of that video and check out how many tutorial screens there are before you can play the game.


I must have been 6 years old trying to play this game with in-depth unit types and terrain strengths haha. No wonder I thought it was impossible.

Raar_Im_A_Dinosaur
Mar 16, 2006

GOOD LUCK!!
Man this one is a shot in the dark... I remember playing this adventure game at a computer show, and the only thing I can remember is making a raft out of reeds and logs and facing this hillbilly who goes on some monologue while drinking moonshine, and then ends it by saying, "you're already dead! " and taking out a gun. Anyone?

Sizone
Sep 13, 2007

by LadyAmbien
Man, this one is also a shot in the dark.

It's Macintosh shareware or freeware. It came out....'93-'96. It's a SHMUP, weirdest thing is that it had a gay theme, you were a guy trying to rescue your boyfriend. Your aircraft shot, I think, condoms. Either the pilot's name, or his boyfriend's name was Fubar. In fact, I could swear that the name of the game was Fubar or FUBAR or F.U.B.A.R. but that only turns up something that isn't the game I'm thinking of.

Veev
Oct 21, 2010

K is for kid.
A guy or gal just like you.
Dont be in such a hurry to grow up, since there's nothin' a kid can't do.
I barely remember this game I only rented once, but I remember parts of it so vividly it's been bothering me lately.

There was this game where you start out as this dark skinned demon dude who everyone shits on because he didn't have wings or something? He had a girlfriend that could fly and was a party member, and then halfway through the dude becomes king and that's as far as I ever got. It was grid based combat JRPG, but it was all in 3d. I think it was for the ps2, but maybe for the Gamecube?

boof
Jun 3, 2001

Raar_Im_A_Dinosaur posted:

Man this one is a shot in the dark... I remember playing this adventure game at a computer show, and the only thing I can remember is making a raft out of reeds and logs and facing this hillbilly who goes on some monologue while drinking moonshine, and then ends it by saying, "you're already dead! " and taking out a gun. Anyone?

You're not thinking of Return to Zork possibly? You have to get a hillbilly drunk by engaging in a drinking game which ends with him saying "and they're all dead" (link shows a clip).

Raar_Im_A_Dinosaur
Mar 16, 2006

GOOD LUCK!!

boof posted:

You're not thinking of Return to Zork possibly? You have to get a hillbilly drunk by engaging in a drinking game which ends with him saying "and they're all dead" (link shows a clip).

This whole time, "Want some rye, course ya do!" was from the game that has haunted me for years?! REALLY?! GODDAMNIT RAAR YOU ARE SO DUMB.

Yes that's it thank you.

Isurion
Jul 28, 2007
This game has been bugging me forever. I think it came with my mom's clamshell ibook. It was a medieval strategy game where you assigned peasants to do things by, I think, clicking and dragging them. There was also warfare I think but it's hazy. I dont think it had any fantasy elements like orcs or wizards

scamtank
Feb 24, 2011

my desire to just be a FUCKING IDIOT all day long is rapidly overtaking my ability to FUNCTION

i suspect that means i'm MENTALLY ILL


Isurion posted:

This game has been bugging me forever. I think it came with my mom's clamshell ibook. It was a medieval strategy game where you assigned peasants to do things by, I think, clicking and dragging them. There was also warfare I think but it's hazy. I dont think it had any fantasy elements like orcs or wizards

Lords of the Realm 1/2, maybe?

Isurion
Jul 28, 2007

scamtank posted:

Lords of the Realm 1/2, maybe?

Yeah it's Lords of the Realm 2.

Thanks!

Imapanda
Sep 12, 2008

Majoris Felidae Peditum
Alright, I'll give this a shot.


Back in around 2004ish I used to always buy video game magazines that came with the little demo CDs. One of the games on a CD had you playing as a character who rode on a dragon above this MASSIVE landscape wrecking poo poo up, you could land the dragon and fight dudes on the foot and take their poo poo. I remember it had a lot of RPG aspects and I was really surprised at how open the landscape was.

I just remember exploring the world on foot or flying the dragon to defeat enemies being the features. I'm sorry this is kind of vague but I hardly remember much of it. Any clue to what this may be?

Pablo Nergigante
Apr 16, 2002

Imapanda posted:

Alright, I'll give this a shot.


