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Pastrymancy
Feb 20, 2011

11:13: Despite Gio Gonzalez warning, "Never mix your sparkling juices," Bryce Harper opens another bottle of sparkling grape and mixes it with sparkling cider.

1:07: Harper walks to the 7-11 and orders an all-syrup Slurpee.

1:10-3:05: Harper has no recollection of this time. Aliens?

Regy Rusty posted:

I had to take it as soon as I saw it. That is the best face I've ever seen.

:hfive: What up, horrified-at-everything buddy?

Also, Robot Aradia callback coming up. Brobot is yanking something from his torso in the second-to-last panel.

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H.P. Shivcraft
Mar 17, 2008

STAY UNRULY, YOU HEARTLESS MONSTERS!
Vriska, why did you mind-control Jane into saying "No"?!?!?!?!

Regy Rusty
Apr 26, 2010

Exactly. Now I too have the perfect face to go along with my every post.

Starmaker
Dec 29, 2009

My people I bring you a message from the Lord!

Nate RFB posted:

I guess, ultimately, I don't feel there are that many new mysteries being introduced here. Vriska 2.0 and UU, I guess? Everything else has been for developing the new characters. I also think it's extremely premature to assume they are "filler" before we actually see what their roles will be in this story by the end. And besides! Their relationship to the B1 kits alone is worth the price of admission, when all is said and done. That meet-up will be amazing.

Yes, thank you. We all need to settle down here people!

TheRagamuffin posted:

What do you guys think the odds are that next time we see Brobot, it'll be banging its uranium heart on that rock there?

One million per cent.

Also, seriously, what the hell is Jane doing here? Teenagers are confusing, man.

Cabbit
Jul 19, 2001

Is that everything you have?

She is gearing up for one hell of a facepalm.

Starmaker
Dec 29, 2009

My people I bring you a message from the Lord!

H.P. Shivcraft posted:

Vriska, why did you mind-control Jane into saying "No"?!?!?!?!

Ohhhhhh

Man I sure am dense.

Snollygoster
Dec 17, 2002

what a scoop

Oxxidation posted:

This is pretty much the case for me, too. I don't give a poo poo about what happens to these kids at all. They're dead space. They're filler personified. I've already gotten invested in the universe-spanning Problems of sixteen characters, I can't take another ride on the shipapalooza merry-go-round at this point. I'm only stoked about updates now if they're intermissions or Roxy chatlogs.

This is how I'm feeling right now. I like Dirk and Roxy more since they seem more self-aware. I like all the new kids more when their dialogue and actions reveal things about the setting or move the plot along. It's really cruel to go from the tempo of Dirk's flash to IRC TENCHI MUYO. Still though, I think I feel this way because I'm reading it serially. If I were blowing through this part in an archive maybe it wouldn't bother me?

King of Solomon
Oct 23, 2008

S S

Starmaker posted:

Ohhhhhh

Man I sure am dense.

Not enough exclamation points. Only 1? Then 5? Come now, you know better.

H.P. Shivcraft
Mar 17, 2008

STAY UNRULY, YOU HEARTLESS MONSTERS!
I meant the Vriska comment to be a joke but if it turns out to be true I will not stop laughing ever.

All time is Vriska Time.

Aurora
Jan 7, 2008

Regy Rusty posted:

Exactly. Now I too have the perfect face to go along with my every post.

If only it had been flipped horizontally.

Starmaker
Dec 29, 2009

My people I bring you a message from the Lord!
Either that or it's AR fiddling with her computer.

KoB
May 1, 2009

H.P. Shivcraft posted:

I meant the Vriska comment to be a joke but if it turns out to be true I will not stop laughing ever.

All time is Vriska Time.

She cant mind control humans, only put them to sleep.

Sarahsuke
Mar 27, 2010
Somehow I get the feeling that the Batterwitch's plot to keep Jake and Jane apart never stopped being a thing, even across universes.

Thundarr
Dec 24, 2002


Jane, you done hosed up there. This is what happens when teenagers try to express their true feelings via SMS.

H.P. Shivcraft posted:

Vriska, why did you mind-control Jane into saying "No"?!?!?!?!

Or that. Being able to force humans to say "No" at will is no weirder than being able to make them fall asleep at will, I suppose.

Black Mage Knight
Jan 25, 2012

stop biting my cape
Batshit theory time:

What if the Condesce's human pseudonym of Betty Crocker, and Lord English's names were not only the the cause of Jane and Jake's last names, but were also caused by Jane and Jake? Like, when the Condesce is thinking of a good name to hide herself on earth with, she thinks back to the legend of the kids, and the Maid of Life, Jane Crocker, and a similar thing happens for whatever/whoever named Lord English, just with the Page of Hope, Jake English instead.


