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The room was dark. The only source of light came from headlights of passing cars. As their beams crawl through the blinds, the walls are briefly illuminated, throwing all of the artwork tacked to it into sharp relief. Lancing through the murk, a girl is seen in the corner only for a brief instant before the dark swallows her again. Her knees pressed to her chest, she rocks silently back and forth. "This is not my home", she thinks. "This only a horrible dream. Some day the Captain of the White Ship will come and take me away. I alone have the key. We'll travel to Xil'natha, the Kingdom Beyond the Sea, where I'm their long lost princess and I alone am heir to the throne" A scream is heard downstairs. The sound of breaking dishes soon follows. A thin cry begins to escape her lips. "Those aren't my parents", she whispers. "My real parents are the king and queen of Xil'natha, overthrown by Urenka. Those are just imposters, minions sent by the evil queen to make sure I never come back." Tears begin to stream down her face, as clear as the diamonds that adorn the spire of her beloved castle. As they fall, they only wet the pictures of that lovely land that was first dreamt of so long ago.
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Nov 5, 2011 18:44
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Raserys posted:
Yeah, hitting the little question mark makes those threads much better.
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Nov 5, 2011 18:48
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ornery bean posted:Not even gonna lie, Uglynoodles, but after reading that post I took one of the hottest, most exfoliating showers in my life. Reading about Denise makes me feel grungy. Oh wow, never thought I'd see you grossed out. That's... that's something.
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Nov 5, 2011 19:56
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Instant Grat posted:Oh wow, never thought I'd see you grossed out. That's... that's something. Uglynoodles - this is kind of a strange question, but... When Denise's father inevitably passes on, are you going to attend his funeral? poo poo, do you think DENISE will?
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Nov 5, 2011 20:16
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ornery bean posted:Okay, seriously, I'm big on hygiene. If I poo poo myself or on somebody else we take a shower, we don't let it crust over. A better question is what the hell is Denise going to do when he dies? I think she is fully capable of taking care of herself. She is just lazy, immature, and doesn't really want to stop playing as long as she doesn't have to. Will she end up being one of those career welfare collectors living in a trailer park never trying to do anything else with her life or will she grow up when her dad dies, her friends abandon her, and she is left to fend for herself?
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Nov 5, 2011 20:31
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Corbid Muriosity posted:A better question is what the hell is Denise going to do when he dies? I think she is fully capable of taking care of herself. She is just lazy, immature, and doesn't really want to stop playing as long as she doesn't have to. Will she end up being one of those career welfare collectors living in a trailer park never trying to do anything else with her life or will she grow up when her dad dies, her friends abandon her, and she is left to fend for herself?
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Nov 5, 2011 20:40
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Wow, that bead story was depressing as hell.
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Nov 5, 2011 21:02
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Why isn't someone buying Denise an account? Surely she can't be so bad that she wouldn't fit in with goons.
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Nov 5, 2011 21:16
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Tasty and Delicious posted:Why isn't someone buying Denise an account? Surely she can't be so bad that she wouldn't fit in with goons. Yeah that would work out great. Personally I would love if someone said to me "Hey come check out this website, it's really great" and then 60 people immediately started in on me telling me how stupid and terrible I was and buying me 30 avatars in 4 minutes and campaigning to get me permabanned instantly, to show me true ownage.
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Nov 5, 2011 21:20
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Tasty and Delicious posted:Why isn't someone buying Denise an account? Surely she can't be so bad that she wouldn't fit in with goons. This idea is never as funny as you think it is
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Nov 5, 2011 21:38
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Corbid Muriosity posted:A better question is what the hell is Denise going to do when he dies? I think she is fully capable of taking care of herself. She is just lazy, immature, and doesn't really want to stop playing as long as she doesn't have to. Will she end up being one of those career welfare collectors living in a trailer park never trying to do anything else with her life or will she grow up when her dad dies, her friends abandon her, and she is left to fend for herself? I know people like Denise (living habits-wise, not delusional anime princess-wise) that live on their own. I don't know how they do it because they live in utter filth and sustain themselves on instant Mac & Cheese and bologna sandwiches, but they do it somehow. I used to follow the Reddit thread in D&D and someone was posting gems from a thread about a woman who lived like I imagine Denise would. Here are some highlights: - Would only homeschool her kids because of her "morals." These morals had nothing to do with Creationism and the like, but rather because she felt that public schools are nothing more than a breeding ground for bullies who live to harass her precious snowflake of a child. - The thread itself was about her not having time to do anything. "Anything," in this case, referred to playing video games and manga. I'm serious. She was a wife and mom with a kindergarten-aged kid who was complaining because she had no videogame and animu time. Her husband apparently used to "faint" whenever he attempted to cook, so I guess that was up to her as well. - People in the thread were suggesting to get her life together and have some constructive hobbies. She was indignant that she already had hobbies (when asked, these were, again, playing videogames and reading manga) and only wanted hobbies inside. I never got around to reading the whole thing, but the tidbits I did see were nothing short of a trainwreck. I'd imagine her house was a sty that reeked of BO and cheap ramen. That poor kid probably doesn't even have any friends  I don't have a link to this thread (the Reddit one I mean, not the D&D one), sorry, but it is kind of relevant so if there's anyone that knows what I'm talking about you could probably post it.