Back in around 2004ish I used to always buy video game magazines that came with the little demo CDs. One of the games on a CD had you playing as a character who rode on a dragon above this MASSIVE landscape wrecking poo poo up, you could land the dragon and fight dudes on the foot and take their poo poo. I remember it had a lot of RPG aspects and I was really surprised at how open the landscape was.

I just remember exploring the world on foot or flying the dragon to defeat enemies being the features. I'm sorry this is kind of vague but I hardly remember much of it. Any clue to what this may be?
Sounds like Drakengard

Imapanda
Sep 12, 2008

Majoris Felidae Peditum

Pablo Gigante posted:

Sounds like Drakengard


No, I don't think so. It wasn't a JRPG, it was more western and 'technical' than that.

duckfarts
Jul 2, 2010

~ shameful ~





Soiled Meat

Imapanda posted:

No, I don't think so. It wasn't a JRPG, it was more western and 'technical' than that.
Drakan, though don't know about the RPG bits - can you be more descriptive on that?

ponzicar
Mar 17, 2008

Imapanda posted:

Alright, I'll give this a shot.


Back in around 2004ish I used to always buy video game magazines that came with the little demo CDs. One of the games on a CD had you playing as a character who rode on a dragon above this MASSIVE landscape wrecking poo poo up, you could land the dragon and fight dudes on the foot and take their poo poo. I remember it had a lot of RPG aspects and I was really surprised at how open the landscape was.

I just remember exploring the world on foot or flying the dragon to defeat enemies being the features. I'm sorry this is kind of vague but I hardly remember much of it. Any clue to what this may be?

Savage Skies is another dragon riding game from this time period.

The Joe Man
Apr 7, 2007

Flirting With Apathetic Waitresses Since 1984

Imapanda posted:

Alright, I'll give this a shot.


Back in around 2004ish I used to always buy video game magazines that came with the little demo CDs. One of the games on a CD had you playing as a character who rode on a dragon above this MASSIVE landscape wrecking poo poo up, you could land the dragon and fight dudes on the foot and take their poo poo. I remember it had a lot of RPG aspects and I was really surprised at how open the landscape was.

I just remember exploring the world on foot or flying the dragon to defeat enemies being the features. I'm sorry this is kind of vague but I hardly remember much of it. Any clue to what this may be?

What system?? Isometric 2D, 3D???


Comedy answer: http://www.mobygames.com/game/dragon-riders-chronicles-of-pern

The Joe Man fucked around with this message at 06:42 on Oct 3, 2011

Neito
Feb 18, 2009

😌Finally, an avatar the describes my love of tech❤️‍💻, my love of anime💖🎎, and why I'll never see a real girl 🙆‍♀️naked😭.

So, I only ever read about this game, never actually played it, so I'm going off of a memory of a review here.

It was a game kinda like Postal (isometric run-and-gun game with a twisted sense of humor and crazy late-90s levels of video game violence) set in a dystopian cyberpunk future. You were some variety of sexy chick, and you were being blackmailed by what I assume to be the bad guy because he lined your gut with plastic explosives and could remotely detonate them. I vaguely remember one of the enemies being knife-wielding dolls, or maybe they were actual toddlers.

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

Neito posted:

So, I only ever read about this game, never actually played it, so I'm going off of a memory of a review here.

It was a game kinda like Postal (isometric run-and-gun game with a twisted sense of humor and crazy late-90s levels of video game violence) set in a dystopian cyberpunk future. You were some variety of sexy chick, and you were being blackmailed by what I assume to be the bad guy because he lined your gut with plastic explosives and could remotely detonate them. I vaguely remember one of the enemies being knife-wielding dolls, or maybe they were actual toddlers.

This sounds like an old demo I played. It was for the PC and the game was called Meat Puppet. It's incredibly obscure and I couldn't find any videos of it in action.

Here's a review from Gamespot.

http://www.gamespot.com/pc/action/meatpuppet/review.html?tag=summary%3Bread-review

cmndstab
May 20, 2006

Huge Internet Celebrity!
Huh, for old time's sake I was reading through an old PC Gaming magazine from the mid-late 90s and just happened to read a review of Meat Puppet just last night!

It sounded like a Crusader: No Remorse clone but with a decent storyline.

