Legal Questions: do not communicate with the demon at all except through your genie

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Choadmaster: Oct 7, 2004; I don't care how snug they fit, you're nuts!

California Lemon Law question.

My friend purchased a computer from Apple three and a half months ago, and it's been crashing, refusing to wake from sleep, randomly shutting down, etc. the entire time. It's been in for repair at least three times, and they've failed to fix the problems. They know for a fact the problems are real, because he's been bringing the computer into the store when the problems happen so they can see them in person. However, when they take the computer in for repair, they are "unable to find the problem" and then simply reinstall the OS, which doesn't do poo poo to fix it.

More details if you care in the Mac Hardware thread here and here.

They're refusing to replace the machine, despite multiple repair attempts, because they can't find the problem (despite the fact that they acknowledge there IS a problem). California's Lemon Law should cover this situation, should it not? The biggest question I have here is whether we've exceeded the "reasonable number of repairs" stipulated by the law (since that is left vague and depends on the product in question). I'd appreciate any info/not-legal-advice anyone might have on this type of situation.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 03:05

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# ? May 15, 2024 10:46

BigHead: Jul 25, 2003; Huh?; Nap Ghost

a shameful boehner posted:

Should I have them contact an attorney regarding an illegally issued notice of foreclosure? If that's the route they take, what kind of attorney? I was thinking real estate law, but I'm unsure.

Call your local bar office, they're refer them to an attorney.

Also, I dealt with foreclosures in my past job, including illegal foreclosures. Banks are the absolute epitome of trundling bureaucracies that do not give one poo poo about the little guy. I've seen people foreclosed on when they paid cash in full for their house to a different bank. There is a pretty good shot that even if a judge orders the bank to not foreclose, the house will still be foreclosed. A wrongful foreclosure is a terrifying, terrifying thing that you absolutely need an attorney for.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 03:07

ubermarcus: Mar 17, 2009

I have a question regarding a glitch in an online store.
One night after quite a few beers (go go better judgement!) I noticed that an online store I've shopped at a few times had some sort of glitch where every item was suddenly listed at $0. I figure I'd add a few things to my cart and see how I go, and surely enough I completele my transaction for a total of $0. The statement emailed to me also had a total of $0 on it.
Today, after recieving my order, I'm checking my bank acount only to find that I've been charged the full amount anyway. Not seeing the prices on their site at the time, I've actually bought close to $500 worth of crap!
Now I realise it was probably a slightly dick move to buy stuff for free from a store obviously having technical difficulties, but on the other hand I have a purchase history and emailed invoice telling me I've just spent $0, shouldn't I be entitled to that price then? As rude as it is, but sucks to be them?

# ? Oct 12, 2011 07:35

John McCain: Jan 29, 2009

You're almost never going to be entitled to reap the benefits of what is an obvious pricing mistake. Even without case law, "we won't sell you stuff at obviously erroneous prices" is a pretty standard feature of online shops' terms of use.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 07:46

Sonic Dude: May 6, 2009

Choadmaster posted:

California Lemon Law question.

My friend purchased a computer from Apple three and a half months ago, and it's been crashing, refusing to wake from sleep, randomly shutting down, etc. the entire time. It's been in for repair at least three times, and they've failed to fix the problems. They know for a fact the problems are real, because he's been bringing the computer into the store when the problems happen so they can see them in person. However, when they take the computer in for repair, they are "unable to find the problem" and then simply reinstall the OS, which doesn't do poo poo to fix it.

More details if you care in the Mac Hardware thread here and here.

They're refusing to replace the machine, despite multiple repair attempts, because they can't find the problem (despite the fact that they acknowledge there IS a problem). California's Lemon Law should cover this situation, should it not? The biggest question I have here is whether we've exceeded the "reasonable number of repairs" stipulated by the law (since that is left vague and depends on the product in question). I'd appreciate any info/not-legal-advice anyone might have on this type of situation.

Not a lawyer, just an ex-employee:

Lawyering up against Apple probably won't have the intended outcome you desire; it absolutely never did in any of the situations I encountered while I was there. If you don't want to handle things with Apple normally, the BBB or state attorney general's office usually gets a response from them. That's probably going to be closer to what you want, rather than finding a lawyer to go up against the pack of monstrously-successful lawyers Apple has at their disposal, and being torn to shreds on a technicality.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 13:42

Choadmaster: Oct 7, 2004; I don't care how snug they fit, you're nuts!

