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 Americans are the worst.
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Apr 2, 2012 23:08
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Babby Thatcher posted:that's incredible If only Jonny Wilkinson had played football then England would have won all the world cups since 2002, don't you know.
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Apr 2, 2012 23:09
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American articles like that about football are my favourite loving things, they are briliant
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Apr 2, 2012 23:10
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All the way from Yahoo: How MANY penalties and Red Cards did WEBB hand out to Blackburn today? Heard there was an elbow on someone small and ginger and the referee didnt take any action Knowing Webb , it was a Blackburn player that got elbowed. Again heard a lad of 19 got slapped on the face.......knowing Webb its yet again a Blackburn player that was slapped And I heard LUCKY United won 0-2........it was two penalties surely which Webb awarded for a Man United player pushing a Blackburn player Am I right? (of course I am)
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Apr 2, 2012 23:11
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vyelkin posted:If only Jonny Wilkinson had played football then England would have won all the world cups since 2002, don't you know. similarly, if Chris Waddle had played rugby,
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Apr 2, 2012 23:11
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That has to be parody. It hits all the right marks. They even think Celtic are an Irish team. Only someone who's really studied Americans could get all the little things exactly right.
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Apr 2, 2012 23:18
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Babby Thatcher posted:that's incredible leo messi stranded on revis island
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Apr 2, 2012 23:20
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If only Cristiano Ronaldo was an F1 driver, Portugal could win things. And if only Leo Messi played basketball, then Argentina could win the Olympics.
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Apr 2, 2012 23:21
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Imagine if Charlie Adam played baseball... wow...
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Apr 2, 2012 23:25
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if Andy Carroll played basketball he'd still be poo poo but loads of idiot fucker college fans would dub him 'the new Larry Bird' and he'd get drafted real high and doom the pacers or some shite to another decade of irrelevance and all the turds who hyped him would go back to castefootball.us fun to think about, imo
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Apr 2, 2012 23:25
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Babby Thatcher posted:if Andy Carroll played basketball he'd still be poo poo but loads of idiot fucker college fans would dub him 'the new Larry Bird' and he'd get drafted real high and doom the pacers or some shite to another decade of irrelevance and all the turds who hyped him would go back to castefootball.us This made me laugh. Thank you, IPB.
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Apr 2, 2012 23:25
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Leo Messi can kick things why isn't he a kicker in the NFL? Doesn't he know the highest honor on earth is a super bowl ring
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Apr 2, 2012 23:28
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What if Yakubu were a WWE...
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Apr 2, 2012 23:30
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Just think of Wayne Gretzky up front, breaking records for goals scored in a season.
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Apr 2, 2012 23:31
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Stone Cold Charlie Austin forever headlining 'mania
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Apr 3, 2012 01:53
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that article just cannot be real, it's too loving good
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Apr 3, 2012 02:30
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jyrka posted:Imagine if Charlie Adam played baseball... wow... this is by far the best of the responses so far, excellent work.
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Apr 3, 2012 02:51
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Babby Thatcher posted:Stone Cold Charlie Austin forever headlining 'mania I see nothing wrong with this
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Apr 3, 2012 08:56
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Americans see Usain Bolt and think "hmm this sprinting thing is all well and good, but what if he were a wide receiver???"
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Apr 3, 2012 14:53
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Monday Bandele posted:Americans see Usain Bolt and think "hmm this sprinting thing is all well and good, but what if he were a wide receiver???" To be fair, Usain Bolt sees Usain Bolt and thinks "hmm this sprinting thing is all well and good, but what if I was an inside forward???" one day someone is going to offer him that contract he wants and he's going to be the new That German Bloke Who Was Crap But Fast
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Apr 3, 2012 15:06
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Apr 3, 2012 15:11
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Spangly A posted:one day someone is going to offer him that contract he wants and he's going to be the new That German Bloke Who Was Crap But Fast Walcott's English, mate.
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Apr 3, 2012 15:47
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Did Dwain Chambers ever play a proper NFL game in the end?
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Apr 3, 2012 16:00
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Fat Guy Sexting posted:Did Dwain Chambers ever play a proper NFL game in the end? No I think the guardian summed it up as him being "the third best running back in the third worst team in a third rate league" or words to that effect.
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Apr 3, 2012 16:02
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ochocinco...
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Apr 3, 2012 16:12
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For one i see a fantastic keeper thats won golden gloves and accolades galore....i see i young defensive unit that untill injuries was the tightest in the division barring city....i see a very young midfield......Jonjo-Jay-Hendo-Lucas...whats the average age with them lot?......i see Stevie fuckin G....i see one of the best attacking players in the league in Suarez....i see i giant young Geordie forward...i see loving potential....i see the big loving picture...i see a young, british orientated base that given the time and a dusting of foriegn magic will be a top side in the division for the next ten years not the next ten months...and i havnt even got round to talking about the little winger and his mates inthe reserves....i tell you what mate you keep paying your 48 quid to watch the spineless...i`ll just come onto RAWK there`s plenty of spineless on here for free.
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Apr 3, 2012 18:08
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liverpool is on its knees and taking a gigantic load of foreign magic is the only way this nightmare is going to end imo
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Apr 3, 2012 19:35
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has anyone that isnt a liverpool fan ever given a gently caress about golden gloves?
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Apr 3, 2012 20:30
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St Evan Echoes posted:has anyone that isnt a liverpool fan ever given a gently caress about golden gloves? Floyd Mayweather and Mike Tyson give a gently caress about Golden Gloves.