Slightly less batshit theory time:

Jake is going to spend most of the session sleeping/trying to sleep just so he can be with Lil' Mindfang (mirroring how Tavros spent most of his session), most likely after UU tells him that Lil' Mindfang is a friend of hers, causing Jake to suddenly think he has a chance with her (due to her suddenly acquired realness attribute), only to have his hopes dashed when he finds out that she is dead (which also might make him want to sleep more, and thus need someone else's help to make him face reality).

Nilbop
Jun 5, 2004

Looks like someone forgot his hardhat...
Crocker come on now, Jesus Christ.

Come on now Crocker.

Renaissance Robot
Oct 10, 2010

Bite my furry metal ass
This sure explains why Roxy was worried about Jake re: Dirk; the kid is the perfect gentleman adventurer (or adventurous gentleman :heysexy:) and probably wouldn't say no to anybody if they straight up asked him out. Gotta love him pining after blue spider girl though, pretty sure everybody saw that one coming a mile away.

Chunky12345 posted:

If only it had been flipped horizontally.

And been accompanied by "What the gently caress did I just type???". Then it would have been perfect. :v:

Rooreelooo
Sep 29, 2007

"Ask not what Spiral Mountain can do for you; ask what you can do for Spiral Mountain."
I dont really understand the plot twist that just happened. So Jane doesn't want to hook up with jake?

Oxxidation
Jul 22, 2007

Rooreelooo posted:

I dont really understand the plot twist that just happened. So Jane doesn't want to hook up with jake?

Jane is such a monumental tightass that she denies having feelings for Jake even after Jake asks her directly, and then continues to deny it while inwardly horrified at her own tightassiness. It could be a side effect of Crocker's brainwashing, or it could just be Jane exercising her terrible power of dragging out the most unexciting, tedious parts of the Alpha plotline.

The Lord of Hats
Aug 22, 2010

Hello, yes! Is being very good day for posting, no?

Rooreelooo posted:

I dont really understand the plot twist that just happened. So Jane doesn't want to hook up with jake?

No, she still likes him, but, true to life, stupid teenager stuff happened, she got flustered by him asking, and said no. And now she finds herself forever imprisoned in the friend zone.

Nilbop
Jun 5, 2004

Looks like someone forgot his hardhat...

Oxxidation posted:

the most unexciting, tedious parts of the Alpha plotline.

Just be careful where you piss because the wind is blowin' thattaway.

MyFaceBeHi
Apr 9, 2008

I was popular, once.

The Lord of Hats posted:

No, she still likes him, but, true to life, stupid teenager stuff happened, she got flustered by him asking, and said no. And now she finds herself forever imprisoned in the friend zone.

So she is basically the female version of every "redditor" ever, minus the child porn and racism?

closeted republican
Sep 9, 2005
Haha I love how Jane is behaving after loving up Jake's little proposal. I bet her mind is just one gigantic "OH gently caress", and it's making her tightass persona completely go to hell.

EDIT: haha the latest panel is awesome.

King of Solomon
Oct 23, 2008

S S
Woah, Jane, calm the hell down. You do not need that many exclamation points. Save some for later!

I love the expressions (also the brobot is indeed smashing the hell out of his uranium.)

Cleretic
Feb 3, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 4 days!
Jane has found her niche. Roxy can have typos, and Dirk can have infinite layers of irony, because Jane has now entered being able to produce the best expressions.

QueerPope
May 1, 2010

Meow.
Okay, someone with the ability to make gifs has to turn that last face into an avatar.

Oh man I'm loving these updates so so so much. These characters are so incredibly relatable. I know just what it's like to just be saying or typing stuff that doesn't match up with what I want to be saying at all but keep doing it, and I totally know Dirk's side of that situation with the whole "Haha! If you were a girl. . ." thing, except Dirk actually has a chance because apparently Jake is not not a homosexual.

I can just imagine that when the inevitable time comes when Jake and Dirk are hanging out as a couple, Jane is going to be watching on with the best contorted face to ever been seen. Not wanting to look disgusted or unsupportive but so completely disappointed and just. . . well whatever you call her emotions right now.

Nilbop
Jun 5, 2004

Looks like someone forgot his hardhat...
Oh my God Crocker get your poo poo together.

It's like your not even listening.

