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 Round One, Match Fifty-EightMatch Fifty-Eight, Yum (Pelao) vs. Dark Lord Obnoxious (Mega64) Yum, a female goblin, bears a copper war hammer, oak shield, leather cap, and simple leather armor. Dark Lord Obnoxious, a male gremlin, has an iron dagger and no real aspirations toward victory. OK, I'm going to let you all in on this: Dark Lord Obnoxious has grand master dodging and basically nothing else. This is not so much a fight as it is a game of whack-a-mole, and I am going to treat it as such!  Both combatant and soon-to-be victim rush forward. Dark Lord Obnoxious is unsurprisingly faster, and attempts a pitiful little feint with his over-sized knife. Yum easily knocks the attack away and counters by slamming down her copper hammer, which the gremlin deftly avoids, chuckling. Yum charges at the fey little fucker, knocking him to the ground. She swings her hammer with all her might, but DLO rolls across the arena floor with unnatural speed, avoiding the strike, then pops to his feet. Yum charges again, tripping up the gremlin and causing him to face-plant, stunned. She goes straight for the legs, bashing once with her hammer, kicking, then bashing again. The final strike shatters the gremlin's ankle and foot entirely!  DLO makes a laughable attempt to stab Yum, but his stubby arms aren't even able to reach the goblin. A couple hammerblows to the leg fail to hit squarely, but seconds later DLO passes out, and Yum dispatches the feral little thing by squashing its little head. Despite her easy win, she feels cheated by her arena debut, and leaves the ring unsatisfied.  Combat Log Special congrats to Yum and her manager for keeping this "fight" as short as was reasonably possible!
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Nov 7, 2011 21:04
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| # ? May 29, 2024 14:14 |
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I dreamed that the second round had already started and as a special exhibition match to kick things off, Hungry Mungry was pitted against a hydra. When I woke up, I tested the matchup. It went about like that. 
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Nov 7, 2011 21:14
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I was hoping he would be more obnoxious. And that the opponent would maybe pass out from exhaustion.
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Nov 7, 2011 21:15
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I can't get the "Annie breaks his ankle with the sledgehammer" scene from Misery out of my head.
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Nov 7, 2011 21:16
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Yeah, I've noticed that focusing on Dodging or Shield just really isn't good, and that a balance of Defense and Offense is much better. Really high dodging will help you survive a couple would-be hits...but unless you can retaliate, there is no real hope for you.
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Nov 7, 2011 22:24
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Krysmphoenix posted:Yeah, I've noticed that focusing on Dodging or Shield just really isn't good, and that a balance of Defense and Offense is much better. Really high dodging will help you survive a couple would-be hits...but unless you can retaliate, there is no real hope for you. Yeah, high dodging paired with a high weapon skill in a decent weapon is effective, but that can be tricky to balance on first round points.
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Nov 7, 2011 22:34
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AJ_Impy posted:Yeah, high dodging paired with a high weapon skill in a decent weapon is effective, but that can be tricky to balance on first round points. Well, Weapon:Fighting/Archery:Dodging, that's the ratio you've got to tweak. I tweaked it quite a bit, here's hoping what I've got isn't terrible. I'm up next.
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Nov 7, 2011 22:37
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My preemptive condolences to you and your Bowbald, Krympshoenike.
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Nov 7, 2011 23:06
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I totally forget what my fighter's build is. I think three or four more fights until he comes on the scene.
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Nov 7, 2011 23:17
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Krysmphoenix posted:Well, Weapon:Fighting/Archery:Dodging, that's the ratio you've got to tweak. I tweaked it quite a bit, here's hoping what I've got isn't terrible. I'm up next. I have a feeling you may be presently surprised.. I did not test against archers.. I had hoped not to have to fight one first round.
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Nov 7, 2011 23:49
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Meat curtains will avenge all dead gremlins. Edit: and win some piece of armor too heavy for her.
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Nov 8, 2011 00:00
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And with that Goblin Victory, my available funds for next round have broken 8 grand.  I await the beginning of the second round of fights with baited breath, these last few fights simply can't come soon enough. To the twelve remaining fighters; We who still live salute those who may die! Dr. Stranglelove and The Reborn Krying Pheonix! We salute you! George and The Librarian! We salute you! Pip and Lady Rhianu! We salute you! Huaso and Ted! We salute you! Yeti-with-a-serial-number and Mutt Jr! We salute you! Hoonboof and The ElfStomper! We salute you! To the losers: May your cups runneth over in the Halls of Warholla! To the victors: We await your might in the next round!
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Nov 8, 2011 04:42
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Right, so to get some good luck, I'm going to kill some Kobolds so that my next Kobold is super lucky! Let's just create a worthy opponent...  That looks good. Adamantine weapons and armor, platinum shields, Grand Master skills in everything. Now for the Kobolds.  Give them wood bows and enough arrows that they won't stop shooting while they are getting murdered, and no skills so they'll die fast. Now to just unpause and....  Good. Everything is going according to pla--    The RNG doesn't even like me when I'm killing Kobolds anymore.