Wasn't planning on lawyering up; just wanted to make sure I had my facts straight and accurate before I bring up the Lemon Law with the Customer Relations lady. According to others in the Mac Hardware thread, just mentioning the lemon law tends to cause businesses to cave. Unfortunately, 99.9% of the info about the lemon law I can find online pertains to vehicles.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 18:19

chemosh6969

Jul 3, 2004

code:
cat /dev/null > /etc/professionalism

_{_{I am in fact a massive asswagon.

Do not let me touch computer.}}

empiricus posted:

At my college (NY), they handle my student account, so any surplus from federal loans goes to my student account. From that I can request up to $2000 of my remaining balance to be released to me, but only $2000 regardless of my actual balance, and I can only make 1 request every 60 days. Is it legal for them to be keeping my money away from me for no apparent reason?

Where's I'm at, you get any credit refunded to you.

My answer would be to start off by talking to someone at the school that knows the reasons for that and also read all your loan paperwork in case it talks about that.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 18:50

nm: Jan 28, 2008; "I saw Minos the Space Judge holding a golden sceptre and passing sentence upon the Martians. There he presided, and around him the noble Space Prosecutors sought the firm justice of space law."

ubermarcus posted:

I have a question regarding a glitch in an online store.
One night after quite a few beers (go go better judgement!) I noticed that an online store I've shopped at a few times had some sort of glitch where every item was suddenly listed at $0. I figure I'd add a few things to my cart and see how I go, and surely enough I completele my transaction for a total of $0. The statement emailed to me also had a total of $0 on it.
Today, after recieving my order, I'm checking my bank acount only to find that I've been charged the full amount anyway. Not seeing the prices on their site at the time, I've actually bought close to $500 worth of crap!
Now I realise it was probably a slightly dick move to buy stuff for free from a store obviously having technical difficulties, but on the other hand I have a purchase history and emailed invoice telling me I've just spent $0, shouldn't I be entitled to that price then? As rude as it is, but sucks to be them?

You get your money back.
They keep the stuff.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 18:51

Dave Inc.: Nov 26, 2007; Let's have a drink!

I'm sure this has been asked a bunch of times in the thread, so sorry to ask for it again--I'm just not feeling tip top.

My wife and I want to get a divorce. We're on very good terms and believe we can do it pro se since we have very straight forward assets and no children. I'm just wondering if anyone can give me a quick sum up of how the process goes*--I've looked at a bunch of sites but I feel like there's a block and I'm missing important steps in the process or something.

* - i.e. "you do this" "court does that" "you do this" "court does that" etc.

Edit: I'm in Cuyahoga County, Ohio.

Dave Inc. fucked around with this message at 19:38 on Oct 12, 2011

# ? Oct 12, 2011 19:22

Alchenar: Apr 9, 2008

Dave Inc. posted:

I'm sure this has been asked a bunch of times in the thread, so sorry to ask for it again--I'm just not feeling tip top.

My wife and I want to get a divorce. We're on very good terms and believe we can do it pro se since we have very straight forward assets and no children. I'm just wondering if anyone can give me a quick sum up of how the process goes*--I've looked at a bunch of sites but I feel like there's a block and I'm missing important steps in the process or something.

* - i.e. "you do this" "court does that" "you do this" "court does that" etc.

Where do you live?

# ? Oct 12, 2011 19:30

Dave Inc.: Nov 26, 2007; Let's have a drink!

Alchenar posted:

Where do you live?

Argh, sorry. Edited my post.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 19:38

Queen Elizatits: May 3, 2005; Haven't you heard?
MARATHONS ARE HARD

Back in March I took my exlandlords to small claims court for our security deposit. I won the case, didn't hear anything from them and they didn't file any additional paperwork. I went through the process of garnishing his wages. He is a teacher in California. His employer was served with the wage garnishment September 7th and returned it to the sheriffs office September 16th. He is paid monthly.
I haven't received any payment or any other notice. I was hoping people with more experience in this sort of thing could give me an idea of how long it usually takes after an employer receives a wage garnishment notice until it actually happens.

# ? Oct 12, 2011 20:35

Solomon Grundy: Feb 10, 2007; Born on a Monday

Dave Inc. posted:

I'm sure this has been asked a bunch of times in the thread, so sorry to ask for it again--I'm just not feeling tip top.

My wife and I want to get a divorce. We're on very good terms and believe we can do it pro se since we have very straight forward assets and no children. I'm just wondering if anyone can give me a quick sum up of how the process goes*--I've looked at a bunch of sites but I feel like there's a block and I'm missing important steps in the process or something.