Ape Has Killed Ape
Sep 15, 2005

Jane has been stabbed, exploded twice, and now has just hosed up any chance of a relationship with Jake. She is not having a good say.

lesbian at Evergreen
Aug 9, 2006
Gotta give Hussie props for creating a bi-curious bromance that doesn't feel super hamfisted or forced. It's actually kind of refreshing.

Starmaker
Dec 29, 2009

My people I bring you a message from the Lord!

Nilbop posted:

Oh my God Crocker get your poo poo together.

It's like your not even listening.

She is the worst friend.

Bible Challenger posted:

Gotta give Hussie props for creating a bi-curious bromance that doesn't feel super hamfisted or forced. It's actually kind of refreshing.

Jake's thought process here is... unusual, but I can kinda imagine someone being like "hey, we like each other, why not try dating?" It isn't terrible. And Jane's reactions, now that I finally understand what the hell is going on with her, are hilarious.

Oh Jake, you so open-minded. You are the best Hero of Hope.

Skeleton Mom
Aug 11, 2008

She's literally having a friendship aneurysm.

drat that's an old reference..

Skeleton Mom fucked around with this message at 11:07 on Feb 21, 2012

Fagtastic
Apr 9, 2009

I may have sucked robodick, fucked a robot in the exhaust, been fucked by robots & enjoy it to the exclusion of human partners; at least I'm not a goddamn :roboluv:

Bible Challenger posted:

Gotta give Hussie props for creating a bi-curious bromance that doesn't feel super hamfisted or forced. It's actually kind of refreshing.

I find Hussies treatment of gay stuff exceptional in this regard. It's neither fetishistic, nor exclusively material for a joke, nor still does he make his gay relationships inevitably and excessively tragic. Which puts him in extremely rare company. Like, 'I can't think of a single example off the top of my head' rare.

Starmaker
Dec 29, 2009

My people I bring you a message from the Lord!
It's pretty telling that I just assumed this relationship would fail. And so did pretty much everyone else in this thread. I mean, Jake's obviously not gay, right? I mean obviously.

The simple fact that this is a mature and fair handling of the topic almost makes up for all the shipping crap.

(But of course we all know he's going to end up with Jane in the end, for reasons. Perhaps Dirk will break destroy his heart.)

Starmaker fucked around with this message at 11:11 on Feb 21, 2012

king of no pants
Mar 10, 2007

i'm watchin'
you post

Fagtastic posted:

I find Hussies treatment of gay stuff exceptional in this regard. It's neither fetishistic, nor exclusively material for a joke, nor still does he make his gay relationships inevitably and excessively tragic. Which puts him in extremely rare company. Like, 'I can't think of a single example off the top of my head' rare.

Pretty much this. It is a delightful chance of pace.

Now to find some way to fenangle this last page into a working avatar.

Clawtopsy
Dec 17, 2009

What a fascinatingly unusual cock. Now, allow me to show you my collection...

king of no pants posted:

Pretty much this. It is a delightful chance of pace.

Now to find some way to fenangle this last page into a working avatar.

I've been trying to get the IDIOT part into a working avatar since this update came out, and it always comes out looking grainy, like so:



:sigh:

SatansBestBuddy
Sep 26, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
Why does Jake suddenly have an Irish accent?

I know I'm just reading his voice in my head but it popped up so suddenly it kinda caught me off guard, and yet it fits so perfectly.

Must be the green text.

Also this is easily one of the best relationship chats in the whole of Homestuck, and considering how many of those we've had up till now that's pretty surprising. (but does it top the Karkat/John/Dave threeway? Need to find that one again)

Saradiart
Dec 13, 2009

OPENING MY TAI CHI IS ABOUT AS APPEALING AS THE GOATMAN OPENING HIS ANUS
I really can't stand how he's starting to use such a thick outline outside of sprite modes.

I hate change apparently.

Bongo Bill
Jan 17, 2012

I find humans talking about their feelings to be vastly more interesting than trolls talking about their feelings. Right now I am thinking I could watch any combination of the kids shooting the breeze about any topic, no matter how pointless, and I would say "This is delightful," and as long as thirteen (fourteen, now?) certain other characters weren't involved, I wouldn't even notice if no plot was happening.

am I racist

Rohan Kishibe
Oct 29, 2011

Frankly, I don't like you
and I never have.
Nah, just xenophobic :v:

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Jewasaurus
Aug 3, 2011


Made the idiot part into an avatar, but for some reason I couldn't get it going as fast as it is in the panel, probably something to do with making the gif in photoshop and not flash.

(Is 125x125 the right size? :ohdear:)

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