Funkmaster General
Sep 13, 2008

Hey, man, I distinctly remember this being an episode of Spongebob. :colbert:

Imapanda posted:

No, I don't think so. It wasn't a JRPG, it was more western and 'technical' than that.

Drakengard wasn't a JRPG...

Neito
Feb 18, 2009

😌Finally, an avatar the describes my love of tech❤️‍💻, my love of anime💖🎎, and why I'll never see a real girl 🙆‍♀️naked😭.

Wamdoodle posted:

This sounds like an old demo I played. It was for the PC and the game was called Meat Puppet. It's incredibly obscure and I couldn't find any videos of it in action.

Here's a review from Gamespot.

http://www.gamespot.com/pc/action/meatpuppet/review.html?tag=summary%3Bread-review

I'm 99% sure that's right, and the remaining 1% is probably my brain corrupting the history of the thing. Thanks!

DarthBlingBling
Apr 19, 2004

These were also dark times for gamers as we were shunned by others for being geeky or nerdy and computer games were seen as Childs play things, during these dark ages the whispers began circulating about a 3D space combat game called Elite

- CMDR Bald Man In A Box
Not much info sorry. It was a haunted game on the Atari ST (and probably others) all I can remember it had Frankenstein and Dracula as enemies and the BGM was a pretty well known horror track.

Figured it out Horror Zombies from the Crypt spoilered for those who still seek the thrill of the challenge!

DarthBlingBling fucked around with this message at 21:56 on Oct 7, 2011

Snackmar
Feb 23, 2005

I'M PROGRAMMED TO LOVE THIS CHOCOLATY CAKE... MY CIRCUITS LIGHT UP FOR THAT FUDGY ICING.
Just thought I'd mention this since it's come up as "what is the name of this game??" a few times: Little Big Adventure (aka Relentless: Twinsen's Adventure) is up on GOG now: http://www.gog.com/en/gamecard/little_big_adventure

Urban Achiever
Mar 29, 2005

techknight posted:

Just thought I'd mention this since it's come up as "what is the name of this game??" a few times: Little Big Adventure (aka Relentless: Twinsen's Adventure) is up on GOG now: http://www.gog.com/en/gamecard/little_big_adventure
Oh gently caress yeah! These two games own such a soft spot in my heart. Although I don't think I ever want to play them again because of how perfect I remember them.

Morpheus
Apr 18, 2008

My favourite little monsters
So reading through the LP of King of Dragon Pass has reminded me of a game I played in high school (around 2000, I suppose). I don't remember much of it, but I'm pretty sure it was an RPG, and it definitely had Norse cultural roots, in that there were things like Jarls in it (that's really the only word I can remember). I'm pretty sure it had an isometric view.

The Joe Man
Apr 7, 2007

Flirting With Apathetic Waitresses Since 1984

Morpheus posted:

So reading through the LP of King of Dragon Pass has reminded me of a game I played in high school (around 2000, I suppose). I don't remember much of it, but I'm pretty sure it was an RPG, and it definitely had Norse cultural roots, in that there were things like Jarls in it (that's really the only word I can remember). I'm pretty sure it had an isometric view.

My best guess would be Darklands but that's probably way too early. Check out this list and see if anything looks familiar: http://www.mobygames.com/game-group/mythology-norse-germanic

baka kaba
Jul 19, 2003

PLEASE ASK ME, THE SELF-PROFESSED NO #1 PAUL CATTERMOLE FAN IN THE SOMETHING AWFUL S-CLUB 7 MEGATHREAD, TO NAME A SINGLE SONG BY HIS EXCELLENT NU-METAL SIDE PROJECT, SKUA, AND IF I CAN'T PLEASE TELL ME TO
EAT SHIT

Morpheus posted:

So reading through the LP of King of Dragon Pass has reminded me of a game I played in high school (around 2000, I suppose). I don't remember much of it, but I'm pretty sure it was an RPG, and it definitely had Norse cultural roots, in that there were things like Jarls in it (that's really the only word I can remember). I'm pretty sure it had an isometric view.

Heimdall?

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


Morpheus posted:

So reading through the LP of King of Dragon Pass has reminded me of a game I played in high school (around 2000, I suppose). I don't remember much of it, but I'm pretty sure it was an RPG, and it definitely had Norse cultural roots, in that there were things like Jarls in it (that's really the only word I can remember). I'm pretty sure it had an isometric view.