* - i.e. "you do this" "court does that" "you do this" "court does that" etc.

Edit: I'm in Cuyahoga County, Ohio.

Start here:

http://domestic.cuyahogacounty.us/en-US/general-information.aspx

If you have further questions, go to one of these free clinics:

http://lasclev.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/10-11-2011-free-clinics.pdf

# ? Oct 13, 2011 17:42

NewcastleBrown: Mar 15, 2004; The One and Only

Is this as much bullshit as it looks to me?

If it matters the "Recipient" lives in California and the company (an LLC) seems to be based out of Nevada, though I'm pretty sure the person running it lives in CA as well.

I'm trying to decide if I should get militant about trying to stop someone from making what I imagine is a bad decision!

The instructions for signing require a witness (though it doesn't have to be notarized) and both the person signing and the witness are supposed to put their thumb-print over the printed version of their last name. Also, for whatever reason, men are supposed to do their thumb print with blue ink and women with red ink.

I've never signed an NDA outside of video game beta testing, so maybe this crap is normal but it sure looks fishy to me.

quote:

NON-DISCLOSURE
PRIVATE CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT
BETWEEN TWO PRIVATE PEOPLE
THIS IS NOT A PUBLIC DOCUMENT

1. This private agreement is between_________________, herein referred to as �Recipient� of confidential information, and [**Company Name**] and/or its subsidiaries or affiliates, officers, associates or agents, herein referred to as �Disclosing Party� of confidential information, hereinafter all jointly referred to as the "Parties"
2. The named parties above, in exercise of their God-given unalienable rights and claims, do hereby agree and consent, voluntarily and without distraint, to the following covenants, terms, stipulations and conditions. Each party agrees that upon autographing this agreement they are competent and understand the nature of this agreement; that neither is lawfully incompetent, a minor, or a legal person.
3. Both parties agree that neither will divulge any information verbally, in writing, by email, audio recording or any form of communication to anyone else within or outside of [**Company Name**].
4. �Confidential information" as used in this Agreement shall mean any and all information, ideas, current or future, or, material which is confidential and/or proprietary to Disclosing Party or one or more of Disclosing Party officers, associates or agents, subsidiaries or affiliates, or any and all other information designated as Confidential Information by Disclosing Party, whether or not owned or developed by Disclosing Party, which is not generally known by Recipient or any non-disclosing party, and of which the Recipient may obtain knowledge through or as a result of the relationship established hereunder with Disclosing Party, access to the Disclosing a Party premises, or communications with Disclosing Party officers, associates, attorneys, accountants, agents, consultants or independent contractors.
5. The Parties will not disclose any names, addresses, telephone numbers, facsimile, telex numbers, or email of any contact revealed by the Disclosing Party to the Recipient, and that each recognize such contacts of the respective Party or parties, and that they shall not enter into direct negotiation(s) or transaction(s) with such contacts revealed by the Disclosing Party.
6. Furthermore, this PRIVATE CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT is itself, a matter of privacy and confidentiality. There is no known legal requirement to divulge the contents of a private agreement made between two parties. The Constitution for the United States, Article 1, Section 10, prohibits any State from impairing the obligations of a contract.

7. This is the entire contract between the parties of this PRIVATE CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT and this contract and the covenants and conditions set forth between the identified parties herein may only be altered and accepted by the parties so bound upon reasonable notice. THIS IS NOT A PUBLIC DOCUMENT.
8. The Recipient represents, warrants, and agrees to pay to the Disclosing Party $250,000.00, two hundred fifty thousand U.S. dollars upon disclosure of any information from disclosing party within 10 days of disclosure.
9. If any of the provisions of this PRIVATE CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT are found to be unenforceable, the remainder shall be enforced as fully as possible and the unenforceable provision(s) shall be deemed modified to the limited extent required to permit enforcement of the contract as a whole.

WHEREFORE, the parties acknowledge that they have read and understand this contract and voluntarily accept the duties and obligations set forth herein. With full responsibility, under the laws of God, the undersigned do execute this agreement of their own free will act and know the terms and conditions therein and agree to abide by this PRIVATE CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT.

# ? Oct 13, 2011 23:12

gvibes: Jan 18, 2010; Leading us to the promised land (i.e., one tournament win in five years)

It is definitely shittily written in a number of different respects. What are your primary problems with the thing?