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Nov 5, 2011 22:20
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This latest post has actually given me an idea. When I was really little, I made some bead lizards. If I get the job I want, volunteer work teaching art to children, I'm going to brush up and re-teach myself to make them so I can teach the kids how to make lizard keychains for their folks. 
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Nov 6, 2011 00:22
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I may be suffering from a memory lapse, but have we ever gotten details on Denise's Dollfies? I recall the posts where she was saving up, but I don't think we've gotten any details on what they're like. Were they already all painted up and dressed or did Denise do them herself?
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Nov 6, 2011 00:29
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Not a huge post, just an illustration I didn't have the time to do yesterday: Mr. D Bewildering posted:I may be suffering from a memory lapse, but have we ever gotten details on Denise's Dollfies? I recall the posts where she was saving up, but I don't think we've gotten any details on what they're like. Were they already all painted up and dressed or did Denise do them herself? Denise has one Dollfie as far as I know. Unless she's bought more, in which case, well, whatever I guess. $800 was just enough to buy her the 'right' Dollfie who looked enough like that gross skinny character from her yaoi point and click game she loves so much. As far as I know she only buys clothes for it, all of course are completely ridiculously priced. quote:What will happen when George dies? Honestly? I don't know. Probably the same thing that's happening to Chris-chan now that his dad is dead. Honestly, she will probably embark on a horrifically failed endeavour to live with her cousin. Since her cousin is every bit as inexperienced at life as she is I'm sure it'd make a great reality show.
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Nov 6, 2011 01:28
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Corbid Muriosity posted:A better question is what the hell is Denise going to do when he dies? I think she is fully capable of taking care of herself. She is just lazy, immature, and doesn't really want to stop playing as long as she doesn't have to. Denise is in no way "fully capable" of taking care of herself. Being crazy isn't an attitude problem.
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Nov 6, 2011 02:03
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Schwarzwald posted:Denise is in no way "fully capable" of taking care of herself. Being crazy isn't an attitude problem. But it has been said that she hides it from most everyone, like her dad, but shows out for people like Noodles and Kat who seem to tolerate it for the most part. Wouldn't a crazy person not give a gently caress and just let everyone know about her magic sky castles and stuff because they actually believe it's real? I don't know, I'm just asking.
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Nov 6, 2011 02:37
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These illustrations are fantastic and makes me wish I sat down and learnt to draw competently. I don't think Denise's being crazy is tantamount to her not being able to take care of herself (henriette seems to be doing well as I found out), it's her attitude problems of being lazy, selfish and not making an effort to learn sile life skills like sending mail.
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Nov 6, 2011 02:46
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Corbid Muriosity posted:A better question is what the hell is Denise going to do when he dies? I think she is fully capable of taking care of herself. She is just lazy, immature, and doesn't really want to stop playing as long as she doesn't have to. Will she end up being one of those career welfare collectors living in a trailer park never trying to do anything else with her life or will she grow up when her dad dies, her friends abandon her, and she is left to fend for herself? If she got out more, I wouldn't be surprised if she found some downtrodden dude to glom off of and marry. Tasty and Delicious posted:Why isn't someone buying Denise an account? Surely she can't be so bad that she wouldn't fit in with goons.
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Nov 6, 2011 02:50
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Corbid Muriosity posted:But it has been said that she hides it from most everyone, like her dad, but shows out for people like Noodles and Kat who seem to tolerate it for the most part. Wouldn't a crazy person not give a gently caress and just let everyone know about her magic sky castles and stuff because they actually believe it's real? I don't know, I'm just asking. Would you believe that there are different varieties of crazy, out there in the world?
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Nov 6, 2011 02:53
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Schwarzwald posted:Denise is in no way "fully capable" of taking care of herself. Being crazy isn't an attitude problem.
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Nov 6, 2011 02:53
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Knight of the
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uglynoodles posted:Not a huge post, just an illustration I didn't have the time to do yesterday: You are the gold among the dross, uglynoodles. Keep on shining. Seriously, these illustrations and horribilarious stories really brighten my day.