Celtic Tales? It was '95-ish, though.

Morpheus
Apr 18, 2008

My favourite little monsters
I'm pretty certain it was Valhalla Chronicles, but I'm not certain. My memories are extremely vague.

Kind of makes me want to play Heimdall 2 again though.

Zeether
Aug 26, 2011

I was watching The Wizard and at one point Jimmy (the kid who's good at video games) was playing some racing game. It looked a bit like Night Striker crossed with Rad Racer or Outrun. Does anyone know what it was called? They mentioned F-1 Dream at some point so I thought it was that, but it had a Ferrari-esque car in it.

Pablo Nergigante
Apr 16, 2002

Zeether posted:

I was watching The Wizard and at one point Jimmy (the kid who's good at video games) was playing some racing game. It looked a bit like Night Striker crossed with Rad Racer or Outrun. Does anyone know what it was called? They mentioned F-1 Dream at some point so I thought it was that, but it had a Ferrari-esque car in it.
He plays Rad Racer with the Power Glove, are you just thinking of that?

Zeether
Aug 26, 2011

Pablo Gigante posted:

He plays Rad Racer with the Power Glove, are you just thinking of that?
No, it was a different game. (Lucas was the Power Glove guy) The graphics definitely weren't the same as Rad Racer, in fact the game looked like some late 80's arcade game with sprite scaling and such. I thought it was Night Striker at first because of the font onscreen, but then I saw it in another shot and it was a game with some car that looked like a cross between a Ferrari and a Mark 3 Toyota Supra.

e: Think I found it, it's called Top Speed. The car seems to be an RX-7 FC3S and not either of the cars I'm talking about.

Zeether fucked around with this message at 22:48 on Oct 15, 2011

simplefish
Mar 28, 2011

So long, and thanks for all the fish gallbladdΣrs!


In the present day, you're presented with a top-down grid map of the pyramids around Giza. You choose a site, choose your tools, and dig. You can damage or break artefacts if you use the spade instead of the brush, for instance.

You can find pewter bowls, clay pots(?), and strange stones with heiroglyphics on them. The first one you find is something like Djibouti -- only not Djbouti, because that's a place. Upon digging it up, you have no idea what it is.

Once you've dug up the stone, you go back in time to Ancient Egypt, and you have to run around and find out what the stone is and says. I seem to remember that you spawn in a farm house with a woman saying her husband is out working, and for some reason you have to take an Adze from the house.

At the end of the puzzler/history lesson, it turns out that the stone has a pharoah's name on it, and you return to the present, to begin again.

Played it circa 1995, up to 1999. I don't recall it being famous in any way.

Any ideas, goons?

chairface
Oct 28, 2007

No matter what you believe, I don't believe in you.

simplefish posted:

In the present day, you're presented with a top-down grid map of the pyramids around Giza. You choose a site, choose your tools, and dig. You can damage or break artefacts if you use the spade instead of the brush, for instance.

You can find pewter bowls, clay pots(?), and strange stones with heiroglyphics on them. The first one you find is something like Djibouti -- only not Djbouti, because that's a place. Upon digging it up, you have no idea what it is.

Once you've dug up the stone, you go back in time to Ancient Egypt, and you have to run around and find out what the stone is and says. I seem to remember that you spawn in a farm house with a woman saying her husband is out working, and for some reason you have to take an Adze from the house.

At the end of the puzzler/history lesson, it turns out that the stone has a pharoah's name on it, and you return to the present, to begin again.

Played it circa 1995, up to 1999. I don't recall it being famous in any way.

Any ideas, goons?

Not quite helping you find the game, but the thing that was sorta like "Djibouti" was it maybe Djedfreh?

simplefish
Mar 28, 2011

So long, and thanks for all the fish gallbladdΣrs!


chairface posted:

Not quite helping you find the game, but the thing that was sorta like "Djibouti" was it maybe Djedfreh?

Yes! By which I mean Probably! I remember now, I always just used to prononuce it "D-jeffrey".

HoldYourFire
Oct 16, 2006

What's the time? It's DEFCON 1!

simplefish posted:

In the present day, you're presented with a top-down grid map of the pyramids around Giza. You choose a site, choose your tools, and dig. You can damage or break artefacts if you use the spade instead of the brush, for instance.