# ? Oct 14, 2011 00:30

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

I did not read it carefully but there does not appear to be any consideration. The liquidated damages clause at 8. is also laughable.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 00:31

NewcastleBrown: Mar 15, 2004; The One and Only

gvibes posted:

It is definitely shittily written in a number of different respects. What are your primary problems with the thing?

Shittily written legal documents are automatically suspect to me, I guess. I don't know legalese but this just looks like it was hacked together by someone who doesn't know what they're doing (and loves God!).

I'm mostly paranoid about it being some sort of setup to bait someone into breaking the NDA, I guess?

For a start, clause 3 states that neither party will share any information with anyone, even people within the company (note: it does not say "confidential information"). While I assume they meant to say confidential information I wouldn't want to pin $250k on that assumption. Also, if someone is dealing with your company, how does that work without any information sharing?

It just seems really vague and broad. "Confidential Information" is anything they decide it is, whether they have anything to do with it or not.

Hell, it looks like even discussing the fact that you signed the NDA is a violation of it, and they site the "Constitution for the United States" to show that the Government can shove it and stay out of their PRIVATE AGREEMENT.

euphronius posted:

I did not read it carefully but there does not appear to be any consideration. The liquidated damages clause at 8. is also laughable.

I'm not sure what this means. By no "consideration" do you mean there's nothing in it to worry about, or is "consideration" some standard part of an NDA that I don't know about?

What makes clause 8 laughable? As I stated I am infinitely uninformed about this sort of thing and would like to have something concrete to go on.

Sorry for my nitpicking, and thanks for putting up with my paranoia. If I should cool off about it then by all means tell me so!

Edit: Also: Blue ink for boys, red ink for girls! :psyduck:

NewcastleBrown fucked around with this message at 01:31 on Oct 14, 2011

# ? Oct 14, 2011 01:02

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

It claims it is a contract. IN a valid contract there has to be consideration. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Consideration

8 is laughable because i doubt it would ever be enforced by a court.

But I don't know anything about CA so who knows.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 01:06

Alaemon: Jan 4, 2009; Proctors are guardians of the sanctity and integrity of legal education, therefore they are responsible for the nourishment of the soul.

With the caveat that I know next to nothing about NDAs and not much more about anything in CA, it reads to me like something written by a tax protester.

The signature thing you mentioned is absurd, I can't envision a scenario in which that actually means anything.

Also I would like to know how the Company envisions enforcing a secret contract if it's not willing to disclose the contents to a court.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 01:49

C.C.C.P.: Aug 26, 2005; by Y Kant Ozma Post

I have a question regarding orders of protection. I am in Missouri. I do apologize if this is too verbose or I "shouldn't be posting this" (I will happily redact it, if so). I am rather panicked and need some advice. I have never had any sort of legal issues beyond a single parking citation. I have no idea what to do.

Also, hand to god, all of this is true as far as I am currently aware. The whole mess is confusing and weird and ridiculous and if something "seems off", I will try to elaborate as best I can, but believe you me, this "seems off" to me, too!

To give a VERY brief summary of my situation.

I was dating a girl for four years. We broke up in May of 2010. It was a crappy breakup (she was cheating) but wasn't extremely ugly by any means. She moved out. She was unable to get her name taken off our (brand new) lease as per her own conversations with the landlord. Not feeling extremely charitable, given the situation, I deferred to the landlords position of "welp, looks like you'll be paying half the rent until it's up!

". She was extremely bitter about this, but complied.

I have not seen her physically since the day she moved out. I have called her (and she me) once or twice since if something (rent-related, "hey I found this thing you left when you moved out, do you want it?"/"hey I took this thing of yours when I moved out. do you want it?", etc). We have emailed once or twice over similar issues if one or the other of us was at work and couldn't call regarding an issue. Contact gradually tapered off as the months passed.

The last time I emailed her was in June of this year. The lease she and I were on had ended in April (we had discussed that prior to it ending, and I decided to do a month-to-month extension that I alone was responsible for while looking for a new place). The reason I contacted her in June was because I had moved out and wanted to discuss some arrangement for splitting up the deposit with her. She never got back to me. I tried calling her, her number had been disconnected. "Whatever. Guess I'm keeping it, then!", I said to myself. That is literally the last time I gave her any sort of serious thought or consideration.