Krysmphoenix fucked around with this message at 16:12 on Nov 26, 2011 |
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Nov 8, 2011 05:05
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Krysmphoenix, that kill came courtesy of the 1% chance I gave to helmets to fail under any given attack, partially to prevent endless, fruitless head-bashing and partially to incentivize buying a cap. You can tell because it doesn't say "...through his small adamantine helm!"
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Nov 8, 2011 07:11
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I hope this thing isn't dead
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Nov 17, 2011 02:40
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Skyrim collects another head.
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Nov 17, 2011 02:46
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SynthOrange posted:Skyrim collects another head. All future fights will be run using approximations in Skyrim. Actually with a little bit of modding, that wouldn't be a terrible idea...
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Nov 17, 2011 12:50
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steinrokkan posted:I hope this thing isn't dead quote:Skyrim collects another head. Nope, not dead! Sorry about the delay. Skyrim is a good guess, and admittedly not entirely inaccurate, but I've had all sorts of distractions, from setting into a new job, to trouble with my girlfriend, and even a car accident. But fear not, I'd never let the thread die in the middle of a season. Expect more fights starting Sunday and continuing at an increased pace next week!
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Nov 19, 2011 10:20
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Erk, car accident? Nothing too serious I hope.
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Nov 19, 2011 18:25
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Klokwurk posted:Erk, car accident? Nothing too serious I hope. No injuries. Just lots of phone calls, inspections, red tape, etc. to deal with.
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Nov 19, 2011 21:47
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Vox Nihili posted:No injuries. Just lots of phone calls, inspections, red tape, etc. to deal with. Welp, glad to know you're alright. Don't work yourself to death for our sake.
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Nov 19, 2011 22:04
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Round One, Match Fifty-Nine Match Fifty-Nine, Dr Stranglelove (Shorter Than Some) vs. The Reborn Krying Phoenix (Krysmphoenix) Dr Stranglelove, strangler, wields a pair of copper picks between his four arms, and is entirely unarmored. He comes up against Krying Phoenix, a kobold with a silver bow and a similar lack of interest in armor. It's all going to come down to the first couple shots, here!  The strangler charges forward, just as Phoenix's bow twangs. The arrow flies wide! The kobold scrambles to reload, then fires again- burying an arrow in Dr Stranglelove's thigh.  But the strangler continues to fly forward! Will Phoenix get another shot before being run over? Yes! Just before Dr Stranglelove can strike, Phoenix looses an arrow- but the missile only scratches his opponent's skin, failing to inflict any serious damage. The strangler completes his charge, buffeting the kobold to the ground and immediately cleaving off a hand. A short-lived whirlwind of pick strikes follows, tearing Krying Phoenix to bits. The kobold expires of blood loss in mere seconds, and Dr Stranglelove advances!  Combat Log The rumors of this thread's demise were somewhat exaggerated. Glad to be back to things!
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Nov 25, 2011 11:22
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Oh kobolds, even against a strangler he couldnt win.
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Nov 25, 2011 11:51
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When oh when will Skyrimphoenix realize that Kobolds are just a little bit poo poo. Great to see you back, Vox. Sorry for your cavalcade of woes, hope it all works out ok.
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Nov 25, 2011 18:31
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Bene Elim posted:When oh when will Skyrimphoenix realize that Kobolds are just a little bit poo poo. 
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Nov 25, 2011 18:48
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Another victim of outdated beliefs in silver arrows?
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Nov 25, 2011 19:01
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Nov 25, 2011 19:33
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PublicOpinion posted:Now that's perfect.  How long have you been sitting on it?
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Nov 25, 2011 19:35
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ZeeToo posted:How long have you been sitting on it? "Something to 'kry' about" occurred to me right after the match was posted, but it wasn't until just now that I realized a way to actually use that terrible and obvious a pseudo-pun. I was just glad I could come up with something for the little dwarf-Kelly to say.
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Nov 25, 2011 19:47
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PublicOpinion posted:That's really excellent.
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Nov 25, 2011 19:47
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PublicOpinion posted:...I wish I didn't change my avatar recently. I will treasure this forever. EDIT: Good grief, I had a rough day at work, but then I come back and see this and my day is shining like it was when I first saw this. I just love this picture so much. From the phoenix that's actually crying, to the cutebold getting kicked by the RNG (although I always pictured it as a bloodstained d20) to the little dwarf in the corner there. I'm not sure if that comment is directed towards my treatment of kobolds or the RNG itself, but that little vagueness makes it all the better because, really, both are true. I love all the art you've been doing for the thread. Just keep it up. Krysmphoenix fucked around with this message at 06:22 on Nov 27, 2011 |
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Nov 25, 2011 19:59
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Oh awesome, I fully expected to lose that match, I did no testing against archers and had tested exhaustively against everything else. Also am I right in thinking we don't know who we will be up against next round?