You can find pewter bowls, clay pots(?), and strange stones with heiroglyphics on them. The first one you find is something like Djibouti -- only not Djbouti, because that's a place. Upon digging it up, you have no idea what it is.

Once you've dug up the stone, you go back in time to Ancient Egypt, and you have to run around and find out what the stone is and says. I seem to remember that you spawn in a farm house with a woman saying her husband is out working, and for some reason you have to take an Adze from the house.

At the end of the puzzler/history lesson, it turns out that the stone has a pharoah's name on it, and you return to the present, to begin again.

Played it circa 1995, up to 1999. I don't recall it being famous in any way.

Any ideas, goons?

Journeyman Project 2 or 3?

Edit: Actually, I'm not sure.

HoldYourFire fucked around with this message at 23:20 on Oct 16, 2011

Hip Gelatinous Cube
May 30, 2001

what up
Three games:

-An old arcade game. Late 80s/early 90s, I'd say. A side-scroller where you control a space dude in a futuristic setting. Jumpsuits potentially involved. By side-scroller I don''t mean "shooter", but rather something close to Flashback, although much more simplistic. You can jump, crouch. You have a laser gun. You can hide behind boxes, I think. Enemies come through sliding doors. I think your goal is to rescue a princess or something equally original. I remember it being fairly colourful.

-PC game, mid 90s. Halfway between side scrolling shooter and Metroid on crack. Sci-fi, once again. Very, very dark atmosphere, and a shitload of aliens attacking you. Control your character with the keyboard, aim and shoot with a mouse. I believe there were multiple weapons and each level felt pretty big. May have taken place inside a spaceship. Was released as a shareware.

-PC game, mid 90s. Shooter where you pilot a ship, FPS-like view. Futuristic. Massive maps. Way more arcadey than something like Tie Fighter. Wasn't in space, either, but on the surface of a planet. I remember it feeling like Descent except outside and being able to fly pretty much anywhere. A shareware, once again. I vaguely remember the words "nova" or "orbit", but I may be terribly wrong on that one.

Hip Gelatinous Cube fucked around with this message at 16:14 on Oct 19, 2011

scamtank
Feb 24, 2011

my desire to just be a FUCKING IDIOT all day long is rapidly overtaking my ability to FUNCTION

i suspect that means i'm MENTALLY ILL


Hip Gelatinous Cube posted:

-PC game, mid 90s. Halfway between side scrolling shooter and Metroid on crack. Sci-fi, once again. Very, very dark atmosphere, and a shitload of aliens attacking you. Control your character with the keyboard, aim and shoot with a mouse. I believe there were multiple weapons and each level felt pretty big. May have taken place inside a spaceship. Was released as a shareware.

If this isn't Abuse, I don't know anything anymore.

Hip Gelatinous Cube posted:

-PC game, mid 90s. Shooter where you pilot a ship, FPS-like view. Futuristic. Massive maps. Way more arcadey than something like Tie Fighter. Wasn't in space, either, but on the surface of a planet. I remember it feeling like Descent except outside and being able to fly pretty much anywhere. A shareware, once again. I vaguely remember the words "nova" or "orbit", but I may be terribly wrong on that one.

Terminal Velocity, perhaps?

Pablo Nergigante
Apr 16, 2002

Hip Gelatinous Cube posted:

Three games:

-An old arcade game. Late 80s/early 90s, I'd say. A side-scroller where you control a space dude in a futuristic setting. Jumpsuits potentially involved. By side-scroller I don''t mean "shooter", but rather something close to Flashback, although much more simplistic. You can jump, crouch. You have a laser gun. You can hide behind boxes, I think. Enemies come through sliding doors. I think your goal is to rescue a princess or something equally original. I remember it being fairly colourful.
This kinda sounds like Rolling Thunder conflated with something else. I may be wrong though!

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Hip Gelatinous Cube
May 30, 2001

what up

scamtank posted:

If this isn't Abuse, I don't know anything anymore.


Terminal Velocity, perhaps?

Pablo Gigante posted:

This kinda sounds like Rolling Thunder conflated with something else. I may be wrong though!

Holy poo poo that was quick, and correct on all three counts. Thank you guys so much.

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