Now, at this point, let me recap:

*Haven't physically seen her since May 2010.
*Haven't emailed her since June of this year.
*Haven't talked to her on the phone since probably February of this year (to discuss the upcoming end of lease).
*I have no idea where she lives.
*I have no idea where she works.
*I have no idea what her new number is.
*I have no desire to know any of the above.
*I have no need or desire to contact her.
*I know her email address but have no reason to contact her and can probably reasonably show that I haven't since the "How do you want to split the deposit?" email back in June.

My problem: Apparently, I am about to be (but have not yet been) served with a temporary restraining order(!) and a subpoena to appear in court.

Of course, she was the one that filed it.

How I learned this: she apparently filed on October 3rd (and, not knowing my new address as I have had no contact with her sine my move and no reason to disclose my address to her), she put our OLD address (the one we had the co-lease at). The police tried to serve it there. No dice. Eventually, the police tried to serve it at my parents house (I've not lived there since college, years ago). My mom called me in a panic over it. The only details she was able to get from the police were that it was a restraining order and that my ex had requested it. No further details are known at this time. She "wanted to know what I wanted her to do". I told her, of course, to give the police my new address so they could serve it. I may think this is ridiculous and frivolous, but I'm not about to go all "gently caress THA PO-LICE" about this. This was all today. They have yet to serve.

My understanding, and why I feel okay posting all this, is that the temporary order doesn't even go into effect until it is served. Until that occurs, I'd like to get some advice regarding this situation, how to fight it, what to expect, etc.

Right, so a list of my questions (and feel free to add any sort of relevant information I may not be considering):

I am operating under the assumption that she is doing this to be vindictive or something. She IS a bit... unstable. This would not be out of character.

*Do I need a lawyer? I am assuming yes, but am just kinda wondering what the entire process is going to involve, I guess!

*How hard is it to get a restraining order? Is it basically "Go to court. Tell judge word of mouth reason for needing order without having to show evidence. Temporary order granted by default "just in case"?" Or would she have to show some kind of conclusive "proof" that she needed one?

*Depending on the former, assuming she did have to show evidence of some sort to even get a temporary order, what sort of evidence would she have to show? Can she retroactively do something like "Here's my phone record. As you can see, 7 months, 2 weeks and 5 days ago, he called me. I didn't want him to call me. It has been bothering me this entire time

"? Can she take evidence of me contacting her mooooooooooooonths ago and just subjectively say "Oh, well, I didn't want him contacting me those times" even though at the time, she did? How can I argue my case one way or the other here?

*I'm not around her anyway, have no means to be around or contact her, etc. Is there some sort of "I dispute the need for a restraining order, but will gladly continue to not contact her" defense I can use? I really don't want a frivolous restraining order on my record yet obviously have no problem not having anything to do with her, since that's what I've been doing this entire time anyway!

*This whole situation is goofy, so this bears asking: what if she is falsifying evidence? What if she simply registered *my name*@yahoo.com or some other free email address and had :airquote:

send her a bunch of inflammatory email or something? How do courts look at something like that? I mean, there is literally no way of proving who registered said email address, etc.

*What if she uses some other completely unprovable evidence? "He knows where I live! I'm scared!" "Uh, no, I don't know where you live. I literally have no idea." "YES YOU DO! I KNOW YOU DO!".

*I understand that the burden of proof is on her to show that she NEEDS a restraining order, but it also seems that a lot are given out "just in case". I mean, it'd suck if an abusive husband wormed his way out of one and murdered his wife. Generally, how hard is it to fight these sorts of things?

Please help, goons. It's late. I'm tired and freaked out. This has me all worried. Being accused of something you absolutely didn't do, MONTHS after any contact took place, is terrifying. :/

Thanks!

# ? Oct 14, 2011 03:22

the littlest prince: Sep 23, 2006

You should try to relax until you find out what this thing is all about.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 04:03

C.C.C.P.: Aug 26, 2005; by Y Kant Ozma Post

the littlest prince posted:

You should try to relax until you find out what this thing is all about.

I'm trying, I really am. :/ Based on her past behavior, and my absolute certainty that I didn't do ANYTHING warranting this (which, alas, won't hold up in court), I'm sure she's just doing it to be vindictive months later when it would be hard for me to really defend against anything.

I mean, if she has "harassing emails" sent after June (or even before then, as I was never even remotely harassing to her at any point), they were obviously faked, but how do I prove that? I could have just deleted the offending emails from my sent folder, as far as the court is concerned. If she brings in a phone bill from a year ago showing I called and was "harassing her" when in reality, we were probably discussing me finding some of her stuff she left or something, it's her word against mine again.