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Nov 26, 2011 15:37
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Correct. I think after the round is over and all points are spent, there'll be a big shuffle, and then we'll know.
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Nov 26, 2011 19:43
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Round One, Match Sixty Match Sixty, George (synthorange) vs. Ook. Ook? OOOOOOKK! (Exercu) George the yeti is armored with a massive suit of roughly-made iron mail upon his torso and a ludicrously tiny cap atop his over-sized head. He easily wields a massive, shiny copper maul in one hand. The strangler Ook. Ook? OOOOOOKK! carries an iron battleaxe. He has an especially mean glint in his eye, which will hopefully make up for his complete lack of armor.  The match begins! Ook bursts from his corner like bat out of hell, flying across the ring with impressive speed. George does what he can to match the pace, but ultimately has to concede the first strike to his agile opponent. Ook hefts his axe and swings, cutting into the yeti's lower leg like a woodsmen into an old-growth oak. The bit cuts deep, though it doesn't penetrate through bone. George looks surprised, then tumbles to the ground in one sudden motion! Ook's strike severed a vital nerve!  From his position on the ground, George waves his maul at Ook, but the strangler hops away safely. Just as quickly, he hops back into range, striking the yeti in the chest- but the beast's mail turns the edged weapon. Ook manages to parry George's next effort, then opts to dig his nails into the yeti's open leg wound, ripping through a tendon without even using his weapon! Next he chops off George's left hand, then immediately takes the rest of the lower left arm, working up the extremity like a chef dicing through produce!  Ook skips to the feet next, hacking one off at the ankle with one impressive, clean motion. George, panicked, finally tries to stem the tide of his own blood with an attack, but the strangler easily parries the weak blow and slices the yeti's hand in half in response, forcing the heavy maul from its grasp.  A few moments later, George passes out from the pain. Ook goes for the kill. George's cap deflects the first strike, but not the second. The yeti is slain, and Ook advances to the next round! Combat Log Props to Exercu for putting together an extremely solid, lean build. I'm excited to see what direction he takes his strangler in!
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Nov 28, 2011 10:16
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Always love fights involving sharp weapons. Poor yeti. Four more fights to go before we find out the new line-up.
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Nov 28, 2011 10:38
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Round One, Match Sixty-One Match Sixty-One, Pip (CommaToes) vs. Lady Rhianu (Onean) Pip, tigerman, is armored in the classic "core defense" setup with an iron breast plate and matching iron helm. He wields an iron short sword, little more than a dagger to a warrior of his stature. The elf by the name of Lady Rhianu stands in the far corner. She wields a simple copper spear and copper shield, a time-tested battle kit. Her armor choices, however, are more... esoteric. She wears stylish leather gloves, gleaming copper greaves, and three layers of torso armor, including copper mail, iron mail, and hardened leather armor. Strangely, she does not bother with boots or a helm, instead electing for an asymmetrical approach to defensive cladding. Let's see how it serves her!  The bout begins. Lady Rhianu quickly closes the distance with her opponent and takes the first strike, missing wide with her spear. Pip swings next, and the elf catches the blow on her shield, then counters- missing once more.  Rhianu thrusts her spear again, but misses for the third time, giving Pip an opening to strike- but the tigerman botches his counter, as well! Pip decides he's tired of this nonsense and pounces, driving Rhianu to the ground, stunned, even as his sword fails to connect. An immediate follow-up with his sword shears off the elf's sword hand, leaving her with only a shield. A slash across her chest fails to penetrate her heavy armor.  Rhianu recovers, just in time to roll away from the next brutal attack. From the ground, she blocks the tigerman's next slash, then tries to bash at him with her shield, but doesn't seem entirely comfortable with this method of attack, and comes no where near inflicting damage. Finally, Rhianu gets to her feet, blocking another strike as she rises. Clearly, her defensive skills are well-honed, but at this point it's essentially just a matter of time before Pip wears her down.  The tigerman's next charge puts Rhianu back on the cold arena floor, and Pip wastes no time in ripping off one of the elf's unprotected feet. Rhianu sweeps her shield at her tormentor one last time, forcing the tigerman to step back, then expires, bleeding out. Pip advances!  Combat Log
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Nov 28, 2011 10:40
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And here I was, thinking my luck was changing. 
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Nov 28, 2011 13:17
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Hey now, if it's any consolation, at least your Yeti just about matches your avatar by the end of the match!
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Nov 28, 2011 17:13
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A late forty to be poured on the ground for Urvad, poor dwarf he was. He was in dying as he was in life: an embarrassment.
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Dec 4, 2011 08:58
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Go Pip! I'm glad my streak of 3 letter names is going well.My mistake last tourney was giving him a last name.
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Dec 10, 2011 03:22
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