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Nov 6, 2011 03:04
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Tasty and Delicious posted:Why isn't someone buying Denise an account? Surely she can't be so bad that she wouldn't fit in with goons. Importing drama is a bannable offense, and that's exactly what getting her an account would be doing.
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Nov 6, 2011 05:12
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Out of sheer morbid curiosity, I really want to see what this chick really looks like. Is that weird?
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Nov 6, 2011 05:52
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TShields posted:Out of sheer morbid curiosity, I really want to see what this chick really looks like. Is that weird? kind of. Really i'd say that uglynoodles illustrations are pretty close and just go with that. loving the stories, they just show how far some people go for things like attention and standing out.
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Nov 6, 2011 06:02
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TShields posted:Out of sheer morbid curiosity, I really want to see what this chick really looks like. Is that weird?
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Nov 6, 2011 06:25
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We will not be posting pictures of her. The drawings are fairly accurate, as far as caricature goes. Just tone the exaggeration down a touch and it's a good representation. And picture the height at around.. 5'6"? Maybe shorter? Ugly, help me on this. I suck at telling heights that are shorter than me. I think she could live... as in basic, low-income survival. She'd planned to move in with Melissa. Still plans to, I think. And yes, I do think 'mooching off another relative' is a probability. Sorry I haven't been contributing stories. It's getting to the part of the semester where everything important is due.
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Nov 6, 2011 07:30
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Who's Melissa? I saw the name appear a few times but must have missed the origin.
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Nov 6, 2011 07:54
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Did you ever explain how you know that one of them doesn't know how to masturbate?
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Nov 6, 2011 08:28
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Ervin K posted:Who's Melissa? I saw the name appear a few times but must have missed the origin. Denise's cousin.
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Nov 6, 2011 09:50
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I actually saw a girl on the train back before Halloween that looked exactly like the drawings sans the exaggeration (and also I'm guessing Denise eventually got a hair cut? It looks like her hair is shorter than her ponytail days in the recent drawings, and this chick had long hair) and wearing cat ears for Halloween. Could totally tell from a glance that she was probably an anime fan too. I did a double take, it was so spot on, but this girl was out with some friends, seemed very happy and appeared to be the bathing type (she looked clean and there was also no foul odor on the train). Still though the resemblance to the art was remarkable save for hair style. Seeing her definitely helped me envision Denise (not that I really had much of a hard time before though). Speaking of Melissa, she was mentioned in the OP and I'm hoping we get to hear some more crazy stories about her because while we've heard some stuff she feels like an enigma to me.
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Nov 6, 2011 10:05
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Obligatory Toast posted:If she got out more, I wouldn't be surprised if she found some downtrodden dude to glom off of and marry.
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Nov 6, 2011 12:34
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I'm pretty sure Melissa has been alluded to more than directly referenced. Kat made mention of her in a post and there were hints of her in uglynoodle's stuff.
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Nov 6, 2011 12:53
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ornery bean posted:I don't think so. I'm really curious, too. Mainly because I wanna see how close to the drawing she actually is, haha. I prefer to think of her as the drawing. She is out there somewhere making sparkler dongs and marveling at the mystery of mailing a letter.
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Nov 6, 2011 16:05
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Haraksha posted:I'm pretty sure Melissa has been alluded to more than directly referenced. Kat made mention of her in a post and there were hints of her in uglynoodle's stuff. And those allusions have all been "she's really nice and it's sad that she's wrapped up in this, unlike Denise who's a total bitch" so I dunno how interesting it would be.
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Nov 6, 2011 16:48
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Alterian posted:I feel like less of a weirdo for wanting to name any future kids with Greek Mythology names. I've known lots of girls named 'Cynthia'.
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Nov 6, 2011 19:22
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fritz posted:I've known lots of girls named 'Cynthia'. That name is from Greek mythology? Woah
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Nov 6, 2011 19:55
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Farecoal posted:That name is from Greek mythology? Woah http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cynthia It seems it was more of a nickname for Artemis.
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Nov 6, 2011 20:16
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Just try to avoid Bellerophon. vvv Provided you don't spike his heels together and leave him for dead on a hill, I think you'll be OK. redmercer fucked around with this message at 21:18 on Nov 6, 2011 |
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Nov 6, 2011 20:55
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I'm planning on naming my son Oedipus, I just hope he doesn't try to kill me over it someday.
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Nov 6, 2011 21:03
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Panzerschwein posted:I'm planning on naming my son Oedipus, I just hope he doesn't try to kill me over it someday. That invites all sorts of family trouble even if there is no death involved 
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Nov 6, 2011 21:21
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