This entire thing is insanely frustrating and scary.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 05:10

blackmongoose: Mar 31, 2011; DARK INFERNO ROOK!

I like the part of the contract where each party agrees that neither is a legal person. Even assuming they were trying to say that both are natural persons (i.e. not corporations), it is meant to be between a corporation and a person :psyduck:

I'm not in any way familiar with California law or NDAs, and this isn't advice of any sort, but most of that seems like unenforceable nonsense to me

# ? Oct 14, 2011 06:41

zachol: Feb 13, 2009; Once per turn, you can Tribute 1 WATER monster you control (except this card) to Special Summon 1 WATER monster from your hand. The monster Special Summoned by this effect is destroyed if "Raging Eria" is removed from your side of the field.

quote:

Each party agrees that upon autographing this agreement they are competent and understand the nature of this agreement; that neither is lawfully incompetent, a minor, or a legal person.

Seriously what the hell.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 07:08

NewcastleBrown: Mar 15, 2004; The One and Only

blackmongoose posted:

I like the part of the contract where each party agrees that neither is a legal person. Even assuming they were trying to say that both are natural persons (i.e. not corporations), it is meant to be between a corporation and a person

I'm not in any way familiar with California law or NDAs, and this isn't advice of any sort, but most of that seems like unenforceable nonsense to me

The "legal person" struck me as odd as well. Wikipedia had something close enough that I accepted it is being OK, but the general tone of it seemed more in line with some sort of sovereign person sort of bullshit than an actual legal document.

As I literally know nothing about contract law or NDAs, I don't know if the bizarrity of the whole thing has any affect on its legal validity. If signing it will impart no enforceable legal requirements on the person I know who's planning to sign it, then whatever, she can do what she wants, but if it was somehow legally binding...

I don't feel like a sane person wrote it and I don't feel like it is a great idea to enter into a questionably legal "contract:" with an insane person. Especially when the stated penalty for breaking the NDA is far more than their gross income over a 5+ year stretch.

It seems like bullshit, but if it is somehow legit and is bad-intentioned then it has the potential to ruin at least one life. I feel like I'm being paranoid, but I also feel like that paranoia might be justified.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 07:44

Sonic Dude: May 6, 2009

Dave Inc. posted:

I'm sure this has been asked a bunch of times in the thread, so sorry to ask for it again--I'm just not feeling tip top.

My wife and I want to get a divorce. We're on very good terms and believe we can do it pro se since we have very straight forward assets and no children. I'm just wondering if anyone can give me a quick sum up of how the process goes*--I've looked at a bunch of sites but I feel like there's a block and I'm missing important steps in the process or something.

* - i.e. "you do this" "court does that" "you do this" "court does that" etc.

Edit: I'm in Cuyahoga County, Ohio.

Not sure if it's kosher to be too terribly specific in this thread since I'm not a lawyer, but I just went through this process about three weeks ago so it's relatively fresh in my mind.

My ex-wife and I did a dissolution rather than a divorce since we're on speaking terms. It's much easier and much faster and much cheaper. I had a lawyer handle mine, but a friend of mine handled hers all pro se and she said it wasn't hard (to the point that she was surprised I hired a lawyer).

Mine was in Franklin county, but it went sort of like this:

Make a giant list of everything you have, and decide who gets what. Furniture, bank accounts (both the money inside and the account itself), property, cars, pets (remembering that pets are property and not children), etc.
Talk to the clerk of courts and find out what form you need to fill out.
Turn in said form and get a court date.
Prior to the court date a magistrate says "okey dokey" to your paperwork.
Make sure you're living separately by the court date, and the more property/assets you can split up in the meantime the better.
Show up to court in decent clothes, answer the judge's questions with short, honest, statements (and don't be a blubbery mess like some of the people were - the court really doesn't care how you feel), and wait for the judge to say "the court grants you blah blah blah."

While it is definitely possible to do one your own, I was much, much more comfortable knowing there was a lawyer on my side (since he or she will only be representing one of you) in case something went wrong or there was some other form that needed to be filled out along the way. At a minimum it would not hurt to have someone with actual legal training and experience look over everything, and maybe draw up a paper requesting a name change on behalf of your wife if she wants that. I'm not sure when that gets filed, because my lawyer handled that.

Spend a lot of time with friends, and don't drink too much. Unless your relationship is very bitter and you're both scrambling to be out of it (which it doesn't sound like is the case since you're on good terms), each step in the process is going to be more and more lovely.