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Apr 4, 2012 03:39
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http://www.chelsea.vitalfootball.co.uk/article.asp?a=528496 next season on the Premier League: out pops a smiling villas boas
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Apr 4, 2012 04:23
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appledan posted:http://www.chelsea.vitalfootball.co.uk/article.asp?a=528496 
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Apr 4, 2012 06:42
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For most of my life, and all of my time on SomethingAwful, the only two sports I have shown an interest in are football and baseball. The only time my life and soccer have crossed paths was a buddy's rec team I agreed to join the summer before I left for university. Having played lacrosse the last 9 years, the season became a yellow-card-ridden trial and error process of figuring out how much contact was allowed, and getting rid of the ball before something bad could happen that would end up resting on my shoulders. The World Cup 2 years ago got me thinking that it wouldn't be hard to be a fan, so after it ended I stayed on the eastern side of the pond to begin a journey. There were already numerous threads started by others in the same position as me, so I figured this an excellent place to start. After hours upon hours of reading, it seemed my course of action was already laid: I would watch tons of games and let the team choose me, much in a Harry Potter's wand sort of way. This seems to induce some kind of extra close bond, which in the case of world class athletes I will say "no homo" but not object. I looked up the next good match to watch, and lucky for me it was tomorrow! Which is now today!!! The match has just ended, for those of you who don't know it was FC Barcelona vs AC Milan, and ended 3-1 in Barca's (already working on my slang) favor. Going into this game, from my reading, I knew Barcelona was always a top contender in its league, and arguably the best in Spain and the world. I also knew Milan was the best in Italy and its league as well. But it seemed Barcelona always had bandwagon fans due to its success and was a flashy team. This greatly reminded me of our New England Patriots, a team I detest in the states, so I decided Barcelona was not a team I could get behind before the game even started. During the game, I enjoyed watching it. It was obvious Milan didn't have much of a chance. Although Barcelona was clearly better, they were not extraordinarily interesting by any means. Messi, who I had read before was a great player, obviously fit his hype and it was easy to tell I was watching one of the great athletes of the sport. The few times Milan had the ball for an extended amount of time, they didn't exactly lose my interest. I would love to see this team against someone closer to their own caliber. All in all, today was a great introduction to the sport. After being bombarded by the cornucopia of leagues and teams Europe has to offer, even crossing just one of my list of potential favorites feels like a good start. I look forward to my journey further into the sport, and will keep this updated as much as I can. I would love feedback, conversation, and discussion. Thanks!
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Apr 4, 2012 07:00
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appledan posted:For most of my life, and all of my time on SomethingAwful, the only two sports I have shown an interest in are football and baseball. The only time my life and soccer have crossed paths was a buddy's rec team I agreed to join the summer before I left for university. Having played lacrosse the last 9 years, the season became a yellow-card-ridden trial and error process of figuring out how much contact was allowed, and getting rid of the ball before something bad could happen that would end up resting on my shoulders. The World Cup 2 years ago got me thinking that it wouldn't be hard to be a fan, so after it ended I stayed on the eastern side of the pond to begin a journey. All I can think of when I see posts like this is Russ's youtube video
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Apr 4, 2012 08:05
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Ewar Woowar posted:All I can think of when I see posts like this is Russ's youtube video Deserves a reposting https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSGpiJ1Zvhw
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Apr 4, 2012 09:55
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Loving Africa Chaps posted:Deserves a reposting Holy loving poo poo that's fantastic.
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Apr 4, 2012 10:01
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It was a set-up all along!   1. Media starts the pre season build up saying things like 'it's anyones title' ' City are dangerous this year' ' Chelsea are strong'. The stage is set. 2. Season starts referees are instructed by their paymasters at Sky to be fair and consistent, create a bit of a mish mash at the top so it looks like it will be a real competitive season. 3. Just before Xmas the powers that be give their briefing to the officials and the media prepare their ' United get stronger after xmas' headlines and 'United have the experience' ' City will bottle it' headlines. Again the stage is set. 4. Next phase is to weaken Uniteds opposition, time to throw in some strange red cards, turn a blind eye to obvious yellow cards increasing the pressure on uniteds opposition. The media now start producing their training ground photographs of bust ups(but I've never seen one from united) this creates negativity. 5. Now the critical phase which is to give united enough belief and confidence to take command, they are given penalties and freekicks and opposition players are red carded for the most minor offences. In the background the media now start their ' United are great' headlines. 6. After months of this Uniteds opponents are now so disheartened at their lack of decisions and missing colleagues due to suspension start to lower their heads. The result = United 'win' the title the opposition manager is forced out by the media leaving them in a yet weaker position. Que the headlines 'united charge to the title' etc and the paymasters at sky count the profits from the army of armchair rags who subscribe again for next season when the headlines start again.......
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Apr 4, 2012 10:39
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Babby Thatcher posted:if Andy Carroll played basketball he'd still be poo poo but loads of idiot fucker college fans would dub him 'the new Larry Bird' and he'd get drafted real high and doom the pacers or some shite to another decade of irrelevance and all the turds who hyped him would go back to castefootball.us The great white dope.
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Apr 4, 2012 12:12
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I think its laughable how some people just expect carra to give up his place!! carra is a fierce competitor and hell never do that...what the gently caress do people expect from him..to come out and and say oh i think a 21 year old kid from uruguay with no premier league experience can perform better than me in a team that im vice captain of and lifted several trophies with so coach please put me on the fuckin bench!! some ridiculous comments in here..this legend has a mentality most of us will never ever have so stop trying to get in his psyche!!! support him for all he did for this club for gods sake!! I can't stop reading RAWK
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Apr 4, 2012 18:32
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If this thread just isn't enough for you, check out https://twitter.com/#!/RAWK_Meltdown
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Apr 4, 2012 20:30
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That's pretty funny, but would you be arsed?
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Apr 4, 2012 20:33
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