# ? Oct 14, 2011 14:24

ibntumart: Mar 18, 2007; Good, bad. I'm the one with the power of Shu, Heru, Amon, Zehuti, Aton, and Mehen.; College Slice

A dissolution IS a divorce. The terms are equivalent.

# ? Oct 15, 2011 01:56

seuratonin: Oct 15, 2011

Dayton, OH.

I am currently going through the process of acquiring a security clearance.

Because of some things I did when I was younger, the current recommendation is to deny me the clearance, but I have the option to respond to their claims.

I'm pretty sure I can counter their claims effectively, but, I'm pretty sure I need a lawyer to at least write up the response for me, and maybe even make sure I'm not being dumb about it.

Is there a specialization for this type of thing (Dayton has a lot of defense contractors, if such a specialty exists, I'm guessing I can find it here)? What would it be called?

# ? Oct 15, 2011 02:17

Sonic Dude: May 6, 2009

ibntumart posted:

A dissolution IS a divorce. The terms are equivalent.

Not in Ohio. A dissolution is basically a fast-track thing whereby a complaint isn't needed. You just fill out the form, say "we both want the court to end the marriage" and that's that. A divorce is treated as a lawsuit brought against one party as the defendant (as I believe it is most other places), and involves a lot more crap.

http://www.ohiobar.org/pages/lawfactspamphletsdetail.aspx?itemid=8

Again, not a lawyer. Just did this last month though.

# ? Oct 15, 2011 02:58

dvgrhl: Sep 30, 2004; Do you think you are dealing with a 4-year-old child to whom you can give some walnuts and chocolates and get gold from him?; Soiled Meat

seuratonin posted:

Dayton, OH.

I am currently going through the process of acquiring a security clearance.

Because of some things I did when I was younger, the current recommendation is to deny me the clearance, but I have the option to respond to their claims.

I'm pretty sure I can counter their claims effectively, but, I'm pretty sure I need a lawyer to at least write up the response for me, and maybe even make sure I'm not being dumb about it.

Is there a specialization for this type of thing (Dayton has a lot of defense contractors, if such a specialty exists, I'm guessing I can find it here)? What would it be called?

What clearance are you trying to get? And what is in your past? It sounds like you're trying for a secret or top secret clearance? Depending on what it is that is in your past, you may have the option to respond but it may not matter. It's a long thread, but this thread http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3324421 has a lot of good information on what things will disqualify you from secret or top secret clearance.

# ? Oct 15, 2011 04:27

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

Huh Ohio is strange. That dissolution would be called a divorce most anywhere else.

# ? Oct 15, 2011 04:29

hypocrite lecteur: Aug 21, 2008; by Y Kant Ozma Post

C.C.C.P. posted:

stuff

you may want to speak with counsel before you go, there's something missing in your story. From what you've said, I don't understand why someone would go to the trouble of trying to get a restraining order, there has to be something else.

If you don't end up talking to a lawyer before you go, if you show up and get blindsided by something crazy ask the judge or justice of the peace or whatever to set the matter over to let you get a lawyer

seuratonin posted:

Dayton, OH.

I am currently going through the process of acquiring a security clearance.

Because of some things I did when I was younger, the current recommendation is to deny me the clearance, but I have the option to respond to their claims.

I'm pretty sure I can counter their claims effectively, but, I'm pretty sure I need a lawyer to at least write up the response for me, and maybe even make sure I'm not being dumb about it.

Is there a specialization for this type of thing (Dayton has a lot of defense contractors, if such a specialty exists, I'm guessing I can find it here)? What would it be called?

depending on the nature and quality of the decision and any right of review or appeal, you may have a right to be represented by counsel, and there's definitely lawyers out there who have experience appealing administrative decisions. I really don't know where you'd start finding that out though

hypocrite lecteur fucked around with this message at 09:44 on Oct 15, 2011

# ? Oct 15, 2011 09:37

the littlest prince: Sep 23, 2006

oops, wrong thread.

# ? Oct 15, 2011 13:52

Merrack: Sep 15, 2007

seuratonin posted:

Is there a specialization for this type of thing (Dayton has a lot of defense contractors, if such a specialty exists, I'm guessing I can find it here)? What would it be called?

There are certainly lawyers who specialize in this sort of thing. For example, http://www.morrislawcenter.com/Practice-Areas/Security-Clearance-Law.aspx . Never needed to look for one in Dayton, but there's enough defense contracting there I'm sure you'd be able to find someone.

Regarding the "Depending on what it is that is in your past, you may have the option to respond but it may not matter" see http://www.dod.gov/dodgc/doha/industrial/ for cases and their outcomes. It's definitely going to be worth investing your time in at least a free phone interview with a qualified attorney to see what the specifics of your appeal would be, and what your chances are. Good luck!

The Dayton Bar Association website says they do referrals; I'd start by calling them and seeing who they direct you to.

# ? Oct 15, 2011 14:21

seuratonin: Oct 15, 2011

^^ Thanks, I'll get ahold of them on Monday.

dvgrhl posted:

What clearance are you trying to get? And what is in your past? It sounds like you're trying for a secret or top secret clearance? Depending on what it is that is in your past, you may have the option to respond but it may not matter. It's a long thread, but this thread http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3324421 has a lot of good information on what things will disqualify you from secret or top secret clearance.

hypocrite lecteur posted:

depending on the nature and quality of the decision and any right of review or appeal, you may have a right to be represented by counsel, and there's definitely lawyers out there who have experience appealing administrative decisions. I really don't know where you'd start finding that out though

Secret, for now. I already know I have the right to be be represented by counsel, and based on the documentation I've seen, and the plaintiff's written argument, my problem can be mitigated (in fact it looks like almost any problem can be mitigated in numerous ways). The decision hasn't actually been made yet, just a recommendation from the DoD.

I smoked some weed in the past, is the gist of it. Nothing huge.

Thanks for the link. There is a dude in that thread that smoked for six years straight and still got his top-secret equivalent, so I think I have a good shot. Nice to know.

# ? Oct 16, 2011 00:15

Aquamarie: Jul 22, 2004; do not swim without knowing jeez

My bike was stolen from me a couple weeks ago, but luckily found later that day. I received an official letter yesterday asking me to attend the hearing of the young man who stole it from me. My friend thinks it is important that I go, but I really don't want to. Does it make difference if I choose not to attend?

# ? Oct 16, 2011 01:02

BigHead: Jul 25, 2003; Huh?; Nap Ghost

Aquamarie posted:

My bike was stolen from me a couple weeks ago, but luckily found later that day. I received an official letter yesterday asking me to attend the hearing of the young man who stole it from me. My friend thinks it is important that I go, but I really don't want to. Does it make difference if I choose not to attend?

If I were prosecuting the case I wouldn't care either way. As long as you told the police at some point that the bike was yours and worth approximately $X, the prosecutor doesn't need you. Just make sure there's a good phone number and address in the file, just in case he does need you in the future.

# ? Oct 16, 2011 02:16

dvgrhl: Sep 30, 2004; Do you think you are dealing with a 4-year-old child to whom you can give some walnuts and chocolates and get gold from him?; Soiled Meat

seuratonin posted:

^^ Thanks, I'll get ahold of them on Monday.

Secret, for now. I already know I have the right to be be represented by counsel, and based on the documentation I've seen, and the plaintiff's written argument, my problem can be mitigated (in fact it looks like almost any problem can be mitigated in numerous ways). The decision hasn't actually been made yet, just a recommendation from the DoD.

I smoked some weed in the past, is the gist of it. Nothing huge.

Thanks for the link. There is a dude in that thread that smoked for six years straight and still got his top-secret equivalent, so I think I have a good shot. Nice to know.

Yeah, if that's the basics of the issue, then yes I would say you have a good shot at it being mitigated. Pot use is one of those things that can be mitigated if it was in the past and has been a few years since your last use. Good luck. I hope that soon it won't even be an issue.

# ? Oct 16, 2011 02:28

Konstantin: Jun 20, 2005; And the Lord said, "Look, they are one people, and they have all one language; and this is only the beginning of what they will do; nothing that they propose to do will now be impossible for them.

With the sheer number of clearances that need to be granted, I'm surprised that pot use is an issue now. We're at the point where the only people who haven't used pot at some point in their life are sheltered choir boys, so having that as a disqualifier would turn away huge numbers of qualified applicants.

# ? Oct 16, 2011 02:43

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# ? May 15, 2024 10:46

Solomon Grundy: Feb 10, 2007; Born on a Monday

Konstantin posted:

With the sheer number of clearances that need to be granted, I'm surprised that pot use is an issue now. We're at the point where the only people who haven't used pot at some point in their life are sheltered choir boys, so having that as a disqualifier would turn away huge numbers of qualified applicants.

It didn't disqualify my sister from top secret clearance, so I am surprised you are having such a rough go of it.

# ? Oct 16, 2011 04:31

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